Warning: This piece is NOT for kids. In fact I had to change the rating of the whole collection into a "T" just to accommodate this one. I'm sorry but this author has a dirty, dirty mind. So be prepared, if you are still going to read it.

BTW,R&R is virtue.:)


Girls' Talk

It was one of these rare days that the Mugiwara Pirates could spend their time in peace. No marine attacks, no rival pirate ships looking for trouble, no signs of suspicious tides or thunderstorms…for once Nami was very grateful.

She lied on her tummy on a lawn chair with an A4 size magazine placed in front of her, basked in the warm soothing afternoon sun and flipped the pages half-heartedly. Next to her, the other female member of the crew sat with a hard-covered open book on her knees. She too seemed to be enjoying the moment of quiet reading.

"Bullshit…" Suddenly Nami murmured under her breath.

Robin raised her eyes to see a slightly blushing Nami staring blankly at certain content in the magazine. The older woman smiled a knowing smile. "Interesting piece of article there, Navigator san?"

Nami stirred from her lying position and quickly closed the magazine in front of her. But she knew this was in vain: with Robin's ability to open up a peephole on basically anything, there really was no point hiding what she was reading.

Reopening the magazine, she complained jokingly to Robin: "It's just this stupid article about…well, men's sexuality. I can't believe we are in New World now and they still publish crap like 'the length of a man's… manhood is proportional to his nose'…I mean if that's the case then Ussop must be really great in bed—EWWWW!" Nami shuddered at the very disturbing mental image and shook her head violently to try to erase it

Robin chuckled behind her book. "You can always have a try—if you are that curious."

"Robin!" Nami screamed blushing some more. However, after her blush faded, the young girl couldn't help drawing her eyes back to her conversation partner. "Ano, Robin? Have you ever wondered which one of the boys is best at…the stuff?"

"The stuff, huh?" there was an amused twinkle in the archaeologist's blue eyes. "Well, honestly, I have."

"So which one—I mean in your opinion?" Nami sat up a little and leant closer to the older woman, eager to hear the answer. Her cheeks were still pinker than usual, and it seemed obvious to Robin that the young girl could hardly contain her curiosity.

"Why don't you start sharing, Navigator san? I'm sure you already have a name in mind." The older woman encouraged with a small smile on her lips.

Nami bit her lips and looked around to see if anyone had entered the hearing range of their conversation. When she was 100% certain that the deck was clear, she began in a hushed tone: "It has to be Zoro, don't you think so? Just look at that body of his! Those biceps, those ribs…and the way he handles his three swords…not to mention the fact that he can keep lifting 10 ton barbell for hours! I mean, that physique plus incredible stamina plus a pair of skillful hands—you do the math Robin."

"I see somebody has a little crush on somebody~~" The older woman teased causing Nami to jump up to protest. "No~! I was just being objective!" the pretty pink hue reappeared on her cheeks in almost no time.

"Speaking of being objective, I think you weren't quite there because you forgot to take our dear Captain into consideration."

"Eh? Luffy? " Nami was genuinely surprised at Robin's comment. She'd never associated Luffy with anything even the slightest sexual. The boy just looked so innocent. "Why?" she asked the older woman, puzzled.

"He's rubber, and he can stretch—if you know what I mean." Robin smiled slyly while giving Nami a wink, which caused the younger girl to immediately burst into a fit of hysterical giggles.

"Oh Robin, you are so evil~~"

0~0~0~0~0

Meanwhile in the galley—

"How many times do I have to say to your faces, shitty bastards? No meat for you until the next meal! And no sake for you because I think you are annoying!" The blond cook berated, standing guard in front of his locked freezer. Opposite to him stood a very disappointed Luffy and a clearly irritated Zoro.

The two boys suddenly sneezed loudly in chorus; their spits spraying over Sanji's face.

"Ewww! Disgusting! Don't you have any manners?" the cook leapt back and wipe his face with his sleeve, "Get out of my kitchen!"

"Ne,Zoro. Do you think we've caught a cold?" Luffy asked the swordsman on their way out, blinking mechanically.

"No." Zoro assured his captain in a quite confident tone. "Only fools catch cold in the summer." He continued to mumble mostly to himself. "Why do I get the feeling that somebody has been saying stuff behind my back?..."

-The End-