"Mrs. Chambers and Miss Hill are absolutely delighted about the upcoming opening of my tearoom. The other day they just kept rattling on and on about the same, and apparently, the ladies in their church committee are as pleased. Needless to say, that is a relief, and I can hope that our little business will…"
Amanda's voice died down when she noticed her words were falling on deaf ears. Sitting comfortably on the best armchair in her living room, Teaspoon had his unfocused eyes on her. The expression of his vacant gaze clearly showed that his mind was miles away from the room.
"Teaspoon?"
Her voice startled him, and he had to overcome a sudden fit of coughs before he was able to speak up. "Uh… what were you sayin', my dear?"
Amanda did not reply right away, but simply cast a sad smile in his direction. "You were thinking about Louise and her outburst today, weren't you?"
Teaspoon stretched his lips, his face shaping into a wry expression and answered her question. "How can I not think about it?"
Amanda nodded, and pulled her chair closer to him. Resting her elbows on her lap, she leaned forward and fixed her dark eyes into his as she said, "Teaspoon, I know how fond you are of her, but let me speak my mind and tell you her behavior today was an outrage! Ruining your birthday like that! No wonder none of us felt much like celebrating afterwards!"
"Lou… she didn't act right, I grant you that, but… I'm worried. She has an incensed character, but she's also very affable and good-natured. Lou doesn't fly off the handle for anythin'. There must be a powerful reason why she's so miffed with me."
Amanda raised her eyebrows, conveying her skepticism. "She's evidently an ungrateful minx."
"Amanda…"
"It's the truth, Teaspoon. After all you've done for her and her family, she should be kissing the ground you walk on!"
"When you love somebody, you give yourself for free, not because you expect any kind of reward. Not that I'm sayin' Lou, Kid, and their lovely children haven't given me more than I could have dreamed of throughout the years."
"She's nothing but a selfish piece!" Amanda continued her angry tirade, outraged on behalf of the marshal. "She owes you everything she has now. Who looked after those boys of hers when she was at death's door? Who has given her support all through the years? And most importantly, who let her keep the job at the Pony Express even when you discovered she was a woman? If you had kicked her out like any other boss would have done, who knows where she would be right now? She could well have ended up in the gutter, serving and treating men who are lower than scum!"
At her words Teaspoon shuddered as horrible images filled his mind. Shaking his head to get rid of those haunting thoughts, he said, "Amanda, don't be so cruel, please. Lou is a very capable and resourceful woman, but even so, I don't think Kid and the others would have let me fire her back then."
"That's beside the point, Teaspoon! I hate it when somebody hurts you, and that's what she did today! You don't deserve her haughtiness when you've been nothing but kind and generous to her and her family!"
"I also welcomed you with open arms when you first came to me, and you connived to rob and kill me!" Teaspoon blurted out before his own mind registered what he was saying.
Amanda's mouth hung open in shock and her black eyes stared at him as if she had been slapped. "Do you still hold a grudge against me because of what happened years ago?"
Teaspoon shook his head. "No, and forgive me for bringin' that matter up. It was uncalled for. You know I forgave you and forgot about it the moment you and I talked, and you confessed the truth. I was more than obvious about it," he said, hinting at the small fortune he had decided to share with Amanda when she had left Sweetwater. "What I mean is that you can't go judgin' Lou like that. I already told you. Lou was wrong today, but she's been a constant presence in my life for years. If I helped her once, she's given me a dozen times as much ever since. Thanks to her and her family, I feel I belong to somebody for once instead of bein' a lonely, old man."
"You could have come to live with me. I've been asking you for years."
"And it was very generous of your part, honestly, dear. But Lou never asked me to accommodate to her life; she simply adjusted hers and her family's to mine."
Amanda pursed her lips in an unhappy expression. "That's something I can't compete against, I see."
"There's nothin' to compete against, Amanda." Teaspoon could not stand this continuous putdown any longer, and he was too tired to keep defending Lou against Amanda. The day had been hard, and he had enough on his plate after Lou's resolve to rub him out of her life, and he just could not cope with Amanda on top of it all. "I… I better go," he muttered as he leapt to his feet.
"Please Teaspoon, no."
"It's late, and I need to rest."
Amanda finally nodded, and kissed him goodbye. The walk from Amanda's new quarters to Teaspoon's abode was barely a few minutes, and the marshal trudged inside. In the dark his hand felt for the box of matches atop his dresser, and lit the wick of a candle which cast some dim light in the room. Teaspoon sighed. Today he felt as if he were hundreds of years old, and his chest contracted with such emptiness that he had the impression he could hear an echo reverberate in his own self.
