Once again, I'd like to thank kimbclar, Allen Pitt, and lildevil0644 for reviewing. The ONLY ones to review! Ergo, this chapter is for you!

I own all 7 seasons of Buffy on DVD and a copy of Final Fantasy 7. Does that count?

Chapter Three

Left Inside Me

Buffy's Point of View

"Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so."

Douglas Adams

The next thing I knew, Cloud, Tifa, and Aerith were fighting in a forest. Their opponent was a young woman in tan shorts and a green shirt. A familiar person again. They knocked her out and stood around her in confusion.

She slowly came to. "Man, I can't believe I lost," she moaned as she stumbled to her feet. "You spiky headed jerk! One more time, let's go one more time," she exclaimed, bouncing up and down with a renewal of unspent energy. This could get irritating in a hurry.

Cloud looked at her completely dispassionately. "Not interested," he said coolly.

The girl ran around the group. "Thinking of running?" she mocked boisterously. "Stay and fight!"

No one moved.

"Fight, I said!"

The blond swordsman stepped in front of her, gazing down, the blank look never leaving his face. Clearly unimpressed.

"Come on. What's the matter?" she teased. "You're pretty scared of me, huh?"

Cloud rolled his eyes. "Uh…petrified."

She nodded, not noticing the sarcasm dripping from the words. "Hmm. Just as I thought. What do you expect with my skills? Good luck to you guys, too." Even though no one had said anything to that effect. "If you feel up to it, we can go another round. Later!" she chirped. She started walking away. Then she stopped. "I'm going to leave now. Really!" she called over her shoulder.

"Wait a second," Cloud said and the group sauntered over to the girl.

"What is it? You still have something for me?" she asked, twitching an eyebrow. "Oh, I get it. You want my help because I'm so good! You want me to go with you?"

Cloud nodded and I groaned, thinking the swordsman was a glutton for cruel and unusual punishment, wanting this girl in the group. But when it comes to apocalypses, I understood needing all the help you could get.

The girl preened and pretended to debate whether or not she wanted to help. Cloud and the girls started walking away without waiting for her.

"Wait!" she cried, chasing after them. "I haven't even told you my name! I'm Yuffie."

Funny way for someone to join up, but I was starting to see this group had a lot of similarities with the Scoobies. Somehow, they were all coming together through strange circumstances. Cloud and Tifa were childhood friends, just like Xander and Willow had been. Nanaki seemed quiet, wise, and kind, sort of like Giles. Yuffie was the boisterous and irritating kid, like Dawn had been at fifteen. Looking at the girl, she didn't look much older than that, anyway. I wasn't sure whom Aerith, Barret, or I myself were parallel to, but it wasn't really important.

Time sped up again for a while, longer that it ever had before. I just started seeing quick flashes. The team went to a town called Junon Harbor and found out that Rufus Shin-Ra was in the upper levels. Cloud snuck up and the group waited to hear from him. He came back a few hours later and helped the group sneak onto the President's ship, all of them dressed as soldiers or sailors so they wouldn't be caught.

Aerith and Yuffie were in the cargo hold, so that's all I could see. But when a report came over the loudspeaker that a suspicious character was onboard, they all regrouped on deck. When they realized they weren't the ones the crew was looking for, they came to the logical conclusion that Sephiroth might be somewhere on board and went to investigate. Back in the cargo hold, they found some soldiers and sailors dead and strewn about the floor like rag dolls. They entered a door that had previously been guarded and I got my first glimpse of Sephiroth.

He was a tall man with long silver hair and glowing green eyes. Not gray hair. Utterly silver. He was as intimidating as I had imagined him to be, but there was one thing I hadn't counted on and no one had bothered to mention. Sephiroth was beautiful. His skin was pale and flawless. He wore black leather pants and a kind of black leather overcoat with armored shoulders that buckled over his toned bare chest. I think I actually had to wipe the drool from my mouth. Sinfully delicious. I was ranking him up there in the top three most gorgeous guys I had ever seen in my life.

"Sephiroth!" Cloud cried out. "What are you doing?"

