Title: How to Catch 'Straight' a Guy

Genre: Romance/ Humor

Rating: T

Disclaimer: I no own

Note: This fic is AU, has OOC, Yaoi, Yuri, and some odd couples. Pairings include: 1x2, 3x4, 5xR and various others. If you are uncomfortable with any of those this is not the fic for you.

Summary: I'm Duo Maxwell, an all in all sexy beast. Just about every girl wants me. Unfortunately for them I'm as straight as the letter 'S'. And unfortunatly for me I just so happen to be crushing on the straightest guy in school.


STEP VI: Befriend Him


It was the last football practice of the year for the senior players, so needless to say Quatre and I were sitting our happy asses on the freezing bleachers as usual.

Trowa was out to kick, and we watched him, amused with his body language. He looked so relaxed, like he wasn't even bothered by the cold. Granted, spring was right around the corner, the frost was melting and we no longer had to wear more than two layers, but Trowa made it look like a fresh summer day.

I looked over at Quat, "So… how far have you and Tro gotten? First base? Second base? Second and a half?"

Quat furrowed his eyebrows before laughing a bit, "What's second and a half?"

I wagged my eyebrows suggestively before taking a fisted hand in front of my mouth and moving it closer and further, my tongue making a bump from the inside of my cheek, in perfect sync with the hand motion.

Q's face flushed, "No! Dude, we barely know each other!"

I grinned and shrugged, "That's good I guess, no blowies for you or Tro until you're ready." I nodded at him.

He sighed, "What about you? How's your plan going?"

"I'm thinking of just trying to be his friend," I stated before quickly adding, "for now."

"Wow Duo, that's so smart of you. Listening to mine and Wufei's advice now after months of us telling you this," Quatre said, sarcasm laced in his words. But no matter how much a prick Quatre was trying to be, it only made me throw my head back and laugh.


The next day after school found me with the rest of the drama whores listening to Cathy go on about the play. Luckily I was stuck with lighting. This meant I got to sit up in room behind the audience and press buttons. Had this been ten years ago I would've been stuck up in the rafters, how I love technological advances.

Cathy wasn't happy with me, I had missed the audition, and it seems she really wanted me to be in the play. It made me feel a little guilty.

I wasn't really needed that day, I knew what I had to do, but right now it was focused on the actors memorizing everything. I was grouped in with the set makers.

"Hey, Duo," A cast member, Alex, called me over from his position of painting a town, "can you get me the can of blue paint? It's next to Cathy's seat."

I looked over at Cathy's seat, off of the stage and where the audience would be. "No prob," I said, walking towards the steps.

Unfortunately that was when Trowa came in, Heero following. I'm embarrassed to say that I had missed step, promptly falling off of the stage and hitting my head.

My eyes snapped open and I gagged. Moving away from the horrid smell which brought me back.

"Glad that you're alive," Cathy's voice said from above me, "you have a pretty nasty bump on your head. Do you want me to call your parents?" She asked while giving the smelling salts in her hand to someone to be thrown away.

"What about giving me head?" I asked, confused.

She laughed nervously. "Oh jeez. Stay where you are. Do you need me to call 9-1-1?" Her lavender eyes peered at me. "What's your mom's number?"

"Wha-?" I asked her, still slightly confused.

"You fell off of the stage." Trowa said to me, the other drama whores were all looking at me worriedly, "You may have a concussion. Cathy's calling your parents so that you can be taken to the doctors and be checked out."

"What's your name?" Heero asked, from behind him I could hear Cathy on the phone.

"Duo Maxwell," I answered automatically.

"Do you know what year it is? What date?" He inquired. I guess to make sure I didn't have something wrong with me.

"Uh, yeah?" I then proceeded to tell him.

After about ten more minutes of what seemed like interrogation, Heero let me be.

"Ok," Cathy came back up to me, "You mom wanted to know if you were okay enough to walk home. She says she's a nurse?"

"Yeah," I confirmed.

"I don't want you walking. Heero, take him home." She ordered.

Heero merely shrugged before carefully helping me up. Trowa handed him his car keys.

I took my bag from Heero, grateful that he didn't offer to carry it; I didn't need him to emasculate me.

"Where's your stuff?" I asked him a bit belatedly as we walked to the school's parking lot.

"In Trowa's truck." He answered easily as we made it to said truck. The ride was spent in silence. My head was pounding the entire time.

We made it up to my front door in record time.

"Here we are," I said awkwardly.

Heero nodded, watching me pull out my house keys.

"Do you want to come inside or something?" I asked, I sounded like a dork.

"I should be heading back." Heero declined politely, yet neither of us made an effort to move.

"You want to hang out sometime? Like go to the arcade or something?" I suddenly blurted out.

Heero looked at me for a moment before nodding, a small smile on his face, "Sure. We'll make definite plans later. For now, just make sure that your head is okay."

I nodded, he nodded again, and then we went our separate ways. I felt like jumping up and down, happy to have finally made some type of move. If it weren't for my headache.

I wasn't surprised to find Hilde and Lu was both sitting at the kitchen table. Looking like identical twins at that too. What with each of them doing their homework table while drinking hot cocoa and eating from a plate of gingerbread men cookies. And then there was that damn purple hair.

Both looked up at me when I entered the house. Their blue eyes following my every move. It was unnerving.

"What?" I finally snapped.

Hilde sniggered while Lu shook her head.

I grinned at them, setting my own things down at the table and starting my own homework. My head didn't feel so bad anymore, and I was pretty sure that I didn't have a concussion. Although I had a sinking feeling that they had spied on Heero and I before I unlocked the door. But it didn't matter, because this was the real beginning of mine and Heero's beautiful friendship.


TBC


Originally Written: 4/28/09
Rewritten: 7/25/12


MLL: A big thank you to the three people who're reading this revamp. You know who you are.