Disclaimer: Star Trek is not mine nor do I claim to own it. This is purely a work of fiction.

AN: So,yah as per mentioned in previous post. This is just part two of chapter one. Part three is actually the delving into the beginnings of our deeper plot as well as looking at one of the main focuses for this arch. :/ I may go through and figure a different way to do this because chapters, parts, and arches are confusing to say. Hopefully you all aren't lost. Really it should all still read easily. More for myself I suppose. Will also make more sense the further in we get : )

So yah. Post numeral two...stepping away from Jim and Spock for a moment to welcome Jim back to his ship.

AN: enjoy : D


The One I've Loved

Chapter One (Part two):

Jim found that teaching the class ever since his breakdown in the mess had left things slightly off quilter. It was as though no one knew how to react around him anymore. Finally, it seemed to get the best of him today as all the whispers floated around, and he wound up sending those who had still been brave enough to return for the lectures off on their own.

He walked the expanse of the ship twice…three times trying to re-familiarize himself with his old girl. It was strangely relaxing, but also utterly frustrating.

Word on this ship passed around like a gossip mill, and any he passed by would grow silent. Glances along with whispers seemed to follow him wherever he went. It was disheartening to feel so exposed when he had always been accustomed to walking proudly down these halls. It was the first time that Jim looked at the people who he had fought so hard for and wished perhaps that he had not returned.

The mood gone from frustrating to depressing almost too swiftly, and thus Jim found himself sitting alone at the back of the mess hall. An uneaten plate of food, pushed aside as he tapped uninterestedly at his pad.

XXXXXXXX

"Keptin?"

Jim's eyes lifted from the document he was looking over, more out of boredom than necessity (nothing was a necessity anymore when it came to Jim). He gave the young navigator a wilting smile before gazing back down at the pad.

"What can I do for you Pavel?"

Jim's voice was soft spoken and tired sounding, but it held no bitterness or harshness towards the young navigator.

"May I join you sir? I had nyet been expecting you to be here at zhis hour." Before Jim could even voice a response the navigator was taking a seat across from him.

Jim chuckled and lifted his gaze from the pad to meet with Chekov's once again. "Yes, well I have a tendency of going where I please. Today I just happened to wind up here." He gave a brief smile before noting that Chekov not only didn't have food but was sitting completely stalk still as if unsure what he was doing.

"Did Pike or Bones send you in here?" Jim questioned confused by the poor boy's posture.

"Ah. Nyet, no sir." Chekov shook his head and laughed uncomfortably, "I had been passing the mess to deliver an equation to one of ze engineers. Like I said, I had nyet expected to find you in here. I figured zhat I might as vell drop by to keep you company, sir."

"You can call me Jim, Chekov. Right now you technically out rank me." Jim chuckled and set his pad aside along with the forgotten meal, turning his attention more fully on the other.

"Aye, Sir. Though I will most likely forget. Anyvay, I cannot zhink of you as anyzhing lower. You are ze Jim Kirk." Chekov beamed, "You defeated Nero and zhen you took on ze entire Romulan race as vell as many other non-federation planets. You vill always be hero to me, Keptin."

Jim's smile was one of amusement as Chekov prattled over him. "Well I'd say that if we are looking at it that way I might as well start addressing you as Sir as well. You were right there with me in that fight against Nero and every step of the way with this last war. I would say you are quite the hero yourself, Sir."

"Nyet!" Chekov gasped out reaching forward as if trying to force the words back at Jim.

Jim laughed out at the action and leaned forward more amused and interested in the conversation now. "See Chekov. It's nice to be addressed by name. It allows me to show that you are more important to me than many others I know. That you are more than just a coworker. You're a friend. A dear one at that."

"T-thank you sir." Chekov flushed slightly at the kind words, and looked down at the table unsure what else to say.

"There you go again." Jim laughed out.

"Ah!" Chekov gasped out, "Nyet, I meant Jim. I meant to say thank you Jim. It's what I meant."

