A/N: Sorry for the long wait. I'm 95% certain that the next chapter will be the last. Thank you to the people who have followed this one through, it's been a long journey. I hope you can hold on just that little bit longer, too.
Thank you to: Little-Firestar84, AngryLittlePrincess, lolly2222, MerriWyllow, Ciissa and Ebony10 for reviewing part eight.
x tromana
Part Nine
Lisbon had been wondering when Jane's suspension would actually kick in, but when she discovered that he had somehow managed to get it overturned prior to the PSU's investigation, she found herself seething. It wasn't just the fact that he had undermined her (yet again) at work, but he seemed insistent upon not giving her the space to breathe. And just as irritatingly, he still hadn't bothered to take the time to finish off his details in the forms for the court proceedings. She just could not understand what his reasoning behind delaying it was, never mind try and comprehend why he had had this sudden change of heart. All he was doing was causing her yet more grief and she knew it would be easier for the both of them if they just walked away from it.
She didn't have any hard feelings for him; his passion for his ex-wife had actually been quite the admirable trait in him. However, the fact it eclipsed their present, the here and now, had been the breaking point. If only he'd learned that he couldn't deal with Red John on his own, had trusted her to help him apprehend the serial killer, then maybe it wouldn't have had to end in this way. It wasn't the ending she envisaged for them, or even the best that she'd hoped for, but it had to be this way. Lisbon frowned as she concentrated on the road in front of her. Of course, her traitorous mind was arguing back, that she did still love him, and that he could be worth it. But a temporary reprieve which he seemed to be offering would never make up for the pain she'd already endured. She just didn't know if she could put her heart on the line again.
The drive to the hospital was mercifully brief. Lisbon knew that Cho was waiting impatiently for her, desperate to return home. It didn't take any of her team long to begin to suffer from cabin fever when trapped in a hospital bed. That was hardly surprising; nobody liked staying in such a place, even if it was for their own good and even if they had been injured on the job. But her team, they were all highly strung and dedicated individuals. It always seemed catastrophically worse for them to be consigned to bed rest.
She was glad that Cho was ready to come home. The past week or so had been tense and she knew that her second in command was getting irritable at the fact his discharge from hospital had been continually delayed.
"How are you doing?" she asked as she helped to ease him off the bed.
"Fine. Ready to go home. You?"
"Fine," she answered back shortly.
They were both lying and Lisbon knew it. Even so, she didn't bother to argue with Cho. Neither of them had the energy for that either. Instead, she knew that he would find her and talk to her as and when he was ready. There was no point in pushing somebody like Cho. If she did, then he would only close up more. They were two very similar people in that respect.
It wasn't long until she had Cho installed in his bedroom. He'd initially wanted to help her with cooking dinner, but she had been the more persistent of the two. Cho was still recovering from a major shooting and major surgery as a consequence. She wasn't going to let him risk injuring himself further. Besides, fussing over Cho – cooking included – gave her a much needed distraction from everything else that was going on in her life.
More importantly, it stopped her from thinking about Jane.
She smiled slightly when she saw Cho fast asleep. Instead of heading towards his bedside with the light meal she'd prepared for him, she slowly turned on her heels and attempted to creep out slowly. When he muttered something under his breath, Lisbon froze. She had half expected him to wake suddenly. A second later, he did just that.
"Lisbon."
"Hey, good to see you awake. I made dinner."
"Thanks," he replied and he smiled gratefully. "Where's yours?"
Lisbon glanced away. "I've already eaten."
"Right."
The tone in his voice suggested he didn't believe her, and rightly so. Lisbon was in no mood to eat and cooking had made her feel ill. She put it down to stress, but regardless of the cause, she wasn't about to force feed herself. Instead, she chose to focus on the task in hand and that was making sure that he did. He quietly thanked her again, and she slipped out of the room.
She still wasn't entirely sure what to do with herself.
Right now, all she felt like was a boat without a rudder, drifting and waiting to be caught once more.
xxx
Jane found himself staring up at Cho's house from his car.
Briefly, he saw Lisbon peek through the curtains and his heart skipped a beat at the very sight of her. So, she knew he was sitting there, knew he was waiting patiently, for something, anything really. However, she also hadn't bothered to come out and send him away. Jane knew that it was a bit pathetic of him to do this, but he also couldn't help it.
He just wished he could build up the confidence to go up to the door and knock on it.
If only he had the confidence to actually go and talk to her again.
Then again, it was difficult. At work, at least, he had a cause to go and speak to her. Outside of it, she simply didn't care unless he was going to update her on the divorce proceedings. The proceedings which he was putting all his energies into stopping.
He didn't want to divorce her. He wanted to prove to her just how much he loved her, and how much he needed her. Jane wanted to tell her that he had been foolish to not realize just how important she was to him prior to this. It had taken a near-death incident to reawaken the feelings that had lay latent within him. In a way, he had always loved her; he'd just been blinded by the love for his first wife to know just how deeply he felt. It had almost been his way of protecting himself from getting hurt again, if anything were to happen to her.
However, the problem was getting that message across to her.
