RECOLLECTION

A/N: Set during the timeskip between ep11 and ep12.

Written for The Plight of the Little-Known Fandom Christmas Challenge. Optional Prompt: "I'll Be Home for Christmas" - Write about someone who is lonely and missing their family and friends OR Write about someone in the military.

All disclaimers apply.

Brandon looked at the calendar on a wooden desk inside his bedroom, shaking his head at the red "25" printed there. Christmas day, a day in which everybody had fun with friends and families. Harry planned to take his girlfriend to the mall, Scottie wanted to make a gingerbread house for his mother, the rest of his hitman squad had appointments here and there... Heck, even the cold and aloof Bunji had a kitty to celebrate the holiday with.

Brandon sat down on the chair before his desk, covering his closed eyes with a hand. Sometimes, people thought of him as a weirdo simply because he couldn't seem to enjoy Christmas. He wished people knew how much he wanted to love the holiday, because he used to have so much fun on that day when he was younger.

Back when he was a wee lad, he always had a stuffed turkey for the Christmas dinner with his parents. The spicy, yet savory taste... The tender texture of the meat... If only Rafael and his goons had never existed... At least he had killed that bastard with his own hands and avenged his parents in process.

He looked up at the ceiling, smiling as he recalled the Christmas celebration at the orphanage. The caregiver would always snap at - or even beat - the kids there for the smallest mistakes they made, but on Christmas day, he would make gingerbread cookies and hot chocolate for them. One had to be a good boy to get the snack, though. Brandon never had a problem with helping decorate the orphanage for the holiday, but his best friend Harry bothered him a bit. Harry always spoke ill of their caregiver in the back, but that day, he would behave like an angel in front of the old man.

After growing up and getting out of the orphanage, Brandon and Harry lived in the streets and would always celebrate Christmas day with their gang: Jolice, Nathan, and Kenny. Tears welled in Brandon's eyes as he remembered how they would sing Christmas carols at night as they enjoyed Jolice's homemade eggnog. He and Harry had only enjoyed this celebration three times because of Ladd.

But what delighted him most, before Ladd killed everybody, was Maria. Brandon still remembered how she caught him off-guard on Christmas day with a Yule log cake last year. Having prepared no gift in return, once Maria left, he kept the cake in the fridge. Then he spent the rest of the day at the town's dumping site, a good place to hide his face and find free materials for a handmade gift. Brandon only returned when he managed to turn a plastic bottle into a simple pencil holder. It wasn't the best gift for a refined lady like Maria, but nonetheless, it earned him a kiss to the cheek. His face flushed at that, but truth be told, he quite liked it.

Brandon stared at his palms, letting a lone tear trickle down his cheek. Too many had died in his hands, and those who were left behind had sworn to get back at him some day. If they knew he hungered for Maria's love as much as Maria hungered for his... No, he would never want to imagine what would happen to her.

But he had no regrets. He had made such a decision in the past, and there was no changing it. Face hardened with determination, he stood up, opened the drawer and picked up his gun. Christmas would be just another day for target practice at the shooting gallery. For Maria's sake.