The man looked at Cloud in confusion. "Who are you?" he murmured, his deep voice rumbling forth. But he must not have been very concerned about the answer, as he swept forward and knocked the group to the ground as he flew from the room. Flew! Like a full on Darth Willow levitating thing!

But even though the Big Bad was gone, they weren't safe by a long shot. A monster calling itself Jenova BIRTH burst up from the floor and attacked. It was a horribly ugly and misshapen thing.

I saw the fight in fast forward speed but I could tell what was happening. They were definitely better than they had been the last time I had seen them and they totally kicked the thing's ass! If it even had one.

The ship docked in a town called Costa Del Sol. It was a resort type place straight out of Florida, nearest I could tell. They all decided to take a bit of time to rest so Cloud, Aerith, and Tifa headed down to the beach. And whom did they find lounging on a chair surrounded by girls in bikinis? Why, Professor Hojo, of course. And the sight of the pallid disgusting man surrounded by beautiful women turned my stomach.

Cloud walked over to him. "Hojo…what are you doing?"

The man looked at him snidely. "It should be obvious. I'm working on my tan."

"Answer me!" the blonde swordsman yelled.

"Hmm. I believe we're both after the same goal," the Professor remarked cryptically.

Cloud looked at him suspiciously. "You mean Sephiroth?" he ventured.

"Did you see him?" Hojo asked expectantly. When there was no response, he stood. "I see," he said laughing.

"What is it?" Cloud growled.

"Nothing. I just remember a certain hypothesis…haven't you ever had the feeling something is calling you?" the creepy man asked. "Or that you had to visit some place?"

"I'll go anywhere Sephiroth is," Cloud swore vehemently. "To beat him and put an end to all this."

Hojo nodded. "I see. This could be interesting. Were you in SOLDIER?" the man chuckled. "Would you like to be my guinea pig?"

Cloud fell back in a defensive pose, his hand instinctively on the hilt of his weapon.

"Oh, now what?" Hojo admonished. "Are you going to draw your sword?"

Tifa turned to him. "Stop Cloud! I know how you feel, but you mustn't."

"Why!" I screamed in vain at her. "He's one of the bad guys! This guy's a monster! Let Cloud run him through, or better yet, cut off his head so it will be over and done with! You know he's going to cause trouble and you'll have to deal with him later!"

But to my disappointment, he backed down, the mad Professor giggling the whole time.

In his mirth, he noticed Aerith. "Aren't you the Ancient?"

"I'm Aerith," she replied. "The least you can do is remember my name."

She went up a few respect points for that.

"I want you to tell me something Professor Hojo," she went on. "Is Jenova and Ancient? Is Sephiroth an Ancient? Do we all have the same blood?"

Hojo stared at her, his lips moving but no sound escaping. I wondered what he found so offensive or startling about her question that he couldn't even formulate a derogatory remark. He mumbled something about heading west, then sat back down and said no more. Regardless, it sounded like their course was set. West. And I was betting the nonsense I had just heard would make more sense later.

Another flash, another town. But not exactly a town so much as an amusement park. 'The Gold Saucer' the sign proclaimed cheerfully in fluorescent colors. I watched the group wander until they ran across…a cat, a cait sith, specifically, riding a large stuffed moogle. Airship déjà vu. The cuddly monstrosity wadded over and offered to read Cloud's fortune, introducing itself as Cait Sith.

Of all the damned obvious names! I could have guessed that one!

It claimed it could read fortunes, find missing people, or missing things. So, naturally, Cloud asked where Sephiroth was.

It went through a ridiculous dance and then handed Cloud a small piece of paper that issued from the stuffed moogle's mouth.

"Give in to the good will of others and something big'll happen after summer," Cloud read aloud. "Wait…what's this?"

"Huh?" the little cat said. "Let me try again."

It danced again.

"Be careful of forgetfulness. Your lucky color is…blue?" Cloud read. "Just forget it."

"Wait! One more time!" it cried.

"What you pursue will be yours. But you will lose something dear."

'That one's at least part true,' I thought to myself.