His feet shuffled along and approached the bed. Hours ago he had dropped by his rooms and left his birthday presents, which now stood on top of his roughly made bed. Teaspoon smiled sadly as once again he laid eyes on the drawings the children had given him. He picked them up and placed them in a drawer of his dresser. Then he did the same with Janey's shaving razor, Amanda's pocket watch, and Rachel's scarf and he hung the new hat he had gotten from Buck and Ellen on the peg next to his revolvers.
Alone on the bed over his threadbare bedspread lay Lou's present. It was still unopened and wrapped up in smooth Manila paper. After what had happened, Teaspoon had not been in the mood to celebrate, like Amanda had pointed out, or do anything else about his birthday. The marshal focused his eyes on the package. Lou had said it was a quilt, and had qualified it as 'nothing much'. Now tempted by curiosity, he ripped the paper open to discover it was really a quilt. Holding it by the corners, Teaspoon gave it a good shake and spread it out over his bed.
The colors stood out in the semi-dark room, and the marshal's eyes feasted on the different shapes as his hand stroked the fabric. It was a patchwork quilt, and as his sensitive fingers explored every inch of the different materials, his mind was flooded by memories as he recognized the patterns. Many of them came from some of the shirts and even jackets he had over the years, but he also found materials that in better times had been part of Lou's dresses or even Kid's shirts too. Teaspoon also spotted those fabrics that had been worn out by their children, and even the brown corduroy that he was sure Lou had donned during her Express days.
They all formed a lovely combination that embellished his rackety bed. It wasn't perfect, but in its flaws laid its beauty, but that wasn't its best asset. The memories contained in this simple piece of fabric pulled at his heart, and he was almost moved to tears. By looking at every inch of his new quilt he could bring to mind moments that were a treasure, like his history written before his eyes. Teaspoon wondered how Lou had been able to gather all these pieces of discarded clothes throughout the years. It felt like a beautiful act of love like a mother bird day by day picking twigs all through the long winter to create the perfect nest for its little ones. And Lou did not even like sewing, Teaspoon thought with a sad smile.
A sigh escaped his lips, and very slowly he started to undress. The pressure in his chest was not gone; he was feeling in a tumult, and couldn't shush away those categorical words Lou had uttered. That had hurt more than he was able to admit to anybody, especially Amanda. He couldn't simply accept that Lou… his Lou would become estranged for whatever the reason. She was a steady pillar in his life, special as nobody else was. Teaspoon was fond of all his boys, now grown men, but Lou had a place no one could fill, and he could not accept she would disappear like that.
Teaspoon slid into bed and buried himself under his new quilt. He could even smell those unmistakable aromas in Lou's home, and he could close his eyes to be transported there, surrounded by the McClouds. It was there that he felt like home, and had never doubted he belonged with them. The harmonious dream was slashed as Lou's words echoed in his mind. It hurt worse than any shot he had suffered in his eventful life, and unexpectedly, his eyes felt moist and the tears spilled over. It had been years since he had last cried, but tonight when he crossed the threshold of his seventieth year of life, he finally succumbed to his grief, and he wept for him and the woman he had suddenly realized he had loved most.
Beads of sweat glistened on their foreheads, and the material of their dresses clung to their skin, enclosing them like a stifling prison cell. Surrounded by wooden washtubs, the two women incessantly toiled their way on the pile of laundry that their families had built up in the last week. Ellen energetically scrubbed some sheets on the wash board while Lou stood over the steaming wash boiler, spinning some other bedding clothes with the dolly stick. The women did not talk; Ellen was humming an old tune while scrubbing while Lou seemed to be deep in thought.
Ellen was the first one to notice him resolutely directing his steps to where they were. As her humming stopped suddenly, Lou's attention was briefly diverted, and when she realized who was approaching her yard, her features hardened and she continued stirring and prodding at the clothes with even greater vigor.
"Hello, Teaspoon!" Ellen greeted him enthusiastically.
"Mornin', ladies!" the marshal responded politely, tilting his head at the same time.
Lou did not say a word and did not even move a muscle, keeping her back turned to Teaspoon. The lack of response wounded him deep in his heart, and his face showed his hurt as he kept staring at her turned figure. Ellen noticed the awkwardness, and felt the need to make herself scarce. "Uh… Teaspoon, will you excuse me for a bit? I need to fetch something from the house. Lou, honey, I'll be back in a minute."
