We see the sorrow and the pain
We tried our best to save the world
But everyday is still the same
All the violence all the blood and every tear
Fill your minds more and more with hate and fear
We fight against everything and everyone
With every war we tried to make our kingdom come
Everyday we lose ourselves more and more
But still we pray for someone to save our souls.
BLOODLUST
There was AC/DC in the cassette player – Back In Black to be exact, which was fitting, a bright sunny day outside, and the two most important men to me in the world in the front seat. Today was a good day.
"Whoo!" Dean exclaimed as he rocketed the newly restored Impala down the small 2-lane highway passing green fields and wood. "Listen to her purr! Have you ever heard anything so sweet?" He was grinning from ear to ear.
I smiled to myself in the back seat, pleased to see him happy for a change. It had been a really hard month on all of us, but it felt like maybe we were starting to come out of the shadow, just a little bit. Having the Impala back helped to restore a little normality to our lives, it felt good.
"You know, if you two want to get a room, just let us know, Dean." I said with a smirk from the back seat.
"Oh don't listen to her, baby," Dean said to the car. "They doesn't understand us."
Sam chuckled and shook his head. "You're in a good mood!" He said. Dean was smiling, actually smiling and looking happy. I had to agree with Sam.
"Why shouldn't I be?" Dean asked, looking over at him with a frown.
"No reason." Sam said with a shrug.
Dean looked in the mirror at me, and I threw him a smile. "Got my car, got my girl, got a case – things are looking up." Dean said with a smile.
"Wow..." Sam said. "You hear of a couple of severed heads and a pile of dead cows, and you're Mister Sunshine." I chuckled at that, he certainly was in a good mood.
Dean chuckled. "How far to Red Lodge?" He asked, looking at me in the mirror.
I glanced down at the map and made a quick estimate. "Uh, about another three hundred miles." I said, looking up at him.
He smiled. "Good." And then floored the Impala, rocketing us down the road.
Red Lodge, Montana
Sheriff's Office
We were posing as reporters, hoping to get some more information out of the Sheriff. The case was kind of a big note so we didn't think our usual FBI cover would work considering chances were they were already hanging around.
The Sheriff had an impressive looking moustache and sat behind his desk, looking organised and calm while he spoke to us.
"The murder investigation is ongoing, and that's all I can share with the press at this time," he said to us, looking a little impatient.
"Sure, sure, we understand that, but just for the record, you found the first, uh, head last week, correct?" Sam said, sitting there with his paper and pen.
"Mm-hmm," the Sheriff nodded.
"OK, and the other, Christina Flanigan..." Sam trailed off, prompting for information.
"That was two days ago. Is there..." We were interrupted by a young woman knocking at the door, pointing at her watch. "Oh, sorry, time's up, we're done here."
"One last question..." Sam asked, looking at the Sheriff.
"Yeah, what about the cattle?" Dean asked, impatiently.
"Excuse me?" The Sheriff asked, looking at Dean.
"You know, the cows found dead, split open, drained... over a dozen cases." Dean elaborated.
"What about them?" The Sheriff asked, looking confused.
"You don't think there's a connection?" I asked, looking up from my notes.
"Connection... with..." The Sheriff was clearly not following our line of questioning.
"First cattle mutilations, now two murders? Kind of sounds like ritual stuff," I pointed out to him.
"You know, like satanic cult ritual stuff." Dean said, looking at the Sheriff.
The Sheriff laughed, looking at us all, and then, seeing our faces he fell silent. "You – you're not kidding?"
"No." Dean said, serious.
"Those cows aren't being mutilated. You wanna know how I know?" The Sheriff asked.
"How?" Sam asked, curious.
"Because there's no such thing as cattle mutilation. Cow drops, leave it in the sun, within forty eight hours the bloat will split it open so clean it's just about surgical. The body fluids fall down into the ground and get soaked up because that's what gravity does. But, hey, it could be Satan. What newspaper did you say you work for?"
"World Weekly News," Dean said.
"Weekly World News," I corrected Dean with a raised eyebrow.
"World..." Dean started again.
"Weekly World..." Sam interrupted.
"Weekly... I'm new." Dean shrugged, looking apologetic.
"Get out of my office." The Sheriff said pointedly.
We walked back to the car, Dean going over the newspaper name aloud a few more times.
"World Weekly News... World Weekly News. Wait. Weekly World News?" He said, looking at me puzzled. I shook my head and patted him on the back.
"Don't worry about it Clark Kent, it's not like we're actually going to be submitting something to be published, and I smiled, skipping back to the car.
"Where to next?" I asked, leaning against the new finish on the Impala.
"Time to check out the morgue." Dean said with a grin and I nodded. It was good to be back on the job.
Hospital
Morgue
We helped ourselves to a few lab coats on the way down to the morgue, pulling them on over our regular clothing – making us look a little more professional. I pulled my hair up in to a ponytail as I led the way into the morgue. There was an intern on duty, I noticed it read J. Manners. I looked at it, calculating what his name might be, and went with the most obvious.
"John," I smiled at him.
"Jeff," he corrected, but he still gave me a smile.
I leaned forward on the desk with another smile. "Jeff, right, I know that. Look, Dr. Dworkin needs to see you in his office right away." I said, tilting my head to the side.
"But Dr Dworkin's on vacation." Jeff replied, looking confused.
"Well, he's back," Dean said from behind me. "And he's pissed, and he's screaming for you man, so if I were you I would..." Jeff was already running out the door by the time Dean got half his sentence out.
"OK then!" I said, flipping my hair behind me. "Those Satanists in Florida, they marked their victims, didn't they?" I asked handing the boys some latex gloves and heading for the refrigerated drawers against the far wall.
"Yeah, reversed pentacle on the forehead." Sam replied.
"Yeah. So much f—d up crap happens in Florida," Dean muttered, slipping his hands into the gloves.
Sam pointed to the refrigerated compartment containing the first victim and I opened it, wheeling out the corpse. I looked curiously at the box between the victims legs, somehow I thought this might be where we would find the head of the victim. I grimaced.
"All right, open it," Dean said to me and I stared at him.
"You open it." I said with a raised eyebrow. Sam rolled his eyes at the pair of us.
"Wuss." Dean teased me, carrying the box over to another table and flipping off the lid with a grimace. I walked over with Sam and screwed up my nose.
"Well, no pentagram." Dean announced, looking inside the box.
"Wow, poor girl." I said, looking at the head.
"Maybe we should, uh, you know, look in her mouth, see if those wackos stuffed anything down her throat. You know, kinda like the moth in Silence of the Lambs." Dean was looking at me with a twinkle in his eyes, waiting to see how far he could push me before I decided it was time to go throw up my lunch.
"Yeah, sure, go ahead Dean," I said with a smile, sliding the box toward him.
"No, you go ahead." He said with a raised eyebrow, pushing the box back at me.
"Well someone go ahead." Sam said with a shake of his head.
"'Put the lotion in the basket'" Dean said to me, and I wrinkled my nose.
