RSS Ch. 3: Degradation

Zhao Yun awakened quite pleasantly when dawn came, which surprised him once recollections of the previous night emerged hazy in his memory. He smacked his lips at the tangy dryness lingering on his tonge. He remembered overindulging, trying to wash out his raging thoughts with the relief of alcohol burning down his throat after Guan Yu left to turn in for the night. He couldn't remember anything after that, but he did recall the sensation of being carried. He couldn't explain it, but the feeling of strong arms wrapped around him made him feel safe, a comfortable and pleasant sensation of security that he hadn't felt in a long while.

When he opened his eyes, he was struck by the amber morning sun peering into his gaze. It only took a few glances of his surrounds to tell him that he definitely wasn't in his room.

His eyes came to the nightstand, where a strip of paper sat next to a bowl. He grabbed the strip and read the note written on it.

Try not to drink so much next time.

-Zhang Liao

The events of the night came up foggy, but there was one thing that shined through his darkened musings. The general standing before him as the moon cast a veil of frail light across his face, was all he could find himself focused on. His presence in his thoughts was so strong that even the blot of wine could not wash it away. He smiled, as if the man were standing before him now - it sparked his curiosity that he was kind enough to leave him this note.

He buried his face in his hands, groaning to himself, when the realization hit him that the general must have seen him passed out in the banquet hall. The thought was most embarassing; he must have looked like a bitter, drunken idiot with no manners for the formal occasion. That image was best left on Zhang Fei.

He drifted back to the recollection of himself being carried, when he realized something else. If Zhang Liao was the one who left him this note, then he must have been the one to carry him to this room. He had to wonder if he was lying in the axe general's room, and if so, where the general was now.

Zhao Yun's heart nearly burst out of his chest when he heard a loud bang coming from the doorway. He sat up to see two soldiers clad in black armor marching toward him. They must have been Lu Bu's men.

"Can I help..."

One of the soldiers reached forward and grabbed him harshly by the wrist, obviously not interested in listening to his words. Zhao Yun instictively tried to shake it away, but the soldier's grip was quite firm.

"Hey, what are you doing?" He raised his voice.

"You're coming with us."

"Why?"

"Lu Bu's orders. Get up!"

He debated if he should defy his captors. Two soldiers were trying to apprehend him, and he refused to go with them if he didn't at least know why.

"Unhand me!" He screamed. "I haven't done anything!"

The other soldier reached for his free hand and they both tried to drag him off the bed, but Zhao Yun shook them off and punched one of the soldiers. With his speed and quick wit, he tried to make an escape, but the other soldier grabbed his leg, and with a harsh thud, he found himself collapsed on the wooden floor. He kicked the soldier who tugged at his limb and tried to run again, only to collide with a third soldier who appeared in the doorway. The soldier pushed him back into the room, causing him to crash against the nightstand. When he tried to stand up again he felt one of the men pulling him back by both of his arms. While unable to move, the soldier that pushed him back walked up to him and landed a fist across his face. Zhao Yun grunted as he collapsed to the ground after the impact. He tried to resist when the first two soldiers restrained him on his knees by his arms. He ceased scrambling when the third soldier unsheated his sword and pointed it at his neck.

The room fell silent. He realized that he was unarmed and outnumbered in this situation. His skin crawled and shivered as the soldier held the cold, steel tip to his throat.

"You will obey us or else it will be your head," the soldier that pointed the sword at him theatened darkly, "Am I clear?"

Zhao Yun's face twisted in contempt at Lu Bu's underling, but he didn't dare move. He wouldn't risk throwing away his life at the tip of a sword. He needed to live to insure his lord's safety.

When the soldier was convinced that the warrior that kneeled before him was tamed, he sheathed his sword.

"Let's bring him in."


Zhang Liao returned to his quarters to check on Liu Bei's sleeping general, feeling nervous. For some reason, he was worried that Zhao Yun would be too hungover to remember their encounter the previous night. He couldn't explain why he felt anxious, whether it was because he was concerned for Zhao Yun's wellbeing or something else. There was no doubt that he had grown an attachment to the spear general after the previous night's events.

He opened the door to his chambers. The room was vacant and silent. Some of the furnature had been shaken up; the bowl of water that sat on his nightstand had fallen, dotting the floor with it's shattered remains.

This only intensified his worry but he stayed calm, not one to lose his cool often. He wondered where to go looking for Zhao Yun when a soldier appeared at his door.

"Master Zhang Liao."

"What is it?" He responded impatiently, not wanting to talk to anyone at the moment.

"I just thought you should know. A few guards came and dragged someone out of here. I didn't get a good look, but I think it was one of Liu Bei's men."

