Chapter 10~ Moved but Untouched

And I'd give up forever to touch you

Cause I know that you feel me somehow

You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be

And I don't want to go home right now

And all I can taste is this moment

And all I can breathe is your life

Cause sooner or later it's over

I just don't want to miss you tonight

And I don't want the world to see me

Cause I don't think that they'd understand

When everything's made to be broken

I just want you to know who I am

Goo Goo Dolls~ Iris

~Bella~

You are a freak.

Four little perfectly scrawled words written in hot pink ink on a yellow post it note under the guise of a slice of cheese. It could have said, Will you marry me? and it would've had equal significance. I knew he was teasing me, because yes, having a pickle pen and a coordinating hamburger pad with matching eraser fries was a bit odd for a sixteen year old girl to possess. But, as I traced the indentations the pen made on the little square of paper, I knew that each day that passed, I fell deeper and deeper for this odd boy with his neatness and his foul mouth and his perfectly messy yet strategically styled hair and his fantastic sideburns. It was truly amazing how something as commonplace as sideburns could become so unbelievably fascinating when adorned by my beautiful boy.

I graciously offered him the use of my pickle pen.

He politely declined.

It was probably the world's most lame attempt at assessing a person's sexuality, but for some reason, I thought if he were gay, then he would enjoy using something phallic to write with such as my ridiculous pickle pen.

Okay, so I am an idiot and the worse homosexuality detective in the history of the universe.

Note to self...have Gaydar checked next time I have my oil changed.

In Edward's car, I'd asked him if he was sure he wanted me to accompany them to Port Angeles, because I saw how he instantly became irritated at the thought of my presence. It bothered me very much, and I couldn't figure out why he was so weird with me…as if he were bipolar or something.

His car was frighteningly clean, granted it was only a few months old. New car smell was brought to a whole other level in this baby, and there was a mix of leather and Edward that was startlingly arousing. There wasn't a speck of dirt on the mats or dust on the dash, and the whole inside was black leather and shiny tortoise shell-not the easiest surfaces to conceal dust on. Not that I expected anything less, really. The car was incredibly sexy too…nothing unmasculine about it.

Once we arrived in Port Angeles we shed our coats in the car, as it was cumbersome to wear while shopping and headed out to our respective destinations. I had waved goodbye, bidding Edward fun at his piano lesson and walked off with Jasper into the mall. I truly did enjoy Jasper's company, even if he was a bit handsy and overtly flirtatious. And that only irked me because if Alice were to observe his behavior toward me, she would be crushed. She was my best friend and I wouldn't do that to her. So I told him basically to back the hell off after he threw his arm around me, and whispered something naughty in my ear. I kept thinking to myself that his voice was not the one I longed to hear whispering those things to me.

We were in the bookstore when it happened, meandering along the aisles. I was looking for something new and light to read, perhaps something along the lines of a romance with a little soft core porn, perhaps. Jasper disappeared into the magazine aisle, thrumming through the music magazines. I joined him, picking up a Seventeen Magazine with a picture of a very pretty and unusually natural looking Britney Spears dressed in only an oversized white button-down shirt. When I replaced it back onto the shelf, Jasper snickered and muttered something under his breath. When I asked him to repeat what he said he replied, "I said, 'I should pick that up for Edward to whack off to.'"

"Ewwww, he likes Britney Spears?"

And he called me a freak. That girl was one pickle short of a full jar, plus did he not tell me he wasn't into blondes?

Jasper laughed and said, "Hell no, he has a thing for men's white shirts…fucker thinks they are sexy or some shit."

On girls…or boys?

Work with me here Jasper…is he a flaming butt pirate or what?

I nodded, more confused than ever. While I stood contemplating whether or not to just come out and ask Jasper at that point if Edward was gay, Jasper leaned over and whispered into my ear.

"You know what I think is sexy?" His eyebrows rose suggestively, while a devilish grin spread across his mouth. "Red bras." He winked, his eyes glancing to the strap of the red lace bra peeking out from my shirt. His fingers looped underneath the strap, snapping back against my skin with a brief sting.

I smacked him on the head hard. "Jasper, stop that shit."

He held his hands up in defense, muttering, "Sorry. Didn't mean to offend."

"Just watch your hands, buddy. You can't just go around snapping bras straps and being so grabby. Not every girl is enamored by your charms, and one of these days, you're going to get slapped across the face." I looked away, feeling his eyes on me. When I turned back to him, his jaw was slack and he looked incredibly dejected.

"Come on, didn't you say you wanted to get a shirt for the dance?" I tugged on his arm, playfully forgiving him. I knew shouldn't have felt guilty for scolding him, but I did.

I paid for my literary smut, earning a snicker from Jasper. "Teenage vampire porn? Nice."

Later, in the department store, I helped Jasper choose a dress shirt and tie. He told me he had asked Makenna to the dance earlier, but I already knew, because Alice had been distraught about the news after overhearing it from Jessica. Alec had asked her the week prior, and she decided to go with him just for someone to go with. I told her to come by after work and I'd give her something to wear. I had plenty of cute dresses that I would likely never touch. Rose was going with some guy Jared, who apparently she had a thing with over the summer, but she said she only was going with him to piss off Emmett. She had a carefully laid out plan to make Em jealous, and I sincerely hope it didn't backfire on her. With all the discussion of the dance and festivities surrounding homecoming, it still made me disheartened about not going with Edward. Not that he would have even asked me anyway.

A girl can dream though, right?

Well, I definitely do enough fantasizing.

After Jasper paid for the shirt and tie, we sat on the bench by the fountain and shared a messy cinnamon sugar pretzel that Jasper declared was Edward's kryptonite. He said foods like cinnamon sugar pretzels Edward avoided like the plague.