"I hated that movie," I said with a frown. Dean just smiled.
"Right, yeah, I'm the wuss, huh? Whatever." I looked down at the head staring up at me and grimaced. I poked my fingers into her mouth and felt around, looking at Sam who was looking a little green around the gills.
"Hey Sam, get me a bucket?" I asked, looking over at him.
"You find something?" Dean asked, curious.
"Nope, I'm gonna puke." I said with a scrunched up nose. I pulled my fingers out and shook my head, nothing.
"Wait, lift the lip up again?" Dean asked, looking down at the head.
"What? You want me to throw up, is that it?" I asked with a raised eyebrow.
"No, no, no I think I saw something," he said, looking closer. He pulled back the lip, inspecting it a bit more thoroughly. "What is that, a hole?" He muttered, I was curious, my vomit reflex now gone as we looked into the box.
I pressed down on the gum where he'd indicated and a narrow, sharp tooth descended out of the gum.
"It's a tooth." Sam said, looking over at us.
"Sam, that's a fang. Retractable set of vampire fangs, you've got to be kidding." I said, frowning.
"Well this changes things." Sam said with a stunned look.
"Ya think?" Dean asked with a sarcastic look.
Motel Room
We decided to wait until dark to go check out one of the local bars for information, that way there'd be more of a chance of talking to someone who might have actually come across the vampires.
Until then we had time to kill. I picked up one of the machetes off the bed and testing the weight in my hand, doing a couple of forward swings.
Dean raised an eyebrow at me, and got up from his position on the other bed. Grabbing the other machete he nodded and indicated I should follow him out the rear door of the room, where there was a bit of a courtyard. No one was around, so we had the space to ourselves.
"You been practising?" He asked with a grin starting to circle around me as I stood in one place, watching him. I rotated my neck a bit to loosen up my neck muscles and shrugged my shoulders a little. My hair was pulled back in a ponytail out of my face, and I was wearing simple black leggings, blue tank top, and boots that were soft and flexible, great for sparring.
"What do you think?" I asked, looking at him with narrowed eyes, trying to keep from laughing at his ridiculous eye of the tiger thing he had going on. I willed myself to centre a bit, focus on my breathing, the feel of the weapon in my hand, and my awareness of where Dean was in the courtyard.
He knew damn well that I hadn't been, for the simple fact that it was generally him who I sparred with. Up until recently, machetes and beheading hadn't really been something we considered a priority – we hadn't even known vampires existed until last month, and we'd kind of been busy hunting demons since then.
Dean was cocky though, he was a far more superior fighter than me, and he knew it, but that didn't mean I didn't have skills of my own. Suddenly Dean lunged at me from behind, swinging his machete down at my shoulder, I spun, raising mine up to counter, the blades meeting as I pivoted on my right foot and kicked out with my left, pushing him back from me with a grunt.
We separated, both circling and facing each other, he'd dropped the smile, getting into the sparring mood. "We playing for keeps this time?" He asked, which was his way of saying, does anything go, or are we just mucking around. I nodded silently, eyes staring at him and he smirked. "Well all right then."
He swung wide at me a couple of times, and I blocked each time, forcing him back into a defensive stance. A few forward swings from me and he dodged them, parrying one that got a little too close to his stomach for comfort.
I stared into those hazel eyes and feinted left before swinging to the right, smacking the flat of my blade against his ass as he turned slightly in the wrong direction to counter my first move. He scowled and whistled at me in appreciation. "Fast..." he commented, and I grinned at him.
He swung at me in three swift motions, I blocked two but found myself pushed up against the wall of the motel, blade to my throat, breathing hard with the third attack. I dropped my machete, looking him in the eyes. "But not fast enough." He breathed in my ear, face pressed alongside mine. I turned my lips to his cheek and kissed him quickly before bringing my knee up in a crushing blow to his groin.
Dean doubled over, groaning and with both hands now free, I grabbed his arm, swinging him around and using the momentum of his body to flip him on his back with a thud. He dropped his machete with a clatter against the stones and let out a breath, winded. I straddled him, pinning him to the courtyard pavement, hands holding down his as I leaned over him.
He laid back on the ground and groaned a little before raising his eyes to look at me. "You're holding back," I said to him, a little disappointed. I never won unless he did, but we both knew that wasn't the point. In the real world, the creatures didn't hold back, and I needed to be able to hold my own. He frowned and then pushed me off him, both of us rising to our feet.
Dean went to pick up our machetes, tossing one to me so that the handle was pointing down. We'd practised this a lot, never knew when you might need to get each other a blade quickly, it was one thing we had mastered. I caught the machete deftly with my right hand and swung it in the air in front of me.
I lunged and went on the attack, Dean easily blocking all my moves. It was a flurry of sweat, kicks, and blades for a good few continuous minutes while I tested out the feel of my body with the machete. Finally, we grew tired and pulled apart. Dean was grimacing, I started to wonder if I'd hurt him when I kneed him, and I hesitated, stepping forward to check on him.
I dropped my guard, lowering the machete to walk over to him, a worried look on my face. He cried out victoriously and disarmed me, quickly bringing both machetes up to either side of my neck. I froze and frowned at him. Dean stared at me without any amusement in his eyes. "Never...let...your...guard...down." He said humourlessly. "Not even to me – I could be a shapeshifter, or a demon wearing my meat suit, you don't know." I gulped and nodded, he was right. "Are we done?" He asked, again I nodded.
He dropped the machetes and smiled at me. "You did good," he praised me and I smiled hesitantly. He pulled me into a headlock and kissed the top of my head. I leaned in to him and closed my eyes. "Man, did you have to knee me in the gonads though? I was hoping to use them tonight!" He chuckled and I laughed.
"Hmmm, well maybe I'll have to kiss them better for you," I said suggestively and skipped ahead of him to the door into our room.
Dean groaned and shook his head, "You're a tease!"
I raised an eyebrow, "I learn from the best," I winked, and headed for the shower, stripping as I went to give him a bit of a show.
"Oh man, she's trouble," Dean said looking at Sam who was giving us an amused stare as I wandered past in pants and bra. "She's trouble!" He chased me into the bathroom with a laugh.
Local Bar
Dean slung his arm around my shoulder as we entered the bar and nodded at the dartboard. "Hmmm, maybe we got time for a game or two?" He said with a smile. I inclined my head at him, liking this return to old Dean.
"Sounds like a plan," I said, nodding. Sam shook his head and walked ahead of us to the bar, taking a seat.
"How's it going?" Sam asked, nodding to the bartender.
I was pulling the darts out of the board, preparing for a little practice. It was near enough to the bar that I could follow the conversation, Sam could handle it.
"Living the dream. What can I get for you?" The bartender asked him.
"Three beers, please." Dean answered, putting a twenty on the counter and looking over at me.
"So, we're looking for some people," Sam started, looking at the bartender who gave him a smirk.
"Sure. Hard to be lonely," he said and Sam frowned.
