Alright guys, I truly believe this is the finest thing I have ever written. Enjoy!
Oh I don't own Fairy Tail
Giggling a maniacal laugh, Cana lurched forward and yanked the lacrima out of Mirajane's hands.
"Ohoho, this will be fun!" Cana shouted.
"Yeah, for you!" Macao huffed back.
Nodding in consent the guilds could only imagine the types of comments that would erupt from Cana's unfiltered mouth. She was the definition of speaking before your brain caught up with your words.
Mirajane gathered everyone's attention as the drunken brunette cackled.
"Everyone, it's really late and I don't know when the next chapter is coming in! Let's all sleep and then read the next one tomorrow."
The shocked members looked outside to realize it was indeed nighttime. Time had flown by for them.
As Fairy Tail started leaving to go home, the other guild milled around confused.
"Where should we sleep Rogue?" "I don't know idiot. You said you had everything covered." Sting looked over to Lector for help and all he got in return was a shrug.
"Ahem!" The remaining guilds looked up at Markov who had got their attention. "We had prepared for the girls to sleep in Fairy Hills and room with Fairy Tail girls. As for guys, well, figure it out yourself."
The girls looked relieved but the guys looked even more panicked. "What!"
"Guess I'll have to room with you Juvia!" Lyon said, reaching out to the water mage.
She quickly scurried away proclaiming something about loyalty to Gray-sama.
Markov burst into laughter and the boys looked at him puzzled. "You *wheeze* should have *wheeze* seen your faces! Of course we prepared something for the boys. You guys will use the guest rooms in the guild."
The guys would have been pleased had they not been angered by being tricked.
And so the group were soon resting soundly in a bed, their dreams filled with action and romance. Well, maybe just action for the guys.
Meanwhile Max slept soundly in his room, his mind concocting a fantastical dream.
Max walked in just as the rest of the guilds poured in. Grabbing a seat he looked up to the stage where Mirajane was standing.
"Alright guys, here's the new fanfiction! As you all know the other guild will once again be joining us! Right, here it is"
CinderMax By: Max's Brain
Max growled as he mopped up the floor. It was the day before the ball and he had yet to figure out a plan to sneak out.
"CINDERMAX! I NEED MY HAIR DONE!" "NO I GET MINE DONE FIRST!" "SHUT UP EVERGREEN!" "NO YOU SHUT UP JENNY!"
"Why the heck am I always the bad guy?!" Jenny screeched.
"It's because your personality just fits so well. It's nothing personal I'm sure." Mirajane replied with a smirk.
"The more important question is why is Max in a fanfiction?" Chelia question.
"Ahem, why can't I be in one?" Max growled.
The guild went dead silent at that one.
"Wait, why can't I be in one?"
Cana slurred, "Miraaaaa keep readinggggg."
Little did Max know, Cana was perfectly sober (well as sober as Cana can be), she just saved everyone's butts.
Max sighed, peering into his water bucket. He abandoned his mopping to go attend to the ladies.
He stalked upstairs, angrily pulling his skirts after him. Yes skirts.
"Bwahaha! You wear a skirt!" Natsu laughed.
"Nab does too!" a Fairy Tail member shouted.
"Oh yeah! Hahaha!" "Natsu that's not nice," Lucy scolded, slapping his head. "But still funny!"
Why he was never given a guy's set of clothing was mysterious to him.
He walked into Evergreen's room first, knowing she would probably murder him whereas Jenny would just hurt him pretty bad.
Grabbing a brush while walking to her he quickly planned out her hair based on her dress. A long gown mean he would make a braided bun with feathers.
The gown of course was a floor length that had a tight bodice that skirts flowed out from. It was green and the patterns were sown in with gold. Overall it was expensive as hell and probably worth more than Max's life.
After piling the hair spray on he exited her room to go help Jenny.
Her dress was also a floor length gown that was pink. Veins of silver and gold ran through the top bodice and the sleeves were long sleeves. The skirt also pooled out and was a simple baby pink.
Max decided to let her hair down and add curls that framed her face. He also added a pink flower in her hair.
"Hey Max can you actually do that? Because if you can you should totally help me before the winter party."
Suddenly a poof was heard. "Ebi, am I getting a run for my money ebi?" Cancer asked, glaring at Max.
"No! I can't actually do that!"
Cancer looked at him once more holding two fingers up to his eye and pointing them at Max as in 'I'm watching you.'
With the girls ready they walked downstairs and greeted their mother. "Ah Max, thank you for helping my daughters get ready, just in time for the ball." Angel smiled cattily at him.
"Mother, could I go to the ball too? I finished all my chores and even made my own suit!"
The three girls exchanged glances before bursting into laughter. "First off Ever and I destroyed the suit," Jenny gloated.
"Second to think that you could ever go to a ball makes me laugh!" Evergreen screeched.
"Third, no," Angel ended.
Max felt tears burning behind his eyes as he ran off, leaving the three woman howling with laughter behind him.
