Hello, my fellow readers. Thank you so much for reviewing. I finally decided to post a chapter because I haven't gotten to this and God knows how long. I haven't touched this since the 28th of last month. That's pitiful, but this is more of a filler chapter so I can probably try to get the second chapter of Poisoned Heart. It's been dormant for some time so I got to get to that. Not to Mention, I have to post that chapter for A Blood-Stained Romance so you can see my dilemma of why I really haven't had the time to post. I basically have to much on my plate at one time, so sorry for the wait. Anyway thank you for all the ones who stuck with me and I hope you enjoy this chapter. I won't post more for a while, but mostly because I'm trying to work on Poisoned Heart and For The Love Of My Pain more. The ones y'all so greatly desire, so yeah. Anyway, Favorite, Follow, and Review. Thank you all so much. Enjoy!?


Chapter 8 – Conflicted

(Kendall's P. O. V)

It's been over a month since I slept with Beau. I couldn't get the haunting images out of my mind, burned and encased in my sub-conscious, slowly torturing my psyche deep within. It hurt me so much that I didn't tell him. I mean I couldn't. I didn't know if it was because of my shame, or the horrifying reality that I kinda like it. It was so fucking wrong in every way in pure existence, but I couldn't help but think about it or deny the deep desire I felt that night. I also couldn't fight the impulsing guilt that seemed to get worse and more worse every day.

I loved my Logie to death. But for once in my life, I was confused about my own choices. I've always been so sure about what I wanted, but now I didn't have a clue. Logan was slowly trying to make it up to me and it was getting harder to deny the guilt that now plagued my heart, eating away and destroying me, slowly consuming me in my own deep depths of treacherous lies. It hurt so bad, as it began to scorch my inner being, painfully engraving it in my bleeding soul each passing day. Logan took a week off to spend time with me, just being sweet in general, but the more he did, the more worse I felt.

Every chance I got, I became detached, constantly getting caught in my own thoughts. No matter how much I thought things over, nothing made sense. It's like the universe picked this one week to mess with my head. I mean, I'm trying to enjoy the attention from my husband that I craved, but I couldn't. At this point, I didn't know what to do. I was caught in a web of my lies, and I couldn't get out. I'm like a spider who got caught in its own web, I was doomed from the beginning. I sat comfortably in my seat, deep in my thoughts as I tried to make my universe come into focus. I hears a knock on the door. I gently got out of my desk and opened the large door where our mail room boy, Jeremy was. The brunette held a batch of pure white roses.

"Someone dropped these off for you, Mr. Knight" as he placed them in my arms.

"Thank you, Jeremy." He smiled, nodding, as he walked off to deliver the brown like package in his hands. I closed the big door and searched the flowers for a note. I found the em-embroidered card and read.

"My dear Kendall. When I saw these, I thought of you. My rose, Beau."

I rolled my eyes as I tossed them in the waste basket, sitting in my chair, as I put my head in my hands. Beau. I've been trying to avoid him ever since that happened and the more I do, the more he sends me gifts and flowers, basically thinking of every possible way to get close to me. In truth, it agitated me to no end. Even though I made a mistake by sleeping with him, doesn't mean I would leave Logan for him. I didn't love him. I mean, I was already confused. He was not helping my case even in the slightest way. Right now, I couldn't stand to look at him. Every time I did it reminded me of the horrible mistake I made that night. I know it wasn't his fault. This problem was a product of my own actions and I have to face the consequences, but still working with the guy I slept with was not helping my emotions right now.

Deep down in my heart I loved Logan and I always will. Nothing no one could ever tell me would make it untrue. I didn't have a heart without him, but I just hated the small desire of something more deep in the back of my mind, but was I willing to risk everything for it? A few tears ran down my face, as my heart darkened as the many thoughts of Logan filled my mind, and clouding my soul.


(Logan's P. O. V)

I carefully tried to stop the bleeding of the patient beneath me. Their monitor beeping beside me, making my heart pound deep in my chest knowing this was always was the worst part of being a doctor. The constant feeling of the patient's lives' in your hands. The looked at the gushing blood, making my head feel woozy and making my heart stop in slight fright at the red substance. I took a breath as I glanced at the doctor on the other side of the table in blue scrubs began to stable him, closing and stitching the bloody gunshot wound.

I immediately stepped out to breathe after I made sure all his vitals were fine. I pulled down my blue mask as the blood on my gloves stained the thin fabric. I made my way to the doctors' station, letting out a deep sigh. I removed the blood-stained gloves, throwing the in the trashcan. I washed my hands, washing the bloody residue of the surgery ran down the drain. I felt something fall out of my coat-pocket as I watched as a picture of my Kendall fell into the sink. I quickly turned the water off as I picked it up, and wiped the bloody-water residue off of the surface. I closed to door to the doctors' station as I sat, frowning. I looked at the photo and my heart filled with sorrow. My face in a frown as I held it close.

Kendall. The object of my heart's desire and affections, the one I couldn't stop thinking about. I've been slowly trying to make it up to him, but I knew deep down it wouldn't be enough to fix the issues in their marriage, let alone repair the hole in my lover's heart. Oh Kenny, what am I gonna do? I found myself rubbing the photo of a smiling Kendall. I thought swiftly of the memories of the beginning of our once beautiful marriage. When things were easy. Before I got my job, and began to use it to neglect the one I love. A time when we didn't fight. A time when we were both happy, and not on the brink of divorce due to my own actions.

In the deep part of my soul, if we continued on like this, only a dreadful ending will remain. Shambles of a once beautiful marriage would soon be destroyed and it would be all his fault, for not being the best husband he could be. I didn't want that and I swear I will fix this. I promise, as my heart began to ache and withered at the poisonous thought.


Well, that was all. I hope you like it enough to think it was good enough. I might do a surprising twist to this affair. You never know. Anyway, thank you for reading. Follow, Favorite, and Review. Thank you so much for reading. Goodnight.