"Yeah. But um, that's not what I meant." He pulled a fifty dollar bill out of his wallet, smoothing it out, and then dropped it on the bar. The bartender took it, stuffing it in his pocket giving Sam a questioning look.
"Right." Sam said with a nod. "So these, these people, they would have moved here about six months ago, probably pretty rowdy, like to drink..."
"Yeah, real night owls, you know? Sleep all day, party all night." Dean added, taking a drink out of his beer and wandering over to hand me mine. I'd finished my shots and was looking at the results happily. Bobby had a dart board at the house, my game was back.
The bartender gave us all an intrigued look before answering. "Barker Farm got leased out a couple months ago. Real winners. They've been in here a lot – drinkers. Noisy. I've had to 86 them once or twice."
"Thanks," Dean said with a nod and took his turn with the darts. His score was still better than mine and I frowned.
Sam cleared his throat, stepping away from his half-finished beer and gave us a look, inclining his head to the door.
"Awww, really Sammy?" I complained, taking a swig of my own beer. He sighed, Dean and I exchanged a resigned look and left our beers on the table nearby. He was such a stick in the mud sometimes. We left the bar. I headed for the Impala which was parked in the lot out back, leading us down the dark alley toward the steps.
I reached the car ahead of the boys, they'd slowed down for some reason and I was suddenly very alert. Dean gestured for me to get down so I ducked behind the Impala, watching from my hiding place. The boys ducked behind another car and we watched as a man can stalking around the corner, looking around.
He was African-American with a super short hair cut, moustache, goatee, and deep dark eyes that were a little chilling. There was nothing particularly remarkable about him, but that didn't mean he wasn't dangerous, in fact the whole stance he had screamed killer. He had lost our trail when we ducked behind the cars, and for a moment he hesitated, looking back the way he'd come – that was when Dean and Sam jumped the railing near him and pinned him to the wall, Dean with a knife at his throat. I hurried over to them, standing against the railing looking down at them in the alley.
"Smile." Dean said, pressing the blade against the man's throat.
"What?" The man asked, looking confused.
"Show us those pearly whites." Dean instructed without any humour.
The man rolled his eyes. "Oh, for the love of – you want to stick that thing some place else? I'm not a vampire." I frowned at this statement, what did this guy know about vampires? "Yeah, that's right, I heard you guys in there," the man continued. Dean and Sam exchanged a look before turning back to him.
"What do you know about vampires?" Sam asked, still pinning the guy's shoulder to the wall.
The man gave the both an appraising look. "How to kill them," he stated, deadpan. He gave Dean a steely look. "Now seriously, bro. That knife's making me itch."
Dean cocked his head, but didn't move. The man started to pull away toward Sam, and Sam slammed his shoulder back against the wall, having none of it.
"Whoa. Easy there, chachi," the guy said to Sam, turning those eyes on him. He raised his hand up in an open gesture and moved it slowly to his mouth. He pulled back his lip, revealing normal gums to us.
"See? Fangless. Happy?" He asked and Dean stepped back, bringing down the knife.
"Now." He said, looking at the three of us. "Who the hell are you?"
We learned that his name was Gordon Walker, also a hunter, obviously. He was showing us his arsenal, tucked away in a hidden compartment of his red El Camino.
"Sam and Dean Winchester. I can't believe it. You know I met your old man once? Hell of a guy. Great hunter." He said and I exchanged a look with Sam who shrugged. Gordon's eyes showed a moment of emotion and he looked at Dean. "I heard he passed." Dean nodded. "I'm sorry. It's big shoes. But from what I hear, you guys fill 'em. Great trackers, good in a tight spot..."
"You seem to know a lot about our family." Dean interrupted, poker face on.
"Word travels fast. You know how hunters talk." Gordon said.
"No, we don't, actually." I said, crossing my arms and giving him an appraising look.
"I guess there's a lot your dad never told you, huh?" Gordon said, looking at Dean, whose jaw was set – he was giving nothing away.
"So, um, so those two vampires, they were yours, huh?" Sam asked, changing the subject.
"Yep. Been here two weeks." Gordon said.
"Did you check out that Barker farm?" Dean asked.
"It's a bust. Just a bunch of hippie freaks. Though they could kill you with that patchouli smell alone." He smirked.
"Where's the nest then?" I asked, leaning back against the car nearest me.
"I've got this one covered." Gordon said dismissively. "Look, don't get me wrong. It's a real pleasure meetin' you guys. But I've been on this thing over a year. I killed a fang back in Austin, tracked the nest all the way up here. I'll finish it."
"We could help," Dean offered, fidgeting a little.
"Thanks, but uh, I'm kind of a go-it-alone type of guy." Gordon said, looking at him.
"Come on man, I've been itching for a hunt." Dean coaxed, wanting to get in on the action.
"Sorry. But hey, I hear there's a Chupacabra two states over. Go ahead and knock yourselves out." He got into his car without any fanfare, peering back through the open window at us with a smile. "It was real good meeting you though. I'll buy you a drink on the flip side." He started up his car and drove away.
Dean moved back to the Impala, getting in and slamming the door. Sam and I joined him. "What now?" I asked. He turned to look at me with a grin.
"Now we follow him," he said. I sat back in my seat with a sigh and caught Sam shaking his head. Dean was going to hunt something if it killed him, best just get out of the way and let him go.
Timber Mill
We'd followed Gordon to a local timber mill. It looked old and run down – but it was in use, just closed for the night, all the workers were home with their non-working lives and no one seemed to be around. We all exited the car and headed toward the entrance Gordon had taken.
There was the sounds of a fight when we entered the mill, and we were instantly alert. An electric saw whirred and we rounded a corner, seeing Gordon pinned to a conveyor belt, saw running above him. A vampire was landing blow after blow at Gordon's head. We broke into a run. The vampire started to lower the saw intending to take off the other hunter's head.
Sam got to Gordon first and grabbed his feet, pulling him away from the blade.
The vampire reared up, fangs fully extended, and growled at us. Dean hit him a few times, causing him to fall back under the saw. I grabbed a scary looking hook spear off the wall and swung it around, bringing it down into the vampire's chest with a sickening blow, it went right into his chest and the vampire yelled in pain.
Dean punched the creature a few more times for good measure and then lowered the saw to his neck. Bringing it down slowly, I watched, breathlessly as the saw took off the vampire's head, flinching as a spray of blood caught both Dean and I in the face. Dean shut off the saw, looking down at the now dead vampire. I felt a sense of accomplishment, it was strangely good to be back in the hunt, but my stomach turned a little sick suddenly, looking at the decapitated head, I grimaced, this job had a way of bringing out the worst in you.
Gordon was watching us with a pleased smile, Sam was staring at us with a stunned expression, it occurred to me that he might not have seen Dean and I fighting side by side much since he'd gone away to school.
"So uh, I guess I gotta buy you that drink." Gordon said with a smile. Sam threw him a disturbed look before turning back to us. Dean stared silently at Sam, his expression a little empty, I frowned and wondered if this hunt really had been the best thing for us after all.
