=]Author's Note!

Welcome or welcome back my beloveds!

I had honestly hoped to have had this chapter to you on Friday but my daughter apparently has decided that my designated writing time is her designated lap time. It's quite difficult to type around a wiggly two year old so my writing time has been moved to naptimes. That's how it goes sometimes though, right?

This is actually one of my favorite chapters that I've written so far. Hopefully you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.

I look forward to reading reviews (hint, hint, winks) and I really hope to hear from you all!

Now, I leave you to it. Enjoy!

ABD

********TRIGGER WARNING FOR THIS CHAPTER: This chapter does involve mentions and suggestions of physical abuse!***********

Chapter 6
A Weasley Christmas
24 December 2002
the Burrow
Ottery St. Catchpole

Christmas Eve with the Weasleys was everything that she had remembered it to be and more. Maybe it was because she'd gotten accustomed to spending it in misery. Either in pain or being paraded around on Daniel's arm amongst his coworkers. She remembered the years at Hogwarts where the holiday was spent either at the Burrow or at Grimauld Place. Either place was spent with an abundance of people with so much love and joy. Even in the midst of the war, the holidays seemed to be a time that everyone flourished.

After the last few Christmas's, Hermione wasn't quite sure exactly how she felt about the current one. It was undeniably wonderful to be back around this family. Even before Daniel's downturn she had truly missed the feeling of being surrounded in the love and familiar warmth that filled her to the brim. She had to admit though that she'd very nearly forgotten how packed the home got when everyone was present.

The Burrow was packed with every Weasley child and their partners and families. She was fairly certain she'd even heard Remus Lupin's weary voice carry in from the kitchen a short while ago. Most of the large group had packed into the warmly decorated living room awaiting Molly's call for dinner. Hermione found herself squeezed on the sofa between Ginny and Harry with Ron sitting on the floor with his back against their legs. She found it intriguing and adorable to see that he had Luna situated between his legs with her back against his chest. She had heard of the relationship but this was the first opportunity she'd had to witness it for herself. Conversation flowed easily between everyone with each talking to-and sometimes over-each other about what sounded like relevant every topic under the sun.

Despite the crowd, she didn't find herself as overwhelmed as she had feared she would. She was still on edge, of course, but not nearly what she had been anticipating. Perhaps it was because of the three people sitting almost protectively around her. She was truly thankful to have such amazing set of friends. A glance around to her friends had her unconsciously wrapping an arm securely around her ever swelling abdomen in thought of how amazingly supportive each had been in their own way. Ginny had always been the sister she never biologically had and the girl had well and truly fit the role over the past few weeks. The two witches had grown closer than Hermione had thought was even possible and she couldn't be more pleased about it. Ron was doing his best to watch his words and actions. It seemed as though he had truly taken to heart the things that she and Harry had shared with him.

Harry. She smiled affectionately and looked back to the friend in question. She truly cherished their friendship. Somehow he had become a sort of anchor to her since her return. She had a feeling that, if he could get away with it, he would likely try to attach himself firmly next to her if he thought it would help. Where she felt she could tell Ginny just about anything, she had begun to feel safe with Harry even when she was in a pit of her worst. He somehow seemed to instinctively know how to pull her back out of her attacks. They were still far more frequent than she would prefer to admit but he seemed to have such an easy time helping her to handle them.

That frightened her a bit though. She felt almost as though she was becoming dependent on him even if just for the feeling of safety. It made her weary to trust anyone so thoroughly for any reason. And the fact that she struggled to resist falling into the security that he seemed to offer frightened her even further. The simple fact that she was so weary and suspicious of him just made her angry with herself. It was a cycle she wasn't quite sure how to break at the moment.

Hermione was brought from her straying thoughts by Molly's call to dinner and it seemed at once the relatively calm string of conversation came to an abrupt halt and chaos took its place. Her eyes widened in surprise as all Weasleys-biological and those wed into the family-save the four that were surrounding her, rose and made their way towards the promise of food. Of course, being the Weasley's it was not done in any way that might be considered an orderly fashion. The twins, clearly caught in the festive spirit, made a point to push past each other and the rest of the family to get to be the first at the table.