"They what? Where did they go?"

"I assume they took him to lord Lu Bu."

"Oh, no..." he whispered to himself with dread, "Okay, thank you, sir."

He mentally cursed himself as he quickly made his way to the throne room, where he assumed his lord would be residing, giving out orders. He realized just how stupid he was to bring Zhao Yun back to his quarters. Knowing Lu Bu, the flying general would assume the worst after discovering that an officer of the soon-to-be-enemy was invited to the quarters of his own subordinate. He knew his lord would not show any mercy when dealing judgement. Above all, Zhang Liao hated himself for placing the warrior in this predicament, and knew that he had to fix it.

He rounded the corner of the hall just in time to see three men, catching a glimpse of the spear warrior being dragged by two other soldiers.

"Hey! Hold up!" He called out to them when he could no longer see him. He picked up his pace as he continued in their direction, soon springing into a light jog as he followed them.

He stopped in his tracks when he came to the entrance to the throne room. The two guards harshly threw the general on the red carpet leading up to the throne where Lu Bu stood, crossing their swords at his neck. All the while, the flying general watched them as his face twisted in anger.

"What is this foolishness?" His voiced boom, echoing through the large, elegant chamber. "I asked you to bring me Zhang Liao. Does this look like him?"

"My lord," Gao Shun, one of the three soldiered that restrained Zhao Yun, spoke as he gave a bow. "We fetched Zhang Liao as you ordered, and we found this man in the general's chambers. Zhang Liao was not there."

Lu Bu quietly considered his words as he eyed the general being forced to kneel before him, walking up to him slowly. Zhang Liao, standing in the shadows, observed his lords movements. His expressions were unreadable, but his focus did not betray his interest in the situation. Zhang Liao waited to see how his lord would proceed.

The flying general stopped as his feet came into view of the kneeling general. He harshly took his chin in his hand, forcing him to look at him. "Why were you in Zhang Liao's chamber?" His voice was surprisingly calm.

The warrior remained silent, only eyeing the terrifying general with obvious contempt.

"Perhaps you did not understand me. What were you doing in Zhang Liao's room?" The general repeated, raising his voice ever so slightly. "Well?"

Still, no answer.

Say something, damn it! Zhang Liao silent cursed at the restrained warrior.

"I am told that one of Liu Bei's ilk was with Zhang Liao during the banquet last night. I'm assuming it was you?" He stated as more of an accusation than a question. Still, Zhao Yun said nothing. The flying general sighed, growing impatient with his captive. "Look, regardless of if you give me the benefit of an answer, whatever kind of affair you have going on with one of my own men, it ceases here. Now, you will answer me this time, vermin."

Finally, the warrior opened his mouth to speak. "It is outside of my honor to answer to anyone other than my lord Liu Bei."

"Even if it costs you your life?"

Zhao Yun hesitated ever so slightly before answering. "I know what you seek. I will not put my lord in danger by letting you use me."

Lu Bu's features twisted in anger for the slightest of moments at the defiant general, but he quickly regained his composure.

"If that's how you want it, I have no use for scum that would disobey my orders." He stood up and turned away from his prisoner. "Take him to the dungeon and let him rot there."

"Wait!"

Lu Bu's looked to the door as a desperate voice rang through the chamber. Zhang Liao appeared out of the shadows and into the throne room.

"You can't kill him!"

Lu Bu's gaze flared up with rage upon his emergence.

Loud thuds rang through the chamber like rapid thunder as he strode towards the axe general.

"You still think you can order me around! I thought I made myself clear last night that I, and only I, am in charge, not you.

"Lord Lu Bu, you need to think. If this man dies, it will be the end of our alliance with Liu Bei."

"Perhaps that would be for the best. There's only one reason why he was with you last night."

"He sparred with me last night, nothing more!" Zhang Liao raised his voice, not liking where this was going.

"Then what was he doing in your room? That's where these men found him." Lu Bu spat the last statement as if it disgusted him.

"He passed out after overindulging at the banquet last night. I brought him to my room to sleep in."

"And as for you?"

"I slept outside."

Lu Bu snickered darkly, and soon he erupted into a booming crackle that filled the room. "You must think I'm the dumbest man who ever lived. You really expect me to believe that? Why don't you stop trying to save face and just admit that this man exposed you for what you really are...a whore!"

Zhang Liao almost phased out from sheer astonishment. The intensity, the complete contempt that Lu Bu held in the word that he spat at him so mercilessly, pierced through his chisled skin. His shouts echoed in his ears, torturing him with the words that he wished he had not heard correctly.

