CHAPTER TWO

..

He's eating lunch with Derek when it happens.

Derek's pager goes off and he stands immediately, and Mark is completely oblivious.

"Lexie's here," Derek says, and Mark knows what this means, because Lexie was told to go home three weeks ago and not come back until she was having contractions.

Plus, her due date was four days ago.

He only knows that because she's complained so much to Meredith that Meredith has unloaded on Derek, who in turn has fed scraps of their conversations to Mark.

It's like a twisted gossip tree.

"You coming?" Derek asks with a smile, because he knows the response before Mark even stands.

..

She doesn't page Meredith until things are actually progressing, because she doesn't want to distract her from actual work.

She's biting her lip through a contraction when Meredith arrives, her attention captured by the doctor.

"Who's this?" Meredith demands.

"Dr Johnstone," the woman introduces herself with a smile.

"You're having an intern deliver your baby?" Meredith verifies, incredulous.

"A resident," Lexie corrects. "Second year."

"Second year…" Meredith rolls her eyes.

"It's not like this is a high risk pregnancy. Everything is going fine, and if there were to be a complication…" Lexie drifts off, looking to Dr Johnstone to continue.

"Dr Cannon is on standby," she assures them with a confident smile.

Meredith sighs, conceding, but pulling the chair from the corner of the room closer to the bed and taking a seat.

"What are you doing?" Lexie asks, confused.

"Someone has to make sure she doesn't drop my niece on her head," Meredith responds, shooting a pleasant yet threatening smile at the doctor, who smiles back shakily.

..

She hasn't allowed herself to feel sorry for herself, or wish that she had someone by her side for the last nine months. She has been strong and independent and she wouldn't let anyone convince her that she needed a man to have this baby.

Now, she's regretting it, because she's having contractions, and they hurt, because she was stupid enough to refuse an epidural, and Meredith is with her, but it really isn't the same.

She doesn't squeeze Meredith's hand because Meredith doesn't deserve the pain. Meredith is being a good, supportive sister, but this is the moment when she really wishes she had someone else, someone who was really going through this with her.

She isn't desperate enough to want Scott with her, though.

That's the one thing that keeps her mind off the pain. Given the option, doing this alone (with Meredith) or with Scott, she'd really rather be alone.

So she squeezes the sheets as another contraction hits, ignoring Meredith's offer of a hand to hold.

..

Scott was a mistake made due to a few too many drinks and a stomach full of jealousy after seeing Mark with Derek's sister.

He was there, and he wasn't looking at her like she was crazy, and he was saying nice things, even if she knew they were all lies aimed at charming her into bed.

Alex had blown her off, and Mark clearly didn't want her.

But Scott did, and she couldn't bring herself to care that he only wanted her for the night.

..

Her father shows up.

She left him a message that she hoped sounded disinterested and merely informative when she arrived at the hospital, leaving it up to him whether or not to come.

Apparently over the last few months he has come to terms with the idea of his supposedly most responsible daughter having a baby alone.

She doesn't want him in the room.

In a perfect world she'd have a supportive husband or boyfriend by her side, and her mother would be there, and this wouldn't hurt so much.

But it's not, and she asks him to wait outside, which he does, saying he'll wait with the others.

She doesn't know who the hell else cares enough to be waiting, because it really seems like a waste of time.

But they're being supportive, and it's kind of nice, really.

..

He didn't think this through.

Sitting in a waiting room with Derek and Thatcher Grey waiting for his ex-girlfriend and love of his life to give birth to someone else's kid is really not how he wants to spend an afternoon.

Except that he can't move for the life of him, because Lexie's having a baby, and he has to be here, even if he can't be in the room.

Thatcher's looking at him appraisingly, and he tries hard to ignore it, failing after a minute.

"What?"

"You and Lexie aren't…" he starts, and Derek smirks.

"We broke up," Mark says shortly, hoping to put an end to the conversation, and hopefully any future conversation, between himself and Thatcher Grey. He just wants to sit in silence and wait to hear that Lexie has had a healthy baby, so he can go.