Though, again, being the twins would not leave it as something as simple as just pushing their way to the front. The duo had evidently planned ahead and planted trick garland among what had already been decorating the living room. Hermione found herself watching with a sense of morbid curiosity as the planted garland snaked out and wrapped around unsuspecting ankles causing what amounted to a dogpile of Weasley's in the doorway to the kitchen. Over which the twins promptly leapt, shoving one another all the while.

Hermione bit her lip to stifle the giggle at the chaos the twins left in their wake. She could feel the shaking on either side of her that told her both Harry and Ginny where attempting to do the same. As the rest of the family slowly untangled themselves from one another-during which Hermione was certain that she'd heard a few uttered curses aimed toward Fred and George-Harry, Ginny, Ron and Luna got to their feet pulling her up along with them, each of them still doing their best to hide their amusement.

As had become usual, Harry reached for her but was nudged aside when Luna hooked her arm around the same arm that Harry was making to reach for. Both Harry and Hermione blinked in mild surprise though one expression was tinted with amused affection while the other was laced with a poorly hidden disappointment. Luna paid no attention to either, however, and tugged Hermione forward with her towards the kitchen. When she had pulled them a few steps ahead of the trio behind them, the blonde witch offered a soothing smile "Shall we take a walk after we're through eating?"

Hermione nodded slowly, examining the blonde's face for a moment. She and Luna had only spoken a few times very briefly throughout the few weeks since her return. The suddenness and seemingly randomness of the offer reminded her, however, that Luna had always been much more perceptive and understanding than many would give her credit for. She was disappointed to realize that she had been included in that category at one time. Gathering a touch of courage she returned the other witch's smile and nodded once again. "Yes, I think that would be nice."

The group of friends made their way to the table with Harry and Ron having taken the lead. The two men hurried to their seats leaving Hermione to take the one directly between Ginny and Luna. Though the girls had yet to take their seats when dual yelps were heard from across the table. It seemed that the tricky garland was just the twins' warm up act, if Harry and Ron's scowls were any indication, not mentioning that both were rubbing their, now tender, backsides. A quick glance to the redhead next to her confirmed her suspicion. Ginny had narrowed her eyes at her brothers as she pulled her own wand and tested all three seats that they had been about to take.

"Take it off," Ginny stated firmly.

"Take what off, sister dear?" Fred asked, smiling innocently.

"Oh, don't worry Ginny, we're safe now," Luna said with one of her serene smiles before tucking her own wand away and guiding the other two witches to their seats. Once seated she turned her gaze to the stumped expressions that the twins were sharing. "That was really quite clever though, wasn't it? Modifying and linking a Stinging Hex with a Notice-Me-Not. Yes, quite clever."

Seeing the girls had indeed taken their seats without trouble, Harry and Ron made to retake their own only to yelp and jump up sharply once more. It quickly set the table off in a bought of laughter at their expense. The two wizards glared before setting about removing the spells from their seats, something they had automatically assumed that Luna had done at the same time she had neutralized those on the three seats opposite them.

"Gee thanks, Luna, way to keep us hanging," Ron pouted to his girlfriend as he and Harry finally-but very carefully-retook their seats, causing another round of laughter to erupt around the table.

After that, dinner was blessedly uneventful. Loud but uneventful. Hermione was pleasantly surprised that she felt so at ease considering the crowded nature of the meal. Conversations were exchanged and no one was left out of it. It had been so incredibly long since she had laughed so hard and smiled so much. By the time dinner and dessert had concluded both her cheeks and her sides ached from the pure joy of it all.

As everyone began to disperse and regroup back in the living room, Hermione felt a tug on her arm. Luna subtly nodded towards the door and Hermione gave a small smile and nod in understanding and agreement. Without a word being spoken, Luna snagged Ginny's arm and the three quickly bundled up and made their way outside. It wasn't long before Hermione found herself back in the same spot that she, Harry, and Ron had been when she'd informed them of her pregnancy. After a quickly muttered warming charm, the trio of witches lowered themselves to the ground.

"How is our little nephew treating you, Hermione?" Luna asked with one of her smiles.

Hermione's eyes widened and her arms wrapped protectively around her belly. She had thought she had been discrete! Had Ron told her? He promised that he wouldn't tell until she was ready for it. She paused for a moment to study the two witches sitting with her. Ginny was watching Luna with an expression of weary acceptance but said nothing. Luna, on the other hand, simply smiled knowingly.

