Chapter 9

Harry sat at the kitchen table, yawning widely and sipping on a glass of pumpkin juice. He was trying to read the Daily Prophet, but kept staring at the same sentence over and over while he retreated into his thoughts. It was quite early in the morning, Sirius wasn't even out of bed yet. Harry had been woken early by his usual nightmares and he had given up on trying to get back to sleep, so here he was in the kitchen instead.

Drifting off into his thoughts again, Harry mused over the conversation he'd had with Ron and Hermione in the mirror a few days ago. Ron had angrily ranted to Harry about how twisted Umbridge was, and how she wasn't even going to let them use any defensive magic in their lessons. It was ridiculous, and Harry could see how it all tied in to Fudge's ridiculous notion about Dumbledore wanting to overthrow the Ministry of Magic. Maybe he was too scared to even let the students of Hogwarts learn offensive magic in case they used it on him? Whatever was going through his thick mind, it was wrong. Harry worried for Ron and Hermione, and all the other students, especially the ones taking OWLs this year. How would they pass if they weren't allowed to practise the spells that they were learning about?

As if that wasn't bad enough, it seemed that there was a large amount of distrust spreading through the school about whether Voldemort was actually back. Hermione had gently told Harry that Seamus Finnigan's mother had nearly pulled him out of Hogwarts because she didn't believe the so called 'lies' that Harry and Dumbledore were spreading. Seamus, it appeared, agreed with her. He had been arguing with Ron about whether Harry was 'messed up in the head'. Harry got extremely angry at this point and flung the mirror across the room, luckily not breaking it. He apologised to Ron and Hermione and ended the call, spending that night lying awake restlessly and thinking about how unfair this whole situation was. Why on earth would he lie about how Cedric had died? Did they really think he was that desperate for attention that he would pretend to have duelled Voldemort? Harry was infinitely grateful for Ron and Hermione standing up for him, and staying loyal to him.

As Harry sat at the kitchen table, absently staring into space and not noticing the fact that he was dunking his newspaper into his pumpkin juice, his thoughts drifted off into the now familiar direction of Sirius. His mind went back to a few days ago when they had been relaxing in the living room in the evening. Sirius had been stretched out on the sofa, engrossed in a book, and Harry couldn't keep his eyes off him. He had been wearing tight trousers, a button up shirt with the sleeves rolled up and the top few buttons undone to reveal a tantalising amount of smooth chest. His face was a picture of concentration, a tiny furrow between his brows as he focused on the words he was reading. His eyes looked so deep and intense that Harry badly wished they were focussed on him.

Harry groaned, realising that he had been thinking about it again. This had to stop! Sirius had caught him staring once or twice, and winked at him so suggestively that Harry had nearly died of embarrassment. Why did Sirius have to be so damn gorgeous? Harry asked himself this question several times a day and still had no answer. It wasn't just his looks that Harry was admiring, he had realised. He was noticing little things about Sirius that endeared him to Harry, and made him smile.

There was the fact that he was an incredibly brave man. He had stood up to his parents about their beliefs when he was just a teenager, run away from home and had to fend for himself. Not to mention the bravery and strength of mind he had shown by lasting twelve years in Azkaban without losing his sanity. He may be reckless, but Harry loved his mischievous streak. He had a great sense of humour, and still loved to pull pranks when he got the chance. Exceptionally bright and intelligent, Sirius had got top grades at school and Harry had seen him do some incredible magic. He had been only fifteen when he had managed to turn into his Animagus form which was no mean feat.

All of this blended together into one amazing, attractive man, and Harry was getting worried about just how strong his feelings for Sirius were becoming. He tried to think back to when he had begun to think about Sirius in this way, but it seemed like it had been a slow transition from admiring him as a godfather figure to…whatever this was now. It was bloody confusing, if Harry was perfectly honest, but it just felt so right. He sighed, thinking about how Sirius must feel being in this house. It wasn't just the fact that he wasn't allowed outside, it was the memories that must be tormenting him all the time. His childhood had been an unhappy one, and now he was forced to recall this every day that he was stuck in this place. Harry wished there was something he could do to help.

As Harry was pondering this, the man himself walked into the room and sat down opposite him.

"Morning Harry. Why are you putting your newspaper in your pumpkin juice?" Sirius asked him with an amused voice. Harry looked down and hastily removed it, feeling his cheeks turn red in embarrassment.

"Oops," he laughed it off and stretched, yawning again. "What are we doing today, Snuffles?"

"Actually, I have some news that you might like," Sirius said thoughtfully.

"Oh yeah? What is it?" Harry asked eagerly.

"Well, Dumbledore came by last night when you were in bed and had some interesting things to tell me. To start off, he mentioned that you actually got off very lightly at the Ministry hearing. Turns out Fudge was so enthusiastic about expelling you and proving you wrong, that he forgot the most important part about it."

"Which is what?" Harry asked impatiently.

"Your wand. He was supposed to snap it when you were expelled, because only trained overage wizards are allowed to use magic unless they're in school."

Harry gasped, his face turning white. He suddenly remembered what Hagrid had told him about his own expulsion. The Ministry had snapped his wand in half, stopping him from doing magic.

"So you're saying the Ministry are going to make me give up my wand?" Harry said, terrified.

"No, no, wait! There's more. Dumbledore pointed out the fact that you're living in a house which is protected by the Fidelius charm. It's a pretty powerful piece of magic, and this is where it gets interesting. The Trace, which is the method the Ministry use to detect any underage magic, is a type of tracking spell. And because the basic foundations of the spell are built on tracing a person's whereabouts, the spell doesn't work on someone that is being hidden by the Fidelius charm!" Sirius said triumphantly. Harry gaped at him, his mouth hanging open.