"So..." his words came out strained, as if his throat was drench with the blood of shattered skin. "That's truely how you see it?"

Lu Bu stayed quiet, silently pitying the man that quivered before him, trying to hold himself together. "It matters not. Regardless of this man's motives, he trespassed on my troops quarters."

Zhang Liao finally snapped. "That does not give you the right to take his life!"

Almost immediately after his outburst, he felt a hand collide with his face. The force of it, coming from the flying general, was so strong it nearly knocked him off his feet. He stumbled, but quickly recovered, though his spirit didn't as much. The impact, both the force and implications if it, tore at his heart, but he took the brunt of it.

"You are in no position to claim what my rights are." Lu Bu growled. "You are under my command. You listen to me. When I say that I'm sending your little whore friend to die, you will abide by it. I'm through with this debate. Now leave!"

"No."

Lu Bu bared his teeth. "You still disobey me?" He hissed.

"I will not leave until you let this man go."

"And if I do not do as you say, then what?" He barked, challenging him.

"Then I will not hesitate to wield my blade against even my own lord."

"You wouldn't dare." His voice was so low, strained with anger and disbelief, the axe warrior could almost feel the rumble of his voice in his stomach.

"Try me."

Lu Bu stepped up to him, towering over him, nostrils flaring. Bursts of hot breaths splashed against his face, as his lord glared upon him with pure rage.

You're not going to intimidate me. Not this time.

Zhao Yun, still kneeling, saw all of this play out before him, bewildered. This officer, whom he had only met the previous night, defied even his own lord just to protect him. Why would he do that?

For all of the silence that passed as the flying general tried to reaffirm his superiority over his subordinate, Zhang Liao's face, marked red by his own hand, remained stern, determined to defy him. He showed no signs of fear or submission. Lu Bu never been challenged like this before.

The flying general relieved the tension in his eyes; he had to look away from his subordinate. He had brought this out of Zhang Liao, and to challenge him further would only tip the scale, if the officer's words were anything to go by. His rapid breathing slowed, until he let out a wary sigh. He fell quiet as he shifted from rage to contemplation. He closed his eyes in thought. Zhang Liao's anger receded as his lord's demeanor softened.

Seeing Zhang Liao's unfaltering defiance, he realized that he was losing this battle. That thought should have made him angrier, for the great Lu Bu never loses to anyone, but he realized he was bringing this loss upon himself. He knew the will of Zhang Liao. He was an honorable man that kept his word. If he killed this man, there was no question that he would lose Zhang Liao's loyalty. Despite his defiance, Zhang Liao was an officer that he valued very much.

"You two only sparred last night?" He asked.

"Yes. Diaochan summoned me afterwards."

"Then why were you late last night?" He questioned, but kept his voice low and empty of rage.

"I was wounded during our match." Zhang Liao responded holding out his arm wrapped in a bandage. Lu Bu nodded.

"This man slept alone in your room alone?"

"Yes. I slept in my tent."

He closed his eyes "Very well." Lu Bu concluded. He opened his eyes again and signaled to the guards. "Release him."

Zhao Yun was soon standing again, rubbing his neck after he was freed from the cold blades. He saw the general whom had just saved him sighing with relief.

"What is your name, son?" Lu Bu asked.

Zhao Yun had to restrain himself from rolling his eyes at Lu Bu's sudden attempt at diplomacy. But at the risk of being arrested again, he answered."

"Zhao Yun."

"Well, Zhao Yun, you live to fight another day. You should be grateful that you know how to pick your friends. If Zhang Liao here was a coward, you'd certainly be a gone man." He cocked his head smugly before continuing. "However, you still trespassed on my troops quarters and for that there will be a consequence," His attention shifted to the officer that still stood behind him, "Gao Shun!"

"My lord?"

"Go and tell Liu Bei that Zhao Yun, will no longer be serving him. He is a part of my army now."

Both of the generals were taken aback. Zhao Yun was instantly swept with confusion.

Did he just...claim me?

Zhang Liao on the other hand was immediately ready to reject his lord's words, but before he could say anything, Lu Bu shifted his attention to him, "You are to keep Zhao Yun in check from now on. He's you're responsibility."

Zhang Liao didn't ponder before choosing to protest again, but Zhao Yun stepped before him and grabbed his shoulder. "No Master Zhang Liao. It's okay, really."

"Zhao Yun. You can't be willing to accept this. You've done nothing wrong "

"I'm not, but you've done enough for me already. I can take care of this."

He'd said it with the slightest of smiles, but he noticed the sadness that seemed to engulf the axe general as he held his gaze.