Lisbon wasn't like other women. She was as stubborn as a mule and often, quite blinkered when it came to emotions. A few apologies, declarations of love and meaningful gifts would never be enough for her. In truth, considering his past behavior, it wouldn't have been enough for any woman. But he knew that that applied to Lisbon even more so. It was half what made her so alluring, but it also made her equally frustrating. Right now, Jane knew he could say anything and she still wouldn't believe him. What she needed was action, proof positive of his feelings and she needed it now.
The only problem was getting close enough to do that.
He sighed, drummed his fingers against the steering wheel and continued to stare pointedly at Cho's house. Jane wondered what they were doing together. Other people might have suspected that something illicit was going on, but not Jane. He had known them both for long enough to realize their relationship was strictly platonic. However, even that wasn't necessarily enough to stop his imagination from running riot. Jane could certainly imagine Cho having a deep discussion about Lisbon's relationship with him, insisting that it was for the best that she had asked for a divorce. He had never approved of Jane's treatment of her, after all. The only reason he hadn't intervened until now was because he'd never seen it as his place to say. Cho had very much sided with Lisbon on this issue, and justifiably so. Still, Jane hoped that Lisbon was silently thinking up counter-arguments to any statement he may or may not have made.
Of course, it was entirely plausible that they weren't talking at all. Cho could easily have been sleeping; drugged up to his eyeballs with painkillers. Jane felt the guilt rush through him yet again. Somebody he cared about was suffering because of him. At this moment, it seemed like everybody he cared about was hurting one way or another.
After another hour of staring, the same lights remained on in Cho's home. Lisbon hadn't glanced out of the curtains again and Jane was getting bored. Finally, he had the resolve to do what he thought he should have done hours ago. He stood up, locked up his car and strode straight to the house. Jane knocked smartly on the door three times and after two long minutes, Lisbon answered.
"What do you want, Jane?" she asked tiredly.
He glanced over her. She didn't look right. Concern immediately replaced any resolve he'd had to persuade her to give him another chance.
She definitely looked like she needed help.
xxx
When Jane didn't answer her question, she rolled her eyes. It was so typical of the man to come here just to annoy her. He knew that she didn't want to see him, and yet, he had conducted a stakeout outside of Cho's house for the past three hours. Any attempt at relaxing had gone out of the window. Instead, Lisbon had curled up in a ball on the couch and just hoped that sleep would eventually wash over her.
It didn't help that she had begun to feel a little under the weather. Not only had was she decidedly not feeling hungry, but nausea had made her feel significantly worse. Both her head and back ached, so she had put it down to being an oncoming migraine and treated it accordingly. The painkillers hadn't worked though, and now she had to face her irritating ex-husband again. All she wanted to do was return to the couch and hope that the pain would go away.
"I said, 'what do you want?'" she repeated, frustrated.
"What's wrong, Teresa?"
She took a step back and frowned. Jane took the opportunity to slip inside and close the door behind him. Lisbon sighed. She should have known that he would have taken any opportunity to come inside. Then again, it was her fault. She should have sent him away when she had first realized he was waiting outside at seven p.m. Then, he wouldn't have decided to come and disturb her for some unfathomable reason.
"I'm fine," she answered back automatically, but she knew he wouldn't believe her. Especially so when she considered the skills he had. He could read her like an open book. "Jane, I'm tired, I want to go to…"
Without warning, he placed a hand against her forehead and she flinched at the feeling. In a way, she knew she should have been grateful that he hadn't tried anything more inappropriate, like giving her a hug or kissing her. Even so, having him in such close proximity gave her mixed feelings. She had missed his gentle touch; she'd have been a fool to deny it. Equally, she didn't want him anywhere near her. However, she didn't have the energy to fight back. Not at the moment, anyway. Jane frowned in response and she could see just how worried she was.
"It's just a migraine; I'll be fine in the-"
"You're running a temperature."
"So?" she asked.
"Don't lie to me, Teresa, please. Just this once I need you to be completely honest with me," he spoke calmly and she opened her mouth with an angry retort, which he promptly cut off. "Now, what's wrong?"
"It's a migraine," she answered flatly.
"I'm not so sure about that."
He placed the same hand to her stomach abruptly and she winced as the pain shot through her. At that sign, she relented and told him precisely what was wrong. She described the pain in her lower back, the nausea, how she had almost vomited while preparing Cho's dinner and how she had felt increasingly worse over the space of three hours. Jane slowly helped her to sit down and Lisbon only felt a little relief at that. The concern on Jane's face had only increased as she described precisely how she felt. She had only seen him look that scared a few times before, and one of those was recent: when he hadn't known if it had been her or Cho who had been shot down.
"I think you need to see a doctor."
"Don't be ridiculous."
"Please?"
"What about Cho?"
"I'll call Van Pelt. She's lives nearby. But right now, your health is more important."
Lisbon considered his stance for just a second. She was partially tempted to tell Jane to go screw himself. However, she was feeling increasingly worse and he was speaking sense when he suggested medical attention. But then, the small voice in the back of her head was telling her that it was just a migraine, that she just had cramps and that it would all go away within a couple of days.
"Fine," she eventually muttered. "But only to prove to you that it's nothing."
TBC...