"Can I ask you something?" I asked with my mouth full. "Why did you guys move to Forks?"

Jasper took a sip of lemonade. "Some bullshit drama with Edward happened and my dad decided that it was time for some new scenery. My mom just really wanted us out of the city and into a small town where we could be less tempted to get into trouble." He looked at me with his eyebrow quirked, patting his pocket full of marijuana. "Little did she know?"

I chuckled, hoping he would eventually elaborate on the part about Edward and the stuff happening.

"So why here, why Washington of all places?"

"Well, actually it was sort of a fluke. On the same day my mom happened to read some article about rain and trees and like, picturesque greenery and shit having a calming effect on people, she saw the house up for sale on one of her designer's websites. She thought it would be good for Edward, and I guess for her, too, now that I think about it. They flew out to see the house that weekend, and when they came home they said they bought it. We left Chicago a month later."

"Calming effect? Why would Edward and your mom need calming?" I asked impatiently, practically jumping out of my skin to find out.

"Well, Edward has sort of…shit, I shouldn't be telling you this…he'd fucking kill me." He looked apprehensive, but I suppose not enough to betray his loyalty to his brother when I looked down brushing the sugar off my pants, pretending to have little interest. "Edward has…like, anxiety or whatever. And Chicago was just a rough place for him."

I looked at him in disbelief. "He has anxiety?"

"Uh…well he used to, not so much anymore." He eyed me warily, realizing maybe he had revealed too much.

"I guess the rain and the trees do work then. And, uh… your mom…she has anxiety too?" I pressed, wanting to get as much out of him before he closed up on me.

"Mom and dad have been trying to have a baby for years. They thought moving would be good for that. Maybe they thought rain and trees are good for baby making." He shrugged his shoulders with a weird, uncomfortable chuckle like it was too awkward to think of his parents like that. "But I guess they were wrong on that theory, cause she still hasn't become pregnant." His expression was forlorn, as if he truly felt compassion for his mother.

"That's so sad," I replied genuinely, not really knowing what else to say. "Were they hoping for a girl?" I smiled, trying to lighten up Jasper's mood.

"Yeah right, that poor kid with us as older brothers? She'd never get a boyfriend." We laughed, tearing more pretzel apart. "I feel so bad for them, you know? Mom's had like, a bunch of Invitro and stuff, shots and drugs…and she eventually does get pregnant, but keeps losing the babies. There's a really great fertility specialist located in Seattle, which is another reason why they picked Forks." He looked down at his shoes, definitely appearing empathetic. I had never seen him so thoughtful before, usually he was sort of an insensitive asshole, always making fun of Edward and saying mean things about Alice. "Plus, Dad has close friends in Seattle, so they figured it was ideal. He started his practice in Port Angeles, and honestly, I think he's the only one that is really happy here."

"You aren't happy here?" I asked.

He shrugged. "I don't love it, but I don't hate it either. I wasn't exactly happy in Chicago at the end either, so I guess it wouldn't have made a goddamn difference where the hell we went as long as it wasn't there."

I looked at him, sensing the sadness in his voice. "What happened?" I asked softly, hedging anxiously for as much information as I could get. I felt like a CIA agent interrogating my suspect with truth serum. Jasper would evidently be one shitty spy, that's for sure.

Jasper sighed, pressing his lips together. It was a long moment before he spoke, I was just about to apologize and tell him to forget it, when he said softly, "Her name is Emily. And she's fucking awesome. I loved her from the minute that I saw her. We went out for like eight months and …then all this shit happened and her stupid fucking parents wouldn't let her see me anymore. So after we broke up I came here willingly, cause it was too hard to look at her every day and not be with her."

"Wow, I had no idea," I said, wondering if Alice ever even had a shot compared to this girl he spoke so fondly of. "Do you think that's why you are the way you are?" He cocked his eyebrow questioningly. "I mean why you're such a flirt? Maybe because you still aren't over her and it's easier to just be flirtatious so you don't get hurt again?" I grimaced and shrugged a silent apology upon realizing his dumbfounded expression.

He looked at me incredulously while drawing his whole head back. "What am I on, Oprah?"

I laughed shrugging my shoulders again. "Sorry, just a guess. Never mind. But Emmett and Edward, are they unhappy too?"

"Well, Em doesn't really give a shit, as long as he's playing football. He's in a rush to go off to college and be on his own, anyway. And Edward, well, he's just…" Jasper huffed, his shoulders slumping forward, clearly frustrated by his younger brother. "Whatever…he's just fucking miserable no matter what..."

I whispered, "Why, Jasper?" Please tell me why Edward is the way he is. I have to know.

Jasper shook his head, as his lids closed. "It's a long fucking story."

Oh, don't bail on me now.

Jasper remained silent, staring into the mall, clearly done talking. I dropped my head in defeat, but understanding entirely. "Does it have anything to with Edward not liking to be touched?"

Jasper's expression froze. He pursed his lips and said, "Ah, you noticed that, huh? He's uh… weird. Just fucking strange, you know, with his OCD and shit." Jasper fumbled with that lame explanation, quickly changing the subject. I knew there had to be more to it, because Jasper wasn't exactly convincing in his explanation. "So, um…why did you move back to Forks?" he asked, effectively changing the subject and putting me into the hot seat.

I shifted my dangling feet, tucking one underneath me. "I already told you. Stuff happened and I left. It's not much of a story," I lied, pissed off at Jasper's abrupt end to our conversation. Mental note… Google Edward Cullen.

"Then tell me if it's not a big deal."