Ellen almost ran out of the yard, leaving Teaspoon and Lou in the same awkward position. "Ain't you gonna say anythin' at all, Lou?" the marshal finally blurted out. "Is this the way it's gonna be from now on?"
Lou still did not talk, and simply transferred the washed bedding to the rinse tub. Then she spun around to face Teaspoon. Her eyes were downcast as she wiped her hands dry on her apron. "What do you want, Teaspoon?"
"Talk to ya."
Lou sighed. "What about?"
Teaspoon took a few guarded steps closer to her. "First, I want to thank you for your beautiful present, and how much I appreciate it. Rachel told me you spent long months to finish it."
Lou shrugged her shoulders. "You know I ain't very skilful, and I take months to do most things other women would manage to dance through."
The marshal cursed when he realized that Lou had taken his comment, intended as praise, as criticism. "I think you don't give yourself enough credit, Lou. You have a big family, and it's amazin' you were able to find the time to make this old geezer somethin' so exquisite. I've never owned such a special quilt."
"You're welcome," Lou replied, trying to remain dry and aloof, but his words and praise really meant the world to her. She felt unshed tears sting her eyes, but she fought them stubbornly, and tried to find a new direction to distract her sensitive soul. "Anythin' else? You see, I'm quite busy."
Lou made the attempt to turn to the clothes but Teaspoon reached for her, and thwarted her intentions. "That can wait, Lou. We still need to talk about our outstandin' matter. You have a problem… a big problem with me, and I think I have a right to know what it is."
"I…I'm just very sad, that's all," Lou said in a tiny voice, lowering her eyes to the ground. "I think I'm entitled to feel this way as you have a right to have your own feelings."
"Naturally, but we… I worry about you."
Lou lifted her head proudly as she stated, "You don't have to. I told you. I ain't your concern anymore. After all, you have your precious Amanda, don't you?"
Teaspoon's forehead crinkled into a frown as realization finally dawned on him. "Is… is all this fuss about Amanda?"
The way he uttered the question made her feel small and simple, and her irritation and pain soared. "Teaspoon, I ain't some kind of stone statue anybody can manhandle to their liking. I might be small and insignificant, but I have feelings!"
The marshal was bewildered and almost speechless. "Who on earth manhandled you, Lou?"
"No one," Lou admitted, "but that's the way it felt." Lou paused, and then added, "I heard you, Teaspoon, there in the stables."
"Heard what?"
"Amanda bitching about me! About me being such a pathetic, hideous hag that my own husband shouldn't even look at me! And you were there, listening to her as if she were talking about the weather!"
"Lou, what Amanda said was just atrocious, and I let her know right away. You must've heard me too!"
"No, I didn't. I only heard her and your silence!"
"Lou, I swear to God that I berated her words most energetically, and she apologized."
"Nobody apologized to me."
"Lou, she was wrong to say those untrue things about you and Kid, but she has had this bitter streak runnin' through her veins since her husband abandoned her. I'm not excusin' her, but it's nothin' personal against you. She tends to lunge against any woman who seems to be happily married. I guess she's still fightin' her demons in her own way." Lou nodded reluctantly, and as Teaspoon did not see her relax yet, he added, "What else, sweetheart? What's eatin' you inside?"
Lou bit her lower lip. "The thing at Tompkins'."
"What thing?"
"What you said," Lou reluctantly muttered. "You… you said Amanda was the closest thing to a daughter." Now that the cat was out of the bag, she felt her tongue loosen up and the words spill easily. "Call me an idiot, Teaspoon, but I thought… I thought that we… that you and I had something special, that we were as close as real family. My children even call you Grandpa, and… can you imagine how it hurt to hear you say that? It was like falling from my comfortable cloud to the hard ground."
Teaspoon dared to take her hand in his, and his rough thumb caressed her still moist knuckles. A sigh escaped his lips. "Lou, honey, it's true. I feel Amanda's the closest thing to a daughter." Lou looked back at him with such pain that it felt like a powerful punch to his already sore soul, and before he would sink deeper in mud with his clumsy mouth, he added, "The thing is that you, my girl, ain't closer or farther from that position. You're just it." Lou kept staring at him with a confused frown, and Teaspoon added, "In my head, my heart, and my understandin' you're my daughter full stop. God knows I never got closer to your mother or lay eyes on her, let alone a hand, but that's the way I see and feel it. I thought you knew that, Lou."