He ran into the garden and collapsed at a stone bench, wishing for a better life.
Suddenly he heard a tinkling. Looking up he saw leaves swirling around and then they dispersed to reveal a woman.
She had long brown hair, a pretty face. She wore a short dress that was blue with a lot of ruffles.
"Stoooopid dressss, I knew I sohuldn't habe worn these heeeeels to that party." And was very clearly drunk.
She looked up, startled to see him. "Hmmm I guess I messed up the transportation spellll. Why are you crying, huh?"
"Are you my fairy godmother?" Max whispered back.
"HAHAHA, no just a drunk fairy lost on her way home. Buttt I suppose I can help youuuu it might help me get back in the good graces ob the highber ups. Know what I mean?"
"Uhhh no." "Regardless, fairy godmother Cana at your service!" She gave an exaggerated bow only to tip over. Picking herself of she giggled, the turned to him.
"So what's got your panties in a twist?" she asked. Max looked shocked at her state but quickly responded. "My step mother isn't letting me go to the ball. I have no way of getting there and her daughters destroyed my suit."
"Leave that up to ol' Cana." She turned around and began to wave her wand that appeared out of know where. Well, you could call it a want but it was actually a beer bottle.
Max watched in fascination as the mice around the garden turned to coach men and horses. A pumpkin turned into a carriage. And just as the spell was about to finish, the mice reverted and the carriage turned into a bicycle.
His mouth dropped open until he felt the magic around him. Looking down he saw his clothes begin to transform.
He opened his eyes when he felt them stop, feeling oddly weighed down. When he looked down he saw he was wearing a floor length blue gown and on his feet were crystal heels.
Max looked anywhere but forward as the guild hall vibrated with the amount of laughter in it.
"Of course Max gets Cana as his fairy godmother! Hahaha!" Sting shouted. "It seems drunk fairies equal botched up magic." Rogue commented.
"Or, she did it on purpose to get a good laugh!" Cana herself laughed. More like manically laughed. There was no doubt in anyone's mind that Cana purposely would have done such a thing had she been in the story as her actual self.
"What the heck?" he shouted.
"What?" she shrugged, "you just asked a drunk fairy to help you and you expect better? You were even wearing a dress when I got here, why is this one worse. It's a pretty fantastic dress if I do say so myself. I mean check out your shoes."
Max looked mortified at the thought of going to the ball like this, but he was determined to go. "Can you at least give me a wig?"
"Hon, a wig is not going to help considering you have a very stubbly beard on your face," she responded, still handing one over.
He grimaced then stalked over to the bike, hopped on the pedaled off into the night.
About an hour later, he finally arrived at the ball.
He placed the wig on, then a mask, thanking his lucky stars it was a masked ball.
Parking his bike behind the castle bushed, he walked up to the entrance, pretending like he hadn't just biked a few miles.
Entering the ball, he felt all eyes on him as he walked down the stairs.
The prince, the only one not masked, held his hand out to Max and asked "Would you like to dance?"
"Uh no, no I think I'm good," Max responded, raising the pitch of his voice.
The prince looked shocked then recovered, walking over to another girl and asking the same question.
Later into the night as Max nursed a drink, he realized something. This was the most boring thing. The entire time the prince just ran around flirting with girls and all the girls were just fighting to get to the prince. There was no entertainment other than dancing or talking and he knew no one here.
And so he did the only think sensible. He left.
As he rode himself home he felt the bike collapse underneath him. Tumbling down he looked over to the bike only to find a pumpkin. His clothes had also reverted back to normal.
"That stupid fairy didn't tell me there was a time limit!" he angrily shouted. He grabbed the pumpkin and got up and began the long walk home.
Upon reaching home he kicked of his shoes then went to his room. Laying on the bed was a broom. Max looked at it confused.
When had that gotten there? He reached over to pick it up, only for it to move.
The broom moved to 'look up' at him and beckoned him over. Patting the spot next to it, the broom scooted over.
Max sat down, and feeling comfortable explained all his annoyances to the broom. Well into the night he chatted with the broom, feeling more understood than ever before.
And so their relationship began. Every evening after work, he would come in his room and cuddle with Broom or talk about his problems. And the broom would listen, it always did.
They talked about growing old together, maybe even getting married. But one thing was sure, they loved each other.
And they lived happily ever after. The End.
There was shocked silence, which suddenly turned to laughter and people attempting to breathe through the giggles.
Max looked annoyed till he got up. "I admit it. I love Broom! And none of you can stop our love!" He ran over and grabbed a broom leaning on the wall and hugged it.
The next morning Max awoke with a smile on his face.
I thought some pure humor would be a nice break. I'm still working on the next chapter but guys I do try to update as much as I can. I'm sorry if I don't update as much as you like but I am super busy! I don't mean to be rude or attack anyone because I'm not trying to. I just hope you guys can understand when I don't update as fast as you wish. And no I have not given up on Guild Mates or Guild Mates, this was just a small break!