I huffed, slightly annoyed at having to rehash unpleasant details, while realizing I should probably reciprocate my share of the insightful information that Jasper offered. "My best friend's boyfriend made a move on me and though I didn't accept his advances, she didn't take it well. At all. She and my other 'friends' made my life really difficult, so I left when I couldn't take it anymore." I made air quotes around the word friends, because they most certainly were not my friends.

Okay, so that was only half the story, but it seemed to be enough for now.

I shrugged to appear indifferent, but the thought of it bothered the hell out of me. I couldn't even bring myself to say her name.

Jasper clicked his tongue. "Wow, girls really suck, huh?"

"Some of them, yeah," I laughed meekly. "But I'm happier here than I have been in a long time. It's nice to have friends that I know truly care about me, and would never hurt me over a stupid boy." I widened my eyes playfully. He smirked, taking the last bite of pretzel as I tilted it toward him.

As we stood, Jasper said, "Hey Bella listen…the shit I said about Edward and my mom. That's stays between you and me, okay?" I nodded, promising him not to betray his confidence. We tossed out our garbage, heading over to the newsstand to buy rolling papers.

While he was paying for them, I spotted a rack of novelty lighters and one in particular stood out. It was a little clear rectangular box filled with lighter fluid. When you pressed a button on the bottom, a burst of air shot out, pushing little colored balls into the fluid. The object was to try and get the balls nestled in the coordinating colored little half circles inside the chamber. I knew how Edward liked to play with his lighter, as well as how much he liked coordinating stuff, so I thought he would love an actual challenge.

It was almost four when Japer asked where I wanted to go next. "I need to go to the Gap for perfume," I mumbled, checking my phone.

"No, let's wait for Edward. I don't feel like hearing him bitch because we went there without him."

"Really, why's that?"

"Cause that store gives him a raging fucking hard on with all the color coordinated stacked shirts and neat piles and shit." I laughed, thinking he probably wasn't even kidding. I must admit I loved the visual.

My phone rang. Edward told us he'd be over in a minute. I laughed at the little thrill I got as I saved his number. It was the first time I had heard his voice over the phone. It sounded different, deeper, maybe even a little distressed.

I could see him enter the mall from a distance, his tall and lean physique perfect and stunning as his confident gait drew him progressively closer to me. My stomach fluttered and heat crept into my lower belly at the mere sight of his face.

When he arrived, he looked somewhat disheveled, his eyes red and tired looking, his skin paler than usual. I felt badly that maybe his piano teacher must have worked him unbelievably hard and then I thought that it was so odd because really, how physically grueling could a simple piano lesson be? Maybe it was an emotional session? Either way, it was just strange for him to look out of sorts. Then again, it wasn't exactly like Edward Cullen was the picture of ordinary for anything.

I wanted desperately to run to him, wrap my arms around his neck and just hold him to me comforting him with my affections, but I was too afraid of the rejection following. I just couldn't help feeling like I needed to take all of his woes away.

In the Gap I decided that giving him subtle hints that I liked him would be the best way to get the message across effectively. Maybe it was even a last ditch effort to find out if he was gay. Actually, last ditch would have been if I had stripped down to my undies and invited him into the dressing room, which in all honestly I would have preferred.

But again, I noticed how he carefully handed me the gloves without touching me, and how he flinched back when I put the hat on his head. I told him I wouldn't touch him in a whisper, and his eyes went wide. He was definitely guarded after that, but he let me turn the hat backwards, which god almighty he looked so perfect and amazing at that moment. If I ever married him, I wanted him in a backward baseball hat and a tux. Okay, maybe not…maybe just completely naked.

Of course adding to the enigma, I learned that Edward had a tattoo. I noticed the horizontal band of black ink on his right arm coiled around the well-developed cuts of his bicep. I couldn't make out exactly what it was, but the design appeared to be tribal and definitely intricate. The instinct to reach out and graze my fingertips over it was compelling, and I asked about it without even thinking that he would probably recoil, his guardedness taking the forefront. Edward pushed his sleeve down so fast it was a blur, hiding the markings from my sight. His reaction was perplexing to say the least and just fueled the fire for me to unravel all his mystery. Edward had given me no indication as to his sexual orientation or whether he reciprocated my feelings. It was immensely frustrating, to say the least.

At dinner, we sat at a small table set into the floor with our shoes off and ordered a variety of sushi rolls which we split when they arrived at the table. Edward rolled his eyes as I proudly displayed my purple polka dot socks, wiggling my toes at him.

Watching Edward eat sushi was entertaining and absolutely fascinating. I watched in awe as he lined up eight rolls on his rectangular dish, perfectly spacing each one apart from the other. He had two of each kind, arranged across from each other, as he moved them around with his chopsticks, eventually putting his tiny bowl of wasabi soy sauce directly at the bottom of the plate. I had been forewarned in the car as to Edward's sushi ritual and Jasper smirked when he realized I was watching Edward intently.

Edward didn't even glance up when he said, "Stop fucking staring at me B, or I'll poke your eyes out with my chopsticks." He popped a roll in his mouth and smirked.

I laughed so hard, Sprite came out of my nose, choking me to tears. You could tell they were raised with a laid-back mom…neither one attempted to help with my choking, both just yelling, "Hands up!" as they raised their arms in a mock demonstration.

Edward was so beautiful and so wonderfully weird.

As we ate, we chatted nonchalantly about nothing of real importance, laughing and smiling between bites and it was just really nice to be with my friends. At one point, despite the fact that I was quite proficient with the use of chopsticks, I lost the grip on my avocado roll and it splashed into the sauce. Wasabi, soy and ginger splattered all over Edward's wrist, coating his shiny silver bracelet. Jasper burst into laughter while I sat stunned, frozen in fear of Edward's reaction to getting him messy. His face turned slowly toward mine as I cowered in mock fear wearing a cringe.

