Imperfections & Flaws

Chapter 3: It's so Loud Inside my Head

The carriage ride to London was not a long one. It was ten minutes at most. To me, it felt as if the ride was taking an eternity or so. I don't know when was the last time I was in such a populated place. I've practically spent three-fourths of my life in that orphanage. I don't know how to live my life now as I'm technically free and don't have anybody hovering over me, watching my moves or actions every minute of my life. I'm free and it feels...I don't know how to describe what I'm feeling right now. My emotions are on the edge of bliss and grief at the same time, almost as if my emotions were a pendulum swaying back and forth. The only downside to my freedom was the sacrifice of my one and only friend. I hope he's in a better place now; he deserves it, poor soul.

Now, for my revenge…how was I going to go about this? Am I just going to march straight up to Gideon and have Claude execute him? Who else has ever wronged me…the Queen. The Queen ordered Gideon to the orphanage. If it weren't for her jurisdiction, Ret and I would never have encountered him. Ret would still be alive. The Queen, the Queen's the blame! However much I want them all dead, I can't just march up to them and have their bodies butchered up. No, this is going to take some time. My revenge was going to be long and sweet. I am going to enjoy it, not let it flash by me in an instant. They'll suffer, those bastards.

All of these thoughts were swirling in my head during the ride. It mainly kept flashing back to Ret and his death. It seemed as if someone had put that scene on infinite repeat in my mind. I just couldn't just get rid of the thoughts regardless of how much I tried to distract myself. Eventually, I think Claude caught onto my distress as his eyes lingered on mines. I wouldn't look at him though; I refused to. I'm a strong person despite the hell I've been through. I wasn't about to reveal my weaknesses to the demon beside me, the demon that could easily take advantage of the situation.

"Claude," I turned my head towards him and shifted my eyes to his. "This is going to be your second order…I want you to never lie to me. Is this clear?" Even though a part of his contract was to never hurt me, I could never be sure. Better safe than sorry as they say.

"Yes, Ophelia. I understand," he replied as his eyes narrowed. It seemed he was suspicious of me as well. Who was to blame him? An adolescent girl suddenly contracted with him while looking as if she had just fought a war and narrowly survived. An adolescent girl that seemed so lost and broken, yet she stood strong and held her ground. A human that Claude had never encountered in his lifespan as a demon.

"Good. Do you know how much longer it'll take to get to London?" I asked as I turned my head back the other way towards my side of the carriage.

"Judging from the speed of the carriage and the change in scenery, not long. If anything, we should be there in less than five minutes."

"Mm."

That was good news, we would be arriving to a new town together as new people. I would not be recognized, and I could start anew. Well, it was not like I would be recognized anyways as I have never left the orphanage grounds until now.

The carriage slowly pulled to a stop as the horses in the front let out a tired neigh. I looked over to my left to see the seat empty and Claude gone. What the…when did he leave? How did I not notice? It was probably one of his demonic abilities. Seeing and experiencing his powers sets me on edge sometimes as I'm always waiting for the unexpected when it comes to him.

The door swung open and there stood Claude with his hand outstretched to me. I glanced at it and hesitantly took it. He then helped me out of the carriage, closed the door, then paid the driver a small pouch of coins. My eyes flickered to the coin pouch then to his eyes. He caught my message and leaned down.

"Money does not mean anything to demons, I can acquire meaningless things such as that easily," he whispered before pulling back and standing straight. I nodded at his response. "Follow me," he said as he began to lead the way to what I assumed to be our flat.

The flat didn't look so bad. It was quite decent, tall but sturdy. I opened the door and walked inside to find the rooms already fully decorated with furnishings and various items placed neatly away. It seemed like I was walking into someone else's home.

"Claude, did you buy all of this stuff?" I asked, amazed as I have never seen the majority of the items that lay before me.

"Yes, as I said before: money is not a problem. Is there anything else you wish for specifically?" he asked, bowing slightly again.

"N-No. This is good, thank you. You made it seem like a home already. You've actually done more than what I requested," I said, pointing out the effort he seemed to put into decorating the place. I walked around and picked up a flower from the vase resting on the table in the main room. The flower was a bluebell. I knew this because these flowers grew wildly around the playgrounds of the orphanage. I turned back around and my eyes met Claude's. Claude was just standing there, still as if he didn't know how to move.

"Claude, you need to act…more human. People don't stand around still like a rock all day, we move around you know," I said pointing out his odd behavior.

