Into the light and back part 8

Annie had spent the evening with Auggie and she had had a hard time to hide, how disappointed she really was, that Auggie had lost his sight again. She had cried a bit in his presence, but she did not want him to know, how deep this sadness was. He had been through enough and he did not need to worry about her again. At least that is what she thought.

It wasn´t that his visual disability mattered to her. She had met him, when he had already been blind for some time. His blindness was never an issue between them and she loved and appreciated Auggie the way he was.

But on the other hand, she had wished so much, that he might keep his regained vision forever. Auggie was a great person, and a very capable one in many fields but she had had so much fun sharing with him visual impressions and things, that he could not enjoy when he was blind. Now, he could only see through her eyes again, through her descriptions of the world around them.

Auggie had enjoyed being with Annie again. He loved her, but he had also felt her disappointment when he had told her, that he had gone blind again. There was not much he could do.

Auggie himself was also disappointed. He had enjoyed seeing all of the things that he had missed while he had lived in total darkness and now, the gift of sight had been taken away from him again.

Auggie had adapted to being blind long time ago, and although it had hurt him to lose his sight again, he quickly adapted to the state he had lived in for more than seven years. He could still read Braille, he could still walk with his cane and he could still be a valuable member of the CIA despite his severe visual disability. His „seeing adventure" had only been short for him. During this brief period of time as a sighted man, that had only lasted a bit more than three months, he had not unlearned all the skills of a blind person. So he quickly went back to his old blind-man habits.

Auggie walked to his closet and got dressed. He felt for the clothes tags in Braille. Today he opted for a more casual outfit. He picked dark-blue jeans, a blue sweater and a black leather belt. The day in Langley would be long, and he had no idea, when he would return home. When he was done, he grabbed his messenger bag and his cane from the credenza and left.

The first e-mails were already read and answered and Auggie was so deeply immersed into his work, that he almost didn´t realize, that someone had entered his office. The scent of a well-known aftershave reached his nostrils and he looked up into the direction, where he assumed the person to stand.

„Hey Eric" Auggie greeted with a smile. But Barber´s face was serious and a bit worried. This impression, however, was lost on Auggie and Barber was glad that his friend and colleague could not see that.

„I have heard it buddy, and I am sorry" Eric said and Auggie immediately understood what Barber was talking about.

„I am okay, don´t worry about me. The show must go on" Auggie said.

Barber shook his head a bit in disbelief of what he had just heard.

„How can you be so calm?" He asked and looked at Auggie in surprise.

„There is no sense in crying over spilled milk" Auggie said and added „Barber, I have been living in total darkness for quite a while now. I have gotten used to it. Of course, I would have loved to keep my sight forever, but this decision was not in my hands. But now, I am grateful for the time that I was able to spend seeing. It was like a vacation from my blindness and I enjoyed it. And as we all know, every vacation has to come to an end sooner or later. In my case, this is more than true. But I keep the memories of this vacation like a treasure inside"

Barber was at a loss for words. A lump had formed in his throat that he could not swallow. He was deeply touched, overwhelmed by the words of his boss and friend. Never before, he had heard Auggie talk so openly about his feelings as a blind guy.

He gave him a pat on his shoulder and said „Man, I am glad that you are able to take it this way"

And with these words he left and went back to his desk in the adjacent office.

„Where have you been?" Hollman asked when Eric returned.

„Had to pay our boss a visit" Barber mumbled, before he started typing on his keyboard again.

Hollman shook his head, unable to understand what had happened to his colleague. Already before, he had wondered that Barber obviously did not seem to be hungry. Today had been different. No chips, no pizza and no coke so far. This was a bad sign. His perpetually hungry colleague never missed a chance to nibble on something or to chew on all kinds of sweets and cakes. Hollman looked over to Eric and asked „Hey what´s up with you today? Are you sick? You don´t seem to be hungry at all and you are quiet as well"

„I am good" was the brief reply of Eric who didn´t even bother to look up from his screen. He was still thinking of Auggie and how sorry he was that his boss and friend had gone blind again. Auggie deserved better, he thought but it wasn´t in his power to decide that. He wished that he could help him, but there was no way that Eric could change it.

After Barber´s visit Auggie had continued working. He had felt that something was bothering Eric and he felt a bit guilty that everybody was obviously worried about him. He did not want to be the source of grief and sadness and above all, he did not want pity. He had accepted his life the way it ws and he tried to make the best of it despite all the adversities that life had in store for a blind person.

His mind went back to a conversation with his shrink more than two years ago. She had asked him what he did, if he was not up to meet the challenges of a life without sight. And he had answered „I keep going, because I have to" And that was what he did again. He kept going, because he had to. He did not give up. He was a soldier, a warrior and a fighter. He fought a daily battle as a blind man, trying to convince everyone in his surroundings that he was capable and a valuable employee for the CIA.

Half past six, Auggie shut down his computer. He had worked overtime again and Annie was out on a short mission until the next day. He knew how deeply touched she had been when he told her that he had lost his sight again and now he wanted to cheer her up a little. She needed some distraction and if he was honest, he could use that, too. He knew that Annie loved football as much as he did. She had taken him to a game shortly after they had met. She had assumed that he would not enjoy the game but he had proven her wrong. He had cheered as loud and enthusiastic as all the others although he could not see what was going on on the field.

Now he wanted to surprise her with a ticket for the game of her favourite team. And so, he called a friend, who worked at the ticket office and asked him to get him to tickets for the weekend game.

Annie would be back the following day, and the Saturday game was still two days away then.

Auggie grabbed his cane from the desk drawer and made his way to the door. He was tired and looking forward to an evening on his couch with some Mingus music and a cold beer.

But when he returned home, a surprise was waiting for him. But it was not the type of surprise, one would appreciate. Auggie tapped his way to his apartment door with his cane and when he fished out his keys and reached for the door, he realized it was open. A feeling of shock and horror came over him. He cautiously swept his cane. He was not sure whether there was still somebody in his flat. He listened carefully, but he could not hear any sound. Obviously he was alone. But when he continued walking, he stumbled over clothes on the floor, he came across Braille books on the kitchen floor when he swept his cane and discovered that his couch table and his credenza had also been tossed over.

He could not call the police. He was CIA and if the burglary had something to do with his job as a spy, he would have to answer unpleasant and awkward questions. So he took his cell phone out of his pocket and dialled Calders number.

Twenty minutes later, Calder Michaels appeared on Auggie´s doorstep and shook his head.

„Oh my goodness Auggie" he exclaimed when he looked at the mess in Auggie´s apartment.

„It looks like somebody has been looking for something here" The entire floor was covered with Braille books, filers, clothes, couch cushions etc. The kitchen cupboards were open, the bed was rumpled and the mattress was on the floor. Even Auggie´s Braille slate and stylus were on the floor together with his spare cane.

„It is not like I could see it" Auggie said and added with a roguish grin „The last time my apartment was in such a state, when you ransacked it, searching for the flash drive of Seth Newman."

Calder looked towards Auggie, grinned a bit and answered „Back then, I did not know that we were both on the same side. But I think that I have proved to you, that you can trust me now"

„Yes you have" Auggie said, feeling his way over to where Calder stood, still incredulous at the chaos in Auggie´s flat.