I quickly dipped my napkin in my water glass in an attempt to wipe his arm clean as he watched with wide eyes before he pulled away. "I'm so sorry, E," I said in almost a whisper. He said nothing, and for a minute I really thought he was pissed. Expression blank, he snatched my wet napkin from my fingers, and removed his bracelet wiping it down before wiping his wrist off. He stuck his fingers in his water glass and suddenly, I felt a spray of water across my face as he flicked his wet fingers toward me. I shrieked, giggling as he continued to splash me, a playful smirk on his face.

A few restaurant patrons gave us dirty looks, but I didn't care as I knew Edward wasn't upset with me at all. I glanced up at him, as I fingered his bracelet. "May I?" I asked. Edward nodded, and I picked up the heavy silver chain in my hand, laying it across my palm. The initials EAC were engraved in intricate writing across the shiny, smooth surface of the plate. A small engraving of a lion propped on its hind legs decorated one end, and on the other were three shamrocks. I looked at him questioningly.

"Anthony," Edward responded softly, answering my silent question as to what the initial A stood for. I repeated his full name quietly almost in awe.

"The lion and the clover are part of the Cullen family crest," Jasper added.

"This is beautiful. So masculine," I said, as I dropped carefully it into his open palm.

"Thank you. My father gave it to me when my adoption was final," he said almost reverently, as he clasped it back onto his clean wrist.

I remarked, "Oh, that's so nice. What a thoughtful thing to do. Your parents are great."

"Yeah, they are…thanks. They liked you, too. Said you were endearing or some shit." Edward laughed, popping another roll into his mouth. I rolled my eyes.

"Endearing? I endured the meatballs of death for endearing? Hell, I'm fantastic and beautiful and charming and witty, not to mention intelligent and…"

Edward interrupted, "Arrogant, conceited, vain, self-important, smug…need I go on?" He snickered and I smacked the air near his head, causing him to lean over to the side away from me. The sudden movement made him to drop his roll right into his soy sauce, splattering the front of his shirt with brown specks. He groaned, tossing his napkin down in defeat as Jasper and I laughed uncontrollably.

"See what you get when you condescend?" I asked snidely, pointing to the mess.

"Yeah, you owe me a shirt," he responded flatly.

"Okay," I said, lifting up the hemline of my top minutely, as if I were going to give it to him right off my back. "But I don't think this is gonna fit." They both looked at me in disbelief apparently having no idea if I was kidding or not. Jasper raised his eyebrows suggestively, and Edward stared at me blankly.

I smoothed the hem of my shirt down replying snarkliy, "Oh, you both wish."

Well, I knew at least Jasper did.

When we finished eating, the boys insisted on taking care of the bill and we headed home. I realized that it was the first time in a week that I had spent time with them outside of school, not under the influence of drugs or alcohol, and it was really nice to have just hung out with them.

That evening, when I got home, I spent some time with Charlie watching television before I headed up to my room. At the computer, I sat in front of the search page of Google staring blankly at it for what seemed like a good hour. I felt terribly wrong for doing it, and the second I typed in Edward Cullen, my heart raced out of my chest and I began to sweat profusely. I couldn't quite decipher if the nerves were because I felt so guilty for delving into his past, or if it was because I was afraid of what I might find out. I mean, did I really want to know about his past girlfriends?

However, my fears were squashed when the only things that came up were some medical related pages on Dr. Cullen, Esme's old home design website, and a few articles about Emmett from his old school in Chicago. Not a thing about Edward.

I was infinitely disappointed, but completely relieved at the same time. I needed to know about him, but I thought that the fair thing would be for me to wait until he offered up the information, instead of me searching the internet for details of Edward's past. I mean, what if he went snooping about me? Surely he would be horrified at what he would find without a clear explanation to back it.

I realized that the closer I got to this boy, the more I got to know him, the more I desperately wanted him. With that came the notion that if he didn't want me, I would be terribly, incredibly, impossibly heart broken.

That night, I said my prayers as usual.

Dear God,

Please watch over the less fortunate and give all the people in the south a new style of hat, because cowboy hats are stupid looking. While you're at it, give them some new music options too, because some of their songs are just plain silly. Please bless Mom, Dad, Phil, Maggie, Carlisle, Esme, Angela, Ben, Alice, Jasper, Emmett, Rosalie, and of course, Edward. Please forgive me for Googling Edward, because while I know it was wrong, it would have been nice to have found out a little something about him. I don't know if you can do this or if this is part of your otherworldly powers, but if you can send Edward a kiss goodnight from me, I would really appreciate it. Oh, and see what you can do about giving Esme and Carlisle a baby, because they really, really deserve one.

Amen.

On Friday night, it was pouring so badly that we knew no one would be hanging out at the beach. My mother's packaged arrived full of clothes for Alice that afternoon, and I swear, she was more excited that one could ever imagine, jumping and squealing in delight. But when she hugged me, I knew it meant more to her than just having new clothes. She was happy to have me back in her life again which I couldn't even bring myself to tell her how much that sentiment was reciprocated.

She tried on a bunch of cute dresses from my closet and decided on a strapless black bubble dress that was really flattering and made her boobs look enormous. As happy as she was to be going to the dance, she didn't have to say aloud how upset she was about not going with Jasper…it was just a given.

Rosalie came over later with pizza and a movie, which we watched with my dad and Maggie. Afterward, we all played Cranium and laughed our asses off for hours after at my father imitating a ballerina on his turn at charades. The three of us were all admittedly disappointed that we weren't able to see our boys in the light of a fire at the beach, but frequent glances out the living room window at three unmoving cars told us that the Cullen brothers had stayed home as well.