The fortune-telling cat was shocked. He told them he had never gotten a fortune like that before and needed to see what it lead to. And thus, another group member was found.

Time sped up again and we were entering a slightly singed and tangled looking forest. We had only gone a few steps down the path when voices could be heard coming towards us. Cloud, Tifa, and Aerith ducked down behind some bushes as Reno and the Turk with the shaved head came into sight and stopped.

"Hey, Rude," Reno said amiably. "Who do you like?"

Rude, unfortunate name, turned away from him.

"What are you getting so embarrassed about? Come on," the redhead prodded. "Who do you like?"

"Tifa," Rude replied quietly.

I looked over at the people behind the bushes. Cloud and Aerith were trying to stifle their snickers behind their hands. I really wasn't seeing the funny. Sure, Rude wasn't exactly on the same side, but come on! The man was masculine and attractive. Should be flattering. I glanced at Tifa. She was blushing profusely, but I thought I caught a smile in there. I looked back at the two Turks.

Reno was looking shocked. "That's a tough one. But poor Elena. She…you…"

"No," Rude said succinctly. "She likes Tseng."

The redhead chuckled. "I never knew that! But Tseng likes the Ancient."

The two girls were both quietly chuckling now. But it was Cloud's reaction that was cracking me up. It looked like someone had forced a whole lemon into his mouth and clamped his jaw down around it. Jealous much?

A cute blonde woman in a blue suit came up behind them. "They always do that. Talk about who they like or don't like," she said casually. "But Tseng is different."

I decided this must be Elena.

"Oh!" she cried out, like she'd just figured out whom it was she was talking to. She ran for her fellow Turks. "They're here!" she yelled when she reached them.

"Then its time," Reno said coolly, all business now. "Rude, don't go easy on them even though they're girls."

I wasn't sure if he was including Cloud in that statement, but it made me chuckle.

Elena took off to report to Tseng, leaving Reno and Rude staring down Cloud and the two girls he always seemed to choose as his group.

"It's been a while," Reno said, narrowing his eyes in obvious dislike.

"This is as far as you go," Rude told them.

Then they attacked.

It was the first time I had seen the Turks fight, and I was impressed. Reno used an Electro Mag Rod, a weapon I'd seen but never used. His thin lanky frame made me underestimate him at first, but he was faster and stronger than he looked, striking out at his three opponents without prejudice.

Rude, on the other hand, used his fists and feet, and he was good. Really good. I kinda hoped they didn't kill him just so I could get the chance to fight him at some point. He was quick and strong, landing stunning blows to both Cloud and Aerith, but I noticed he didn't even try to hit Tifa. From the look on her face as she ran up and punched him, once again without him countering, I knew she had noticed it as well.

After a rather long fight, Reno backed off. "We may be retreating," he called out, "but we're still victorious."

I laughed as I watched the two men run off. I understood now why Aerith was showing me this. Clearly the Turks were going to be opponents again before the journey was over. It was nice to be aware of their skills beforehand.

Tifa watched the retreat thoughtfully and then turned to Cloud. "Hey, something seems wrong. Like they knew we were coming."

Cloud nodded slowly. "They followed us…but there weren't any signs of it." his face fell. "That means…"

"That there's a Shin-Ra spy," Aerith concluded.

Cloud groaned and looked up at the sky. "I don't even want to think there's a spy. I trust everyone."

I felt for him. No one wanted to believe that one of the people they were traveling with, someone that was fighting alongside them, a friend that was trusted to watch the backs of the other members, was a spy. One of the bad guys. It obviously wasn't Cloud, Tifa, or Aerith. It could be Barret, but he really hated Shin-Ra and that kind of passionate dislike was too hard to fake. It could have been Nanaki. They had found him in the Shin-Ra building after all, but that didn't ring true. That left Yuffie or Cait Sith. But my speculation would have to wait.

The next thing I knew, we were standing in front of a ruined reactor. A helicopter landed just beyond the remains of twisted metal and two people got out. Tseng and a blonde woman in a red dress and spiked heels. She looked very out of place, shoes wobbling along the dirt trail.

