Okay! I'm so so so sorry! I know I said I'd update and the night I said that I was totally going to do it! I had most of this chapter written anyway so I just had to add a little more in and I was going to post it the next day, but then my brother decided to throw my laptop on the ground and smash it because I asked him to stop punching me. That doesn't really matter. I'm just very sorry that it took so long to update and from now on I think I'm going to try and update every Sunday. Hopefully it'll work out well that way! Okay, I heart you all and read on!
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Previously

"Sorry to interrupt ma'am but do you by any chance have a paper clip so I could hold all of my papers together?" I ask and she nods sweetly handing me a paper clip. I do my best to smile at her but fail miserably and I walk away to my car. I throw the keys in the back so I don't start to drive and I make a clean cut, straight and perfect...not like me. I'm not perfect I'm far from it. I cut again and again and again and I don't know how many times I cut before I finally stopped to look down at my blood ridden wrist. Tears stream down my face as I slam the steering wheel in disappointment at myself making the car horn go off.

"I can't do anything right!" I scream at myself in the enclosed car and I throw my head onto the back of the seat. I throw a miniature temper tantrum and close my eyes. I look down at my left wrist which is still oozing blood and decide I actually need to do something about it. I go into the compartment on the passengers side to grab the bandages I keep in the first aid kit and notice I'm out. I grab my keys and put them in the ignition but then quickly remember I can't drive in this condition, it's just not happening. I can't bleed to death either...well I can, but I can't just leave Ally like that. I can't. I won't. What do I do...I can't go into the hospital...I mean I could I guess. But no I can't do that either, I don't want to be locked up in some looney bin, or a mental institution. I'll be locked away from my friends and family, that can't happen...I sigh and gather myself up and make my decision and as I put my foot down I know it's the wrong decision.

I made my decision and I put my foot down on the parking lot ground. I calmly walk into the hospital trying not to be noticed. My eyes are set on the front desk ahead and as I make my way there I trip over my own feet stumbling from a little dizziness, and now it's evident that I'll be spotted.
"Need another paper clip sir?" The nurse asks happily recognizing me from earlier when I asked for a paper clip...the thing that helped me. I shake my head slowly and hold my left arm up indicating the marks, tears are in my eyes ready to fall. Not because I'm in pain, but because I caved, someone knows besides Ally. Her eyes open a little but she immediately types things on the computer and dials a number on the phone and within a minute there's someone holding my other arm up and escorting me to a room. I can't believe I came to a freaking hospital. How dumb am I? NO ONE IS SUPPOSED TO KNOW THIS. It was either this or die, and I couldn't just do that to Ally...oh god Ally. I can't even begin to imagine what she'll think of me when she finds out about this. I check my surroundings and see the hospital room...I hate hospitals I don't know why, they're just full of disappointment. People dying who don't want to die, and people being saved who really want to go. They cleaned up my cuts and bandaged me but I couldn't get medication or anything because I wasn't brought in with an adult, not that I wanted medication. They asked me questions if I self harmed and I said no I was just helping my dad with moving some trees and got scrapped up, the believed it...but the nurse who gave me the paper clip and checked me in knew otherwise. Once I was bandaged the nursed told me she'd be making a call to my parents and I got the hell out of there and I went fast, I hopped in the car and drove home. I'll have to get Ally tomorrow, they're keeping her overnight for observation considering the blow to her head was pretty rough...her stupid brother, I hate him and I haven't even met him before.

I walk into the house ready for my parents to be sitting on the couch ready to yell at me and take me to a mental hopsital, but when I do walk in I see the same empty house I alwasy see. I see my plain white, bever used kitchen in front of me,my untouched living room with my couch that's only used for me to throw my backpack on, and to my left the staircase that leads to my room. AS I throw my backpack down into its usual place on the couch and run upstairs I can't help but think that they don't care, I don't want them to say anything, but I wished they cared somewhat. I accept defeat and collapse on my floor wishingfor nothing more than to release the pain by a few simple cuts, but I remember seeing Charolette's pained face when she saw my wrist the first time, and I remember the tears begging to fall from her eyes that were cause by me. I can't think like this now, i'ts not good for anyone..I try to count backwards from ten and close my eyes with every passing number. I find it amazing that every time my eyes shut I see another gorgeous movement from Ally. Ten - The back of her head looking up from her book. Nine - her hair following her as she turns around, it looking in slow motion. Eight - her eyes adjusting to me in front of her. Seven - a smile appearing on her face . Six - her eyebrows knit together confused that I haven't said a word. Five - a blush forming on her cheek because I just complimented her on how beautiful she looks. Four - her perfect lips mouthing out a silent 'thank you'. Three - her shutting her book and placing it on the table in front of her. Two - he pushing the chair back and standing up. One - her body pressed against mine as we hug. Zero - Her face smiling as she pulls away, only an inch from my face. I open my eyes and smile.

I make my way down to the first floor again just as the house phone rings, which aslso is never used, no one has the number which intrigues me to answer.

"Hello?" I say uneasily to the person on the other end.

"Hi Mr. Mike Moon?" The peppy sounding women says I cough a little in attempt to make my voice deeper.

"Yes, hello this is Mike,"

"Well Milke the CentraState Hospital of Miami wanted to inform you that your son Austin Moon checked in early today, we tried contactng you earlier but there was no answer,"

"Oh really? Why was he checked in? Another sports related injury I suppose?" I question trying to sound as oblivious as I possible could.

