Wake up, look me in the eyes again
I need to feel your hand upon my face
Words can be like knives, they can cut you open
And the silence surrounds you and haunts you
I think I might have inhaled you
I can feel you behind my eyes
You've gotten into my bloodstream
I can feel you flowing in me
~ Stateless
Bloodstream
To his eyes alone the majestic façade of the old church loomed closer as Alec trudged slowly towards the Institute. Not that he cared. His body was on some kind of auto-pilot, simply repeating old and practiced movements that he had done a million times before. He had grown up here – a place that had always been home – and yet there was something about it that felt unmistakably foreign, perhaps unwelcoming, as his feet made their way up the dark stone steps.
Slipping into the building, it looked like its occupants were entirely asleep and Alec felt a wave of relief course through him. The last thing he wanted right now was to have to talk to someone. Pain and exhaustion were taking their toll on him and there was nothing that he would welcome more than the blissful oblivion of sleep. Maybe when he woke up tomorrow this would all be part of some terrible dream.
"I thought you were at Magnus' tonight."
The name made Alec flinch as Isabelle's disembodied voice rose from the far corner of the room where she lay sprawled out across one of the massive couches, her face illuminated by the glow of her laptop as red painted nails scrolled through an endless catalogue of designer dresses.
The fact that she was still up didn't really surprise him (she is dating a vampire after all) though he couldn't help wishing that she had gone to bed like any other decent person. He narrowed his eyes as he shrugged, his jaw tight as he eyed the floor. "I thought you were at Simon's."
Alerted by his mood, her dark eyes left the screen, taking in the dirt and the blood that remained mostly hidden by his jacket. "Turns out I'm not. And you look like shit. Have you been fighting?"
"Sort of."
"Then you could have called me," she complained, her eyes narrowing as she sensed a familiarity about him. She has seen that look before. Jocelyn had been wearing that expression for weeks when Sebastian has been missing and had almost killed Luke. The expression that said that all hope was lost.
"Something happen?"
"No." His blue eyes slid past her towards the floor. "Nothing happened."
She rolled her eyes. He had always been a terrible liar.
"Look, if you and Magnus had a fight I'm sure that-"
She turned towards him and paused as the words died in her throat. Through a fringe of black hair she could see the tears that were already streaming down his face.
"He never wants to see me again." The words were soft and cracked and broken and as soon as they left his lips Isabelle watched her brother crumble.
And suddenly it was just the two of them. Alec and Isabelle. Isabelle and Alec. And once again it felt like she was the older sibling as he took solace in her impregnable strength – hugging her, burying his face in her hair as the sobs consumed him while she gently coaxed the story out of him piece by piece.
This was good. He needed this. But not as much as he needed six feet and five inches of heat, tanned skin and black spiky hair. The pain of his loss was real and all consuming. His voice trembled as he whispered into her hair and suddenly it's like they were six years old again. The despair and agony in his blue eyes was raw and unadulterated and in that moment he could feel her love for him like a physical shield, rising up to protect what was fragile and shattered and broken. Like a living, breathing Mark of Cain, he thought, suddenly horrified at the idea that she would somehow see this whole thing as Magnus' fault. In fact that was almost somewhat guaranteed. She wouldn't be able to help it. Magnus wasn't family and for her family always came first. It was just who she was.
"By the Angel… what have I done?"
"Nothing any of us wouldn't have done," she replied, her lips pressed in a thin line.
A/N: Yes it's short but I write slow. I wonder if Izzy should go talk to Magnus… probably not.
Oh! And I had to update/edit my previous chapter so I suggest re-reading that one.
And I love reviews like Chairman Meow loves catnip.