"Right, okay," Thatcher says, looking to Derek who is still smirking. "Oh!"

Mark doesn't know what realisation he's having but thankfully he keeps it to himself.

..

He's staring at the wall, trying to ignore the awkwardness of being left alone with Thatcher Grey because Derek had to check on a patient when Callie walks past.

"Torres!" He calls, desperate for any form of a distraction, and she stops in her tracks, turning to him.

"I heard Lexie's here?" She asks, and Mark nods. "What are you doing out here?"

"I'm-" he trails off when he realises he doesn't have an answer.

"You should be in there. Have you even seen her?"

The look on his face answers her question, and she rolls her eyes.

"Nine months ago you were wanting to propose. What the hell is wrong with you that you won't go hold her hand?"

He can feel Thatcher's eyes on him without even turning his head, and clearly Callie doesn't realise that it's Lexie's father occupying the seat to his left, which makes this conversation even more painful.

"You want a kid, you want a family, and you want Lexie. It really isn't difficult," she continues.

When he doesn't respond she sighs, muttering "you're an idiot," before walking away.

He's well aware of how much of an idiot he is.

He wants Lexie, and he wants a family.

But it isn't just the two of them anymore; there's a baby in the picture now – or at least there will be within an hour – and he knows he can't be selfish. He knows he can't be blinded by his love for Lexie; he has to be realistic.

No one ever wanted him to be a father to their child.

Not Addison, not Sloan, so why would Lexie be any different?

..

After twelve hours of labour she's exhausted, and Meredith's cutting the umbilical cord and generally telling the OB resident what to do.

It would be humorous if she wasn't so tired and desperate to see her daughter.

Meredith is the one to hand her the baby, and she's struck by how real this is, that she's a mother, to this perfect baby girl, and she honestly has no clue how she's going to do it without messing everything up.

Meredith wants to know the name, and she wants to know where this excited, supportive sister came from.

She's never been more grateful.

"Paige Susan. Paige Susan Grey," she says decisively, because out of all the names, it's the only one that fits the baby in her arms.

Meredith smiles, and the OB nurse takes her to be measured and weighed and cleaned up, and she can tell Meredith wants to go and tell Derek that everything's okay.

"Go," she allows with a smile, as she watches Meredith leave.

She doesn't know how it's possible, because she only saw her for a few moments, but she aches for her daughter.

..

Meredith shouldn't be surprised to see Mark Sloan sitting beside Derek and Thatcher, but she is.

"Healthy baby girl," she announces, and they break into grins at the news. "She's getting cleaned up now."

"How's Lexie?" Mark asks, and she shares a bemused look with Derek before answering.

"She's good. Great."

..

He leaves when they go in to see Lexie, mumbling an excuse about a patient that he knows Derek and Meredith don't believe.

He's on his way to the elevator, he is, but he can't help himself; he makes a detour.

Lexie's daughter is beautiful.

As if she could be anything else.

She has a tiny nose and a perfect mouth and a few strands of dark hair. It takes him a few minutes to tear his eyes away from her, and he only does so because a nurse is getting ready to move her, presumably to take her to Lexie.

The moment he sees her he knows he's going to love the child, and the idea doesn't even scare him.

..

"Mark was here," Thatcher informs her, as she tries to look unaffected by the knowledge. "Waited for two hours to make sure everything was okay."

Derek snickers and she glares at him.

"But he left?" She confirms and Thatcher nods.

"Had a patient to check on," he explains.

"Right."

..

It's strange, not seeing her around the hospital.

He hasn't exactly spent a lot of time with her over the last eight months, but he saw her. In the cafeteria, in the corridors, in the elevators.

Knowing he's not going to run into her is a whole different thing, and he doesn't like it.

He could always go visit her.

He knows where she lives; he knows she's on maternity leave and most likely spending a lot of time at home.

Every time he gets to her building he can't make himself go in.

..

She gets twelve weeks maternity leave, which would be great, except that it's unpaid.