Hermione briefly felt guilty at the automatic assumption that Ron had spilled the news. It was Luna. Of course she knew. She'd probably known all along but was kind enough to pull her aside before actually talking about it. She felt a rush of affection towards the blonde witch and gave a sheepish smile before finally answering. "The baby's been awfully wiggly but it still doesn't feel like much more than a bad case of butterflies. How do you know that it's a boy?"

"You don't?" Luna asked, tilting her head in question.

"I suppose that I've had a feeling but my appointment isn't until just after the New Year for me to know for sure either way," Hermione admitted. "That still doesn't explain how you know?"

Luna simply smiled and shrugged, "I can see it. It's faint yet but his aura has begun to bleed into yours. I noticed a change in yours when we first met up in Diagon Alley a few weeks ago. At first I just attributed it to what you've gone through, horrible really, but then each time that I have seen you since then it has grown stronger instead of weaker and it is slightly separate from yours. I'm frightfully ashamed to not have understood correctly from the start."

"Why did you say our nephew?" Ginny asked curiously before her eyes widened and a grin spread across her face, "Did Ron…Did he actually do it? He proposed?"

"No, not yet," Luna replied with an unaffected air. "He's such a lovely man but subtlety has never been one of his strengths. He also has a tendency to fall back into forgetting that I am quite a bit more perceptive than what he might consider normal." Then with a slightly smug smirk, the blonde continued, "It does help, though, that I may have accidentally found the ring. Lovely thing. It will suit me quite well when he does decide to ask. I'm thinking it will probably be New Years. Such a sweet man."

The rarely seen smugness sent all three witches into a fit of giggles. When they finally regained themselves, Ginny and Hermione wrapped Luna in a tight hug. "Early congratulations, Luna. I'm very happy for both of you," Hermione murmured.

"Thank you, Hermione. Though I should say an early congratulations to you as well, don't you think? I suppose, though, I've got a number of months left to offer congratulations, don't I?"

Hermione chuckled and shrugged, "Yes, I suppose so."

"Now that we've got that out of the way, are you going to tell us what's bothering you, Hermione?" Luna asked, moving behind the witch in question to start pulling her curly hair into a snug braid.

"What do you mean?" Hermione frowned. It'd been a delightful day, one she'd be quite hard pressed to remember one that would beat it.

"Before dinner, I had noticed that you'd gone away for a bit and I could tell whatever it was that took you away-I'm guessing nargles as it is that time of year-clearly had you troubled," Luna stated with surprising firmness.

Despite whether or not Hermione agreed with nargles or any other such creature, she could not deny that Luna saw things much clearer than most. Her thoughts and concerns from earlier made their way back through her mind and she sighed heavily before raising her gaze to meet Ginny's before lowering it again. "I…I'm still battling a lot of fears and insecurities from…from everything. It's still very difficult for me to trust that I am safe."

"What else?" Luna pressed gently.

"I…I'm a little afraid of Harry right now," She admitted. She felt more than saw the other two witches exchange silent glances and couldn't say that she was remotely surprised when it was Ginny who spoke next.

"Can I ask why? I would understand if it were Ron, what with his short fused temper or even any other of my brothers with their rowdiness but I don't quite understand a fear of Harry," Ginny asked, expression as puzzled as her tone of voice.

"I…It's just that…oh how do I explain it," Hermione groaned before taking a moment to gather her thoughts in order to best present her current struggles. "Ginny, the three of you…you, Ron, and Harry, have been so amazingly supportive and helpful. Each in your own ways and I feel so incredibly blessed for it. It's just that…Harry's sort of become my anchor over the last month or so. When he's around, he's always right there like my rock. When I have an attack he seems to know exactly how to pull me back out of it. And it frightens me. It frightens me because I can feel myself becoming reliant on him for those things. It frightened to feel safe when it's outside of myself. I'm frightened to trust the feeling of safety. I…I guess it's not exactly Harry that I'm afraid of but I'm afraid of relying so heavily on anyone."

Luna tied off the finished braid with a conjured red ribbon and moved to sit beside her friend, "I think I can understand the issue, Hermione, but surely you know that shutting yourself off to prevent yourself from becoming too close to anyone is as unhealthy as the opposite? I don't pretend to know what you've gone through and how your mind is processing things but now, of all times, it is actually completely acceptable to lean on those around you. That's what we're here for, after all. I don't think that you're relying too heavily on anyone but, rather, relying just enough to hold yourself on your feet until you're able to do it on your own. And there's nothing wrong with that."