Saturday afternoon turned out to be a gorgeous day, the sun shining with just a hint of a chill in the air. The game started just after noon, and the girls and I headed over to the packed stadium dressed in school colors with heavy blankets draped over our arms. We looked for a row of empty seats, and I spotted Edward immediately after scanning the bleachers, my heart beating like humming bird wings.

Edward was wearing the green sweatshirt he bought looking deliciously rebellious and totally anti school spirit as the colors were blue and gold. On his head, was the baseball hat we bought…and it was backward. I felt my knees go weak, and I turned away from him as to not pass out or call any unnecessary attention to myself. He was up pretty high, seated next to his mom and dad on one side and Jasper on the other. Makenna, Lauren and Jessica were sitting next to Jasper, waving pom poms and flags.

There was empty space on the row of seats in front of them, but I didn't want to be presumptuous and just assume they weren't saved. My phone rang in my purse, and when I pulled it out it was Edward. I almost peed myself when I spotted the caller ID.

He said he had saved us seats, but didn't know if Alice would be comfortable sitting there with Jasper and Makenna. I thought it was sweet for him to have considered that, and Alice said she didn't care, that she was resigned to living a life without Jasper, so what the hell. I could tell she obviously wasn't happy about it, but there really was nowhere else to sit.

My heart raced impossibly quick as each step up I grew closer and closer to him. Our gazes met briefly, and I was so mesmerized by his smile that I tripped on the step. Thankfully, Rosalie caught me before I knocked my teeth out and muttered something about me getting my eyes off of Edward's peen long enough to make it up a flight of stairs. I hadn't been looking at his crotch until she mentioned it, and then I couldn't stop looking at it.

We all greeted Carlisle and Esme warmly as they returned the sentiment. I loved that Edward and Jasper sat with their parents. Most kids wouldn't want to be caught dead with their mom and dad at a school function, but I suppose the Cullen's weren't ordinary parents. When I introduced Rosalie to them, she shook both of their hands and turned to me discreetly mouthing holy shit is he hot. I heard Edward whisper to Esme that Rose was the girl Emmett liked.

"Hey," I said, sitting directly in front of him as the girls sat surrounding me. We draped the old quilt on our laps, relishing in the warmth. Alice sat beside me, as far away from Makenna and Jasper as she could, while muttering derogatory things about Makenna.

Edward leaned forward playfully whispering, "Hey Spaz." His smirk was my kryptonite.

I melted a little before I rolled my eyes waving my finger at him. "Remember the last time you made fun of me? You wouldn't want to ruin this shirt too, would you?"

"Yeah, and you still owe me a fucking shirt, you know." He stared straight ahead with no emotion on his face. I turned back around to see the smirk again, and god I needed this boy to touch me. Esme smacked him on the arm telling him to watch his language in front of a young lady. I narrowed my eyes at the exchange. His mother was fine to touch him and so were Jasper and Emmett, but not me. That bothered me.

The parade floats and homecoming court riding in the back of a truck moved around the oval track, the nominees and the cheerleaders waving and cheering. Emmett was amongst them, with his date to the dance, Kim, sitting proudly on his lap decked out in her Pom Squad uniform. Rose's fists balled up and her fingers dug into my thigh, while I whispered soothing words to her. It wasn't working. She broke a nail and that made her even more pissed. Jared waved to her from the float, as he was also a nominee. Rose, deciding to make a show of it, stood up, waving and blowing kisses to him. Emmett was obviously bothered by this. He wrapped his arms around Kim, tickling her. Rose sat back down, with the faint hint of tears welling in her eyes. She lay her head on my shoulder and I kissed her hair.

As the game went underway, I couldn't pay close attention to any of the action because I was concentrating on Edward behind me. Not that I actually gave a crap about football, really. My body was hyperaware of his proximity- I could feel his warmth, and smell his scent and it was intoxicating, and incapacitating. I felt like a silly little girl giggling at my crush behind me.

I got a kick out of every time his mom or dad or Jasper yelled excitedly when Emmett ran a few yards with the ball. Edward remained enthusiastic but quiet. I tried my hardest not to turn and look back at him, though I really wanted to. Every now and then, his Nike's would accidentally brush my thigh when he placed his foot on the seat next to me. He would muter an apology, and I was sad about it. I wanted nothing more than for him to snuggle under the blanket with me and lace his fingers through mine, leaning over to whisper things in my ear. But I couldn't shake the feeling that was never going to happen.

We continued to watch the game all laughing and cheering as Emmett threw for 2 touchdowns and our safety intercepted another running it back for a touchdown. We were ahead 21-7 when Emmett lead the team into the locker room for half time.

Edward had excused himself just prior to head to the concession stand and before I knew it was back with hot cups of cocoa for everyone…even the bitch crew.

After halftime and the worst performance of kick line routine ever, some of the clouds shifted, letting long, bright rays of sun scatter onto the field. The massive ball of orange fire in the sky had inconveniently decided, today of all days, to make an appearance in Forks.

I couldn't see anything in the field because of the glare and the white dots floating in my line of vision from squinting. I shielded my eyes from the intense light with my hand, realizing that I had forgotten my sunglasses in the car. Edward shifted behind me and every now and then, his knees would slightly rub across my back as he adjusted his long legs. At one point he had both feet up on the bleachers on either side of me. What I wouldn't have given to be able to lean back and rest my elbows on his long thighs.

The scent of his shampoo and his cologne tinged with a hint of cigarette and chocolate twirled around in my nose. I could have just sat there and inhaled him the rest of the day and it would have been wonderful. His scent grew intensely potent as he leaned forward whispering, "Here." His baseball hat slipped on my head, warm and smelling of Edward's shampoo or his hair gel or whatever…it was absolutely amazing.

