'Beep Beep Beep'

I put my hand out to quieten the awful buzzing that has brought me back from the world of make believe. It's Sunday, last day of freedom before I go back to work. I can't believe it has been five whole days since I've seen Jack, three since he stopped calling, he always was a proud son of a bitch, probably thinks that I am blowing everything out of proportion, and for all I know I might be. I think back to the last time we talked, well if you can call it talking, and realise that as far as specifics go I really don't know a whole lot. It's just every time I contemplate talking to him I want to run.
I really have to stop thinking about him, need to get in control of myself, I mean I'm going to be seeing him tomorrow, I'm a professional career driven woman not some love sick teenager. Aw but it still hurts. NO SAM, I must stop thinking like that. All I can say, or well think, is that it is a good job I'm spending the day with Janet and Cass. Thinking of, better get ready…

So here I am, an hour and a half later, waiting for either Janet or Cassie to open the door.
'Sam,' Cassie shouts as she flings open the door and flies at me to give me a big hug.
'Hey Honey' I smile down at her. She really has come out of her shell I can't help thinking of her as that little shy girl we rescued from Hanka.

'Hi. Are you alright? Where are we going? Can we go to the mall?'
'Cass, take a breath' I tell her a little too late as she has already ran off, presumably to get her mother. I walk in and close the door behind me.

'Hey Sam' Janet says as I walk into the living room.
'Hi. How are you?'
'Good. Well tired, been a busy week on base. SG3 came back from P5X 767 with a rather interesting fungal infection, a lot like athletes foot, only scabbier.' She smiles
'Sounds like fun, sorry I missed it' I laugh.
'How about you, what you been up to?'
'Oh you know sleeping, turns out I was really, really tired.'
'Who knew' she smiles at me with that doctor knows all smile on her face

'Um guys, we going or what?' Cass comes in the room asking impatiently, and I can't stop myself from smiling at the look on her face.
'So, where to?' I ask
'I think Cassie wants to go to the mall'
'You know Janet I got that impression too!'
'Just come on will ya's' Cassie calls as she walks towards the front door.

Thirty minutes later we had parked up and were just walking into the mall.

'So Cass, where do you want to go first?' I ask
'Well I need new clothes'
'You always *need* new clothes. You'd think I never bought you any'
'But mom, I've already worn them'
'And I've already washed them, they're good as new'
'Mom' Cassie whines. 'People have seen me in them'
'You're a school kid, not a movie star'
'Don't you want me to have any friends? Only dorks wear clothes more than once!'
'Far be it form me to turn my daughter into a dork, clothes shopping it is' Janet smirks as Cassie walks ahead leading us to one of her much desired clothes shops.

'I think I may have to pull some overtime' Janet smiles at me.
'I know, but we can't let her be a loner now can we' I smile back. 'So she's turned into a typical teenager then'
'Oh yes, just wait till you see what she picks out, bejeebs I would never have dared to ask my mom for anything like them.'
'I take it she never gets them then?'
'No, no definitely not'

'I think she went in this one' I say

We walk into a *trendy* clothes shop and see Cassie with a group of girls.

Janet, being Janet, walks up to her and starts acting the over protective mother, flattening her hair and putting on her best mother hen voice. 'Sweetie, are you going to introduce me to your little friends?'

Cassie looks angry as her friend start to giggle. 'Mom' leading her back towards me, 'Stop embarrassing me'

I can barely keep my face straight but I manage to say 'Janet, I don't think we're wanted anymore'

Janet turning towards Cassie makes a deal with her. 'You go shopping with your friends and me and Sam will meet you at the pictures in 2 hours, and you better have a smile on that moody excuse of a face of yours'

'Alright, but I need some money'

'Ah well since you asked so nicely how can I refuse?' Janet tells her with a smirk on her face. Handing over some much wanted cash she continues 'You get anything ridiculous, I will take it straight back and you won't be getting any new clothes for three months'

'K, k, see you later' Cassie replies over her shoulder as she walks back to her friends.

I turn to Janet and simply say 'Coffee shop' to which she smiles and we head off to the nearest caffeine outlet.

Ten minutes later we are both sat down, each with a large mug of steaming coffee and a generous serving of chocolate fudge cake in front of us. Now I am not normally a cake person but it just looked so tempting that I couldn't resist.

'So, looking forward to starting back tomorrow?' Janet asks me.

'Yea, I think I've had enough of staring at my four walls, you know, between sleeping sessions' I reply trying to keep my tone light.

'You still look a bit pale'

'Of course I do,' getting a large dollop of cake on the spoon ready. 'It's my skin tone' Smiling as I bring the spoon to my mouth and take my first bite. 'This is gorgeous!'

'Mmm' Janet agrees. 'But you know what I mean' the doctor in her not letting up.

'Yea' I smile. 'Trust me, it's nothing more than being cooped up under a mountain practically non stop for three months. Once I get a little sun I will be back to my normal healthy glow.'

'Ok, sorry to keep on at you, but you know me, I just can't seem to switch off the doctor thing'

I take another bite of my cake and then start a new conversation.

'So apart from SG 3's misfortunes, what else have I missed?'

'Usual really, Siler's been keeping me busy with the usual burns and breaks, SG 8 caused a little worry, ended up being 15 hours overdue for check in, but it turned out to be due to a freak weather storm. Seems P2X 163 is going through advanced climate change'

'Sounds interesting'

'Yea, had all the science geeks…'

'Hey'

'Sorry too much time around Colonel O'Neill'

'What?' I ask, letting the sound of his name affect me a little too much

'Oh, he didn't want any downtime so he's been on base all week catching up on all he's missed'

'Doesn't sound like him'

'I know, I guess that planet changed him. He has seemed rather subdued since he got back'

'Yea, well he had started a whole new life for himself there' I reply biting back the bitterness in my voice.

'Are you ok?'

'Yea, why?'

'Well' Janet says cautiously. 'I heard there was a woman'

'What's that got to do with me?' I ask a little bit quickly I know, but I can feel the tears starting to sting my eyes.

'It's just, when he was gone you seemed pretty determined to get him back, in fact you told me you missed him' She ventures, talking softly.

I strengthen my resolve and banish my tears before they start to fall. 'I did Janet, the same as I would have missed Daniel or Teal'c.' The lie tasting bitter in my mouth.

'It seemed a little more than that'

'Well it wasn't' I smile, trying to reassure her.

'Ok,' she says a little unsurely. 'I'm sorry for getting it so wrong'

'No I know you are just trying to help, it's just that it was nothing more than missing a friend, well a good friend.' These lies just keep coming, and I know she isn't really buying them, but at least I don't think she has any idea about what's really going on.

'Well if you're sure,' giving my a small smile

'I am Janet' I smile back at her

We carried on eating, drinking and making small talk until it was time to meet Cass. She wanted to see a romantic comedy, you know the sort, slushy, where the guy always gets the girl in the end. Not what I needed but like that mattered.

So here I am 2200 hours, crying over some stupid film I'd seen hours ago and dreading going to work the next day.