"Where is she?" Lexa demanded when she had reached camp Jaha after realising that Clarke had succeeded and brought the Mountain Down

"She doesn't want to see you" Bellamy replied

"Where is she?" Lexa repeated, putting her hand on her sword

"Kill me if you want, commander, but she still won't want to see you." Bellamy said and stalked inside of the Arc

"Go back to camp, Indra. Make sure the injured are seen to and everyone is fed" While the army was running through the forest they came up against sixty Mountain Men who had already been cured. The Mountain men had guns and explosives, injuring twenty of her people before they had realised what was going. Some had been severely injured with limbs being blown off by the explosives while others had minor injury's such as a bullet to the leg.

"Heda?" Indra asked

"I'm staying here. I will wait until Clarke wishes to see me before I return" Lexa said, "Go"

"Octavia, stay with the Commander at all times unless she orders you to leave." Indra told he second who nodded and went to stand beside Lexa

"That isn't necessary" Lexa commented but made no real objections towards it


It took two days for Lexa to memorise the guard schedule and a third to figure out the floor plan of the Arc and almost a week to discreetly gather enough information to know that Clarke was residing in the healing ward. The moment she knew Clarke was in the healing ward, her heart and mind stopped for what felt like an age before both started again at triple the speed that they were before, her heart was beating so hard and fast she was sure it would burst straight out of her chest while her mind played endless scenario's about what could have happened to Clarke. That was what put Lexa in the current situation she was in, hiding underneath a bed because she rushed ahead and didn't think about any remaining factors when sneaking into the healing ward, like Clarke's friends visiting her. An hour passed and she was still hiding underneath the bed and her body was starting to cramp from staying in the same position for so long when it was used to nearly constant movement

"I'm getting tired, guys" Clarke's voice sounded rough but it made Lexa's heart swell with joy at hearing it again

"Okay, we'll leave you. Sweet dreams" Her friends murmured and one by one until the room was completely empty again and Lexa slowly got out from underneath the bed to see Clarke already asleep. Lexa took this time to gaze at the women she thought dead and try to access the extent of her injury's before sitting on the edge of Clarke's bed and letting herself feel all of the emotions she had pent up. Her head was bent over into her hands and her body shaking from the silent sobs and her mouth whispered "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry" over and over again to the sleeping girl. Lexa didn't notice Clarke's eyes opening or her body sitting up until she felt a hand touch hers

"I'm so sorry, Clarke" Lexa whispered with tears on her cheek and her hand tightly gripping Clarke's

"I didn't understand why you left. I didn't and I was so angry at you. But then I had to make a choice, kill everyone in the Mountain and save my people or have them kill my people and I understood. I can't blame you for leaving when I know I would have done the same" Clarke whispered, trying to shift closer to Lexa and grimaced in pain before Lexa gently pushed her back down

"You're hurt. What happened?" Lexa asked

"It's nothing" Clarke replied

"What happened, Clarke?"

"It was only Octavia, Monty and Jasper. They figured out we were there and sent cured people to find us. I didn't have a gun so I tried to get close enough where their guns would be too difficult to use but he shot be in the stomach and leg before I could get closer. I would be dead if it wasn't for Octavia, she saved my life." Clarke relayed the story, "Then we made our way to the control room with the leaders father. I shot him because the leader wouldn't give me my people. They started removing marrow faster so I had Monty hack into the system. I radiated the entire floor, killing everyone who hadn't received treatment yet. I killed them without a single thought to who I was killing" Clarke's voice broke, "I tried to be the good guy but I killed innocent children and people who helped us."

"There are no good guys in war" Lexa whispered, "Only those who survive and those who lose"

"Why are you here, Lexa?" Clarke asked, tightening her grip on Lexa's hand

"Ai sonraun laik yu sonraun. Why didn't you want to see me?"

"I was scared. I feel so weak right now and I was scared of you seeing me weak." Clarke answered, knowing that Lexa wouldn't translate trigedasleng

"You're the strongest person I've ever met" Lexa agreed, looking into Clarke's eyes and seeing how tired she was, "Rest. I'll be back later"

"Don't leave me" Clarke whispered to Lexa's retreating form and watched as the commander tensed before turning back around

"Never again" Lexa said, taking a seat in the chair nearest to Clarke's bed


Lexa was jolted awake by the sound of Clarke screaming out, Lexa automatically went for her sword when she realised that Clarke was still asleep and thrashing around in the cot.

"Clarke" Lexa whispered, gently shaking her shoulder to try wake the girl up, "Clarke" Lexa tried shoving a little harder and when that didn't work, she climbed into Clarke's bed beside her and pulled the girl so she was half on the lap and whispered sweet nothings in between gently kissing Clarke's face. Lexa could vividly her mother doing this for her after her first kill or be killed situation. Slowly, Clarke's screams turned to whimpers which soon turned into the sound of the blondes even breathing. Lexa tried to move from the bed but felt Clarke's arms tighten around her and looked to see blue eyes staring up at her

"Hei" Lexa murmured

"Hello" Clarke replied

"Are you okay?"

"You left and didn't come back"

"I am right here, Clarke" Lexa replied, confused

"In my dream" Clarke clarified, "You left and you didn't come back. You didn't care."

"I would never leave you for long. Osir keryon ste teina. Sleep now Clarke, you must rest" Lexa said, trying to get up only to be anchored down again

"I... Can you stay here, please? Just tonight" Clarke asked in a quiet voice

"Okay" Lexa replied simply

"You know Octavia can translate everything you wont say in my language, don't you?" Clarke asked after a long silence

"Yes. I also know that you want to hear it from my mouth so you wont ask. Go to sleep." Lexa replied, gently kissing Clarke's forehead and tightened her arms around the girl