Local Bar
We were back at the bar, sitting around a little table, well into our second round of drinks. A waitress brought over a round of shots and put them on the table. Dean reached for his wallet and Gordon held out his hand.
"No, no, I got it." Gordon said with a smile.
"Come on." Dean said, shaking his head.
"I insist," Gordon said and handed a few bills to the waitress. "Thank you sweetie." I nursed my beer, sitting back in my chair watching as Gordon raised his freshly filled shot glass.
"Another one bites the dust," Gordon said with a smile. Dean joined him with his own drink.
"That's right." Dean nodded, downing the ouzo in the shot glass.
I got up, downing my own shot in one go, and went to grab the darts out of the board next to us, I felt antsy and wanted to keep moving. Besides, Gordon was making me a little uncomfortable, I just couldn't put my finger on why. Maybe I could get Sam up to join me, he looked like he was having about as much fun as you'd have at a funeral, a sour expression on his face.
"Dean," Gordon said with a laugh, shaking his head. "You gave that big-ass fang one hell of a haircut, my friend."
Dean smiled and nodded, taking the praise. "Thank you."
"That was beautiful. Absolutely beautiful." Gordon was in full on appreciation mode. I frowned and caught Sam's eye, he wasn't impressed.
"Yeah well... beautiful isn't exactly what I would call the state of my leather jacket right now," I said with a twinkle in my eye, looking at Dean with a grin. He grimaced.
"Yeah, sorry about that," he said a little sheepishly before sticking his tongue out at me. "You all right, Sammy?" He turned to look at his brother who was still sitting quietly at the table.
"I'm fine." Sam said, clearly lying.
"Well, lighten up a little, Sammy," Gordon said, getting a stern look from Sam.
"They're the only ones who get to call me that." Sam said coldly, nodding at Dean and me.
"Ok." Gordon said with a shrug. "No offence meant. Just celebrating a little. Job well done." Dean was looking frustrated with Sam, and I bit my lip, wondering if I should intercede or not.
"Right. Well, decapitations aren't my idea of a good time, I guess." Sam said, looking a little uncomfortable.
"Oh, come on, man, it's not like it was human. You've gotta have a little more fun with your job." Gordon said, clearly amused at Sam's mood.
"See? That's what I've been trying to tell him. You could learn a thing or two from this guy." Dean said with a smile, taking a drink of his beer. I paused, contemplating. I wasn't sure that Gordon was the one we should be learning from, something didn't check out with him in my gut, and I was usually a good judge of character.
Sam exchanged a frustrated look with me, I shrugged. "Yeah, I bet I could." Sam muttered. "Look, I'm not gonna bring you guys down. I'm just gonna go back to the motel."
"Are you sure Sam?" I asked, looking at him concerned. Dean threw his hand in the air, frowning at me. Sam nodded at me, then looked at Dean.
"Yeah." He said. Sam moved to walk past me when Dean cleared his throat.
"Sammy? Remind me to beat that buzzkill out of you later, all right?" He said, tossing Sam the keys to the car.
Sam hesitated, looking at the keys then me.
"You coming Beth?" He asked me, a look clearly saying that he thought I was mad to stick around for the male bonding session.
I looked at Dean who sighed and gave me a disbelieving look.
"Nah, the night's still young Sammy," I said with a smile I didn't really feel, Dean threw me an approving look and Sam sighed, heading for the door. I looped my arm through his. "C'mon, I'll walk you out." I said cheerfully, Dean nodded at me.
Sam turned to me when we got to the car. "You can't seriously be celebrating in there Beth."
I looked at him, dropping the pretence now that we were alone. "I'm not Sam." I said seriously. "But this sour attitude isn't going to do a damn thing to keeping Dean on side with us. You saw that look in his eye. So... I'm going back in there with my best 'oh I just helped slaughter that vamp aren't I the coolest' attitude, and I'm going to keep my eye on things."
Sam looked at me curiously, this was a side he hadn't seen much of before. "So you're not sold on this Gordon guy?"
"Hell no, there's something seriously off about him. Now maybe it's just a hunter thing, not like we've spent much time around many of them." I paused and looked back at the bar. "Either way, I'm not leaving Dean alone with him."
Sam nodded and opened the car door. "Well, I'll see you back at the motel later," he said thoughtfully and I headed back to the bar.
Dean and Gordon were in full story exchange when I got back.
"...So. I pick up this crossbow. And I hit that ugly sucker with a silver-tipped arrow right in his heart. Sammy's waiting in the car, and uh, me and my dad take the thing into the woods, burn it to a crisp." Dean was saying and I paused to listen, standing behind him. "I'm sitting there and looking into the fire, and I'm thinking to myself, I'm sixteen years old. Most kids my age are worried about pimples, prom dates. I'm seeing things that they'll never even know. Never even dream of. So right then, I just sort of..."
"Embraced the life?" Gordon asked.
"Yeah," Dean said quietly.
"Yeah." Gordon said, looking up at me with an odd look, was it a challenge?
Dean realised I was back and turned with a smile. "Hey, there she is," he said, reaching back to grab my hand, pulling me into his lap with a grin which earned a curious look from Gordon. "How's Sammy?" He asked, eyes softening just a little, I was relieved to see it.
"Yeah he's fine, sulking like usual – you know Sam." I said, reaching out to take a drink of Dean's beer. Dean nodded knowingly at me.
"I hope it wasn't something I said?" Gordon said.
"No, no, he just gets that way sometimes." I said with a smile, dismissing the issue.
"Yeah." Dean said, looking over at Gordon. "So how'd you get started?" He asked, wrapping his arms around my waist and holding me as I got comfortable on his lap.
Gordon's face turned serious. "First time I saw a vampire I was barely eighteen. Home alone with my sister. I hear the window break in her room. I grab my dad's gun, run in, try to get it off her. Too late. So I shoot the damn thing. Which of course is about as useful as snapping it with a rubber band. It rushes me, picks me up, flings me across the room, knocks me out cold. When I wake up, the vampire's gone, my sister's gone."
"And then?" Dean asked.
"Then... try explaining that one to your family." Gordon said, and we both nodded. We understood that one. "So I left home. And then bummed around looking for information: how you track 'em, how you kill 'em. And I found that fang - it was my first kill."
"Sorry about your sister," I said quietly.
"Yeah. She was beautiful. I can still see her, you know? The way she was. But hey, that was a long time ago. I mean, your dad. It's gotta be rough.." Gordon said, changing the subject.
Dean shifted in his seat a bit and I decided to get up go for another beer, pulling some cash out of my pocket and heading up to the bar.
"Yeah. Yeah, you know." I heard Dean's voice faintly as I walked away. "He was just one of those guys. Took some terrible beatings, just kept coming. So you're always thinking to yourself, he's indestructible. He'll always be around, nothing can kill my dad. Then just like that ..." Dean snapped his fingers, "...he's gone." He paused, going quiet for a moment.