"Are you saying that to simply content me? I ain't a child, Teaspoon, and I can deal with the truth. I don't begrudge you for loving Amanda as you do, for wanting the whole word to know about her, but I… I just don't know."
"Lou, have I ever lied to ya?" Teaspoon asked in a serious voice. "Do you really believe I could tell you I loved you as if you were my flesh and blood, and bein' lyin' through my teeth?"
Lou lowered her eyes and suddenly burst out crying. Teaspoon promptly brought his arms around her as she silently wept against his chest. It was a few minutes before she could get a grip of herself and control her tears. With the back of her sleeve she wiped her eyes as she disengaged herself from his hold. "I'm sorry… so sorry, and I… I'm so ashamed, Teaspoon, but I was so jealous!"
"I've been neglectin' you recently if you've been feelin' this way, haven't I?" Teaspoon muttered thoughtfully, and suddenly, he remembered something Lou had said the day before. "Is it true what Polly said about me… about my attention wanin' and shiftin'?"
"I don't know… It was not right to tell you that. I'm sorry, Teaspoon."
"No need to apologize, honey. I was also wrong here, and I should have been payin' more attention. This old fool sometimes takes for granted the people he loves, and then when I realize my faults, it's too late."
"Teaspoon, I should've been honest with you from the first. Like I've told you, I have nothing against you spending time with Amanda, but… but I also want a little bit for me."
"I promise this won't happen again, but if I ever slip, you'll let me know, won't you?"
Lou smiled a natural, not-forced smile for the first time in weeks. "Count on it. You know what I'm like… uncomfortably straight and honest."
Teaspoon squeezed her hand as he said, "And I wouldn't want you any other way." He paused and looking into her eyes, he added, "And never forget I love you, honey. You don't need to fight and compete for a little bit of my heart as you say because you have the deeds for a huge chunk already, a vast chunk indeed. You planted your stake there a long time ago, and nobody will ever evade you. Nobody."
Lou was lost for words, and felt her cheeks flush. Her easy tongue became inarticulate, and without a second thought she just threw herself to Teaspoon and hugged him tightly. Her mouth stretched into a smile, and still in his hold she asked, "Why don't you stay for lunch? It's been a while and we've missed you."
Teaspoon pulled away and grinned. "And since theoretically today's my official birthday, where else would I wish to spend it but with my family… my real family?"
"I thought you'd be helping Amanda in her tearoom…" Lou hedged.
"She'll understand why I'm here… why I need to be here." Teaspoon replied, emphasizing the words pointedly.
"Thanks, Teaspoon," Lou muttered, and in a silence she took his wrinkled hand in hers and squeezed it, conveying what this meant for her and how he had saved her miserable day. Everything was right now, and even though Amanda's presence still bothered her, she was content enough to blow away the black clouds and let the breeze inside. Teaspoon was right. She didn't have to compete, which was what Kid had also said. Maybe she could make an effort for Teaspoon's sake and try to have a cordial relationship with Amanda. She had nothing to be jealous about, and she could even end up seeing what Teaspoon clearly saw in the woman, couldn't she?
It had been a really warm day for the end of April. Lou would have welcomed the beautiful sun shining in the blue sky on any other day, but she had been toiling away all day long, sweltering and sweating uncomfortably. All the rooms in the house needed a good wash since Kid had changed one of their windows the day before. That mere task had meant that a layer of thick dust covered everything in her house. After dusting and washing everything scrupulously, Lou had to iron a huge pile of clothes she had put off for a few days. Naturally, apart from these extra chores, she also had to see to her every day routine, which included cooking, baking, more cleaning and washing, keeping a constant eye on Ginnie and her two boys, who were hardly ever on their own since she also had to look after Amanda's son and more often than not little Ike also joined the children. Today had to be also one of those days she had the four boys together, and Ginnie, who was an exceptionally easy-going baby, was irritable, crying and fussing too often.
Ginnie was contentedly playing with her rag doll while the boys were eating the snack Lou had prepared. It was quiet in the house for once, and Lou breathed out relieved when she finally put down the iron and left the last pressed garment on top of one of the neat piles in her basket.
As she carried the basket with her clean, ironed basket to the back room where she kept all her linen, she happened to have a look at her reflection in the mirror over her fireplace. Her face was flustered, her hair in disarray, wisps escaping her braid, and her forehead gleamed with sweat. Lou shook her head, amused at her own looks and relieved that apart from dinner, everything was done and she would be able to relax later if the children were merciful with her and behaved.