Zhang Liao looked upon the spear general's bruised face as he succumbed to guilt. This man had been assaulted, almost put to death, and now was being forced into servitude for actions that were not his own. He never could have thought just a simple act of kindness could bring a man such shame, but he cursed himself despite his lack of foresight.

Lu Bu meant to return to the throne when he froze. "Oh, and one more thing. This goes to both of you," he said through a smirk. "It would be in your best interest to keep each other in check, because if either one of you ever steps out line from this point on, then it will be both of you who will suffer for it."

Zhao Yun held his eyes open in shock. He gave Zhang Liao a sideways glance; the axe general no longer showed signs of anger, only downcast.

"As you wish, my lord." He conceded as he bowed his head. He never made eye contact with the flying general, but Zhao Yun could pick up on the bitterness and almost defeated tone in his voice.

"That'll be all. Now both of you get out of my sight."

So this is the way Lu Bu confronts his own officers? Zhao Yun thought. It was obvious now that he could never truely serve one such as Lu Bu. What with such cruelty that he displayed to both his enemies and allies, he had no honor or respect for the values of others. Cruel, arrogant, and selfish, he was a far cry from the mercy, virtue, and bravery that his lord Liu Bei displayed. He wasn't even worth the dirt that he walked on.

Zhao Yun was almost ready to join Zhang Liao's protesting from earlier, but the axe general turned and walked away before he could say anything. The way he trot so slowly, his head still held up in the most stiff and begrudged manner, he knew the emotions that went through him despite his subtle gestures. Shame. It must have been too familiar of a feeling for someone serving Lu Bu.

He hated seeing him like this, considering that he had done nothing wrong. Was it Zhang Liao's fault that he decided to drink himself to sleep last night? This was his own doing by his own foolish misconduct, but to see someone else suffer for it was unbearable. There was nothing more shameful to a warrior than another having to take their own fall. That was the mark of a coward; an insult.

His attention came back to Zhang Liao when he stopped before reaching the door. "Let's go Zhao Yun."

He hesitated. He wanted to stand and fight for the axe general as he did for him, but he remembered Lu Bu's words. If he were to defy him, then Zhang Liao would be the one to take the fall, as his punishment.

Regretably, Zhao Yun gave in and followed him out of throne room.


All he could feel now was anger.

He wasn't angry because he was being forced into servitude for someone else. He knew that he was strong enough to face the danger that would arise if he continued to serve Liu Bei despite orders not to. He wasn't angry because Zhang Liao had brought him to his own room and now he was being being punished for trespassing. It was his own fault that he had overindulged and passed out like a drunken bastard.

He was angry because he was being used, he realized. He could tell from their heated conversation earlier, that there was some bad blood between Lu Bu and his subordinate general. When Zhao Yun was thrusted into the picture, Lu Bu saw an opportunity to punish Zhang Liao for speaking out against him.

He sat on the bedside in Zhang Liao's room, alone, irritable, and feeling utterly worthless. There was nothing that he could do. What infuriated him most was that Lu Bu's scheme was working. Neither of them could stand against him, concious of the fact that the other would face retribution for their actions. They could never let another warrior take their own fall, it was simply beneath their honor. Lu Bu knew this, and he was using his own officer's value to subjugate him.

"How...how could someone be so cruel." He whispered as he clentched his fist.

So now he had to sit here and decide which path he should take. Should he continue to serve Liu Bei, knowing that Zhang Liao could be punished, possibly killed, for his actions, or should he serve Lu Bu to salvage what was left of his own honor?

No matter how much he told himself that Liu Bei needed him, he couldn't allow himself to bring harm to Zhang Liao. That man stood up to his own lord for him. If he allowed him to die, he would have done so for a man of no honor. His name would forever be disgraced.

He tried to think of a third option. He could attempt to assassinate Lu Bu, but not only would that put Zhang Liao at risk, such an attempt would spark suspicions of an uprising in Liu Bei's ranks. Liu Bei would surely be put to death.

So that's it. His quest to serve Liu Bei had been brought to an end, he was being forced into the army of Lu Bu, a man disloyal to the Han. He was bound to this warrior, Zhang Liao. In one morning his entire life had changed, his future uncertain. When the power of the imperial army finally came down upon Lu Bu, as it did Dong Zhuo, what was to become of him?

He heard the door opening, bringing him out of his trance. He glanced up to see Zhang Liao approaching him, a steaming medicine cup in one hand.

"I made some tea out of Dang Quai herbs. It should relieve some of the pain and bring down the swelling..."

Zhao Yun gently took the cup from him and lightly held it to his face, letting the steam wisp over his notriles. He sipped the medicide after deciding that it wasn't too hot.

"My thanks."