By the end of the game, the sun disappeared and it became much colder. Emmett got us one more touchdown as he lead the team to victory. Forks High Spartans managed to defeat the Port Angeles Mountain Lions 28-21, with a touchdown by Emmett in the last 5 seconds of the game. The win sent the boys into a fit of triumphant dances and mass hugging while the pissed off Mountain Lions sulked off the field. It was practically a guarantee that Emmett would be Homecoming King.

Proud of her man, but too damn stubborn to admit it, Rose wore the most beautiful smile on her face as Emmett looked up to the stands. She quickly turned it into a scowl when she saw him gaping at her. It was obviously killing her to go to the dance with someone else, but as she stated, her plan was guaranteed to work.

As the crowd rose to depart the bleachers, I stood and turned to face Edward. He was still wearing sunglasses, which I might note looked fabulous on him. I removed the hat from my head, gently placing it back on his with a smile. He didn't flinch back this time, just bowed his head forward accepting the hat back. My whole body trembled as I bid him, "Thank you," and I truly wondered why he hadn't kissed me yet, or if he was ever going to.

In my periphery, I saw his mother bite her lip, watching us. I sort of eyed her, wondering what it was about, but it seemed the whole damn family was weird, so why not her, too?

The decision was made to meet at the Ice Cream place in town. We all waited for him to emerge from the locker room before taking the short drive into town in our respective cars. We were seated at a large round table with Esme and Carlisle together and the rest of us scattered around looking awkward and uncomfortable. Who the hell thought this was a good idea?

Jasper and Makenna sat across from Alice and I, Rose and Emmett were across from each other, and Edward ended up next to me. Though Makenna came along, her bitch crew decided to stay back in Forks to get ready for the dance and I was silently thanking the ice cream gods for that since it was awkward enough as it was. The uncomfortable tension in the air was palpable. The only facial expressions were glowers and glares and the occasional uncomfortable smile and eye roll. Oh, and Carlisle's gleaming white teeth, obviously unknowing about his children's angsty drama. Yeah, this was going to be fun.

When the waitress brought our orders, all the boys including Carlisle, eagerly dove into their three course meals with the works earning a disapproving glower from Esme.

Then in the midst of quiet, Carlisle made the mistake only a completely in the dark father could make. "So guys, everyone ready for the big dance tonight?" Esme choked on her coffee, Edward dropped his fork with a startling clang, and Rose snorted at Emmett who glared right back at her. Alice looked down at her sundae and started to rip her napkins to shreds while Jasper kept eating. And I… well, I looked at the beautiful boy sitting next to me who was now cursing and wiping the ketchup off his new sweatshirt. Makenna was the only one oblivious to the situation, but she had her eyes fixed across the table on Edward and truthfully, I wanted to reach over the surface to gauge her pretty eyes out.

Mine.

We ate in relative uncomfortable silence, a few mutterings from Alice, until the waitress asked if anyone wanted anything else. In unison, everyone uttered, "No, thank you," and she began clearing empty plates.

"Well, we should probably get going soon. I have a hair appointment." Alice said coolly.

I looked at Alice incredulously, "I thought I was doing …" Rose kicked my leg way too hard, and I yelped.

"Yeah, well…I have to go pick up my shirt. It's blue because Kim likes blue…" Emmett remarked, with a sarcastic edge to his tone. His eyes narrowed at Rosalie, who just gave him a loud agitated huff while she picked at her ice cream.

"Emmett, what happened to the shirt I bought you yesterday?" Esme asked, completely confused. Emmett glared at her grumbling something incoherent, while Makenna smiled brightly.

"I got my dress at JC Penney's. And my mom's friend is letting me borrow a purse," Makenna said.

Esme looked at her with sympathy muttering, "That's great, sweetie," while Rose uttered a very disdainful, "Penney's?"

Feeling so badly for her randomness and for Rose's apparent sense of superiority, I said, "That's great Makenna." Makenna smiled across the table at Edward, who looked down into his plate.

"My dress is from LA." Alice held her head up proudly, exuding an air of definite snootiness.

Jasper said acidly, "Right Xanax, like you went to LA. My shirt is from Italy, doesn't mean I went there to get it."

"No idiot, Bella's mom sent it to me from L.A.," Alice snapped.

"Yeah well, my tie is silk… I flew to China to get it last night," Emmett said sarcastically, his mouth full of food.

Rose snorted as Makenna looked at Emmett in disbelief. "Really? Did you know that over a thousand silk worms are needed to make one inch of silk?"

"Uh, no I did not, but thanks for the trivia, Makenna," Emmett rolled his eyes.

"So very interesting, Makenna," Alice snapped.

Edward was just looking back and forth at the exchange with his bottom lip in his teeth, doing his best to not explode into laughter. It became impossibly more uncomfortable as the eye rolling, tongue clicking and audible 'tfffs' were exponentially increased.

Carlisle leaned over and whispered to Esme, "What the hell is going on?"

Esme smiled at him sweetly, replying in a whisper that only Edward and I were in earshot of. "Shhhhhh. Just sit back and watch… this is going to get interesting. I'll step in if food starts to get thrown."

Carlisle protested quietly, "But-"

She held her hand up and whispered lovingly, "Shut it, Honey."

From across the table, the animosity increased as Emmett said, "Hey Rose, looks like you broke a nail."

Ignoring them, Edward smiled at me gesturing to his plate, "French fry?" I snatched one up after drenching it in the little bowl of ketchup set on the side of his plate, because the freak had to have his ketchup separated from the rest of his food in a confined area.

Rosalie replied to Emmett curtly, "No shit, Sherlock."

Emmett retorted, "How did you do that?"