A repetitive rapping at the door welcomed her when she returned to the living room, and she knew that only Ellen knocked in that particular way. It wasn't only Ellen who was at the door, but Amanda stood next to her. "We came to relieve you from our two little terrors," Ellen announced, and Amanda smiled at her words.
Lou threw a look over her shoulder and saw the children still eating the sandwich she had previously prepared. Turning her eyes back to the women, she asked, "Shall we have some tea first? I could definitely do with a nice cup myself."
"Yes, good idea, Lou. We'd love some refreshment too, wouldn't we, Amanda?" Before the woman could reply, Ellen continued, "But let me invade your kitchen and make the tea. You've had enough work as it is, looking after all our kids."
Ellen scurried into the house, leaving Louise and Amanda in uncomfortable silence. It was a couple of weeks since the fiasco of Teaspoon's birthday, and Lou had not spoken with Amanda in all this time. Even though Amanda came to the ranch every day to drop and pick up Adrian, she and Lou had only exchanged a few civil words as Amanda was always in a hurry.
"Shall we sit on the porch? There's a nice breeze blowing right now," Lou suggested, and at Amanda's nod, the two women silently sauntered to the spacious porch, beautifully fringing the front of the house. Louise sat on the swing while Amanda sank down on one of the rocking chairs. They were still silent, and Lou felt the need to fill the awkwardness with words. "Uh… how's the tearoom doing?"
"Quite well, actually."
Lou nodded. "Teaspoon's told me it's a smart, little establishment," she continued. "Maybe I can talk Kid into taking me one of these days, but we're pretty busy, especially him. He and Buck are up to their necks in work at this time of the year. Or maybe I can go with Ellen or Rachel, but who's going to keep the children in line in the meantime? Naturally, I can also let them come with me, and…"
"Louise," Amanda called in a stern voice, and when Lou turned her attention to her, she added, "I've wanted to talk to you for a while, but… I guess I haven't had the guts to do so… till now."
"Talk about what?"
"You and me. I feel I owe you an apology," Amanda muttered sheepishly.
"An apology?"
"My son's delighted to spend time with you and your children. He's continuously prattling on and on about his days here. Our conversations are always filled with your children's names, even yours and your husband's. He says Jed is his very best friend, and I think he sees Matt as his hero."
Lou smiled and shook her head. "My Matt is a good boy, but for your own sanity, I hope Adrian doesn't try to imitate him too much," she joked.
"What I mean is… you've opened your house to my son unconditionally. I really appreciate what you're doing, Louise. Honestly."
Lou folded her arms, feeling shy and awkward. "Adrian is a charming little boy. He's no problem at all, and we're growing very fond of him."
"And I feel I haven't treated you right," Amanda added in a morose tone of voice. "I've judged you too harshly because I've always thought you had it too easy, that you got more than you deserved. I know it sounds mean, but I envy you."
Lou's first reaction was to send her a glacial look, but then she softened, realizing that she was judging the same acts she had been guilty of. "I appreciate your honesty. Life wasn't as easy as you think, if you want to know." Lou paused, seeing Amanda in a very different light. For the first time she didn't show herself as the untouchable, proud beauty Lou had always thought she was, but a woman with flaws and low feelings. "I've realized just now that we're both quite similar in many ways, Amanda. We both know what it means to be a lone woman surviving in a world ruled by men, and because of what that meant for us, we value our families above anything else, am I wrong?"
Amanda shifted her eyes and stared at the blank space in the distance. "I ain't sure, Louise. I've failed to give my son a real family. No wonder he prefers spending time here than with me."
"Amanda, please!" Lou exclaimed, feeling outraged on the woman's account. "Was it your fault Adrian's father was a scumbag?"
"When a marriage falls apart, both parts are equally guilty. It would be easy to blame George, and I did for a while, but I've learned to accept my own responsibility in our estrangement."
"What happens between a man and a woman is one thing, but a child is above that. I couldn't turn my back to my children even if I had to walk out of my marriage, could you, Amanda?"
"No, but…"
"There ain't buts here. The bond between children and parents is so strong that whoever decides to ignore it is either an egotist or has no heart. And who says you haven't given Adrian a family? Like Teaspoon says, family is more than blood relations, and I think now that you're here with us, Adrian has already a bunch of aunts, uncles and cousins, not to mention a very peculiar grandfather."
Amanda couldn't help but chortle amused. "I guess you're right." She paused, and after studying Lou's calm expression for a few seconds, she added, "You know, for someone who claims to hate my guts, you're awfully kind."