Zhang Liao sat on the bedside next to him. Zhao Yun watched as his steely eyes frantically roamed around the room, his gaze never once falling on him. He hadn't made eye contact with Zhao Yun since they left the throne room. He thought to ask why he suddenly felt uncomfortable around him, but a part of him knew why. He really thought that all of this was his own doing. His gaze roamed back to the brown liquid swirling in his cup. The bitterness of guilt flowed forth from his gut.

Though his thoughts raged on, his body felt as if washed up within a storm surge. Coming so close to the jaws of death was always quiet an emotional strain. His glare turned to the other general again. He'd be as good as dead if it wasn't for his intervention, he realized.

"Why did you stand up for me?"

The spear general's curiosity gained on the other man. His expression conformed quickly to his usual rock hard demeanor.

"I refused to let another man die because of my mistake. I wasn't ready to live with that guilt. Not again."

"Why should you feel guilty? I was the one who..."

"Don't! Please!" Zhang Liao shot back. "Remorse is exactly what Lu Bu wants you to feel."

That bit of information piqued some interest. He was confident now of Lu Bu's cruelty, but he had to know the extent of it, and how it affected Zhang Liao. He thought back to when he witnessed Lu Bu striking him across the face.

"Why are things like this between you two?"

Zhang Liao turned to meet his gaze, staring at him with incredulity.

"You said that you were Lu Bu's bodyguard. Why does he treat you that way."

He saw the axe general's expression twist in anger ever so slightly. Frustration is what he guessed it stemmed from.

"Lu Bu trusted me to keep him safe. Whenever he came across an adversary that he couldn't handle, he knew that I would always be there to protect him. I attempted to use my position as his right hand man to be his voice of reason."

Zhao Yun remembered their conversation before they sparred the previous night. Lu Bu on his own could not be trusted. He knew why Zhang Liao had to keep his sights on the flying general, but...

"Was it worth it?"

For the second time that day, a wave of solemness washed over his expression.

"No matter how hard you try, somethings just cannot be changed."

The general began to take his leave again. At the door, he stopped and turned back to Zhao Yun only halfway. Even from that angle, he could see his expression plastered with defeat.

"Don't blame yourself," Zhao Yun said. The general turned the rest of the way towards him. An encouraged expression came upon him. There it was again, that smile.

Zhao Yun could only observe the solemner general before he exited the door, leaving him with his heavy thoughts. He buried his face in his hands in a fit of self loathing. He let Lu Bu take advantage of him. He allowed himself to be taken from his lord Liu Bei, and he let Zhang Liao be tortured by his own master. Zhao Yun feared that he wouldn't have the strength face Lu Bu, but he had been defeated before he even set foot on the battlefield against him.

Zhang Liao closed the door behind him as he left, but he found himself without the strength to continue walking any further. He leaned back against the door, sighing in bitter defeat.

He had never felt so worthless before. Not only had he tried hopelessly to steer Lu Bu away from his self-destructive ways, but because of his failure, he allowed someone else to take the fall with him, someone who by no means deserved this cruelty. Now it seemed he would be bound to Zhao Yun, and should the young warrior ever displease Lu Bu, he would have to face his lord's retribution as a cruel reminder to Zhang Liao that he had failed to change his lord's heart. What's worse, should he himself ever stand against Lu Bu, he could have the blood of an innocent man on his hands.

On this day, Zhang Liao no longer felt like an officer, but a prisoner, of Lu Bu. Regardless of the path that his master takes, no matter how vile, shortsighted or destructive, he had no choice but to stay by his side for Zhao Yun's sake.

Zhang Liao's heart skipped a beat when he realized what Zhao Yun's fate would be. Whatever gruesome fate was to befall Lu Bu and his army, Zhao Yun had no choice but to be a part of it.

The imperial army was coming, he could feel it. Whether Lu Bu believed it or not, he would have to face them. His denial only assured Zhang Liao that he would not survive the imminent storm. In one fell swoop he had doomed not only himself, but his entire army as well. That included Zhao Yun.

Zhao Yun would not escape. He knew that a warrior of honor like him would not risk bringing harm to another for his own benefit. Yet he would not fight Liu Bei. He would be killed by the imperial army along with the rest of them. Out of all of them, he would suffer most for being the only person to hold fast to his honor, and the only person to do what's right.

"And it's all because of me. I made a promise to Master Lu Bu...and to Zhao Yun...and I failed them both."

Distraught with guilt and hopelessness greater than the pain of any wound he had suffered on the battlefield, the axe general slid against the door and sat before it. He wished he could say he was stronger than this, but what good was strength now. There was nothing he could do to fix anything.

"Damn it."