Ginny, who had moved to sit on Hermione's opposite side, nodded in agreement. "Hermione, we all love you. I don't know that you quite understand yet just how important you are to this family. Your importance to Mum and Dad is no different than any of us who were born naturally to them. Harry loves you too. We all just hate to see that you're hurting and struggling. That's why we've put ourselves out there to let you lean on us. We're not and haven't been the types to use that to manipulate or control you. We're the types to love and support you. You and the baby when he gets here."

Hermione gave a watery smile, cursing her chaotic emotions once again, and nodded, "I know. I know none of you would turn it all around back on me. It just seems that panic and paranoia have found a way to silence the logic. Logically, I know all of that but…but the fear makes it difficult to trust logic."

"And we'll continue to be there for you until, and long after, logic finally makes its stand again. All of us will be," Luna smiled warmly.

A short while later, the three witches made their way back to the house, reveling in the warmth it provided in comparison to the cold December evening and a Warming Charm that had begun to fade as their conversation had drawn to an end. They made their way towards the rowdy laughter carrying from the living room.

Hermione made to follow the other two but felt a gentle tug on the sleeve of her jumper. Startled, she turned sharply to find Charlie Weasley standing awkwardly next to her. Brows furrowed in confused curiosity, she tilted her head in question at the second eldest Weasley son.

"Do you mind if I have a quick word with you, Hermione?" He asked cautiously.

Her confusion turned to weariness but her curiosity remained strong so she gave a small nod and followed him into the empty kitchen, each taking seats on an opposite side. She remained silent waiting to figure out what he wanted to speak with her about. Charlie was the Weasley she had the least amount of knowledge about or interaction with. What with him working and living in Romania, she had only seen him once every few years or so.

"Hermione, I know we've really not spoken much, or at all really, but I really do feel like I owe you a major apology," Charlie said, tone somber.

"An apology? Whatever for?" Hermione asked, stunned and even further confused. Her mind kicked into overdrive trying to understand his statement, going over ever interaction the two had ever shared in hopes of understanding.

He shifted uncertainly in his seat and sighed heavily, "I worked directly with Daniel for five years before you were introduced. I knew he could be manipulative when the mood struck but it always seemed relatively harmless. I swear to you, had I had any idea that he'd…..that you'd get stuck in a mess because of him, I swear I'd have made it known right off. I'm sorry, Hermione, I'm very sorry that even with knowing him as long as I did, I'd not been able to pick that out from him and not spared you the harm."

Hermione blinked in shocked surprise. She had entirely forgotten that Daniel had worked with Charlie in Romania prior to the start of their relationship. She studied the man sitting across from her. He truly did look remorseful and guilty. Neither of which she had ever even considered assigning to him. Even at her lowest. She felt a tug at her heart for Charlie Weasley.

Hesitantly, she reached across the table and placed one of her small hands over his much larger one. When he lifted his head to look at her, she offered a small but gentle smile. "Charlie, thank you for talking to me. But really, you've no reason to apologize, not at all. I put absolutely no blame on you or anyone else in this house. Truthfully, had you told me, I can't be sure I would have listened anyway. Just about everyone else had tried to get me to see reason at one point or another and I acted anyway."

He gave a heavy sigh of relief and patted the hand covering his with his free one and nodded. "Thank you. I'm sure you've heard all of that before from others in the family but I just feel like I should have been able to stop it before it started. I should have been able to see it after working and living with the man for so long."

"What's done is done, Charlie. Can I ask how you knew about it to begin with, though?" Hermione asked tentatively.

The redhead shifted uncomfortably once again and ran a hand through his hair, "There was some talk on the Reserve. That he'd died…" he winced heavily and avoided her eyes, "well…the actual talk was that he was…well murdered. Your name came up a few times. And well…I can't say I've known you well but the family's always spoken highly of you and it didn't really seem to fit what I knew about you…so I did some searching to, you know, figure out what really happened. Once I started looking, it was actually surprisingly easy to find the related reports on the muggle side. Then Mum sent a letter that mentioned that you were back but the tone of the letter sounded off. I kinda started putting things together and…well…I wasn't really all that impressed with the answers that I came up with."

