Total Drama Cartoon Network

Episode 6 –

"Aftermath I: The Ice King's Poetic Justice"

(It's the first aftermath show, featuring everyone's favorite losers! To avoid a lot of reward challenges and filler episodes, I decided to stick four aftermaths in the Fanfiction, every six episodes. This one will feature Jake (21st place), Bubbles (20th place), and I.R. Baboon (19th place) who managed to make it past the first day. I think everyone is shocked. The Ice King is hosting, and it should be a riot. Please review).

"Joining us live from Cartoon Network Studios is the one and only Ice King!" a narrator says.

"Hey hey hey," Ice King says. "Welcome to the aftermath show! I'm your host this evening, or, if you are watching this from a recorded tape, then good afternoon, or morning, or noon, or midnight, or whatever time you are watching this at. The only reason why I'm hosting was because my audition tape was refused! Speaking of which, we're going to share three audition tapes from the contestants, eliminated or not. Bubbles, would you be a dear and roll in the TV?"

Bubbles rolls in a TV, and beside it are three tapes.

"Thanks, Bubbles. Anyway, the first we are going to watch is Cow and Chicken's. Funny story behind this, only Cow applied for the show. But, Chicken came into her room, and was going to tell her it was time for dinner. In fact, you can watch and see."

Cow and Chicken's Audition Tape –

Cow is setting up a camera in front of her. Beside her are all of her toys, including Crabs the Warthog and Piles the Beaver. "Oh, hello Chris McLean, mmm, I'm Cow! I'm part of the Cow and Chicken show, and I'm here to say why I'd be wonderful in this show! Let's see, I love my toys including Piles… the Beaver Doll! Oh, they are just so sweet! I also love giving my own milk to provide for the family! I love them so! Even though my parents are only halves, and do everything with their feet, I just think we are the most wonderful family ever! Oh, and there's my brother Chicken. Both of us are usually tormented by some guy named the Red Guy. Mmm, but with my strength and his smarts, we can do anything!" Cow starts hugging her udder, until Chicken comes in.

"Look, Cow, it's time for supper! Whats ya doin'?" Chicken says.

"Oh, big brother, I'm trying out for Total Drama Cartoon Network, where 'Cartoons old and new get the spotlight in an ultimate battle for a spin-off series'!"

"Oh, Cow, whats I'm gonna do with you? This show is so stupid, it's like how we were born from human parents. Now that's stupid."

"But it happened, big brother! Come on, you'd be perfect for this show!"

"Look, I heard that Chris McLean is a bigger sleazeball than Red Guy. Come on, Cow, it's time for dinner!"

"OK, but can you say one sentence for me?"

"What's dat?"

"Say 'I'd love to be on Total Drama and my name is Chicken'!"

"Fine, I'd love to be on Total Drama and my name is Chicken, now let's… wait a second, whats you doin' with dat tape?"

"Sending it to Chris so both of us can be on Total Drama!"

Chicken starts trying to grab the tape. "Gimme that tape, Cow!"

"Woops, I saved the video!"

"That's it, Piles the Beaver Doll get to meet my fists!"

"No!" The camera fuzzes.

End Audition Tape

"Yep, what a duo of losers! My audition was way better than that! Anyway, this guy has come from the Cul-de-sac, and man has he made an impression on everyone! He is stupid, smelly, and a giant nerd, unlike me of course. This is Ed."

Ed's Audition Tape –

"Hallo camera, how are you?" Ed doesn't get a response. "Fine, Mister Camera, meet your B-Movie doom!"

"Ed, please don't destroy the camera, Eddy and I haven't done our auditions yet. In fact, I'll hold the camera, and you just stand there and say why you'd be great for Total Drama. Places, people!" Edd says, checking off a list. Eddy brings in a giant sign that has the classic Cartoon Network logo on it.

"Hey, Sockhead, where do you want me to put this sign?" Eddy asks, only for the sign to crush him.

"Eddy, you can stick it behind Ed. Alright, I need Fred Flintstone, Scooby Doo, and the Jetsons to stand over next to Ed."

"What's with all the retro cartoons, anyway?" an irritated Eddy says.

"Because, Eddy, we want to show Ed's diverse appreciation."

"Is the camera rolling?" Ed asks.

"Be quiet, Ed!" Edd and Eddy say.

"Consider me for Total Drama, Chris! I am done!" Ed says, waving at the camera.

"What, you mean you needed us here for nothing! He's already done!" Fred says, and he, Scooby Doo, and the Jetsons walk away in irritation. "Wasted 4 hours just to get here!" he mutters.

Johnny Bravo shows up. "Sorry I'm late, Ed! I was doing a CCF reunion show with Dexter, Cow, Chicken, Numbah One. Why didn't you guys make it, I was dancing and…"

"Oh, Johnny, now you show up!" Edd says, slapping his forehead. "Ouch."

"Wait a second, Double D, what are we here for?" Eddy asks.

"Ed's audition, Eddy." Edd, Eddy, and Johnny Bravo look around and they don't see Ed anymore.