"Why do you care?" she snapped.

"Truthfully, I don't."

Rosalie spat, "Then why did you bring it up…to make me feel like shit…to bring attention to it? Maybe if I didn't wait so long to have them manicured, they wouldn't have broken. Now I have to go to a different salon to have my needs taken care of properly." Something told me they were no longer discussing fingernails.

Emmett scoffed grumbling under his breath, as Rosalie discreetly gave him the finger…the one that happened to have the broken nail was her middle.

"Real classy, Rose," Emmett spat.

"Oh, like you would know anything about class." Rose shot him daggers across the table. "Because Kim is the queen of class, isn't she?"

"Well when I win Homecoming king, then she'll be my queen," he mused.

Makenna smiled cheerily, "I saw the queen of England on TV this morning!" We couldn't figure out if the poor girl was just dying to be a part of the conversation or if she was really that dimwitted.

Edward rolled his eyes at me, bowing his head. He whispered, "Wow."

I stole another fry from him, as Alice muttered, "What a fucking idiot."

Esme said again, "That's great sweetie," patting Makenna's hand.

Edward and I continued to laugh under our breath at the whole thing while we shared fries. While the hostile banter continued, Edward dipped a fry in ketchup, handing it to me. I bit it out of his hand, and he flinched, "Watch the fingers!" He dipped another fry, moving to hand it to me, except that he snatched the fry in his own mouth, teasing me. He dipped another, playfully shoving it into his mouth before I could get it. Honestly, it was the cutest thing ever, though no one was paying attention to us but Makenna and Esme. Makenna's incessant staring was really getting on my nerves.

I grabbed the plate of fries, sliding it in front of me. Edward snatched my barely touched ice cream, sliding it in front of him, and dug into it with his spoon, laughing. Esme watched with amusement, while poor Carlisle, sat with his spoon paused at his lips watching with wide eyes at the odd hormone fueled exchanges that were taking place in from to him.

"Bella, what are you wearing tonight?" Makenna asked suddenly. I looked up at her startled, with a fry hanging out of my mouth.

"Uh, I'm not going," I said, simply.

"Oh, why not? Don't you like dances?"

With a completely straight face, Edward deadpanned, "No Bella, hates dances. Someone threw a bucket of pig's blood on her head at the last one she went to." Carlisle choked on his ice cream, while Esme patted his back with a snicker.

"Wow, Really? That's terrible!" Makenna remarked in awe. Apparently, she never saw Carrie.

I shrugged my shoulders and said, "It was awful. Bad memories." I laughed to myself thinking that little did any of them know how close I actually did come to having a Carrie prom moment.

"I'm so glad we aren't going," Edward whispered, leaning over toward me. "Too much drama." I nodded, thinking the exact opposite. Though I was glad I wasn't dealing with the bullshit that my friends were going through currently, I really would have liked to have gone. For a brief moment before Edward said anything, I even thought about asking him if he would go with me last minute. But he had said, "we" like we were one, a couple, not "I", and that made me happy for a split second.

Jasper began to whisper into Makenna's ear, while she giggled, explaining to her the movie reference. Alice huffed angrily, and stood abruptly, causing the table to bounce and glasses of water to sway and overflow as everyone stared up at her. "We have to go. I have to go to the post office to pick up a package." She looked straight at Jasper, her glare downright evil. "Special online order… from Victoria's Secret…lingerie."

Jasper looked straight at her, narrowing his eyes, he slipped his arm around Makenna's shoulders deliberately. "They sell training bras at Victoria's Secret?" Alice mouthed, "Fuck you," to Jasper, and we all sort of sat mouths agape at Alice's sudden brazenness. When Alice found her balls, I do not know, but I was glad she finally did.

"Hey, I bought my mom a sweater off of EBay last year for her birthday!" Makenna chimed, like a five year old.

Edward muttered, "Oh for the love of god…"

Esme patted her hand again, "That's nice, sweetie."

I stood understanding my cue to leave, digging into my purse for bills to pay for the ice cream. Carlisle sat back in his chair with a toothy grin. "Oh, no…we've got this, girls. Dinner and a show, and totally worth it."

"Yeah, I gotta head out too. Have to swing by the florist to pick up a corsage. Roses," Emmett said, smirking at Rosalie.

Rosalie pushed up her boobs, flinging her long blonde locks behind her shoulder. She sauntered over to Esme, extending her hand out in gratitude. Then without breaking eye contact with Emmett, Rose bent down to place a kiss on Carlisle's cheek. "Thanks for lunch, Dr. Cullen."

So awkward.

She turned, disappearing down the aisle as we all stared in disbelief at Dr. Cullen, who was completely red faced, with his mouth hanging open. Esme was hysterical next to him, covering her mouth to stifle her laughter. She leaned into her husband, whispering, "Breathe, honey," as she removed the spoon that was frozen in midair from his fingers.

"Hey, listen, B," Edward said as he stood. I looked up at him hoping he wasn't about to do anything to make the situation even more awkward that in was. "Since the party is only a few blocks from our houses, do you want to maybe, walk over there…together?"

Tongue tied and elated, I nodded my head about a hundred times, before I sputtered, "Um…yeah, well sure, okay, that's great…walking...together…awesome."

Dear God, stop laughing at me and just kill me now.

Out of the corner of my eye, I spotted his hat hanging off the back of his chair. I swiped it, placing it on my head, before I thanked the Cullen's for lunch as Alice linked her arm through mine. When we were almost at the entrance where Rose was waiting with her arms crossed, I turned when Edward called my name. "Hey Bella, be ready by ten, okay? And I want my hat back."