"You mean I can do magic in here and the Ministry won't know about it?" Harry asked excitedly.

"Exactly!"

"Wait, wait. You said Fudge forgot to snap my wand at my hearing, so surely that means he's going to try to find me so that he can do it. I know he can't find me here, but surely I'm going to be in more trouble by evading him? He's not going to just stop searching for me because I'm not at Privet Drive."

"That is an issue…Dumbledore is doing his best to sort it out, but as you know he isn't exactly in favour with the Ministry at the moment. It's looking quite likely that Fudge is going to work out that Dumbledore knows exactly where you are, and they'll try to get it out of him."

"So the only thing standing between the Ministry and me is Dumbledore…that's just great," Harry said moodily. His confidence in the headmaster had reached an all-time low recently, and this didn't seem like great news. However, he figured it was best to focus on the good thing that had come from this. "But still, I can do magic here for the time being!" Harry said excitedly.

"Yeah, which brings me to my second point," Sirius said, smiling at him. "I've been thinking about the fact that you won't be learning any magic if you're not at school. I discussed it with Remus, and he thinks it would be a good idea for the both of us to use our collective knowledge to teach you some stuff that might come in handy."

This sounded amazing to Harry. Learning new magic with Sirius as his teacher? He grinned widely, filling with an excited agitation.

"Wow, that sounds awesome! When can we start? He asked Sirius quickly, earning an amused smile in return.

"Well, I have a list of spells here that we brainstormed earlier. Remus is busy at the moment but we could start after breakfast if you don't mind it being just you and me." Sirius said lightly.

"Of course I don't mind!" Harry said without a second thought. The idea of being taught one on one by Sirius was a very good thought indeed. He blushed, his traitorous thoughts showing him ideas of something else he could do one on one with Sirius…this thought distracted him for the next few minutes and before he knew it they had finished breakfast and Sirius was beckoning him into the drawing room where he thought it would be best to practice spells.

They headed into the room, and Sirius pushed the furniture to the side of the room with a flick of his wand so they'd have space to work with.

"Ok, I have something special for us to work on today…" Sirius said, with a mischievous glint in his eye. Harry listened carefully, intrigued to see what was in store for him. "It's not something that will ever be on the curriculum at Hogwarts, that's for sure…and we'll have to work on boring stuff eventually because Moony will find out and tell us off otherwise, but I was thinking, if you're interested, maybe you could start working on becoming an Animagus!"

Sirius said all of this very quickly, obviously enthusiastic but worried that Harry would say no. On the contrary, Harry was extremely excited. It sounded like complex magic that would take a lot of time and effort to perfect, but he was fascinated by the idea of being able to turn into an animal. He wondered what animal he would be…an image appeared in his mind of him perfecting his Animagus form only to find that he was a slug.

"That sounds great to me, Sirius…" Harry said, smiling at him. "But what if I turn into something ridiculous like a slug or a stick insect or something."

Sirius laughed, and reassured him. "You won't turn into something ridiculous, Harry. The animal you turn into usually reflects your physical appearance, and elements of your personality and characteristics. Why do you think I turn into a dog?"

"You're incredibly loyal," Harry began, smiling hesitantly at Sirius, "and can be playful and excitable. Not to mention your disregard for rules. You're just a disobedient puppy, aren't you?" Harry said teasingly and Sirius gave a bark-like laugh.

"You summed me up pretty well there, Harry," he said affectionately. "Now it's my turn to describe you…" He looked into Harry's eyes searchingly, and Harry blushed at the attention. "Well, to start off you're probably the bravest man I know…" Sirius looked at him intently, sending shivers down his spine, "you're loyal, kind, caring…and not to mention, you've grown up to be an attractive young man…" Sirius finished in a rough whisper.

Harry's heart started racing at twice its normal speed, and goosebumps rose up all over his body. Had he really just heard Sirius say that? He looked up and saw Sirius' eyes staring into his own. Their proximity was so close that he could almost feel electricity shooting between them…Harry felt Sirius' hand reach up and gently stroke the side of his face, almost tenderly, and he closed his eyes, enjoying the sensation. Every sense was heightened, he could hear Sirius' breath drawing almost imperceptibly closer to him. Harry opened his eyes slightly, looking up at Sirius through his lashes, and saw the hungry look in his eyes.

Before he knew what was happening, Sirius' lips were pressing gently on his own. Harry gasped slightly before kissing him back, hesitantly wrapping his arms around his waist and pulling them closer together. It felt incredible, exhilarating…Sirius' lips were soft and dominant, and Harry moaned as he felt his tongue slide sensually along his bottom lip. He opened his mouth and allowed Sirius to dart his tongue in, feeling waves of pleasure radiate through him. Harry responded with equal intensity and revelled in the taste of Sirius' tongue. After a while they pulled away from each other to catch their breath, and Sirius looked at Harry with wide, lust-filled eyes. Seconds later, however, Sirius shook his head and blinked, a look of horror suddenly taking over his face. Staggering backwards slightly, he pulled his arms away from Harry as if burned.

"Oh Merlin, what have I done?" he said in a tortured voice, and he turned and strode from the room, slamming the door behind him.

Harry could only stand there, looking blankly at the space where Sirius had been a minute ago, waiting for his brain to catch up. He had just gone from deliriously happy to confused and hurt within seconds. Sirius had kissed him…but he regretted it. The look on his face had been so angry as he left the room. Harry collapsed onto the floor weakly and put his head in his hands. He tried to stop it, but he couldn't help the tears that started falling. Hours later, that was how a concerned Remus found him, curled up on the floor of the Drawing room with tears still falling steadily down his face.

Oh God I'm sorry for the ending! Stay tuned for the next chapter, and hopefully it'll all get better :) please review!