"Where the heck did Lumpy go?"

"Oh, yeah, he said that he finished his audition already," Johnny says.

Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck come with a Screw Ball sign and behind them are the other Looney Tunes in dancing uniforms. "Eh, what's up docs? Where's Ed. I thought we were going to shoot a tape," Bugs says. "I even brought an anvil and a parade of dancers. We came all the way from Warner Bros. to the AKA studios for nothing?"

"It turns out he's already done with his audition, and the directed masterpiece is ruined!" Edd says.

"I say I say this is ridiculous! I say we're out of here!" Foghorn Leghorn says, leading the rest of the Looney Tunes away with him. Bugs Bunny stays behind.

"That's the last time I ever follow a shifty poster that says 'Need Help at Cul-de-sac.' Seriously, what is that supposed to mean?" Bugs now leaves.

"Well, there goes all of our jawbreaker money," says Eddy. "So, wait, this was Ed's Audition tape?" Edd nods. "It sure doesn't feel like it."

End Tape

"Man, am I the only one who noticed how long these tapes are, seriously? Man, a lot of people have issues with length and timing. Mine was short, sweet, and to the point. I told Chris 'accept me or I'll freeze you in ice forever' and then cut the tape off. Is that really too hard to do? Seriously! Okay, fine, next up is one of my mortal enemies that I hate with a passion, Jake the dog!"

Jake's Audition Tape –

Jake is sipping tea, and reading a book. "Oh, good evening Chris," Jake says, trying to be fancy, "and welcome to the Treehouse. Let me show you a tour."

The camera cuts to Beemo. "This is my acquaintance, Beemo. I'm not sure if Beemo's a boy or a girl, so I'm just gonna call it an it."

The camera cuts to the Ice Kingdom. "And this is the Ice Kingdom, where Creepy McCreepy lives. Yeesh, the Ice King is one crazy dude."

The camera cuts to Finn, messing with his demon sword. "And this is my most formal acquaintance, Finn the human. Now, then, since we are done with this magnificent tour, I believe that you can accept me for my sophistication." Finn walks over with his arms crossed.

"Dude, you're not sophisticated!"

"Well I needed a gimmick to get Chris to like me, Finn!"

"What about the fact that you can stretch to more than 50 times your size?"

"Wow, that never came to my mind. Oh man, is this thing almost out of batter…" Jake is cut off by the camera shutting off.

End Tape

"Gee, being called Creepy McCreepy is making me very unenthused to announce the first guest. This guy was one player away from coming in ultimate last place loserdom. It's Jake the dog, who won't let me take any princesses for myself!"

Jake walks in, waving to everyone. "Hey all you Adventure Time fans! You know what I do before I shoot an episode?"

"Yeah, we don't care, Jake! Now take a seat."

Jake takes his seat, staring angrily at the Ice King. "You know, you don't have to be such a jerkface all the time!"

"Well yeah, how do you think I feel? No one gives me any respect!"

"That's because you snag princesses all the time!"

"You know what, I think your camera gave you red-eye! Haha! Defend yourself against that insult!"

"Is that all you got?"

"Yes. But, let's get this part-ay started! Woo-hoo! Since you got eliminated in a hamboning challenge, you get to challenge Mordecai and Rigby in a hamboning competition. The idea is called 'What You Suck At: The Game.' If you win, you get Tree Trunks' famous apple pie, but if you lose, you get a poisonous scorpion bite. Now, are we ready to rumble?"

"Yeah, we're about to cream that dog into the 16th century. Ooooooooh!" Rigby says, hi-fiving Mordecai.

"Alright, that's it!" Jake says, revealing he can stretch out more than ten hands at a time.

"Ready, set, go!" Ice King says, and they are off. Jake, of course, is winning by a landslide as his multiple hands are blowing everyone away. Soon, it was over, and Jake won. "Wow, I thought you sucked at that game."

"Nope, I'm a master at it, man. Just because I was eliminated in that episode doesn't mean that I suck at it."

"Oh, that makes a lot of sense. Here's your stupid apple pie." Tree Trunks walks in with an apple pie and gives it to Jake. "Oh well, I'm sure our next guest will suck at her objective, it's Bubbles the Powerpuff Girl!" Everyone claps as Bubbles flies in and takes her seat. "So, Bubbles, how did it feel to fail at life?"

"Oh, it's no trouble. I didn't help with the challenge, anyway, so I should've been voted off anyway. Also, I wish Buttercup and Blossom the best of luck!"

"How would you feel if you had to challenge someone in an actual Truth-or-Dare game?"

"I'd say no, because I still have the dark memory in my head."

"Oh, really? But you have to anyway! Hahahahaha! Joke's on you, loser!" The Ice King starts maniacally laughing. "OK, you have to play against Harold from the original cast!"

Harold walks in, getting cheers from everyone. "Gosh, I didn't know I was this popular. Wait, is that a person, or a circle with a rectangle on it?" Harold asks, pointing to Bubbles.