I shook my head, batting my eyelashes. "I guess now I owe you a shirt and a hat." He stood in the aisle, his eyes blazes of green, smirking. The girls slipped out ahead of me, and I placed my fingers to my lips, blowing Edward a quick kiss. His smirk never left his face as he caught the air, before shoving his hand into his pocket with a roll of his eyes.

I was absolutely giddy with the confirmation that he did save my kiss the last time.

"Bella, stop staring at Edward's crotch," Rose whispered, as she pulled me out the front door.

I got ready fairly quickly, throwing on my favorite dark jeans, a cute little black top and my black stiletto boots. I left my hair down, curling it in to big lose waves, slapped on a little makeup, and headed over to Alice's armed with my beauty arsenal.

Alice was in her bathrobe, pacing. She was so nervous, and still a bit hostile from earlier. She took a quick swig of a small bottle of vodka she had stashed in her drawer wincing as it went down. I took a swig as well, hissing at the burn in my throat. Once the iron was hot, I curled her long hair as she requested, but by the time I finished applying her makeup, the curls had all fallen out of her fine hair. I teased it instead, puffing the top part up and pulling the rest back into a ponytail. A glittery headband over her silky locks made it perfect. Together, we slipped the dress over her head and laughed at the giant red kiss print she had on the butt of her black boy shorts.

We talked about the game and the complete debacle that was lunch, and she mentioned that she was having second thoughts about Edward being gay. Alice insisted that he was being flirtatious with me, sharing his fries and giving me his hat at the game. But then she suggested he may be bi, not necessarily gay, and I groaned, taking another swig of her vodka.

"I am proud of you Al," I said, changing the subject. She peered down at me questioningly, as I fastened the strap of her shoe around her ankle. "For standing up to Jasper today. I don't know why you let him talk down to you at all."

"I don't know either. He just makes me so nervous, and I go shooting my mouth all over the place whenever I'm near him."

"You didn't today," I remarked.

"Yeah, that's because I was so mad. How the hell can he like that nimrod Makenna, over me? She's got an IQ of a snail."

I shrugged. "She's easy? I don't know, Alice. Jasper can be really sweet for the most part, but he can also be a big dick when he wants to be. Maybe Jasper's not even right for you...maybe you should just consider dating Alec."

"No, Alec knows I don't like him like that. I mean he's cute and everything, but we fool around because it's comfortable…and there's no pressure. He's in love with Jane anyway."

"Jane? Lunch table Jane?" I asked in disbelief. She was attractive and if I thought about it, she and Alec did make a cute couple, but I never saw the girl outside of the cafeteria.

"Yeah, her parents are really strict. Her sister got pregnant when she was like fifteen, so they don't let Jane go to parties or dances or date at all. I feel bad for her actually. Alec and I are essentially using each other until we both get who we want." She tugged on the ankle strap and lifted her foot to admire the shoe. "Regardless of the fact that he is a complete douche sometimes, I am crazy about Jasper, Bella. Just like you are crazy for Edward." She looked up at me forlorn.

"Alright, well if you're going to continue pining for Jasper, then at least make him stop calling you Xanax." I said, brushing out her long ponytail. I spritzed some more hairspray on her head and stood back to admire my work.

She shook her head. "Bella, I know it's derogatory, but at least he's calling me something." I looked at her questioningly before I realized what it meant. "I'm not like you and Rose. You are both gorgeous and stylish and you know how to flirt…I'm just sweet little Alice Brandon. Boring and plain," she scowled. I tugged her up by the shoulders, facing her toward the mirror.

"Well, you're not so sweet or boring tonight." Alice smile brightly at the reflection in the mirror. She looked stunning. With her hair back like that and her eyes smoky, she looked older, sophisticated and sexy. Alice's arms squeezed tightly around my waist in gratitude, just as the doorbell rang. Peering out her window, I asked, "Little blue car?" She nodded confirming that it was Alec and we descended the stairs. I said hello to Alec, and good bye to Alice, wishing them both a good time.

It was only just after eight as I crossed the street back toward home. I was a little saddened by watching Alice and Alec, and I think the few swigs of alcohol had gotten to me. I wanted a cigarette, and debated on going to Edward's to ask him for one, but I didn't want to seem overly eager. He was coming to get me in two hours. Technically it wasn't a date, since it was only walking to a party a block away, but it was something, and we were doing it together.

I waved to Emmett who was in his driveway, sliding into his freshly washed black Range Rover. He was dressed in a royal blue shirt, yellow tie and black pants…very school spirited. The night was quiet save for the sound of someone strumming a guitar in the distance. I remembered the blanket still in my car from the game, and the giant bag of M&M's I bought to keep in the tree house.

Both items in hand, I opened the gate to my yard, using the bright moonlight as guide down the path. It was creepy and if it weren't for the sound of music floating from the direction of the tree house, I would have been petrified. I did not like the dark, however, my curiosity was piqued.

Just through the trees in the clearing, I could make out Edward's silhouette. He was sitting on one of the swings, guitar in hand, strumming quietly. I stood frozen, holding my breath… completely enraptured. The bluish moonlight shone down on his dark hair, casting eerie shadows and highlighting the strong lines of his profile. His lips were pursed as he looked down at the instrument, strumming random notes. He found a tune he was comfortable with and suddenly began to sing. I gasped, clutching the blanket and ridiculously large bag of candy to my chest, feeling voyeuristic, and shameful but not daring to move an inch. I wouldn't have missed it for the world.

His voice, calling to me in the moonlight night was like liquid silk, soft yet slightly raspy and masculine and just so…Edward.

"And I'd give up forever to touch you

Cause I know that you feel me somehow

You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be

And I don't want to go home right now…"

I had no idea if it was a coincidence, and I had not a clue if he was singing about me.

I could only hope.

~%~