"Yes, Ophelia. I know that humans do not stand still all day although life would be simpler if they did. I will try to act more human-like in public, but I do not see the purpose of acting when I am in the premises of my shelter where I have absolute privacy from the rest of the world," he replied as he began to walk over to the stairs that my eyes had skipped over. I began to follow him as he led me up the stairs. The stairs were old, but sustainable. They held our weights fine, but the noise was eerie as if every step pained the stairs. We finally reached the top and two doors stood opposite of each other. "My room is the room on the left, yours to the right."

"Ah…thank you. Now if you don't mind, I'll just head to my room for a while. Please feel free to do whatever it is that you normally do until I call for you. Oh, and if you can, please prepare a meal as I haven't eaten in the last six hours. Thank you, Claude."

"As you wish, Ophelia. Anything that you request, I will abide to," Claude said before shutting the door to my room. The sound of his footsteps could be heard as the stairs were shrieking.

I took the time to explore about my new room. It was certainly superior to the room at the orphanage. Hell, anything was better than that abysmal hell hole. The room wasn't anything special, I noted. There was a bed built for two in the center of the room. Surrounding it was a few bookcases. There were only two windows in this room. I walked over to the first window, the one on the back wall. From the safety of my room, I watched the bustling streets of London in action. Gentlemen with ladies on their arms, chatting about simple nothings. Little boys and girls playing in an alley with old crates that were not of use anymore. My eyes wavered over to the building across from our flat. It seemed that we lived across from a morgue. I vaguely remembered Claude mentioning this, but he certainly did. The building appeared suspicious to me as the sign read, "Undertaker's". Who was this Undertaker? Was he the owner? Curiosity got the best of me. I started to head downstairs and out the front door. I wanted to know what that place contained.

Walking across the street was not a simple feat as I haven't encountered this many people before. I constantly bumped into random people I didn't know and kept muttering apologies as they turned around and commented. I finally made it across without causing too much trouble. My hand reached out for the door to push it forward. A small bell jingle was heard above me as the door quickly closed behind me. I leaned my back against the door, keeping it shut. I was getting paranoid now as nobody else could be seen in the room. I took this opportunity to walk around and explore the place. While gazing upwards at the shelves along the walls, I didn't notice the obstacles on the ground and clumsily tripped over what looked to be a coffin. I pushed myself off my knees fast and backed up. The coffin opened up slowly and small chuckling could be heard emanating from it.

"Heheh~ What brings you here, young lady? Are you here for a coffin? I think I have the perfect size for you," a man began to speak as he slowly sat up and adjusted his robes. His looks threw me off as everything on him from head to toe was gray. He wore a gray hat with messy gray hair covering his face. A portion of his hair was braided into one long strand and his long bangs parted to cover his eyes. His robes were baggy with chains dangling off of the side. I narrowed my eyes to get a closer look at him. He had noticeable scars on his body, mainly his neck and face. The mysterious man held his hand out to me, attempting to shake my hand. I only stared at his hand seeing as I didn't even know the man and I was by myself with him here. Looking closer, I noted that his nails were painted black and were long; longer than men's fingernails should be.

Noticing that I wasn't going to take his hand, he pulled it back and his grin turned into a frown.

"Shhhi…you're no fun. Hehehe, lighten up~! You're too stiff, want me to help~?" he asked as he began to step towards me. Every step forward he took, I would take two back until I bumped into the wall. In my head, I was calling for Claude to come and find me here. "Hmm~. How very rude of me, I forgot to introduce myself! My name is Undertaker and I own this morgue you're at. So, why the visit~? Are you maybe here for…information?" he asked once more, settling himself on the lid of the coffin he appeared out of. His hands were resting on his lap while his fingers were busy twiddling.

"I-I was curious as to who owned this place. You see, I live across the street from you. I just recently moved here actually," I replied casually. While I spoke, my eyes zoomed in on random items strewn around the morgue. Upon the shelves sat jars full of opaque water with what seemed to be organs inside. My face cringed in disgust.

"Ah, a new face. Say, where did you say you were from before? It seemed to slip my ears~," he asked, throwing me a creepy grin. Well, I deemed it as creepy since I couldn't see his eyes and only his smile was the first noticeable thing I saw when he first appeared.

"I…I didn't say where I was from. If you must know, I'm from a nearby town from here; not too far away," I replied, trying to avoid disclosing my former whereabouts to this mysterious chap. There was a long silence as the Undertaker kept grinning at me. It was beginning to unnerve me and in my head, I kept calling for Claude to come find me. Soon enough, the bell that hung over the door rung once more signaling a visitor. I looked over to who entered and saw that Claude was standing there stiff as a board, appearing to be tense. "C-Claude?" His eyes flickered over to where my voice came from and nodded.