"It's Scarlet," Cloud whispered. "Head of Shin-Ra Weapon Development." He pulled the two girls around the corner of the reactor. "I don't think they've seen us yet. Better hide, just in case." They all crouched down behind a metal outcropping and listened.

I, of course, had no such restrictions and stood out in plain sight, had I really existed, to watch.

Tseng and Scarlet stood in front of the mangled reactor. The woman looked in a hole in the side that I could only guess led to the reactor core.

"Hmph!" Scarlet whined. "This isn't any good either. You only get junky materia from junky reactors. This one's a failure. What I'm looking for is a big, huge, large materia. You seen any?" she asked Tseng.

Now, I was almost sure after watching the group fight and talk and flashes of them shopping, that I knew what materia was. They were brightly colored spheres that looked like they would fit in the palm of my hand. And, nearest I could tell, that was how magic worked in this world. That was something I had found in my travels, that magic was unique to each world. Here, there seemed to be a sphere for every spell. Ice. Fire. There was even one of those balls that seemed to cure wounds. So this Scarlet chick wanted a bigger than normal sized materia. Made me wonder, just what spell would that cast?

"No," Tseng answered her in his cultured baritone. "I haven't seen it. I'll get on it right away."

"Please do," Scarlet ordered snootily. "We could make the ultimate weapon if only we had some."

"Well, shit. Yep, taking a stand and saying that's a bad plan," I muttered.

A flash and we were in a house with two middle-aged people. They wanted to know if Cloud knew their son, Zack. He had been a SOLDIER first class just like the blonde had been. Both Tifa and Aerith looked pained and left the house.

Cloud followed, going after Tifa first, much to Aerith's dismay and as I had to stay near her, I took a look at the town. In it's day, it might have been bustling, but the reactor blowing had clearly cleaned the place out. I wondered what it was called, and decided it probably didn't matter.

Before long, Cloud stood before the flower girl. She told him Zack had been her first love and five years prior, he had gone out on a job and never come back. She was convinced that he had found someone else. I had the sneaky suspicion she was projecting her feelings of her lost boyfriend onto the first convenient man that was similar to him.

And that was all. I had to wonder at the significance of this memory. And, as much as it killed me, I was just going to have to trust that all of this would come together and Aerith wasn't feeding me pointless memories just to be irritating. But then again, I didn't know her. Maybe she was like that.

Then we were somewhere else. A beautiful settlement built into a canyon. It had an aboriginal feel, like that of a Native American place. I like it immediately.

"I am home!" Nanaki cried, running up from behind us. He took off through the town full tilt, leaving everyone else at the entrance.

"Welcome to Cosmo Canyon!" a cheery man called out to Cloud's group as they approached. "People from all over the world gather here to seek the Study of Planet Life."

Cloud ran to where Nanaki was excitedly waiting on the stairs carved into the rock. "This is my hometown," he told them. "My tribe was protectors of those who appreciate this beautiful canyon and the Planet. My brave mother fought and died here, but my cowardly father left her. I am the last of my race."

"Cowardly father?" Cloud asked confused.
"Yes," Nanaki said nodding. "My father was a wastrel. And so the mission I inherited from my ancestors is to protect this place. My journey ends here.

"Hey Nanaki," came a voice from higher up in the settlement.

Nanaki turned, a huge grin on his feline face. "Coming Grandpa!" And he took off up the canyon.

Well, I knew his journey didn't end because he had been there on the airship when I had shown up. I couldn't help but wonder what had happened to change is mind, but on the other hand, I felt this might be a private revelation that I shouldn't be privy to. How were all these people going to react when they found out I knew so much about them when they didn't even know my name? But there wasn't anything I could do about it. I was sure I was going to be stuck until I saw everything that Aerith wanted me to see. I had no choice but to follow.

Cloud and his team went to the topmost house and found Nanaki with an aged man.

"This is my grandfather, Bugenhagen," the creature told them. "He is incredible. He knows everything." Clearly the man had adopted Nanaki.

"I hear that you looked after Nanaki a bit," the man said, gratitude shining in his eyes as he looked over the top of his glasses. "He is still a child, you see."