"I can't talk about this to Sammy, he's been all over me like a bad rash with the grief counselling. Besides, you know, I'm the oldest, I gotta keep my game face on." He cleared his throat. "But uh, the truth is I'm not handling it very well." Dean confessed and I tried to hide the surprise on my face as I overheard this conversation. Dean would know I could hear it, I wasn't more than a few yards away, maybe it was easier than saying it to my face right now, but clearly he wanted to bring it up. I turned a little to listen more. "I feel like I have this..."
"Hole inside you?" Gordon said, looking over at Dean. "And it just gets bigger and bigger and darker and darker?" Dean nodded agreement to that. "Good." Gordon said, throwing an unreadable look at me. "You can use it. Keeps you hungry." He turned back to Dean. "Trust me. There's plenty out there needs killing, and this'll help you do it. Dean, it's not a crime to need your job."
I pondered this, something just not right about that, we had enough darkness in our lives, I wasn't sure that feeding it was a good thing, but then, I'd always preferred to err on the side of faith in something better than ourselves.
I stepped away toward the restrooms, pulling out my phone as I walked. When I was out of earshot I dialled Ellen, I wanted to get to the bottom of this Gordon Walker.
"Harvelle's Roadhouse," Ellen answered on the first couple of rings.
"Hey, Ellen, uh.. it's Beth O'Malley." I said.
"Beth! It's good to hear from you. You kids are ok, aren't you?" She asked in a friendly tone.
"Yeah. Yeah everything's fine. I just have a question." I answered.
"Yeah, shoot." Ellen said.
"Have you ever come across a guy named Gordon Walker?" I asked, looking back to make sure that Dean and Gordon were still safely out of earshot.
"Yeah, I know Gordon," Ellen answered.
"And?" I prompted.
"Well, he's a real good hunter. Why are you asking, sweetie?" Ellen questioned.
"Well, we ran into him on a job, and we're kind of working with him, I guess." I said.
"Don't do that Beth," Ellen said quickly and I frowned.
"I thought you said he was a good hunter?" I said, starting to feel a little worried, that knot in my stomach that I'd been feeling since we met Gordon was starting to do somersaults now.
"Yeah, and Hannibal Lecter's a good psychiatrist. Look, he is dangerous to everyone and everything around him." Ellen said. "If he's working a job, you kids just let him handle it and you move on."
"Ellen..." I muttered.
"No, Beth? You just listen to what I'm telling you, ok?" Ellen said sternly.
"Yeah, yeah ok. Thanks Ellen." I said, hanging up and looking back at Dean. How on earth was I going to approach him with this information about his newest hero?
Gordon was still harping on about hunting when I got back, I'd never heard someone talk so much about hunting, it was something we didn't really do as a family, we kind of avoided talking about it actually – it was just do the job, and when the job was done, let it go. I had a moment to realise that John had done it this way deliberately, to keep us sane, keep us wanting for something else other than a life like Gordon was talking about.
"Know why I love this life?" Gordon said, looking up as I sat down on the chair next to Dean.
"Hmm?" Dean asked, taking another sip of his beer.
"It's all black and white. There's no maybe. You find the bad thing, kill it." I gazed at him, curious. "See, most people spend their lives in shades of grey. Is this right? Is that wrong? Not us." Gordon finished looking pleased with himself.
"Not sure Sammy would agree with you there," I quipped, looking at him.
"Doesn't seem like your brother's much like us," Gordon said, and Dean looked a little cautious at that comment, Gordon was quick to explain himself, seeing the look.
"I'm not saying he's wrong. Just different. But you and me? We were born to do this. It's in our blood." Gordon said looking straight at Dean, who swallowed and stared at Gordon thoughtfully. Gordon took a swig of his beer and turned his eyes on me, I was mulling over that statement.
"You though, Beth, you I haven't quite figured out yet." He said giving me an appraising look.
"That right?" I asked with guarded eyes.
"Well yeah, I mean for a start – you're a girl, and I don't much hold to girl hunters." I raised an eyebrow. "But you proved tonight that you can hold your own, in fact there's a bit of a ruthless streak in you – but I'm betting you don't show it very often."
I swallowed, thinking about how I'd just rammed that spear into the vampire earlier, I hadn't even hesitated, and then there was the time I nearly put that little girl's head through a wall because she'd pissed me off when slicing Dean open with a knife.
"Well we all have our dark sides," I said cryptically, taking another drink.
"Hmmm. That we do, that we do. And from what I've heard on the grapevine, you've had your fair share of darkness, but I'd say you dabble a little closer to the shades of grey that Sam does. Take for instance what happened to your father." He shook his head, thinking about it. Dean shifted in his seat, casting a nervous gaze over at me.
"What about it?" I asked him staring at him with cold eyes.
"Well, I'm just saying, maybe it's all those shades of grey that make us vulnerable to something like possession. Make us weak." He looked at me, dark eyes, dangerous and broody, he was testing me. "See, if it's all black and white, where is the doubt, the vulnerability to let something like that in?"
I fought down the anger coming up inside. "Well..." I said, "It's a damn good thing our Dad didn't see things in quite such a monochrome light, or we wouldn't even be having this conversation. He would have just killed me the minute he laid eyes on me." Dean flinched at that comment, and I leaned toward Gordon.
"How many innocent girls have you killed because of your black and white philosophy?" I asked Gordon, who said nothing. "I can tell you this much, you keep carrying all this hate around in you, that's going to make you a hell of a lot more vulnerable to a demon slipping into your meat suit, than this girl will ever be." I said it calmly, no need to let him know just how riled up I actually felt.
Dean looked over at me with a curious gaze, taking in what I'd said. Gordon was looking at me, as if assessing me, but he remained silent.
"OK, well, this conversation has been... fun," Dean said nervously with a chuckle. "How about we get back to some celebrating?"
I smiled at him, instantly changing demeanour. Let Gordon puzzle that one out. "Mhmmm, sounds good to me – I think it's time we broke out the tequila," I said to Dean, who nodded. I reached over and slid his wallet out of his back pocket, standing with a grin. "Your shout."
Motel Room
Sam wasn't there when we got back to the motel room. Dean and Gordon were sitting at a table discussing their next strategy over a map. I'd kind of been hoping Gordon would take off so I could get the boys alone and discuss my call with Ellen, it wasn't looking good.
"This is the best pattern I can establish. It's sketchy at best." Gordon said, tracing a line on the map.
"Looks like it's all coming from this side of town. Which means the nest would be around here some place, right?" Dean nodded, assessing the map.
"Yep, that's what I'm thinking. Problem is, there's thirty-five, forty farms out there. I've searched about half of them already, but nothing yet. They're covering their tracks real good." Gordon said.
"Then I guess we'll just have to search the other half." Dean said, looking at his watch and then up at me. "What time is it? Where is Sam?"
I shrugged, but I had been wondering the same thing, it was getting late.
"Car's parked outside. Probably went for a walk. Seems the 'take a walk' type." Gordon said dismissively. I frowned.