Jim's smile grew as he watched the boy fluster about for a few seconds before calming down enough to send a glare back over at Jim.

"You are doing zis on purpose, no?"

"Yes, Mr. Chekov. You caught me. I know you see me as more than just another coworker, and I don't mind however you address me. Your actions tend to speak louder than your words." Jim leaned over just enough to ruffle the boy's hair before settling back down. However, as soon as he was situated he barked out a laugh at Chekov's annoyed pout, "Alright I cave, what have I done this time?"

"Keptin, ever since you have returned you have become fond of messing up my hair. I do not understand vhy zhis iz so."

Chekov's pout lessened some as his concentration switched to fixing his practically unfixable hair. Jim watched him silently for a couple of breaths before realizing he was actually expected to reply.

"Habit I found myself picking up I suppose." Jim hummed gazing now away and looking at the practically empty mess. A couple of small groups still lingered here and there. Several members even daring to send curious glances towards Jim and Chekov now and again.

"You are speaking of your time spent here? Vhen you vere not really here but you vere. You vere young and went through many phases. From boy to older, yes?"

Jim gave Chekov a bemused look at such a sentence before nodding. "Got it in one Mr. Chekov."

"May I speak freely about zhat time or iz it still taboo topic?" Chekov looked almost guilty for even voicing the sentence but questions seemed to be overwhelming deep within his eyes.

"Go for it Chekov. If anything seems to be stepping too far from the comfort zone I'll try and let you know." Jim smiled though it was tight as he was unsure where this was going. Spock had said that him and Bones had kept much of Jim's darker moments secluded from the rest of the crew, but perhaps they were wrong.

Maybe some moments got by undetected or Jim let them slip. Did Chekov know? Did it matter if he did? Apparently he was still willing to sit alongside Jim, so if he did know anything it didn't deter him from remaining close. If he did, though, did he tell anyone else? Sulu, perhaps?

"How did you know zhat I vould be ze best one to find ze ship?"

Well that wasn't what he expected.

Jim laughed out warmly at this, and felt compelled to ruffle the kid's hair again; though managed to withhold for his benefit. However, his smile didn't lessen as he went on about how there wasn't really anyone better suited when he thought about it. He knew that Chekov would be able to not only find the ship but understand the meaning behind all the effort put to get him there. Chekov would look past just the act of finding something that wasn't there to find and recall how Jim had managed to get said objects invisible in the first place. Looking beyond the face value of things.

Jim found his once secluded time spent in the mess now filled with conversation about the events. Chekov wishing to exam every step of the years missed and Jim's time on board that last year. Chekov spoke with excitement and no longer dwelled on what was okay or not okay to talk about. All that mattered was the conversation and the company.

Chekov ended up running late for second shift and didn't even bother sending a guilty look as he was still too excited over their conversation. "Ve vill talk more later, yes?"

The phrase was spoken like a question, but Jim knew without a doubt that Chekov had every expectation to hunt him down again later.

Jim watched the other leave with amusement, today wasn't too bad a day after all.

XXXXXXXX

The week seemed to carry a similar pattern as Jim kept crossing paths with the alpha crew members.

Jim wasn't quite sure how it happened. He hadn't been planning on going to the gym or even working out at all, but Sulu had appeared and suddenly Jim was pulled along in desperate need for help.

First it was that Sulu couldn't find a partner to fence with, and Jim had just happened to be the first person he passed. Over the first two years on the ship Jim had amused Sulu's odd past time and had picked up meetings with the other to be shown the ropes where it came to fencing. So, Jim couldn't really bow out with the excuse of not knowing how.

This wound up being more than just a partner to practice with as Jim soon found them to be in a full out match. Sulu pushing Jim and Jim responding with ease as the two fought.

The idea of fencing still seemed to make Jim chuckle in amusement, but when the following day Sulu dragged him off at the same time he found them swapping from fencing swords to wooden katanas. He didn't even get a chance to protest as Sulu just drove right into the match.