"Please stop, grandfather," the lion requested calmly. "I'm 48."

Bugen laughed. "Nanaki's tribe has incredible longevity. So you see, his forty-eight years would only be equivalent to say…that of a fifteen of sixteen year old in human reckoning."

"Fifteen or sixteen!?" Cloud exclaimed in shock. I was right there with him on that one. He was the same age as Yuffie and no one would ever suspect that!

"He's quiet and very deep. Yo thought he was an adult?" Bugen asked, his voice laced with amusement.

"Grandfather," Nanaki said softly. "I want to be an adult. I want to grow up and protect the village."

Bugen shook his head. "No," he said firmly. "You are not ready to stand on your own yet. To do that now would only destroy you in the long run.

The man was right. I don't think there's a person alive that understands that sentiment more than I do. From the time Merrick approached me on the steps of Hemry High to now, I had known things, learned things, done things that no young girl should have even been exposed to. While I learned about monsters and death, all the vestiges of my childhood, my innocence rotted away. And, in a very real way, it had destroyed me. Sometimes, long ago, I had wondered what kind of woman I would have been. Would I have married? Had children? Would I have been happy? It doesn't matter anymore. But I wanted to call out to Nanaki then. To tell him not to be in such a hurry to grow up because once he did, he would mourn for his lost youth.

"Reaching up into the heavens, threatening to snatch the very stars from the great city of Midgar," Bugen was saying. You've seen it, haven't you?" He shook his head. "Well, that's a bad example. Looking up too much makes you loose perspective." He considered his words for a moment. "When it's time for this Planet to die, you'll understand that you know nothing."

Truer words were never spoken. I was 122 years old and I didn't know shit.

"When the Planet dies?" Cloud asked.

Bugen nodded. "It may be tomorrow, or a hundred years from now, but it's not far off."

"How do you know this anyway?" the blond swordsman questioned.

"I hear the cries of the Planet," the old man said simply.

A sound filled the room that was almost like radio static, but slightly more melodic.

Cloud looked around in confusion. "What is that?"

"The sound of the stars in the heavens. While this goes on, planets are born and die."

Okay, on my wig-o-meter, this hit a 73. I remember Willow telling me that everything in the world was interconnected, but I was not exactly prepared to think of stars and planets as sentient beings that cried or made any kind of noise.

Then there was a mournful cry that almost sounded like a whale. "And what was that?" Cloud asked nervously.

"That was a scream from this Planet. Didn't you hear it? As it to say 'I hurt...I suffer.'" The man had his eyes shut and his head tilted back as he listened.

"They have come here on a journey to save the Planet," Nanaki told his grandfather. "Why don't you show them your apparatus?"

Bugen looked excited at the prospect of someone working to save the Planet and agreed to show them. He led them upstairs into a room with a domed ceiling. That reminded me of a planetarium.

He shut off the lights and they all stepped onto a mechanized platform that rose up close to the ceiling. Planets, stars, and solar systems were all visible in 3D around us and I wondered idly if my Earth was somewhere in the room.

"This is my laboratory," Bugen said proudly. "All the workings of space are entered into this 3D Holographic System."

They watched a shooting star around the room and I speculated absentmindedly about whether or not wishes made on fake shooting stars counted for anything.

"Let's get on with it," the old man said and I sat down on the platform to listen. I had a feeling I was going to learn something important, and since this was my world now too, I intended to absorb.

"Eventually, all humans die. What happens to them after they die?" he asked.

Well, I knew what had happened in my old world, but I had no clue what happened in this one.

"The body decomposes and returns to the Planet. That much everyone knows. But what about the consciousness, their hearts and their souls?" He waited for an answer, but I guess nobody knew, so he went on. "The soul too returns to the Planet and not only those of humans, but everything on this Planet. The spirits that return to the Planet merge with one another. They roam, converge, and divide becoming a swell called the 'Lifestream.'"

Interesting. Weird, but definitely interesting. Lifestream. In other words, a path of energy of the souls roaming the Planet. Odd.

"Spirit Energy," Bugen continued. "A new life…children are blessed with Spirit Energy and are brought into the world. Then the time comes when they die and once again return to the Planet."