Dean was rubbing his eyes, he looked tired and a little worried. "Yeah, he is, but..." Dean started, looking up as the door opened, relieved when Sam came through it.
"Sam, where have you been?" I asked, worried. Sam gave me a serious look, still standing in the doorway.
"Beth, can I talk to you alone?" He asked, and I raised an eyebrow. Dean frowned and stood up.
"How about we all take a little walk?" Dean asked looking between Sam and me. "You mind chillin' out for a couple minutes?" He asked Gordon who shook his head, looking slightly amused.
We exited the room and walking out to the motel's parking lot.
"Dean, maybe we've got to rethink this hunt," Sam said, looking anxious.
"What are you talking about? Where were you?" Dean asked, looking confused.
"In the nest," Sam said and my mouth nearly hit the ground.
"You found it?" I asked.
"They found me, Beth." Sam said, looking at me.
"Well how'd you get out? How many did you kill?" I asked, he didn't look any worse for wear.
Sam threw his hands up in the air and shrugged. "None," he said, pointedly.
"Well Sam, they didn't just let you go," Dean said, frowning.
"That's exactly what they did." Sam said, looking between the two of us. I swallowed and looked at Sam, he looked unhurt, a little freaked out maybe, but anyone would be in his place.
"All right, well, where is it?" Dean said, talking about the nest again.
"I was blindfolded, I don't know." Sam said.
"Well, you've got to know something." Dean pointed out.
"We went over that bridge outside of town, but Dean, listen. Maybe we shouldn't go after them." Sam said, he was looking all worked up and concerned.
"Why not?" I asked, curious.
"I don't think they're like other vampires. I don't think they're killing people." Sam said.
"You're joking?" Dean said, but Sam's look told him otherwise. He frowned.
"Then how do they stay alive? Or undead, or whatever the hell they are?" Dean asked.
"The cattle mutilations. They said they live off of animal blood." Sam explained and I stopped to give this some thought. Could they do that?
"And you believed them?" Dean asked, sceptical.
"Look at me, Dean. They let me go without a scratch." Sam pointed out, and there was no denying that.
"Wait, so you're saying..." Dean stopped and thought about it. "No, man, no way. I don't know why they let you go. I don't really care. We find 'em, we waste 'em." Dean said, and I frowned. Had he heard nothing of that earlier conversation?
"Why?" Sam asked, lost at the train of thought.
"What part of 'vampires' don't you understand Sam? If it's supernatural, we kill it, end of story. That's our job." Dean said stubbornly.
"No Dean, that is not our job. Our job is hunting evil! And if these things aren't killing people, they're not evil!" Sam countered, getting angry.
"Of course they're killing people, that's what they do. They're all the same, Sam. They're not human, ok? We have to exterminate every last one of them." Dean said, starting to sound a little scary.
"No, Dean, I don't think so, all right? Not this time." Sam was resolute.
"Gordon's been on those vamps for a year, man, he knows." Dean said, pointing back at the room.
"Gordon?" Sam looked amused.
"Yes." Dean said, stern look in his eyes.
Sam threw me a frustrated look. "You're taking his word for it?"
"That's right," Dean said with a nod.
"Ellen says he's bad news," I chimed in, looking at them both. They turned to stare at me.
"You called Ellen?" Dean asked me and I nodded. He looked a little taken aback and then shrugged.
"And I'm supposed to listen to her? We barely know her Beth, no thanks, I'll go with Gordon." Dean argued and I shook my head.
"Right, 'cause Gordon's such an old family friend," Sam smirked. "You don't think I can see what this is?" Sam asked.
"What are you talking about?" Dean asked.
"He's a substitute for Dad, isn't he?" Sam asked. "A poor one."
"Shut up Sam," Dean said, looking uncomfortable.
"He's not even close Dean. Not on his best day." Sam said, and I had to agree.
"You know what? I'm not even going to talk about this." Dean said throwing his arms up and smiling at Sam.
"You know, you slap on this big fake smile but I can see right through it. Because I know how you feel, Dean. Dad's dead. And he left a hole, and it hurts so bad you can't take it, but you can't just fill up that hole with whoever you want to." Sam said loudly. "It's an insult to his memory." I felt the tears coming up into my eyes again and blinked them back.
"Ok." Dean said smirking. He started to turn away and then at the last moment swung his arm around punching Sam hard in the jaw.
"Dean!" I gasped, stepping up beside Sam. Sam paused, turning back slowly to glare at his brother who was looking ready for a fight. Sam didn't take the bait.
"You can hit me all you want. It won't change a thing." Sam said quietly and I looked furiously between the pair of them.
"I'm going to that nest. You don't want to tell me where it is, fine. I'll find it myself." Dean said angrily, turning and walking back to the motel room.
"Dean!" I called out to him, glancing at Sam who glared at his retreating brother. We both followed him, set on talking some sense into him.
When we got back indoors, Gordon was gone.
"Gordon?" Dean asked, looking around.
"You think he went after them?" I asked.
"Probably." Dean said.
"Dean, we have to stop him," Sam said.
"Really, Sam? Because I say we lend a hand." Dean countered, stubborn as ever.
Sam reached a hand out in front of him. "Just give me the benefit of the doubt, would you? You owe me that." Sam said to him.
"Yeah, we'll see. I'll drive. Give me the keys." Dean said, surly. Sam pointed over to a table and then looked back when he couldn't see the keys.
"He snaked the keys!"
Dean grimaced and reached under the dash to hot-wire the car.
"I can't believe this. I just fixed her up too!" He muttered, the engine started and he sat back in his seat, looking at Sam. "So, the bridge, is that all you got?"
Sam was sitting in the passenger seat looking at a map. "The bridge was four and a half minutes from their farm."
"How do you know?" I asked, leaning forward.
Sam looked at me. "I counted," he said with a smile. He traced along the map with his finger the likely route to take. "They took a left out of the farm, then turned right onto a dirt road, followed that for two minutes slightly up a hill, then took another quick right and we hit the bridge."
"You're good," Dean said, impressed. "You're a monster pain in the ass, but you're good." Sam grinned.
We were at the farm inside of ten minutes, Gordon's car was already there. Sam was out and headed for the house before Dean had even shut down the engine. We hurried after him, Dean was sliding his gun into the back of his pants. I was a little curious as to why we'd left the machetes in the car if we were going to be helping out Gordon... maybe Sam had gotten through to him after all.
We found Gordon in the kitchen, a female vampire was tied to a chair at the head of the table, a jar of blood in front of her. She was covered in small cuts, looking pale and sickly, moaning in pain. I watched as Gordon dipped a knife in the blood, and circling around, sliced the knife across her chest, the girl gasped from the pain. I exchanged a look with Dean that basically said this wasn't the way we did business.
He looked up when we entered. "Guys, come on in."
"Hey, Gordon," Dean said, a wary tone to his voice. "What's going on?"
"Just poisoning Lenore here with some dead man's blood. She's going to tell us where all her little friends are, aren't you? Want to help?" Gordon answered, a fanatical, frightening look in his eyes.