Day after day Jim would find himself pulled along, and day after day he began to realize that more and more people began to sit in and watch.

Hell, one day Giotto had joined in and suddenly the battle was altered between skills versus strengths. It was amusing and quite the work out. It was also always a surprise who came out the victor. The medium seemed to really determine who won out in the end but often times one of the three would shock the others and pull out a win.

It soon became a training method, or outside class. Both Sulu and Jim not even stopping to disagree as the security team joined in or swapped in.

On some days Jim would sit out just to watch and comment on stance or procedures that could've been handled differently.

If Sulu happened to leave each lesson with a grin on his face or a sly nudge towards Giotto, well at least Jim was smiling and mingling effortlessly once again.

Chekov met up with Jim at least once if not multiple times throughout the week. He would specifically take up the largest amount of Jim's free time to talk smarts with him. It was amusing seeing as it started as Chekov prattling about Jim's capability to have planned out so many factors for the success of his time on the Enterprise.

It then turned into math equations that the youth had stumbled upon and had been almost pitching out the air duct when it had managed to stump him.

Jim seemed disbelieving that anything could stump the boy wonder but amused the other with aiding in the problems. From there Chekov would find a time or something else and spring on Jim to pick at his brain or to talk. It was amusing to watch, and often Jim would find Chekov sitting in on the competitions or lessons with Sulu. He would always cheer them both on, but Jim knew the younger male would always root for Sulu. He tried to get the other to join in but Chekov only refused bashfully muttering something about wrestling with Sulu and bad idea. Jim let it go.

He may have suspected the two, seeing as they were not very secretive in their relationship with one another. However, he knew that as long as it was never confirmed there was plausible deniability if any future problems arose.

Other than that he allowed the young navigator his slot in during the weeks. Letting it slid without comment when Chekov thought he was being so very crafty.

Nyota didn't really try to hide her visits. She had found Jim sitting in the observation deck late into the evening shifts and gave him a large part of her break for added company.

It started with Jim having been reading a book, one which happened to be in Vulcan and he knew from the moment her eyes lay on the book that he was about to get her involvement. He didn't even have to voice the matter of learning the language for a certain Vulcan, before Nyota immediately jumped in to test where his skill level was at.

Jim had always been a quick learner and had picked up the difficult language with ease. It helped that during the three months of shore leave he had lots of free time, and a Vulcan lover who not only spoke the language but had taught the language during his teaching years at Starfleet.

Nyota recommended books and brought many on her visit the next day—same time. Jim hadn't been asked to show again, but both of them seemed to understand that the request was there.

She never brought up the captaincy issue nor even approached the topic, and Jim remained thankful for this. She was, however, a strict and fiercely determined individual and Jim found himself avoiding her in the halls for if she would catch him it was like a pop quiz.

Later she found Jim was also fluent in a few traditional languages and they would spend part of the time swapping between languages trying to stumble or mess the other up.

Jim would laugh it off when once again Nyota would stump him by throwing Vulcan into the mix, but it aided greatly and when Jim spoke fluent sentences to his Vulcan, he knew that Nyota's persistence was worth it. The auburn eyes would light up in the smallest of ways but it was almost dazzling how quickly it would happen and shift the Vulcan's mood.

On one of Nyota's visits she had finally questioned Jim about some of the things he had trusted with her during the war. He tried to answer her questions, but similar to Chekov there really had never been any doubt. Jim knew that she was capable of accomplishing feats that others would've never even broached.

"You're stunning lieutenant. Even more so than just in appearances. You are and have always been impeccable at your job, and I have been lucky to have had you as a communications officer but also as a friend." Jim smiled as he caught her in a hug before she headed back to shift, "Lesek, Ko-kai."

-AN: Lesek: thank you, Ko-kai: sister-

Nyota left with a warm smile feeling closer than ever before with Jim. He truly was like an older brother to her; the older brother she never had.