"As you requested, I am here to fetch you and to tell you that dinner is prepared. Now if you please, follow me as it is unsafe to walk by yourself during late hours," he said as he walked over and grabbed my arm roughly.

During this whole scene, the Undertaker was watching Claude carefully, his grin long gone from his face. It appeared to me that they were both tense, seemingly ready to break out into a fight at any given moment. The whole time, I wondered. Why the animosity? It's only been nearly a day but I have to say I haven't seen Claude behave like this at all. Was he normally this way when around strangers? The Undertaker's joyfulness seemed to disappear as soon as Claude came into the room. My eyes shifted back and fro from Undertaker to Claude. Their expressions didn't change as Claude was staring at Undertaker directly, not blinking. I yanked on Claude's sleeve gently, signaling to him that we should leave. I turned back around and faced Undertaker.

"I'm sorry we got off on the wrong foot. Look, since I'll be living here for a while, I'd like to get to know you better if that's alright with you," I asked politely, waiting for his response.

His cheerfulness seemed to come back as he replied with an enthusiastic, "Of course, my dearest. Anytime you want, stop on by. I'll be waiting Ophelia~." He waved to me as Claude guided me out of the door. While on the way out of the door, I realized that I had not introduced myself or given Undertaker a name yet he bid me farewell using my name. Maybe it was mentioned by Claude and he picked up on it. What a weird fellow he is, indeed.

Even though the walk wasn't that long, Claude was tugging hard and I practically had to jog a few steps to keep up with his long and fast strides. Once inside of the house, he released me roughly and walked to the kitchen area. I walked into the room cautiously as it seemed he was in a rather sour mood. I rubbed my arms gently as his grip was tight.

"Claude, is there anything wrong? It's only the first day, why are you so bitter?" I asked quietly.

My question wasn't answered as he attempted to dodge the question by busying himself with pretend work. I don't know what was wrong with him, but I figured it'd be best to just leave him alone for a while. He needed to cool down from whatever caused him to heat up like that. Was it the Undertaker that caused his cold persona?

Claude turned around, and with a stern face, told me, "Dinner is prepared and is awaiting at the table. After you finish dining, the bath will be arranged and ready for you."

"Thank you, Claude," I whispered quietly, not wanting him to get any angrier. At my response, he bowed and sharply left the room to tend to the bath.

I ate in complete silence as I let my thoughts run wildly through my head. The whole idea of my revenge and how to start it was harder than I thought because I didn't have any idea where to begin. I tried asking Claude, but he refused to tell me what to do or give me advice since he is only supposed to do my bidding, not my thinking.

I let out a small sigh and shifted my body so that my legs were crossed while I was sitting. My head rested on my left elbow as I used my right to stir the food in the bowl around with ennui. I continued stirring, letting my thoughts go loose as I didn't have the energy to reel them back in. As a matter of fact, I was so enticed in my boredom that I didn't notice Claude walk down the stairs and stand next to me until I felt his warm breath hit my neck. Once the feeling of his hot breath hit my neck, I immediately shot up and sat rigid against the chair with my back to the table.

"C-Claude, don't do that. You scared the life out of me," I said as I tried to calm my heartbeat down and recompose myself.

"I am sorry, Ophelia. I merely wanted to tell you that your bath is ready," he said as he gestured upstairs to where the steam was drifting from. "Would you like some help?" His tone surprised me as his character shifted from stoic to suggestive and seductive.

"What game are you trying to play at Claude? I hope you know, I don't take well to games," I replied. I stood up, huffed and began walking away from him towards the upstairs bathroom.

"Wait Ophelia, once again I am sorry. I am merely acting upon experience from what I have learned from my previous masters. The one before you, the extremely vain woman, she found it rather charming when I seduced people."

"That doesn't mean you can just take what you learned and apply it to me, Claude. I hope you can tell, but I'm entirely different from that woman that was your previous master."

"Of course, my apologies for assuming so. But we should get back to the topic at hand, which is the bath that is currently awaiting you. I will be downstairs once you are finished."

I didn't say anything as I turned around and made my way up the stairs. I closed the door quietly and began to walk to the bath tub with only the sounds of the 'pit-pat' of my feet crossing the room. In the process of walking to the bathtub, I began to discard my clothing in random directions. I sighed in content as I lowered my body into the hot water that engulfed me. The bath was so relaxing that I leaned back and eventually dozed off as the water soothed out my tensed muscles. I was awoken by the light tapping on the door. I opened one eye wearily and replied with a, 'Come in.'

