TW: Self mutilation


Take me out tonight,

Oh take me anywhere, I don't care,

I don't care, I don't care,

Driving in your car,

I never never want to go home,

Because I haven't got one

Fallon's fork slid into the crust of the fresh apple pie sitting in front of her. The fork hit against the stark white ceramic plate the dessert so tastefully sat on. There was a small scoop of vanilla ice cream beside it, but you couldn't tell because seconds before she had suffocated it and the slice of pie in whipped cream.

"Is that really necessary?" Isaac pointed his own fork at her plate, and lowered his eyebrow. She had made him go to Aunt Mae's diner with her, it was a Friday night and it was somewhat of a tradition for Fallon. The trip was usually made alone, but she didn't mind having Isaac accompany her just this once. They'd bonded over Aunt Mae's pie when they first met each other, so she thought it would be a good idea for the first time they hung out apart from school. They both were dressed casually, Isaac in a purple t shirt and dark jeans, and Fallon in a white, loose fitting, plush sweater and black jeans. A necklace with a lion head pendant dangled around her neck, and Isaac watched as it swung around and caught the light of the fluorescent bulbs hanging from the ceiling. She had been wearing it the day they met, and she never took it off.

"Yes, it is necessary," Fallon took a bite of her pie and scrunched her face as she did so. Another bite went into her mouth, this time consisting of nothing but whipped cream.

"Isaac, why the hell is there no whip cream on your pie? It's the best part!" She jumped up and down giddily in her seat as she reached her hand for the red tin can of Reddi Whip.

"Oh, no… Oh no, no… No, no!" A gust of air rushed out of Isaac's mouth as he sat back, defeated, watching Fallon almost murder his pie with whipped cream.

"You didn't have to do that," Isaac stated, giving Fallon a stern look. When he stuck his finger in his whipped cream, she stuck her tongue out at him.

"I think I did."


"So you killed her?" Fallon struggled to keep up with Scott and Stiles as they rushed through the doors of their school. Stiles had driven her to school, which meant she was stuck with both him and Scott until first period. Scott had been ranting about a dream where he went total wolfman and killed Allison in the school bus.

"What I don't understand is why you were dreaming about school? Of all the things…" Fallon spoke up for the first time on the matter, and Stiles pointed at her and nodded in agreement.

"That's not the point! I've never had a dream like that. I woke up all sweaty and panting," Scott stated and you could see the look of worry in his eye. His bottom lip was trembling, but Stiles had obviously failed to notice.

"Oh, I have, they usually end differently though." Fallon raised her tiny hand to slap Stiles chest.

"Please never give me that much information of you in bed again."

"Noted."

Fallon had somehow ended up walking beside Stiles, rather than lagging behind the two of them. When they rounded the corner, all three of them had stopped in their tracks. Their eyes widened and their jaws went slack, and Stiles desperately searched for Fallon's hand.


"I heard it was a cougar," Danny stated, looking at everybody seated at the table.

"I heard it was a mountain lion." Jackson rolled his eyes and folded his arms over his white cashmere sweater clad chest.

"A cougar is a mountain lion," Lydia retorted, but when Jackson gave her a confused look she quickly covered up her tracks, "Isn't it?" Lydia was a teenage genius prodigy, but because of Jackson's thick skull, he never realized just how smart she was. Lydia had said something about not wanting him to feel "inferior."

Fallon had sat with Lydia, Stiles, Scott, Jackson, and Danny at lunch today. It definitely was not on her list of things to do, but Stiles had nearly dropped to his knees and begged her, not wanting to have to put up with his longtime crush obsessing over her boyfriend or his longtime best friend completely enamored with his new girlfriend. She glanced over to the far side of the cafeteria, but didn't see any signs of Isaac, which was a bit bittersweet for her. On one hand, she was glad she didn't have to ditch him, and on the other, it meant she'd be alone in Mr. Harris' already unbearable class.

Allison was fine, much to Scott's relief, but it ended up that the bus driver was attacked inside of the bus late last night. It was nearly crushed in half, paint adorning the sides and windows. Scott didn't know what had happened, and spent the entire day fretting over whether or not he'd sent the poor old man to the ER. Honestly, Fallon couldn't stand anymore talk of what was happening around town. Fallon, Stiles, Scott, and Derek Hale seemed to be the only ones aware of why the hell everyone was dying.

Her ring decorated hand reached over to Danny's tray, picked a French fry from it, and popped it between her lip balm slathered lips.

"I'm outtie."

