Chapter Nine

Nagisa didn't look right. Not just to Karma and Gakushuu. Nearly everyone could tell something was wrong. Even when she laughed and smiled, the greyness in her bright blue eyes was visible.

What was worse was that for once, her boyfriend was unsure on what to do with her. He had taken her out and brought her things and showered her with kisses, and when that had stopped working he had tried just talking to her. Karma had even stopped his forceful touches to her. It always ended in the same way though. Just when he would think he had gotten somewhere with uncovering some small issue she had agreed to, she would smile and kiss him lightly and thank him for cheering her up, making it painfully clear to him that nothing had been changed - that he had barely scratched her suddenly so powerful and protective surface.

Unbearably, after hearing her speak, her dissatisfaction would become less obvious, planting doubts in him that she was even upset at all. In fact most of the time he wouldn't notice her distance until he asked her something personal and she tensed up.

Where had this come from so suddenly?

"Nagisa-"

"We're going out again today?" She had a small knowing smile playing on her lips. However, this assured no comforts.

"Yes. To the arcade today. Are you excited?"

Her eyes didn't meet his, but her teeth grazed her lip, "I-I don't know if I have the money actually."

"I'm paying," He tutted, "Besides, you'll pay me back just by being with me, won't you?"

Her eyes shook as she nodded. The expression could easily be compared to fear. The redhead was unsure of how much more of this he could take.

"As long as you promise not to spend any more than twenty?"

"Does food count?"

"I guess not."

"Then I promise." His eyes scrutinised her over head to toe once again, this time taking several seconds as she was talking with him. When it was her and someone else his looks took minutes. When it was just her in class, it of course lasted hours until he could look away. Even after that he wasn't completely satisfied.

"I'll see you in class."

Nagisa took the hint and left him. When she found herself at the doors of the main building, she turned back, and with his hands in his pockets, he was still there, still staring.

She sighed.

"Nagisa!"

Gakushuu's purple eyes were way too close, his voice way too loud and sudden to the point that her surprise sent her back a few steps, but not nearly far as the she would have liked. The feel of his hands around her clothed shoulders only made this worse, tensed visually, eyes narrowing in annoyance.

"What did I say about touching me."

The girl's body slipped away from his otherwise strong grasp with the lack of effort that came from dealing with dating someone full of surprise imprisonments like this. Though his intentions of restraining her didn't go unnoticed and she felt her resentment towards him growing in suspicion.

But of course, that slipped away when she had enough distance between them to fully see his face. Her heart melted at the pain, concern, care and guilt all over his features, weakening the hatred she felt in her stomach until it was nearly nonexistent.

He didn't do anything to chase her, he just waited for her to slip through his fingers without forcing her, something she was so unused to she actually felt nervous when she realised it was her responsibility to instigate their conversation.

"You don't have anything to say?"

She stepped closer, it took her a lot of nerve to do so, but she knew without needing convincing that he wouldn't harm her. Not when Karma was most likely watching them anyway.

He clearly didn't know what to do with his hands, frowning and pressing them into his thighs. "We need to talk."

"I'm asking you to talk right now."

"I think we should be able to more personally." He looked over both shoulders, he wouldn't see Karma but the latter could definitely see him.

Nagisa didn't look entertained, she followed him to a quiet part of the hallway regardless.

"Nagisa," He repeated, looking at her in endearment. "You're not happy with Karma are you?"

Her face fell. The blunette didn't even have the time to answer.

"I can see it in your face, I've seen how he can treat you badly in class so I can only assume he's even worse behind closed doors. You don't need that in your life. I'm sorry Nagisa but for you... i-if you stay with that guy any longer you won't be the same person anymore. I can already see the draining effect it's had on you..." His eyes were becoming hazy.

It was about this point that Nagisa realised her mistake, shrinking back and blocking out his words, all too able to tell where this was going.

"...I would never do that to you. I would make sure you're happy. Can't you give me another chance?"

Unfortunately, this was more than just him trying to worm his way back into her life. She had already earnestly told him of her love for Karma, that Gakushuu should have no hope in them being together, yet here he was looking at her so convinced of himself she almost felt guilty in turning him down. It was like he had forced himself to forget that night.

Her voice was dry when her mouth opened. His eyes glimmered with hope.

Crushing him with her words clearly wasn't working. Why couldn't there be another way.

"You're delusional. Karma and I are happy together. I know this upsets you but you're gonna have to respect that."