So she's back at the hospital at ten weeks, standing outside the day care with a severe case of separation anxiety.

The carers are nice, and responsible, and she knows Paige will be fine, but she's spent the last two and a half months barely leaving her alone, and the idea of leaving her with these strangers for hours isn't comforting.

She's still standing outside the day care when Bailey passes her, holding Tuck's hand. She gives her a smile on the way in and a sympathetic look five minutes later when she's minus a son and headed to work.

"Lexie," she says, approaching her knowingly. "Rounds started fifteen minutes ago."

"I know," she responds, because she does. She's been standing, rooted to the spot for half an hour, watching time pass on her watch, while holding a sleeping, peacefully ignorant baby.

"Here," Bailey gestures, holding out her arms. "Can I hold her?"

Lexie agrees reluctantly, watching as Bailey carefully takes Paige in her arms, her daughter never stirring once.

"Now, I'm going to walk in there, and you're going to follow me. Paige is going to have a nice day with Tara and Sue, and you are going to get your butt to the locker room and start doing your job."

Somehow she manages to express the motivating speech in a soft tone, which doesn't disturb Paige.

Lexie simply nods dumbly in response, following Bailey into the day care.

..

She spends the day on Derek's service, trying desperately to ignore the fact that she has a daughter downstairs who has probably woken up by now.

"Lexie," Derek's voice snaps her out of her thoughts, as she regurgitates medical knowledge like Lexipedia the robot.

Derek praises her and asks her to scrub in, but she knows how long the procedure will take, and she also knows that technically she's off at eight.

She opens her mouth a few times before responding. "Maybe Matlby would like the opportunity?" She says instead, turning to the intern beside her who nods enthusiastically.

"Fine."

Derek leaves looking pissed, and she really doesn't know why. It's her decision, and yes she's missing out on seeing a rare procedure, and yes, he's going to be stuck with a practically incompetent intern, but she has other priorities now, and while Matlby can take over in the OR, she's the only one who is going to pick up Paige from day care and take her home.

..

She's charting.

Charting because she passed on an unbelievably cool surgery, and pissed off her brother in law/boss at the same time.

He could have at least pretended to be understanding.

"You're a surgeon. I know you're a mother too, but when you're here you're a surgeon. You cannot pass on every opportunity to learn because you have to pick up Paige, or you're going to get to the end of your residency and have learnt nothing, and then it will have all been for nothing."

His words are on repeat, taunting her, refusing to leave her alone.

She knows he has a point.

She still hates it.

..

He doesn't know when it became appropriate for Derek to complain about Lexie to him, but Derek doesn't seem to see the problem.

"She's distracted, she's exhausted… She can't continue like this."

"Cut her some slack," Mark offers as advice, reluctant to continue the conversation.

"She's too stubborn for her own good."

"Have you just met her? This is Lexie, she's always been this way."

He has loved it about her since she showed up at his hotel room and demanded that he teach her, only faltering once.

"Cut her some slack," he repeats, before standing and leaving the conversation behind.

..

He didn't dispute Derek's claims about Lexie, but he doesn't realise just how bad it is until he finds her asleep in the gallery.

The small room is empty and she's sitting upright, her head drooped forward with her chin resting on her chest as she sleeps.

It doesn't look comfortable, and that only reinforces just how tired she must be.

"Lexie," he says softly, not wanting to scare her. "Lex," he repeats louder, having to resort to shaking her shoulder slightly.

She's awake and alert immediately, blinking rapidly.

"Crap," she mumbles, gaining her awareness of her surroundings. "What time is it?" She asks, even as she's looking to her own watch.

"Ten to seven," he responds.

"God," she's moving so quickly he can barely keep up. "I gotta go pick up Paige."

He places a hand on her arm, and it stills her immediately. "You okay, Lex?" He asks softly, and she nods rapidly.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I just have to get Paige before the day care closes."

She's gone before he can even think to suggest she slow down.


A/N:

Once again, thank you all for your support and reviews, they make my day :D