"It's the Circle of Life!" I warbled, intentionally off key, and then blushed profusely as I realized that Aerith, real world dead Aerith, not memory Aerith, could most likely hear me.

"Of course there are exceptions," Bugen was saying, "but this is the way of the world."

Then a Planet that could only be the one we were on came into close up view. There was a little 3D man standing on the surface, but then he erupted into little yellow sparkles. Death maybe? The sparkles traveled down to the other side of the Planet and then a tiny baby could be seen. It aged and the whole process was repeated until the Planet was covered in minute points of glowing light.

"Spirit Energy makes all things possible. Trees, birds, and humans. Not just living things, but Spirit Energy makes it possible for Planets to be Plants. What happens if all the Spirit Energy were to disappear?"

The lights all drained from the holographic Planet. It tuned black and cracked apart.

"These are the Basics of the Study of Planet Life," Bugen finished.

"So if the Spirit Energy is lost, our Planet is destroyed…" Cloud said slowly.

Genius, that one. Some drink from the fountain of knowledge. Clearly, he had only gargled.

Bugen nodded. "Spirit Energy is efficient because it exists in nature. When it is extracted and manufactures, it can't accomplish its true purpose."

"You're talking about mako energy, right?" Cloud asked.

"Everyday mako reactors sick up Spirit Energy, diminishing it. Spirit Energy gets compressed in the reactors and processed into mako energy. All living things are being used up and thrown away. In other words, mako energy will destroy the Planet."

So we we're fighting Shin-Ra, Shin-Ra's reactors, Hojo, the Turks, Jenova, and Sephiroth? And here was I thinking this was going to be hard. Luckily, my dance card was free.

Everyone left the machine, a lot weighing on their minds. The whole team gathered at the bonfire at the center of the town, talking quietly with one another. Nanaki spoke at length about how he couldn't forgive his father for running from the town, from his mother, from him when the Gi tribe attacked.

Bugen came down, overheard, and told him there was something he needed to see. He led Cloud, Nanaki, and Aerith to a metal door set in the side of the canyon. He called what lay beyond The Gi Caves.

And as I watched them fight their way through the cave, I was itching to jump in and start taking monsters out. Not for the first time, I wondered what was happening to my actual body. How much time had passed in the real world because I felt like I had been in memory land for at least a week.

When they got to an opening at the back of the cave, Bugen stopped them. "During the attack, a warrior went through this cave all alone, fighting attackers off one after another."

"Grandpa," Nanaki said softly. "That warrior…"

"We're almost there," Bugen said, and walked through the opening, the others trailing along behind him.

We walked out into the night on an outcropping of rocks and saw the warrior that had fought the Gi. The one that had prevented them from taking even one step into Cosmo Canyon. The warrior, Seto. Nanaki's father.

Far above us, silhouetted in the light from the moon, was a lion, stone now, his feline face a twisted grimace of pain. I could see at least six arrows firmly imbedded into his hide.

"Seto continued to fight the Gi tribe here, to protect his canyon. Even their poisonous arrows had turned his body to stone, even after they all ran away, Seto continued to protect us. And he continues to protect us even now," Bugen gently informed his grandson.

"Even now…" Nanaki repeated numbly.

"You thought that he was a coward and ran away. But he alone risked his life to protect Cosmo Canyon," the old man finished.

He asked Cloud and Aerith to give them a few moments alone and as they left, me in tow, I chanced a look back at the young lion and knew he had just been forced to grow up a little, his illusions torn from him like discarded wrapping paper and he was left cold in the truth. It doesn't matter what your illusions are, we cling to them because they are safe and they are all we know.

The group came together around the bonfire again, preparing to leave. As they reached the edge of town, Nanaki came bounding after them.

"Wait for me!" he cried. "I'm coming too!"

I got what I wanted, I suppose. I had wanted to know what had changed his mind and it played out before me like the god damned Young and the Restless. But the voyeurism was seriously making me sick. It wasn't my place to see these things and somehow I felt like I had betrayed someone I had never truly met.