His hand found her shoulder before she could escape. The touch held neither force nor threat, gently there as if to comfort her, recapturing her attention to him.

"That's just the thing. You don't know what it's like to be in a positive relationship, I fear that you're the one who's delusional, Nagisa. When you're with me it will be clear that he's been exploiting you." He spoke gently.

Her breath hitched. Only half because he was right. The boy had a manipulative, self righteous, self empowering gleam in his eyes as he spoke that was revolting enough to make her slap his hand off of her.

"No Gakushuu. You're delusional if you can't see that it's your actions that have made me feel like my whole world has been dipped in depressing grey paint since you did what you did. Do you need more? You're the one who exploited my trust, remember? You're the one who decided what I wanted didn't matter, you're the one who made me unhappy and you're the one who I just want to stay away from."

As venomous as she thought she had been, the image of a sweet little blue haired girl in ponytails wasn't one she could escape. The world just loved to distort its view of her. Instead of the realisation and understanding she had wanted to see, she was met with the same disappointed pitying look down on the poor, gullible girl before him.

If Nagisa hadn't forced herself to disappear at that moment by merging into a crowd, Gakushuu would have been the one to go missing.

"Right there between the trees! Shoot it!"

Karma's body pressed into her, numbing her fingers before she could even process his words. Her heart burned with the anxiety. Where would he choose to violate her this time?

But his hands only guided the plastic gun in her grasp, taking aim and planting a bullet accurately into the brain of their assassination target, filling up her screen with virtual coins.

"Daydreamy," He accused as he tugged on her cheek, keeping her between his arms as he placed down the weapon and collected their ticket prize. "I'm telling you they'll kill you if you don't kill them first."

She could hear the affection in his voice, hardly capable of suppressing a grateful smile.

"That's just sad," A voice scoffed, "All over each other in an arcade... some people are just disgusting"

"They have no shame. Maybe they like the attention?"

Nagisa was used to it by now, her smile didn't fade but Karma whispered to her anyway. "We do like the attention don't we? It's clear they're just admiring you."

She stiffened. That was something someone exploiting her would say...

She tried to put some distance between them, trying to speak. They only parted in time to gasp as Karma tilted her back to kiss her cheek show-off-ishly, making her giggle.

"I'm so glad I have a pretty girl like you in my life~" He cooed loudly.

All three of the teens that had just passed gagged, but not a single one of the scrawny boys could take their eyes away.

"They have low self esteem that's for sure. Maybe their parents don't approve, that's why they have to act like that here."

That last remark had gotten Karma's attention. He scowled, pulling his girlfriend up, his eyes darkened.

"Those kids.." He glowered.

Nagisa smiled, straightening the collar of his school shirt. "You want to destroy them in every game they play?" She suggested innocently.

He grinned back maniacally, "Why do you get me so well?" He cooed before pulling her into the darkness to follow the trio.

The day had won them two iced slushes, a boat of chips and a pair of identical victory rings you could have gotten attached to a girls magazine. (Not to mention the emotional enjoyment of taking on a group of nerds that considered themselves kings here in the arcade only to destroy them in nearly every game).

They both wore their prizes proudly on their wedding finger regardless. Nagisa felt cheered up enough to laugh several times, wearing a natural smile as they walked home. But as usual, there was something off about her, something she was hiding.

Karma wanted to do nothing more than watch her face, then to kiss her lips and hear her speak, laugh and scream. He couldn't do that if she insisted on hiding things.

"Nagisa," She met his gaze innocently. It seemed she had forgotten her problems for now. He knew this was horrible of him, but he was about to say something really personal, something he knew would likely end her bliss and shove her tensions back into her face almost violently.

"I love you."

Her boyfriend had said it before. He had met her eyes as he had said it. But he had never looked so serious or sincere. He wasn't smiling, he wasn't focused on eliciting a reaction from her, he wasn't even darkened or hazy in the eyes. The words had come honestly from himself.

She froze, looking up at him unconscious of her vivid blush, of the fact that she seemed to have forgotten how to breathe or even of the fact that her vision was become less and less clear as she repeated the words back to him.

"I love you too Karma."

