A/N: Howdy everyone! sorry it has taken me so long to update. this has been a very difficult chapter to write, hence the delay in updating. i should point out that I am a nurse, which obviously influences the way with which I deal with Naya's mental health. I am also sorry this chapter is so short, but I promise more is coming, sooner rather than later. just a reminder that this is a flashback; Heather is remembering the last time she saw Naya in such a state of disarray. She is still with Jenna having brunch when these memories come rushing back to her. thanks to those of you who have decided to follow and even favorite this story. it means the world to me and i am beyond honored. please feel free to offer any kind of constructive criticism. also, i guess i feel the need to explain WHY this is a RPF and not a Brittana FF. The reasons why I go there is because the bond of friendship between Naya and Heather just gives me soooo many feels. I agree that knowing they are besties in real life laid the groundwork for Brittany and Santana. They have so much chemistry together and a lot of that was borne from knowing each on such a deep and personal level. I feel like this way, i get to have my cake and eat it too! I can write about HeYa & Brittana. Obviously, I do not own GLEE and I unfortunately do not know Naya and Heather on a personal level; this is all from my mind. And away we go...

Heather ran out of the hospital until she was outside, the California sun streaming down. She couldn't stop crying until she felt a pair of arms wrap around her. She looked down and saw caramel colored arm tug around her waist. She quickly turned around and saw Yolanda crying too. After a while, Yolanda led her to a bench and they sat there, trying to absorb what was happening.

Naya has done this before?

Yes, Heather. About 5 years ago, she was here. We all thought she was better. She got the help she needed. I never thought we would have to be back here again. Can you tell me what happened, Heather?

She blinked back tears as she wondered what she could tell Naya's mother. She simply states that she found Naya in the bathroom, cutting. Yolanda closed her eyes, as if she knew what that image looked like.

That was how I found her, too, Heather. I walked in on her cutting herself. I just felt so helpless. I didn't know why she was doing it.

Heather didn't know why she was doing it either. Was it because of Mark? Or was it because of what they had done? Or, even more heartbreaking to the blonde, what they had professed to each other?

Naya was in her bed, lost in her thoughts.

How could you be so stupid, Rivera. Now, Heather probably thinks this is all of her fault. It finally happened, the thing you've wanted most in this world. And there you go and ruin it, as always.

Dr. Limjoco enters the room and just watches she as begin to cry again.

Naya, I know that you don't want to talk, least of all to me, but I am here for you. I want to help you. I know that you mother and your friend and are very concerned for you. Let us help you.

I don't deserve your help, Naya muttered under her breath. I just fucked it all up. And now, she is never going to understand.

Jamie walked up to Naya and looked her deep in the eyes before she undid one of her restraints. She took a seat next to the bed and let Naya continue.

She won't get it. Fuck, I don't even know what came over me. I thought that I was done with all of this, Doc. It just came out of nowhere; the urge to cut. I mean I was upset that Mark cheated on me, but thru that, I found out that Heather loved me too. The woman I have loved for so long told me that she loved me and I go and do this? What is she going to think?

Heather sat on the bench while Yolanda went to go and get them coffee. She didn't know what to think. One minute, they were making love, declaring their love for one another, the next, she walking in on Naya cutting herself. She needed to talk to her and to try and understand what was going on.

Jamie knew Naya. She had been treating her on-and-off for the past 6 years. She knew when to push the Latina and when to back off. She learned the spoken and unspoken language of Naya. She knew that at that exact moment, Naya needed to hear what she was thinking; to give her professional, expert opinion.

Now, Naya. Slow down, okay. We can figure this out together, right? Take a deep breath. C'mon. You don't want me to sedate you, do you? Or to reapply the restraint I just took off? She knew that those were the last things her patient would want. In giving her these two options, it would force Naya to stop and just breathe.

Naya took a couple of deep breaths in and out, closing her eyes, trying to calm herself down.

Good, Naya. Okay, so why don't we start with what you last remember? Take your time. There is no rush.

Well, umm. The last thing I remember was... I was sitting on top of my toliet seat. I had just finished off the last of the Goose. It felt hot as it slid down my throat. It felt good, but not as good as what I was about to do. She closed her eyes, trying to replay the scene. I took the razor and said to myself, 'This is the last time, Snix. The last time I let you win.' I took the blade and resolved to make the last cut- on my upper right thigh. I did it so slowly, to savor it- to feel the edge slice my skin...

Ohhhhh fuck.

It's okay, Naya. Keep going...

No, Jamie. It's not okay. She walked in on me. Heather. She saw me. She saw me cutting. FUCK. oh my god. oh my god.

Dr. Limjoco could see Naya unspooling before her, like a ball of yarn unraveling to a single strand. She put her hand on top of Naya's forearm, to ground her back to reality.

Naya. Naya. Look at me. Yes, that did happen, yesterday.

Wait, I've been out a whole day?! she said incredulously.

Jamie simply nodded and continued. Heather called 911 and then she called your mom. Yolanda indicated to her that they should bring you here. Heather rode the ambulance over here with you and your mom met you here. They have been here since 0300. When you got here, you were still unconscious. Once we found no physical cause for your state, we bandaged your cuts and admitted you here. I told them it would be best to just let you wake up when you were ready. You have not received any extra sedatives, I promise. I know how much you hate them.

Naya took a sharp intake of breath as she absorbed everything Jamie had said, filling in the gaps in her mind that had brought her from the happiest moment in her life to her apparent worst.

Just at that moment, there was a knock on the door. Jaime got up and to answer it as Naya kept rewinding and pressing play on the instant she was caught red-handed by the blue-eyed blonde she loved.

She didn't want Naya to see Heather yet, so she told her to go home, get some rest and come back tomorrow. As much as Heather didn't want to leave her, she didn't want to make things worse either. Jaimie told her that she could write Naya a note; she would make sure to give it to her.

Naya- The doctor thinks that it is best that I leave for the night. I don't want to do anything to upset you and, as much as I'd rather just be here, I think I should follow her advice. I promise to be back here first thing in the morning. Please believe when I say that I love you and I am not going anywhere. Pinky swear. -Heather