"Look, man..." Dean started stepping further into the room, only to be interrupted by Gordon who was speaking erratically.
"Grab a knife. I was just about to start in on the fingers." Gordon finished his sentence by dragging his knife across Lenore's arm, Sam started to move in on Gordon and I threw Dean an urgent look, this so wasn't how we our jobs.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, hey, let's all just chill out, huh?" Dean said, holding out a hand.
"I'm completely chill." Gordon said. And completely nuts, I thought to myself.
"Gordon, put the knife down." Sam said, stepping forward only to have Dean put his arm out.
"Sounds like it's Sam here needs to chill." Gordon said, turning his gaze on the latter.
"Just step away from her, all right?" I said, stepping around Sam and moving half way down the table toward him.
Gordon looked at us, almost like he was hearing what we were saying. "You're right. I'm wasting my time here." He tossed the bloody dagger on the table and moved closer to me and his bag on the table. "This bitch will never talk. Might as well put her out of her misery," he said, pulling out an even bigger blade from his bag. "I just sharpened it, so it's completely humane." He said, looking up at me with a challenge.
"Gordon, I'm letting her go," Sam said and made to move toward Lenore. Gordon's eyes flared and took a few steps, pointing the knife at my chest, we all froze.
"You're not doing a damn thing," Gordon said to Sam, eyes warning him that he was serious.
"Hey, hey, hey, Gordon, let's talk about this." Dean said, throwing Sam a cautioning look.
"What's there to talk about? It's like I said, Dean. No shades of grey." Gordon said, looking at Dean.
"Yeah." Dean's voice was low and controlled, but I knew it would be far from what he was feeling. "I hear ya. And I know how you feel." Dean took a few steps, not breaking eye contact with Gordon.
"Do you?" Gordon asked with a steely look.
"The vampire that killed your sister deserved to die, but this one..." Dean was interrupted by Gordon's manic laughter.
"Killed my sister?" He said, still brandishing the knife at me. "That filthy fang didn't kill my sister. It turned her. It made her one of them. So I hunted her down, and I killed her myself."
"You did what?" Dean asked, shocked.
"It wasn't my sister any more, it wasn't human. I didn't blink. Just like your Daddy shouldn't have blinked with this one," he looked at me, eyes full of contempt. "And neither should you."
I swallowed, this man was completely mad, more so than Ellen had let on.
"So you knew all along then? You knew about the vampires, you knew they weren't killing anyone. You knew about the cattle. And you just didn't care." Sam said, changing the subject, looking a little anxious as he stepped closer to me.
"Care about what? A nest of vampires suddenly acting nice? Taking a little time out from sucking innocent people? And we're supposed to buy that? Trust me. Doesn't change what they are, and I can prove it." His eyes turned dark and he grabbed my arm, slicing the knife along it. I gasped and he pulled me to him, laying the knife against my throat while holding my arm at an odd angle. He dragged me over toward Lenore. Dean pulled his gun, eyes furious.
"Let her go." He said, pissed. "Now!"
"Relax." Gordon said, seemingly not worried about the gun. "If I wanted to kill her, she'd already be on the floor. Just making a little point." Gordon held my arm over Lenore's face and squeezed it, a couple of drops of blood fell. She hissed, fangs extending in a snarl.
"Hey!" Dean shouted, moving a few steps closer.
"You think she's so different? Still want to save her? Look at her. They're all the same. Evil, bloodthirsty." Gordon said, staring at Dean. Dean struggled with a decision, watching the whole scene unfold. I swallowed hard and looked down at Lenore. She was struggling to control herself, fighting, and then she won the battle, retracting her fangs and turning away her face.
"No, no!" She whimpered. Dean's eyes looked surprised and he frowned at this behaviour.
"You hear her, Gordon?" Sam asked, coming a few more steps.
"No, no!" Lenore was still whimpering, fighting her nature. Gordon looked shocked, staring at her, his grip on my arm lessened and I used the momentary lapse in concentration to twist his wrist, disarming him and bringing the knife up to his throat, pushing him against the wall.
"We're done here." I said, glaring at him in the eye.
"Sam, get her out of here." Dean said nodding at Lenore, still training the gun on Gordon.
"Yeah," Sam said, untying the ropes and picking Lenore up in his arms. Gordon went to move after them, but I pressed the knife into his neck, drawing a little blood.
"Uh-uh." I said, "I don't think so."
"Gordon," Dean said, still pointing the gun at the crazed hunter. "I think you and I have some things to talk about."
I looked over at Dean and he nodded at me. I stepped back, lowering the knife from Gordon's neck, moving out of reach of him quickly and coming around to where Dean was – he might be beaten, but he was still crazy.
"Get out of my way." Gordon growled, grabbing a knife from the table, and Dean shook his head.
"Sorry." He replied.
"You're not serious." Gordon said, shaking his head.
"I'm having a hard time believing it too, but I know what I just saw. If you want those vampires, you've gotta go through me." Dean said. I looked at Dean like he was mad, what was he looking for a fight?
Gordon nodded, looking at me and considering his options. He looked down at the knife he was wielding, then back at Dean before jamming it into the table where it stood at attention.
"Fine," he said, challenging Dean.
"Dean..." I cautioned, looking at him. He glanced at me.
"Stay out of this, you hear?" His eyes warned me that he wanted to handle this on his own. I sighed and nodded, moving back toward the wall. Dean pulled the clip out of his gun, pocketing it, and went to put the gun in his other pocket. Gordon wasted no time taking advantage of Dean's distraction, throwing a punch and hitting him in the jaw. Dean hit him back, and Gordon stumbled back, grabbing the knife out of the table. Dean groaned, unhappy at the unfair play and slipped into a defensive stance.
Gordon swung at Dean a couple of times and Dean dodged, jumping back with each swing. He caught hold of Gordon's knife arm and swung him around, smashing the arm several times against the wall until Gordon dropped the knife.
"What are you doing, man? You doing this for a fang? Come on, Dean, we're on the same side here." Gordon muttered at him as they struggled to get a hold on each other.
They spun, wrestling with each other, holds on each other's shirts. "I don't think so, you sadistic bastard!" Dean said. Gordon broke the hold, punching Dean a couple of times in the face before kicking him from the kitchen into the living room, smashing into a coffee table. Dean rolled on to his side with a groan, I gasped, debating whether to intervene or not but Dean glared at me, warning me to stay out of it. I tested the weight of the knife in my hand just the same, just in case.
"You're not like your brother. You're a killer, like me." Gordon said, advancing on Dean. As he got within reach, Dean kicked out, sweeping Gordon's legs out from under him, jumping up and punching him in the face a few more times before hauling Gordon to his feet and throwing him against the wall. Gordon looked groggy, Dean had gotten the upper hand.
Dean looked at him in disgust, then elbowed him in the face. "That's for cutting my girl, you sorry son of a bitch!" He put Gordon into a headlock and pulled him into the kitchen, ramming his head against the wall as he passed through the arch separating the two rooms. Gordon groaned at the impact. "Oooh sorry," Dean said without much conviction.