Tears spilled from her eyes, but she acted like she hadn't noticed, looking away, neglecting their existence and refusing to even blink them away or wipe away the pail stains against her cheek's pink. Her hair covered her eyes, but that was her natural reaction to hide her blush. The redhead wondered if she had even noticed she was crying, but soon found that it was obvious her reaction was subconscious. Maybe whatever she was hiding was being hidden from herself as well? Just what awful thing had dared to hurt his Nagisa so badly?

Karma slipped his hand over her cheek to remove the salt water for her.

His doubts had been confirmed. Though now he feared her secret may be worse than it had seemed.

"Nagisa..."

Her eyes met his, not having the time to register how close his fist was, how far back her body had been pushed, how hard his thumb pressed into her throat or how painfully the impact of the wall behind her was until she had released the breath taken before he started this.

Incidentally, her mind rushed back to what Gakushuu had done to her; being pulled back into darkness by foreign hands, being forced into a sleep when you knew you had to stay awake fearing that your life was on the risk, waking up groggily to a foreign home to be assaulted by a familiar face...it couldn't happen again.

They had been on this very road where she unfortunately had to live when it had happened, not far from her own home at all, even closer in fact than they were now.

"We've had this conversation before. Don't tell me what I already know. Answer me this time Nagisa, why are you acting this way?"

Now he was stooping so low as to threaten her? Karma knew he really was getting desperate, but he couldn't have her acting like this. The girl's eyes were pressed shut, open fear on her face that he hadn't seen in years. Since before she knew him, back when things between them were new and frightening to her. Why was she afraid of him? Was he the problem?

He loosened his grip the slightest bit. But then some of that fear transferred to him, making him release his touch all together.

"You're not pregnant are you?"

"No!" Nagisa's eyes snapped open.

The pair had never had sex without protection...

Karma's fist obstructed the wall beside her hot-temperedly. "Then what the hell is wrong with you?"

He hadn't meant to shout, but that was how it came out.

Nagisa didn't flinch though. "I'm moving away."

The redhead's mind took several moments to understand that, yet his response seemed to come to his lips naturally.

"No you're not."

"I am." Her voice was quiet, "My dad thinks I need to spend some time with my mother. He's worried about me."

"Then you show him there's nothing to be worried about."

She laughed lightly, Karma had taken hold of both of her hands, "I think it's a bit late for that now. I've already given him more than enough evidence that I don't want to be with him."

"Did you have a fight?"

Her expression was awkward and evasive, "More like I had a fight with him while he looked unsure. I told him I hated him... and forced him to accept that I'm a girl."

"Forced him how?"

She looked down guiltily, "By throwing a tantrum."

Karma would have been entertained had he not been faced with an opposing issue.

"It's backfired now, he'll barely look at me, let alone listen to why I should stay with him. I have the feeling he's kind of given up on whatever hopes he may have had for me."

"Well then," His hands curved around her face, bringing her eyes to him,"It's easy. You come and live with me."

Nagisa sighed into his embrace, "I really doubt that's possible."

"My parents like you, I like you, we have a spare room and I have the money to feed you and clothe you."

"You would never have to do that, both my parents pay support for me-"

"All the more reason to be together."

"Karma, we have to be realistic... I want to get my hopes up, I want to live in a fantasy, but the truth is I'm moving away in a few weeks and when I do, we'll be hours on a train apart. I love you.." She repeated downheartedly, "But I don't think we're going to work like this-"

"You're not breaking up with me you idiot, there's no way."

Karma kissed her, their lips melting silently and without complaint, Nagisa returning her kiss just as sadly and eagerly. Her hands found his neck, his hands found her hair and his knees brushed against hers.

The light rain painted everything a shade darker against the blindingly bright evening sun. It was only several numb, thoughtless kisses later that they were pulled apart.

"Nagisa...Karma." Her father's voice was dry with disapproval and faint disgust. They were hidden from public view, but he happened to be unfortunate enough to look a bit closer at the low teens and realise that he knew one, before realising that the other was his own child.

"Ah...s-sorry." Her pretty blue head hung, and that was all their greeting, speaking miles to Karma about their tension. He rolled his eyes.

"Mr shiota," He grinned like a cat, "I thought it was about time for me to be introduced as not just Nagisa's friend."

The man's eyes lingered on Karma rather than his own offspring, his eyebrows setting sternly as he nodded. "I think you'd better come in Karma."

He sighed eventually.

Nagisa bit her lip nervously when Karma shot her one of his scheming expressions, before turning back to follow her father over to their familiar home.

"I agree. I was planning on having a talk with you eventually."