Lou shook her head. "I never said I hated you. I thought I didn't like you, but maybe I never made the effort to know you. Anyway, whether I like you or not, you're still family."
"Just because Teaspoon feels I'm family?"
"Yes," Lou replied honestly. "We don't get to choose our relatives, do we? And, well, we eventually get to accept and even grow fond of them, don't we? If you don't believe me, ask my sister's husband. He could tell you a thing or two about having 'me' in the family. We'll never see eye to eye. I think my little sister could have done much better, and he thinks I'm an unbearable busybody. Fortunately, we don't see each other very often, and when we do, we tolerate one another and I think I even grew to love him in a very particular way."
Amanda laughed, and behind all the verbosity and the anecdote, she was aware of what Lou meant, so there was only something she could say, "Thank you."
Later the women enjoyed the tea Ellen had prepared, and even Buck and Kid had joined them on the porch. Conversation flowed among the five adults while the children played in the front yard.
"Somebody's coming," Ellen announced as she spotted the black outline of a buckboard against the dangling sun.
Everybody turned their looks to the horizon, and when the wagon came closer, they all recognized its driver. Soon the voices of the children chorusing 'Grandpa Teaspoon' were heard as the marshal drove past them and stopped the carriage. It was no surprise to see Teaspoon on the ranch, but what was unusual was to see him in his Sunday best on a weekday. He only wore his suit on just the scarce occasions he performed or attended a wedding or a funeral.
In his usual flourished style, Teaspoon politely removed his hat and even made a bow, bending his upper body and swinging his hand to and fro. "Ladies and gentlemen."
"Teaspoon, what do you have on? Who's died?" Buck asked teasingly.
"Your sense of humor, son," the marshal replied in a mocked miffed tone. He was used to being the butt of teasing, and he always pretended to feel stung by the mockery when in fact, everybody knew he enjoyed it. "I came to see the ladies," he said, climbing the few steps to the porch and resting his back against the balustrade. He turned his whole attention as he asked, "Are you busy tonight?"
"Not particularly. Why?" Amanda asked.
"Mayor Perkins dropped by my office this morning to invite this old geezer to his house. His new wife is a city girl, and is used to hosting dinners or somethin' called soiree. You know, I ain't fond of those things, but the mayor insisted because he wants to talk to me about some important matter, and I had to relent. When he was leavin', he still noticed my reluctance and bellowed, 'Bring that pretty daughter of yours along if it makes you feel better."
Amanda smiled, and Lou's eyes lowered. She had told herself that she would never let herself be bothered by the close relationship between Teaspoon and Amanda. Like Kid said, there was never a competition for his love, but even so, her heart was unable to remain totally immune.
"That pretty daughter of yours?" Amanda echoed in surprise.
Teaspoon chuckled. "He hasn't been around too much, so I can only imagine that he thinks Lou's my daughter for real." At his words Louise's eyes darted to him and she felt Kid squeeze her hand meaningfully. "So since I'm sure Kid won't mind holdin' the fort in town while I'm hobnobbin' with the mayor…"
"Count on me, Teaspoon," Kid agreed with a smile.
"So, Amanda, I wonder if you'd terribly mind looking after Lou's children while she accompanies me to this bore."
Amanda's smile widened as she turned to Louise. "It'd be a pleasure to do it."
"But, Teaspoon, I can't … I can't. Look at me. I'm filthy," she stammered, sweeping her eyes over her ordinary clothes and self-consciously touching her messy hair. "Maybe Amanda or Ellen better go instead of me."
"I want you to come with me, nobody else," Teaspoon stated, looking into her eyes intently. "Go and doll yourself up if you want, and I'll be waitin' for you right here. I ain't going anywhere without you."
Lou's face lit up, and she felt as if she were a naïve teenage girl, flattered by the attentions of the boy she liked. Romantic love had not bothered her lately so much as the idea of losing the man she considered a father. She jumped to her feet, and lunged to Teaspoon, hugging him. "Thank you! Thank you!" she exclaimed and she still kept giggling and repeating the same as he skittered up the stairs towards her bedroom. It was obvious what Teaspoon had meant to do after their clash a couple of weeks ago. He wanted to show her what she was for him and his heart. Lou realized that she needed this; maybe it was silly and childish in a mother of four children, but who cared? Teaspoon was telling her she actually was as close as a real daughter could be, and that was what she might have wanted to hear from him since the moment she had met him all these years ago. Now she knew her place, and she felt she had everything her heart could wish for.
The End