He set Gordon down in a chair and I grabbed the rope that had been used to restrain Lenore, bringing it over. Dean took it with a grimace and started to wind it around Gordon, tying him up.
"You know, I might be like you, and I might not." Dean said with a grunt. "But you're the one tied up right now," he said, stepping back to admire his handiwork. I sighed with relief, glad to see that little display of testosterone was out of the way.
Dawn had arrived, light streaming through the shutters in the bay window of the kitchen nook. I was sitting on the kitchen counter, legs dangling down, playing with the knife I'd taken from Gordon. Dean was pacing around Gordon, staring him down.
Sam entered, looking at us. "Did I miss anything?" He asked, taking in the fresh bruising on Dean's face.
"Nah, not much." Dean said with a shrug and I raised my eyebrow.
"Did Lenore get out ok?" I asked Sam, looking up.
"Yeah. All of them did." Sam said, accentuating that last part for Gordon's sake.
"Then I guess our work here is done. How you doin', Gordy? Gotta tinkle yet?" Dean asked, looking over at the sullen, yet fully conscious man tied to the chair. He threw us all death glares in response.
"All right. Well, get comfy. We'll call someone in two or three days, have them come out, untie you." Dean said, walking behind Gordon and jamming one of his knives into the table behind him. I jumped off the counter, glaring at Gordon. I was still a little bitchy about the fresh cut on my arm, it stung like a son of a bitch.
"You know Dean," Gordon said suddenly, causing us to pause. "We'd make a good team, you'd have to ditch these pair though. They're weak. They'll only hold you back from your true potential." Dean raised his eyebrow in amusement.
"Yeah, I think I'll pass, if it's all the same to you," Dean replied.
"Ready to go?" Sam asked us both, moving toward the door.
"Not yet," I said, standing over Gordon. I smiled and cocked my head to the side. "I guess this is goodbye. Well, it's been real." I pulled my arm back and smashed him in the face, the impact driving him backwards, falling to the floor. I grimaced at the pain in my knuckles, but it was a good pain.
I turned back to Dean and Sam who were looking at me a little stunned. "OK, I'm good now. We can go." I said with a smile, walking past them and leading the way out.
Outside I leaned against the Impala and turned to watch the boys exit the house. Dean was wincing a little from the beating he'd taken. When they got to the bottom step, Dean turned to Sam, setting himself on his feet like a boxer about to go three rounds in the ring.
"Sam? Clock me one." He said, Sam stared at him in disbelief.
"What?" Sam said.
"Come on. I won't even hit you back. Let's go." Dean said, waving for Sam to hit him. I shook my head, amused. Clearly Dean was feeling a little bit guilty about that punch he'd socked Sam with last night. Worse that Sam had been right.
"No," Sam said with a twitch of his mouth.
"Let's go, you can get a freebie. Hit me, come on!" Dean urged.
"Dean, you look like you just went twelve rounds with a block of cement. I'll take a raincheck." Sam said, shaking his head and walking away.
"I wish we never took this job, it's just jacked everything up," Dean said, coming to stand in front of me.
"What do you mean?" I asked, looking up at him.
"Think about all the hunts we went on, Beth, our whole lives." Dean said, looking uncomfortable.
"Okay," I said, tilting my head at him.
"What if we killed things that didn't deserve killing? You know? I mean, the way Dad raised us..." Dean looked conflicted.
"Dean, after what happened to Mom, Dad did the best he could," Sam said, looking at us from the other side of the car.
"I know he did. But the man wasn't perfect. And the way he raised us, to hate those things; and man, I hate them. I do." Dean looked over at Sam. "When I killed that vampire at the mill I didn't even think about it; hell I even enjoyed it." He looked back at me, struggling with that confession.
"You didn't kill Lenore," Sam pointed out.
"No, but every instinct told me to. I was gonna kill her. I was gonna kill 'em all." Dean said, looking up at the sky.
"Yeah, Dean, but you didn't," I said, resting a hand on his arm. "And that's what matters."
He looked at me, a smile almost reaching his mouth. "Yeah well, only because the pair of you are major pains in my ass!" He quipped and I chuckled, looking up at him with a smile.
"Well, guess we better stick around and continue being pains in the ass then," I said, looking back at Sam who was nodding with a smile.
"Thanks," Dean said, looking from Sam to me.
"Don't mention it," Sam said, getting in the car. Dean stared off into the distance for a moment before looking back at me, he was still conflicted, this new perspective not sitting easy with him, but he looked a little relieved.
"Good thing I have you," he said quietly to me, looking a little frightened at his own dark side.
"Good thing we have each other," I replied, kissing his cheek.
He got in the car and I slid into the seat behind him, staring out the window. Dean wasn't the only one struggling with inner demons. Gordon had just reminded me that there was a part of me that still held a lot of rage over what the supernatural, demons especially, had done to our lives. I'd lost two fathers to them, and I still felt like there should have been something more I could have done, something to change the outcome, to stop their deaths. Both times I'd failed, and there were days where it just consumed me inside. But days like this, when we got to do a little good, put something right in the world, it made it all a little better.
I fingered the rosary at my neck, thinking about all the prayers I'd offered over the years. Never once had I prayed for a creature, never even considered there might be good in them. Yet today, I found myself praying that Lenore and her nest found a little peace from being hunted, for once in their lives.
AUTHOR'S NOTES
The song for this chapter is Save our Souls by Blutengel
Anyone interested in seeing a flashback to pre-relationship Dean & Beth? I'm thinking ages 18 and 21? (Around the time Beth starts hunting regularly with Dean and John) I might have an episode which would work for a flashback if people are interested.
So I've actually had a couple of requests to see a little more sexy Dean time (ie. smut) I'm happy to throw this in more if that's what people like (only if it works with the story – or maybe I'll do some side stories and put them in a separate 'story'? I'm flexible), I just don't want to turn people off reading the series. Let me know what your thoughts are, you're the readers – more, less, the same? You can PM me if you don't want to put your answer in a review. Personally, I love the smut, but it's not everyone's thing and I respect that. BTW there is a smut episode coming up LOL I just have to write it.
BTW if people could clarify what they mean when they say smut, that would help out too – are you talking full on sex, or the little sexy moments like Dean & Beth in the library? :D
Anyone interested in talking possible storylines with me? Always like to chat about this and where to take it all – great bouncing ideas around with people who are enjoying the story as much as I like writing it.
Oh, and totally random – I was thinking today about a creative story I wrote for English back when I was in high school. We were studying Dead Poet's Society and had to write a piece based on that. I wrote a prologue to the movie. I realised today that it was my first fanfic! Hahaha I wish I had a copy of it somewhere, I remember at the time thinking it was one of the best things I'd ever written, and I know I got an A++ for it :D
THANK YOU to everyone who has taken the time to leave a review and/or pm – glad you're enjoying the storyline so far as we head into Season 2.