Title: Word of the Day v. FFIV
Author: Garnet Eyes
Archived: fanfiction. net, livejournal. com
Last Updated: 10 Jul 2011
Summary: 04 November 2000 edition.
Rating: T
Characters/Pairings: Cecil, Kain x Cecil x Rosa
Author Notes: ineffectual, adjective;
1. Not producing the proper effect; without effect; weak; useless; futile; unavailing.
Disclaimers: Final Fantasy IV is owned by Square-Enix and I in no way, shape, or form profit off of my writing. This is simply for my own pleasure, and may at any time be removed and/or modified as I see fit.

...

He was supposed to be a man about these things – he was a knight now, after all – but it wasn't particularly easy to separate himself. This was part of the reason why Cecil knew deep down that he would never be as good of a soldier as His Majesty deserved, why the dark knight knew he would never be the best of the best. On the battlefield, separating his thoughts and actions from his emotions was easy, but the young prince could never get rid of the emotions entirely. He always fell into a trap of jumbled feelings when he was free from his armor, always mixed up thoughts and feelings, and acted on the improper things.

As a dark knight, he was supposed to be emotionless no matter the circumstances. He was supposed to kill his heart to focus his mind, to act only through logic and nothing else. Although it shamed him, embarrassed him even more that he was afraid to admit to his benefactor just how abysmally he failed, Cecil knew that he would never be able to achieve that state of being that was required of the best dark knights. The young prince knew he could never be the best because his heart could not be killed, only suppressed. It was impossible because he loved, was in love, and his feelings were returned. His deepest secret was the truth of his closest friends, the highborn man and woman who had grown with him from childhood, who buoyed his heart above the darkness that otherwise threatened to consume him. His shame – and his salvation – was found in the embrace of a proud dragoon knight and a gentle white mage. And Cecil would never give that up, not even to become what was expected of him.