"Yes sir, we told you in our last voicemail too, your son came in with multiple cuts on his wrists, scaring, much older wounds...He said that he hurt it with you while moving trees, but the older wounds didn't make it very believable. We came to the idea that he might cut himself, and it has been going on for quite some time now. I think you and your family should take notice of him and maybe seek help, a therapist possibly? He isn't mentally stable."

"Oh wow, um thank you ma'am, my wife and I will get right on it. He did get cut up from the trees though, but just to be safe we'll bring him to a therapist or something. Thanks for your concern. Well we have to go speak with him now, thanks again! Bye!" I say hurriedly and hang up the phone thankful that my parents weren't home for once. Sure they didn't care, but that's not why they hadn't said anything. They hadn't said anything because they weren't home. The nurses words replay in my head 'Not mentally stable' 'therapist' 'other voicemail'. Crap, I had totally forgotten about the other voicemail, my parents have forwarded calling so they can easily hear the voicemail through there phones even though they're in Texas. I immediately delete the message and place the phone away. Noticing it is getting late and I won't be able to see Ally until tomorrow I crash on the couch, too lazy to walk back upstairs just to sleep.

The night consists of tossing and turning, waking up in a heated sweat every few hours or so, my mind just filling of nightmares of my life, and how it will come to an end. The way I'll die, the way people think of me, if Ally is alright...I really hope she is. She has to be though, because I can't be that punished in life. I can't have parents who don't care, clincal depression, and a worthless personality and on top of all that, I can't lose Ally. That's not how the world works, but it is. It is how the world works, it's just not how the world should work. I check the time, seven in the morning - go time. As I walk into the bathroom, tripping over my own feet might I add, I see myself..and I'm a hot mess. Dark circles under my eyes, bandages on my wrist, hair stuck to my face, basically I look like I just got beaten up, or I returned the dead. That'd be so cool if I was a vampire and I just came back to life, well technically I would'nt have died yet...and then I can jump around from tree to tree and fly and stop cars with my hands. Woahhh that'd be so awesome. I mentally slap myself in the face bringing me back to reality. After a really really quick shower that really just consisted of me standing in hot water for a minute I get out, run a towel through my hair, and throw on a baggy white shirt - that I would later regret wearing - and gray sweats. I pack an extra bag with the exact same outfit but they're my white sweats and baggy gray shirt. I haven't exactly done the laundry in a while...I don't even bother putting my bracelets on, but I do grab my dog tags and throw them in my pocket. After searching the house a good five minutes looking for my keys before remembering I left them in the ignition, I'm out of there and on my way to the hospital.

I show up and just nod at the front desk lady -whose name is Caroline by the way-, she looks just as tired as me, and probably over worked. She knows who I am now, but she does have a concerned look on those tired blue eyes when I walk in. I walk over to Ally's room. C214, because for some damned reason she has to be on the third floor, but that gives me more time to practice what I'll say. 'Hey Ally, I've missed you. I'm glad you're not dead,' sounds like it's a little too weird...maybe a simple 'Sup?' no, I can't do that...this girl is basically my best friend, but clearly much more than that. My words are caught in my mouth when I see Ally out of her hospital bed grabbing for the clothes she wore yesterday, the ones with blood on the back of her shoulder form where she "hit her head".

"Ally" I say, nearly breathless.

"Hi Austin," She replies just as silently, as she places the clothes on her bed. I walk over to her and wrap my arms around her waist and she does the same to my neck. I nuzzle my hair into her still fresh smelling hair, even though she hasn't showered in two days...it still smells fresh like an Ocean Mist. When we break away from the hug I grab the drawstring bag that was on my back and hand it to Ally.

"Here, I brought you some of my clothes, you can wear them until we get you some new ones. The pants are probably gonna be way too big, but well you know, there's a stringy thing on them,"

"A stringy thing? Really Austin?" She says jokingly, her eyes glowing. You can see the light just bouncing off of them. I smile in return as she looks down to take the bag. I just watch her face, as it goes from her natural smile, to a calm relaxed position, and then finally, the look that breaks my heart into a million pieces...that frown. "Austin?" She says pointing down at my clearly bandaged wrist. I look at her, both our smiles faded, and I shake my head, eyes watery and begging to fall from both our eyes, and I mouth a small 'no'. She nods in agreeance and brushes it off. "I'm going to go change real quick," She says, going back to her perky self, making me smile automatically. She walks out of the bathroom and I check her out - not pervetedly, just to see her in my clothes, and it's a sight I enjoy actually...she looks adorable.

"Uh Austin, did you do this on purpose," She points back and forth between the two of us. With my shirt and her pants matching and vice versa, and I just give her a chuckle, placing my hand on her shoulder and we turn away to walk out. Once all the stupid release forms are done, I offer to drive her home, but we decide against it...we weren't really in the mood for another concussion episode.

"Wanna go get something to eat?" I ask her. She looks at me, nods, and turns the volume on the radio up. We drive for the next ten minutes with the windows down, music loud, and not a care in the world. It was a nice ten minutes.

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I hope you liked it! I know it's not that amazing, it was really good before but after my brother broke my laptop I lost everything I had on it and now I have to use this dinosaur computer in my basement that uses dial up. It's quite pathetic. But that's how it is! I'm looking for 15 reviews please? Okay thank you I heart you all and I'll update Sunday! I won't be so slow this time! (Or maybe the Sunday after cause I kinda plan on being in New York this Sunday with R5, but WE'LL SEE!)