"She'll be your competition, you nerd! Alright, we'll start with Harold, and ask truth or dare?"

"Truth or dare?"

"Um, uh, truth?"

"Who is your favorite male contestant you competed with?"

"Um, I don't know. Since I was only on the island for four episodes, I'm just going to pick one by random. Hmm, Chicken?"

"Wow, so you like him?"

"I don't like him, Harold. I just couldn't come up with an answer. Well, okay, truth or dare?"

"Dare!"

"I dare you to say that Duncan is your best friend."

"Fine, Duncan is my best friend. That's totally untrue though. Okay, Bubbles, truth or dare?"

Bubbles, finally getting into the game again, is excited to answer. "Dare me!"

"I dare you to… knock out I.R. Baboon!"

"What? But what did he do?"

I.R. Baboon runs in. "Did someone say I.R.?"

While about to sit back down, Bubbles accidentally slaps I.R. in the face, knocking him out. "Woops, sorry."

"Since Bubbles refused the dare, anyway, she gets nothing. And, since Baboon is knocked out cold, we need to pass the time, somehow. So, here is 'Poems with Ice King.' Oh, and if you complain, I'll freeze you in a block of ice forever! Okay, let's start. Ahem…

There once was a ham from Argentina

Whose name was Argentina

He couldn't laugh

'Cause I cut off his half

And he still is in Argentina

…and that was my first limerick of many. Next, I'm going to do a couplet. Ahem…

I hate you all

In the fall

…that's my favorite one. Now cheer, suckers! Or else I'm gonna zap you!" Everyone in the audience cheers as loud as they can, and Jake and Bubbles look at each other.

"This has to stop, we can't just let this audience full of fans be frozen in fear from this nutjob!" Jake whispers.

"What are we going to do?"

"We have to beat him up, thoroughly!"

"OK, here's another one. Ahem…

Ice is white, and my mountains are blue

I am a jerk, and so are you

…Yeah! I made up that one all by myself! " the Ice King says proudly.

"Hey Ice King! Stop putting fear into everyone's lives with your stupid poems, or you're gonna get pounded!" Jake says, next to Bubbles, who looks angry.

"No one messes with innocent people while there's a Powerpuff around!" Bubbles says, giggling afterwards at how tough she sounded.

"Oh really, well my face isn't red, but you'll be dead! Aahhh!" The Ice King shoots freezing lasers at the two of them. They run behind the Aftermath curtains. "Come back out here please so I can kill you!"

"Remember, just punch him until his black soul of a heart can't take it anymore!" Jake says.

"That's it, hostages, er, I mean people of the audience, get Bubbles and Jake before I freeze you!" Everyone starts screaming, and people start looking. "No one calls my poems stupid! They are a piece of art! Zap zap zap!"

"Hi-yah!" Jake says, and he's stretching his foot down, kicking Ice King in the face.

"Ouch, ouch, ouch! Dude, cut it out!" Bubbles swoops down, also whacking him in the face. "Why does everyone like to beat me up? No wait, I get it, you're bullying me! All everyone does is, ow, bully me! I'm not gonna let a couple of bullies keep me from my passion! Ahem…

I am the Ice King, ouch!

I am a fragile man, yee-how!

I just want to be a poet

But no one is a fan, geez stop!

I know I am a jerk

But I know I'm awesome!

So stop kicking me in my face

Because you froze would be a disgrace!

…Yeah! That's right! Poems! Poems! Who wants another?"

I.R. Baboon finally wakes up. "I are awake! I are ready to be introduced!" Unfortunately, Bubbles kicks him in the face by mistake, knocking him out again.

"Thanks, Bubbles," Jake says sarcastically, "we almost had it!"

"Sorry, Jake, it was an accident!"

"Wow, to fill the 30 minute time-slot, I get to read even more poems! Ahem…

Wow oh my, Wow oh my

I hit myself with a pie

Gee oh gee, gee oh gee

Princesses like to kiss me

Hee hee ha! Hee hee ha!

La de la de da

Rock off socks, rock off socks

I like to play with red blocks!

Gunter oh Gunter, Gunter oh Gunter

You don't have any fur!

… See, was that really that stupid?" Everyone boos and throws objects at him, only to cower back in fear. "That's it! Calling my poems stupid is one thing, but throwing things, really? I'll have to, umph!" Bubbles hits him in the back of the head, knocking him out.

The audience cheers. "Good job, Bubbles. You knocking everyone out actually saved the show!"

"Oh, and look, Baboon is waking up!" Bubbles says, and Baboon is getting up.

"I are ready to win!" Baboon says, jumping around. "Ooh, I are make fire!" Baboon does his simple fire making technique, despite Jake and Bubbles trying to stop him. A giant fire is lit, and all of a sudden, the place catches on fire. Everyone runs around in panic, and Jake takes the Ice King out, and the show has ended.

Sorry for another short chapter, it's just that I got kind of bored with this one. Next chapter will be longer, and will probably be the most shocking one yet.

Who do you think will be eliminated next?