"Oh," Hermione said, stunned. She wasn't quite sure which part of his story to focus on first. It was disheartening to learn that most of his former co-workers thought her a murderer but it was also rather warming that Charlie seemed to have gone out of his way to figure out the truth rather than taking belief in what he'd heard. She didn't think she'd have been able to blame him much had he believed it. He'd known Daniel far better than he'd known her, after all. At least now she had a start of an idea of what the Wizarding World was saying and believing about her.

"Thank you for telling me, Charlie, and for going out of your way to find out the true story," She said, quietly. He offered an understanding nod and smile before he stood from his seat, offering a hand to help her do the same.

She returned his smile before making her way towards the living room, her mind spinning with all of the new information. She retook her original seat between Harry and Ginny nodding calmly when Harry arched a brow in silent question. She was fine, she just had information to ponder over. Between her earlier conversation with Ginny and Luna and the one she'd just had with Charlie, her mind was on overdrive attempting to process it all.

Later that night, sleep was slow to find her. Every conversation she'd had throughout the day spun through her mind so chaotically that she couldn't even find it in herself to be excited about spending the following morning surrounded by family once more. After hours of lying there, staring at the ceiling, sleep finally took her. Unfortunately for her, it wasn't the peaceful sleep she had slowly become used to having.

25 December 2002
the Burrow
Ottery St. Catchpole

One night, after she'd finished dinner and dishes and the rest of the normal cleaning routine, she curled on the floor in front of the fire, drawing comfort and warmth from the dancing flames. She heard the door to his office slam open and she cringed, but knowing what was coming, she knew better than to move.

It wasn't until hands tangled in her knotted mass of curls and jerked her upright that she lifted her gaze to him. He had four envelopes in his hands and glowered darkly at her, "When have you been writing them?" He barked.

"W-write who?" she asked, eyes wide. Who did he think she'd been writing? She jerked sharply when the back of his hand collided with her face sending her one direction while his other hand held her by her hair.

"Now is not a time to play stupid with me, Hermione. Your friends. When did you write them? When did you write Potter? I thought I told you to stay out of my office," he said, his grip on her hair became extremely painful.

"I…I haven't. I haven't heard from or spoken to Harry or anyone else in over a year," Hermione cried out. He jerked her head again trying to draw the truth from her. "I swear I haven't."

Daniel's eyes narrowed and he studied her before throwing the envelopes into the flickering flames, which engulfed them immediately, "See those, Hermione? Eventually, they're going to forget you exist. Better yet, they're going to hate you for abandoning them."

She blinked back tears as she stared at the burning letters. Harry had tried to contact her? Four times? They still thought about her! Her heart swelled as tears streamed down her face. To Daniel, it would look as though she were finally giving up the last broken piece of her. To Hermione, it was solidifying her resolve to at least try and find a way out of this mess.

She closed her eyes and clenched her teeth as the second, third and fourth blow shook her to her core. She cried out and moaned and groaned in all the right times and places but, truthfully, her body was numb, she no longer felt the pain that he caused her. The crack of each broken bone rattled her ears, the blow that caused each heavy and deep bruise shook her frame but none of the pain registered in her mind. Six months or more of this brought her to a point where she just…was. She didn't exist. She didn't' feel. She just was.

"How'll you play this off as self-defense? You planned it. It's premeditated, Hermione," he taunted.

"The proof of my self-defense story is written all over my face and body, Daniel. Thanks to your temper tantrum last night," she said, keeping the gun pointed at his heart.

"Then do it, shoot me," he said, taking a step forward to where the nose of the gun was pushing into his chest. "Shoot me, Hermione." She hesitated for a moment too long and his hand grasped hers and he tried to pull the gun from her hands.

A tug-of-war match pursued and Hermione knew she'd only last so long, she knew he was stronger than her. She felt the pistol being turned inward, being turned in towards herself. With nothing other than a surge of panic she pushed out and pulled the trigger at the same time.

BANG!

The sound shook her to her core and she froze, eyes wide in terror. His grip on the pistol slackened as he collapsed to the ground his face contorted in pain. Blood poured from the exit wound in his back, spilling out over the kitchen floor.