Jim found himself too often spending his early mornings down in engineering. At first it was because as he had mentioned to Scotty, he had wished to aide with some of the less known or more 'secretive' projects.

Jim had always been fond of letting his chief engineer off on his own. More often than not this would wind up working in their favor and assisting in enhancing the Enterprise beyond just normal repairs. There were not many who cared as deeply for this ship as Jim had, but if there was any one who cared more deeply for it than that it would be Scotty.

It was a shared similarity between the two and perhaps part of the reason the pair got along so well. Scotty could speak engineer talk for hours and Jim was one of the few outside of the engineering track that could actually follow along. Jim was most definitely not an engineer so even he would get lost when Scotty really got into a certain conversation, but he was knowledgeable enough to fill in the gaps.

Something about the war had left Mr. Scott filing for certain repairs on board the ship. However, they were not regulation nor required so the federation dismissed the request.

Jim knew that his game as well as the war would've left a touch of hurt for the Scotsman because the controls were often placed in the hand of those up on the bridge. Those who needed to act fast.

Scotty's desire was to form a means to always keep communications between the bridge and engineering in case of such problems arising again. Being in a relationship with Nyota may have helped this process along, and yes Jim had managed to pick that up. No matter how sly the pair thought they were Jim was quick to catch oddities when it came to his crew-to his family.

Scotty also wanted to alter some other settings to better enhance speed and power conservation. Jim was all for this, and aided in ways they could accomplish such tasks without spending a nickel of the Federations.

If Scotty was humming a tune when he worked and a wee bit more understanding to the rest of the engineer crew, well who could blame him. He was fixing up his favorite old girl with a relished companion and working on projects that he had long thought had been tossed aside.

If Jim was not spending time being dragged around by his crew than he was with Spock. The Vulcan was still First Officer as well as Chief in the Science department. His time was often very tight and Jim was fine with the knowledge that the Vulcan always made sure the pair had meals together, but also that they're sleeping schedules lined up.

Jim informed him that it was not a big deal either way, that being on the same ship and meeting when they could was still better than being off ship.

Spock did not refute but he also did not alter his schedule. He merely stated that he would prefer to be beside Jim while he slept than alone.

Jim only smiled amusingly at such a declaration, and allowed the Vulcan his tricks.

He knew his crew was trying to make him feel at home once again, and he truly appreciated this as finally it seemed the nightmares were letting up if not vanishing altogether. The whispers faded away as many approached Jim with matters, seeing what the alpha crew was doing and mimicking what they saw.

...

...

Security crew members often spoke of the aide Jim gave while he was a teenager like it was something astonishing. They trained almost fervently and all seemed to show without question to the meets with Sulu and Giotto.

...

...

Engineer crew members grew accustomed to Jim showing up in the engine rooms and often sought him out. This was usually if Scotty was in one of his rants or too busy to stop and help them accomplish something that should've been easy (though easy for the Scotsman wasn't always the same for some of the newer cadets).

...

...

The science department watched as Chekov and Jim went over equations and different matters of logic or puzzles. They saw Jim answer many stumping questions with ease and when they realized that along with Spock and Jim were practically similar mindsets; they found approaching Jim was a sure way to find answers and please the strict Vulcan commander.

...

...

The command crew and the other departments had already been enamored with Jim, and had only been uncomfortable because they had not wished to offend their captain. Many of them had been present when he had initially collapsed in the mess, and were afraid he would think they thought less of him. It was foolish and as they watched him react normally within the following weeks they found themselves boldly jumping for his attention once more.

...

...

Jim had to admit, he was really beginning to feel like he was at home at last.


AN: Kind of more of an overall look rather than a singular moment. Hope that didn't seem too separate in comparison to my usual writing style. Wanted to accommodate for a vast amount of people and time frame. Plus just get a better mood going before I spring some stuff at you next post : )

Hope you enjoyed. Expect part three here soon. *Hearts*