Amanda followed Olivia to the back of the squad room, Olivia grabbed a paper towel and folded it up, and wiped away some of the tears from Amanda's now pale cheeks. Amanda just let the tears continue to come out, and braced herself for what she knew Olivia was about to ask. "We're gonna have to talk about it...you know I'm gonna need to ask you some Questions." Olivia said her lip quivering a little bit, as she bit her tongue, not wanting to cry in front of Amanda but feeling even worse for not realizing it was Amand who had been attacked, and then was rude with her afterwards.
"I know..I know you do.." Amanda said wiping her nose, as she hung down her head in shame. Olivia knew Amanda was blaming herself so she spoke up. "Amanda..this wasn't your fault..you did what you had to..you survived..your a survivor..Ok?" Liv asked placing both hands on Amanda's shoulders and pulling her into her. "Do you want to go ahead and get this over with..?" Olivia whispered as she held onto Amanda who was like her little sister.
"I guess..let's go ahead." Amanda said lifting her head from Liv's now soaked shoulder.
"Okay sweetheart..let's go back here." Olivia said as she pointed to the questioning room. Amanda followed her, passing Munch and Cragen as they stared at her walking down the hall.
"Let's start with what happened once you left the precinct." Liv said letting out a large gasp of air, as she turned the recorder on.
"I-I wanted to clear my head, the uhh, case that we were working on that night..it had gotten to me..it had gotten in my head." Amanda said as she rubbed her forehead, not wanting to remember.
"And then what happened?" Liv continued to ask.
"I walked to the parking garage..I got this.." Amanda sighed, and felt as if she would throw up. "I got this bad gut feeling..I just knew something was off..I had my hand on my gun..and I walked up the stairs to get to the uhh..the uhm 3rd level of the garage, and that's when he.." Amanda stopped right there and put her face in her hands.
Olivia grabbed her arm in a comforting manner. "We can stop for a few minutes..do you want something to drink?" Olivia asked feeling sorry for her Friend and Coworker.
"No..I wanna keep going.." Amanda said as she grabbed neck and began to rub it, it was still covered by the turtle neck she had on.
"Okay..well just take your time sweetie." Olivia said rubbing her shoulder, trying to comfort her.
"I felt a uhm..a sharp cold blade, it was against my neck, I grabbed for my gun and I was.." Amanda just starred off into space as she tried to get the words out of her mouth, she still had her hand on her neck rubbing it lightly.
Olivia saw Amanda staring and deep into her thought. She too stared off, and thought back to the time in Salview with Lowell Harris. "No.." Olivia remembered herself crying as he unzipped his pants and put his member closer, and closer to her face, and about to make her take him in her mouth. Olivia snapped back to reality with tears in her eyes.
"Amanda..Amanda." Olivia called out, trying to get her attention. Finally Liv knocked on the table and said her name once more and this snapped Amanda out of her trance, she too had tears in her eyes.
"Oh..sorry." Amanda said looking at Liv.
"It's okay, what happened next?" Olivia asked not really wanting to hear, but knew she had to.
"I..I was trying to turn off the safety on my, uhm my gun.." Amanda said eyes wandering around the room not wanting to look at anyone or see anyone looking at her. "I couldn't get it off in time, and he knocked it out of my hands." Amanda spoke quietly looking down at her shaking hands.
"I tried to fight back.." Amanda said wanting Liv to know she didn't just give up.
"I know you did sweetie..." Olivia said giving her a reassuring facial expression.
"He wrestled me down to the ground and got on..he.." Amanda stopped for a second and pulled down her turtle neck exposing the cut along her throat that had tiny stitches going through it.
"Oh..my-" Olivia got up and walked to the other side of the table and kneeled down in front of Amanda "He did that to you?" Olivia asked waving her hand around her neck on the verge of crying.
"Yes..he did that right before he got me on the ground." Amanda replied. Olivia put her hand over her mouth and shook her head as she walked back over to her seat. "Okay, what happened once you where on the ground?" Liv asked.
"He took my cuffs..and he..he cuffed my hands above my head and onto a hand rail..." Amanda whispered to Liv as she looked at her bruised wrists as she pulled up her sleeves. "The next thing I know he had his..he..he had his fingers inside me..I tried to draw back..but he just kept..pushing deeper..it hurt so bad.." Amanda was crying again and at this point had also began shaking all over. Olivia didn't want to ask her to go on, but she knew she had to.
"What happened next Amanda?" Liv asked.
"i was crying and begging him to get off of me, but he didn't..he finally entered me, and after what seemed like ages he was off of me, he uncuffed me..he didn't threaten me..or tell me not to call..well call you." She said crying as she looked up at Liv. "He took my underwear with him, that's what Warner is probably processing right now.." She added.
"What did you do afterwards?" Liv asked.
"I went to our local hospital first, that's when I first called you, But I got scared and left..I knew the nurses there and didn't want special treatment..or anything like that." Amanda stated drying her tears from her face.
"I went home, I took off my clothes..it hurt so bad." Amanda said as she waved her hand around her privates. "I was going to take a shower and forget it had happened but I decided to be brave..to be fearless..like you." Amanda stated. Olivia couldn't hold back her tears anymore she just set there and let the warm tears fall down her cheeks as she listened to Amanda.
"So I changed clothes and went to a local hospital about 50 miles away from here. I got this stitched, and I did the rape kit..in hopes I would be even braver and come forward like I'm doing now.." She gave a half-smile through her tears.
"Wow, you know Amanda..I was in a position kinda like yours..I never told anyone..just Warner..I kept it bottled up, You are Fearless..and you're so brave." Liv said shaking her head up and down to reassure Amanda as she turned the recorder off. Amanda gave Liv another half-smile and the she lipped to her "Thank you.." as she squeezed her hand from across the table.
Olivia and Amanda walked out of the Interview room to Captain and Munch.
"We need a Rape Kit from General Hospital sent down to us." Liv stated with proud-ness for Amanda.
"I'm on it." Cragen said still really not sure what to say or how to react to what had just unfolded in his squad room.
Fin and Amaro walked in at perfect timing. "We got any leads?" Fin said pissy that he hadn't already caught the sick bastard.
"No nothing right this Sec." Munch answered folding his arms.
"I can't believe this." Fin said looking at there white board full of suspects, crime scene photos, and victims photo's.
Amanda walked back into the Squad room from the bathroom. "Well.." she said.
"I'm sorry Manda..I didn't find the sick bastard yet." Fin said angry at himself.
"Hey guys.,it's been a long day..I think we should all go ahead and head home." Cragen said as he walked out of his office with his coat and hat on.
"Okay, No complaints here." Amaro said slapping his hands down on his knees.
"Me either." Olivia snapped back and let out a sigh.
"Hey do you want to stay with me tonight?" Olivia asked Amanda. Amanda looked over at Fin hoping he would offer her the same thing, but he was too busy being mad at himself to ask her.
"That would be so nice of you.." Amanda said shaking her head yes to Liv's Question.
"Okay let me just grab our coats." Liv said. Amanda just stared at Fin still hoping he'd ask before she left with Liv.
"Ready?" Liv said seeing Amanda starring at Fin.
"Yea.." she quickly snapped putting her coat on.