"Where are you going?" Stiles rose from his seat and called after her, and she shrugged in response. If she went to the nurse and complained about a migraine, she'd be sent home no questions asked. While her chronic headaches sucked the life out of her, they were an easy way out of situations she had no desire to be in. That included Chemistry without her partner she'd grown quite fond of, lycanthropy talk, and her third wheeling between Scott and Stiles. The nurse looked at her suspiciously when Fallon walked into her office, so she acted dizzy and fell against the doorway, clutching onto the metal frame and dropping her chin into her chest. Ms. Cooper gave her a pink slip, and slapped it into Fallon's hand.


Fallon was never one to take baths. You were just sitting in your own filthy water anyway, and taking a shower to wash away her troubles seemed much more appealing than letting them soak into your blood stream. But every once in a while, she'd take a bath. She liked to hold her head under water, and see how long she could hold her breath before her lungs caught fire and she was near suffocation. Her hair would float around her, like a crown of spilt chocolate, and miniscule bubbles would come out of her mouth. It relaxed her and terrified her at the same time. Once it became too much for her to bear, she gripped the cold sides of the tub and pulled herself up.

Her fingertips traced the horizontal scars along her thighs, silvery and pink and holding their own memories that flashed in her head each time she touched one.

"Worthless, worthless. You're worthless. You're nothing. Just do it. Get it over with." The sharp metal end of the blade slid across her skin, and she watched as crimson red rose to the surface. It dripped down her leg in singular drops, leaving a bloody trail in its wake.

"Worthless… so, goddamn, worthless." She kept telling herself this, she kept taking the blade to her skin. She couldn't stop. She couldn't. She deserved this. She deserved all of this.

To anybody else, they'd be invisible, unless she pointed right to them. But to her, they were so blatantly there and they haunted her with every move she made. She took the wash cloth floating around the water and scrubbed her thigh. She scrubbed and scrubbed, hoping the iridescent marks would come clean off and she'd open the drain and they'd float down it, and they'd finally leave her alone. Her skin was raw and pink, the fabric of the cloth burned, and she tasted saltwater against her lips. Her skin itched. It was if she was being eaten alive by bugs, gnawing at her skin, pulling on her hair. Her head rang with violent thoughts, the voice in her head telling her how pathetic she was because of this. No one could ever love such a damaged girl. No one.


Fallon's face lit up when she saw who was standing beside her. He twisted the knob on the lock, and swung open his locker, before speaking to her.

"Hello," Isaac smiled, cradling his binders and textbooks against his chest. There was a crescent moon shaped purple mark around his eye, starting at the end of his eyebrow and going to his cheekbone.

"Hey!" Fallon chirped, picking skin from her lip using her teeth.

"Ditch with me today?" Fallon looked hopeful, although she was honestly not expecting Isaac to give the answer he did.

"Sure." Fallon beamed at his answer, and took his book from his hands and shoved them into his locker.

"First rule of skipping class, never do it too often to preserve the amazing feeling of not being at school." Fallon hopped along the sidewalk, holding onto Isaac's forearm as she walked. The wind blew around them, swirling leaves around and pushing her hair back.

"There's rules to skipping school?" Fallon ignored him and continue going down the list.

"Rule number two, do something worth your time. Don't sleep all day."

"That is definitely not a rule," Isaac mumbled this, but it was loud enough for her to hear.

"Rule number three…"
"Rule number three is that you're a loser."

"No," Fallon wagged her finger in front of Isaac's face. "Rule number three: French fries." And just like that, Fallon and Isaac were sat in a tiny sandwich shop with a giant basket of fries between the two of them. Fallon would take two, sometimes three, fries at a time and dip them into ranch dressing.

"Still can't believe you dip your fries in ranch instead of ketchup," Isaac looked at her accusingly, while eating his ketchup dipped fries.

"Oh, give me a break, ketchup is boring, and it tastes like salt water." She took a sip of coke, and batted her eyelashes at him. Her favorite moments with Isaac were when they'd tease each other, and poke fun at each other's mannerisms. They both admired each other so much, really, but neither of them felt comfortable enough to let the other know. The closest they could get to sharing their adoration was playfully bullying each other.

"So what's next? We did fries and now we…" Isaac clasped his hands together and looked at her expectantly, wiggling his eyebrows.

"Now, we go to my house."


Her hands traced the spines of the DVDs stacked on her shelf, furrowing her brow and contemplating the best movie to watch. Ferris Bueller's Day Off seemed too cheesy.