As I requested, Claude came in holding a folded towel in his arms. He casually set the towel down on the side of the bathtub and turned towards me. His glasses were becoming fogged and steamy as the temperature of the water had not gone down any bit.

"Ophelia, it is late as of already. It is best if you finish up with your bath then retire for the night since tomorrow we have to plot the beginning of your, revenge." I paused and stared at him directly in the eyes. I wasn't self-conscious about my body as I knew Claude couldn't do anything to hurt me. I turned my head and used my arms to lift myself out of the bathtub. I hadn't stood up for a while as I fell asleep in the bathtub, so my legs were shaky. Almost all of my limbs were asleep, or numb with a tingling feeling. I stepped out of the bathtub, water dripping down my legs and hair. I grabbed the towel, dried myself off, then wrapped it around my body as I walked out the door with Claude following behind me closely.

The door to my room was opened before I walked in. I found a nightgown placed on my bed with two candles lit. One candle was placed on my nightstand and the other was in the hand of Claude. He stood by the door emotionless as I dropped the towel and quickly threw on the nightgown without any effort. I sat on my bed and let my gaze linger at the butler before nodding to him and tucking myself in. He took my nod as a cue to blow out the candle and the one by my nightstand. He then left the room, closing my door gently so that the sound would not disturb my sleep. What he didn't know was that I didn't sleep for quite some time as horrible memories kept swarming my head. It was around early morning before I finally drifted off to sleep.

"What the…what is this place? Where am I? Hello? Is anyone here?" I yelled out in confusion as I was surrounded by white nothingness. There wasn't much to take in as there wasn't anything around me. "Hey! Come on, answer me! Where am I?" I asked to particularly nobody.

"Lily? Is that you?" A voice asked me from behind. My body froze and my eyes went wide. I recognized that voice. That voice belonged to someone who wasn't with me anymore, someone dear and precious. I turned around and was met by an enormous, eerie shadow that had the face of Gideon Eldridge. His face wasn't that far away from mines, only a few centimeters. His gleaming eyes filled with craze stared into my eyes, and what felt to be my soul. His maniacal grin was still planted on his face, as if it was permanently pressed on. His mouth then shifted to form the words, 'I love you', but all that came out was Garret's voice. I didn't know how to react as I backed up from the entity. With every step that I took back, it would repeat more words using Garret's voice. It would spew blasphemy such as, "Save me, Lily!" or "I loved you Lily, why did you give up on me? You're a horrible person who can't even hold themself to their words! Liar!"

"No! It's not that, Ret! I couldn't save you…I didn't know how. Please don't blame me!" I screamed back in desperation.

"Liarliar…liar…liar…liar…ar…ar…ar," the words continued to echo on as the room was cleared of everything, leaving only a small laugh lingering in the air.

My body shot up from my bed. My bed, my sheets, and my body were covered in my perspiration. I looked around the room to make sure there wasn't anything nearby that was out to get me. I turned quickly to my left and screamed as I was startled by Claude's red eyes. His eyes glowed profusely and seemed to calm my nerves down as my body slumped and I relaxed.

"What happened, Ophelia? You were screaming for thirteen minutes continuously and would not wake up when I attempted to wake you. Did you have a nightmare?" Asked Claude, his voice still monotonous.

"Yes, Claude. I had…a n-nightmare. I dreamt that Ret was speaking to me…white room…Gideon…entity…blame…it's my fault," I began rambling as I wrapped my arms around myself to reassure myself that I was still alive. I stopped my actions for a second and reached out to grab Claude's face. I held his face in my hands and made him look directly at me. My eyes displayed anxiety and fear as I searched his eyes for anything that would reveal what my dream was about. His eyes were simply empty and void of any emotions or thoughts. I let go of his face and pushed him away. I scooted to the other side of the bed and wrapped the covers over my head. "Claude…don't leave. I want you to stay here until I fall asleep; no, all night. I want you to protect me from my nightmares. Don't ever let them come back, ever."

"Yes, my lady," Claude responded as he bowed then stood by the window with his arms by his side. I was too side tracked by the horrendous dream that I experienced that I didn't notice Claude and his formalities. The night was silent save for the few whimpers that escaped my throat and the tossing and turning in my bed. It seemed to me, even though I was asleep, that the sun would never come up as my sleep felt endless.


A/N: So how do you like chapter three? c: It took me a while, but I got it finished. Also, thanks to my beta Phantom Hitman 1412 for catching errors where I couldn't. :)