"Bitch," he hissed as he pressed his hands to his chest. With one burst of energy he reached up and snagged her hands, "My blood's on your hands Hermione. How's that make you feel?" With that his last breath escaped his body and he was gone.

"Hermione?! Hermione, wake up, love."

Slowly she was pulled from her terrors, opening her eyes to see Ginny leaning over her, perched on the edge of the bed. She shuddered and ran trembling hands over her face to try to smother out what remained of her fear soaked dreams. "I-I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake you," she stammered quietly, slowly pulling herself into a sitting position.

"It's alright, don't worry about that, Hermione," Ginny said gently, reaching across to brush curly hair that had come loose from Luna's braid away from Hermione's face. "Want to talk about it?"

"No, not really," Hermione said, honestly. "I think I'd just gone to bed with too much going on in my mind, is all. I'm alright. You can go back to sleep if you want."

Ginny shook her head and shrugged, "It's already half seven anyway. We'll probably want to head down stairs before the twins show up and pull some sort of stunt to get everyone out of bed. Mum's already up making breakfast. You go on and get ready, I'll be down stairs helping her finish up."

Hermione nodded with a smile at the prospect of seeing what the twins would have planned for that day. Once Ginny had left the room, she got up and gathered her things for a shower-making sure she had everything she needed this time. After a quick shower and a charm to help tame her hair, she risked a glance at herself in the mirror once more. Her belly was no longer barely noticeable. Had she not been wearing a fairly baggy jumper the day before, she'd have no doubts that everyone would have noticed the roundedness of it. As she studied her reflection, she felt a twitch in her belly. So unlike the popping corn sensation that she found herself utterly frozen waiting for it to happen again just to make sure that she hadn't imagined it.

And then it happened again.

Carefully but curiously, she brushed her shaking hand over her belly where the feeling had originated from and gasped when she felt it from both the inside and against her hand. At that moment, emotions began to war within her. She felt an overwhelming sensation of excitement and awe tapered by feelings of confusion and weariness. Looking up to the reflection of her face, she noticed that her outward expression mirrored her inner turmoil. She saw a hesitant smile and brightened eyes combined with furrowed brows and tears running down her cheeks. She'd not realized when she had started crying and quickly blotted the tears and put effort into bringing her expression back to neutral before quickly dressing and leaving the bathroom.

After putting her things back in the room she was sharing with Ginny, Hermione quickly made her way down the stairs. Pausing only once when she felt another movement. Shaking herself from the daze she entered the kitchen that was currently occupied by the other three witches. Offering a smile, she quickly set about preparing a cup of coffee, figuring she needed it after the poor quality sleep from the night before, only to have the mug pulled from her hand and replaced by an already prepared cup of tea.

Frowning upwards and ready to scold whoever had taken her much-needed caffeine, she saw Luna smile pleasantly to her while drinking the coffee herself. She narrowed her eyes slightly when the hand that was holding the coffee extended the index finger and shook it back and forth in what Hermione recognized to be a "naughty, naughty" expression. Luna grinned impishly at her expression.

"Happy Christmas, Hermione!" the blonde chirped brightly. Hermione thought she was entirely too perky for being the one who stole her coffee.

Molly chuckled and patted her shoulder before settling a plate of toast in front of her, "Now, now, dearie, you know that you ought not be having coffee, don't you?"

Hermione sighed and her scowl turned into a mild pout, causing the other women to start laughing. They all stopped laughing abruptly when Hermione's slumped figure suddenly shot upright, her eyes wide in surprise, having been caught off guard by another movement. Quickly she grabbed the closest free hand to her, which happened to be Luna's, and positioned it on her belly directly over where the movement could be felt.

Luna gasped and her expression lit up brightly speaking in an awed voice barely above a whisper, "Oh, Hermione! Ginny, Molly, he's moving!"

Hermione was suddenly surrounded on all sides with three separate hands being placed lovingly on her belly. Not one of the witches spoke another word, they just reveled in the movement of what would soon be the newest family addition. Hermione looked at each witch individually. Smiling to herself when she saw Ginny's expression matching Luna's and a glisten of tears and a loving smile on Molly.

She had originally thought to keep this to herself for a while, until she had gotten used to it. But here, now, seeing their expressions, she was so incredibly glad that she didn't.