"These vinyls are…"

"Super lame?" Fallon grinned, looking at Isaac as he shifted through her cardboard box full of vinyl records she had begun collecting when she was 12.

"Super cool! I mean, you have In the Aeroplane Over the Sea! And Dark Side of the Moon!" Isaac bounced on the balls of his feet as he flipped the Neutral Milk Hotel album to look at the back cover.

"Thanks," Fallon chewed on the inside of her cheek, "But can you please help me pick a movie?"

Isaac stumbled over to her and plopped onto the carpeted floor beside her. He looked on in concentration before pulling a movie out.

"Wise choice, mi amigo."


The two of them were all but five minutes into Rob Zombie's Halloween remake, before Fallon got up from her seat on the couch. She came back a few moments later with a large quilt in her hands, her fragile arms barely holding it up. She draped it over the two of them, and she sat next to Isaac, but closer this time. Isaac looked over at her, her hair having been pulled into a bun on the top of her head, and counted the wispy hairs that had fallen and were framing her face. Her hand thudded against his chest, and she whispered:
"Watch the movie!" Fallon smiled at him, before crawling on top of his lap. Her back was against the armrest, and her legs lazily laid across his thighs. When he squinted his eyes at her, she just smiled and waved in response. Every time Fallon knew there'd be blood, she'd crouch into Isaac's chest, pressing her cheek against him. She could feel the throb of his heartbeat quicken, and she thought it was because he was scared. Isaac was the only one that knew that his heart almost leapt out of his chest every time she got closer to him. Every time she'd flutter her eyelashes, or tap her thumb, or tilt her head back. Every time she'd push her hair behind her ear, or giggle, or so much as say his name, he couldn't help but feel as if that was the only thing that was real. Everything else was an illusion, but Fallon, Fallon was real. Her cheeks would flush, and her teeth would chatter, and her hair would get frizzy when it rained. Sometimes her sweater was so big that it would slip off of her shoulder, and sometimes her lips would tremble. But she was everything he could ever imagine.

That was it, though, that was the problem. He could imagine her, but he'd never kiss her or be able to say he loved her or meet her mom. The overwhelming fear of her never loving him crept over him and filled his brain with a thick cloud of smoke. Of course, he didn't know that she felt the exact same way about him.


"Where are we going?" After Isaac had left, another brunette boy had showed up at her doorstep, and dragged her into his Jeep along with Scott.

"We're going to school."

"Oh, sounds fun, such a great time! I always love it there they have the best food." Fallon rolled her eyes and leaned back in the passenger seat.

"Derek told us to come here. So Scott can remember whether or not he, you know, killed a man!"

"Whatever, whatever," She waved her hand around and held back a yawn. She was completely over all of this werewolf stuff. Scott wasn't even one of her good friends, but she had been dragged into it because Stiles is.

"You guys stay in here." Scott opened the car door, with Stiles in pursuit.

"Why does it feel like you're Batman and I'm Robin?" Stiles waved his hands frantically before running them through his hair.

"What?" Scott scrunched his face up, so Fallon pulled Stiles to the Jeep before another argument rose between the two of them.

"Neither one of you are Batman or Robin, okay?" Fallon whispered into Stiles ear in a soothing tone, the combination of her soft voice and warm breath calming him down.


"Hello?" Fallon spoke into her cell phone, a worried look on her face. He never called her, especially at 2 AM.

"Can you hear me? Hello?" She spoke again, urgency in her tone, she knew something bad was happening. The pit in her stomach seemed endless, and she could feel her heart start to fall down into it.

"Please… help me, Fallon, help me, he, he won't stop, I can't fix it, I can't do it," His voice was trembling and crackling, and she could almost hear the pain laced into his tone.

"Isaac? What's wrong?"


AN: I'M SORRY I TOOK SO LONG I LOVE YOU

Okay, so this chapter I wanted to focus a little bit more on Fallon's interaction with herself rather than with others. More about this will be coming soon!

Also stuff actually happened with Fallon/Isaac woah? Don't expect them to become "official" anytime soon though, that ain't how I work homie

I have no clue when the next chapter will be up. Tomorrow my brother is having a grad party, and Sunday is my dad's birthday, so I have no clue when I'll be able to sit down and write. Plus, I don't want to force myself to write too much because I know if I'm not really feeling it then it will be so bad, and I'll feel bad because it wasn't quality.

Yeah okay

Song at the beginning is There is a Light That Never Goes Out by The Smiths