Chapter 5

So apparently it's now been several sunrises since the last chapter, but already our favorite protagonist already has a firm grasp on the names of some of the herbs. The first line is him giving some tansy to Dovewing for her sore throat. And StarClan forbid Dovewing have any kind of important roll in the story- after all she was only the savior of all the Clans in the last series.

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And Erin Hunter has completely forgotten Dovewing is even there after the first paragraph. I'm reading ahead just to see if Dovewing is mentioned at all and nope. It never says that she left the medicine cat's den, but she also never says another word or is mentioned by the others. Good job, Erin Hunter, you done goofed again.

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Well, at least we are acknowledging Briarlight. Jayfeather tasked Alderpaw in tossing a mossball for the crippled cat to catch so she could get some exercise. It's a decently good scene I will- oh snap, I just realized I'm starting to refer to the Jayfeather as if he isn't me. Sorry, I will try to not slip up again.

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I actually seem upset that Leafpool is off helping Littlecloud in ShadowClan. I forgot how odd the cannon Jayfeather is some times. The real me- me could care less what she was doing. In fact, I really wanted the opportunity to shine as the only med cat. Was a little dissapointed when I read in Bramblestar's Storm that Leafpool was being made a med cat again...

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And insert emergency here. Cherryfall is hurt in the woods. I wonder what this means for our young protagonist. Hold on, let me read on before I say anything else...

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Mmm, okay. So apparently Cherryfall and Sparkpaw went off towards thetwolegplace on the border with ShadowClan and Cherryfall slipped and cut herself on some twoleg rubbish.

Can we stop to analyze this whole situation? Firstly, how does a cat trip and impale iteslf on anything? Cat's are immensely graceful in real life. Erin Hunter makes cats seem so clumsy sometimes. Don't get me started on the whole 'cat falls out of tree and dies or breaks leg' because real cats can fall immense distances without even getting a cut, but in these stories, cat falls a couple mouse-lengths and there is gushing blood...

Also, it says that I struggle to move quickly through the woods because of my blindness. I'm pretty sure this isn't true at all. I don't even have to evaluate on that because it's just bloody obvious that Erin likes to make a fool of me.

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And that's it. That's the whole chapter. We get Cherryfall back to camp and I tell Alderpaw to take the rest of the day off... Yeah, what a boring chapter- oh AND DOVEWING MUST STILL BE IN THE MEDICINE CAT'S DEN CHEWING ON THE TANSY ALDERPAW GAVE HER because she still hasn't been mentioned again since the very first paragraph.

And in the final paragraph Sparkpaw calls Alderpaw a 'daft' furball. I doubt she even knows the definition of that word.