Chapter 12; Plans, doubts and ruminations
"These exchanges of airstrikes between us and the Sakala have reduced our airstrength to almost nothing. We're definitely going to need the reinforcements you talked to me about." Arresh commented as he and Khagaan were making their way to the main conference room for another briefing.
"It will complicate things that's for sure, but that has sort of been our trend on this mission has it not?" Khagaan replied. "Was it all worth it, in your opinion?" She asked then.
"Hard to say. I mean, we did do a decent amount of damage to the enemy, but we received a fair amount of damage ourselves. Then again had we not fought back we might have suffered even more damage ourselves. I'm not sure we had any real choice." Arresh said. "It's never easy justifying losing lives is it?" He asked in contemplation after a few moments.
"Never." Khagaan agreed. "But those people are gone in any case and there nothing we can do to bring them back. Sadly I think we are going to lose a lot more people before this is all over."
As they arrived to the door that led to the conference room, they found Kennae already waiting for them.
"Defender Kennae? You're early, the meeting doesn't begin for another half hour." Arresh said, surprised.
"Indeed not, sir. However, there was a priority message a little while ago; an update from the Renza. Given the sensitive nature of the information I felt it necessary to deliver this matter to you in person. I've transcribed the data here." Kennae replied, handing a data slate to Khagaan.
Khagaan and Arresh gave each other a knowing look. This could only be bad news, it was the only reason Kennae might think that this information could not simply be sent to them through their personal radios.
"Very well, return to your post. Dismissed." ´Khagaan said. Kennae saluted and left as Khagaan turned her attention to the slate she had been given. "Dammit." Khagaan breathed as her eyes scanned on the words written on the slate, taking in their meaning.
"What is it? What has happened?" Arraesh asked, concern in his voice.
Khagaan took a deep breath. "It seems the Renza and its fleet ran across a force of Khaaneph, hiding in the storm like those vermin tend to do. Renza managed to win the fight that resulted, but they report heavy casualties. With the casualties they already received from earlier battles and the garrison they had to leave behind they estimate they won't be able to help us until they have had a chance to receive replacements and rebuild their fleet. Essentially they are now in the same situation as we are." She then explained.
Arresh let out a heavy sigh, leaning against the wall. "Well, that certainly throws a wrench in our plans, doesn't it?"
"Yes, I suppose it does at that. Of all the times they could have shown up, of course they had to hit us when it hurts us most. If it wasn't fact that the Khaaneph don't make alliances even amongst themselves I'd call the timing too good." Khagaan paused before continuing: "I guess our next move is to work these news into our strategy. Good thing we still have time before the meeting starts. And perhaps I should be pleased that at least some of my captains still give me accurate reports. Spares us from all kids of nonsense."
Arraes chuckled. "Thank Sajuuk for small mercies, eh?"
"Yeah." Khagaan said in amused agreement. "Come on, we have work to do." she continued. With that they both entered the conference room, there to adjust their plans to accommodate this latest turn of events. Roughly half hour later they were presenting those very plans to the rest of their command crew:
"You know the situation that we are in." Khagaan said. "Due to recent battles our fleet assets have been severely reduced and the carrier itself has sustained some structural damage, and furthermore the Renza is more or less in the same situation. We will need new ships and crews to man them. To that end we are now heading to a large debris field of artefact wreckage, where we will rebuild our assets and acquire new technologies for the upcoming fight."
"And where will the Renza be during all this?" Jiire asked from her seat.
"Since there are not enough resources for two depleted carrier fleets where we are headed, the Renza will head to a second resource location in the Garaaki highlands. I don't like it, but we don't have many options. This fight can only be won if both fleets are at peak. As soon as either carrier has finished rebuilding they are to rally with the other and join forces, as I have instructed." Khagaan replied before continuing.
"We will need fresh bodies to man the vehicles we build, as well as immediate fleet units reinforcing us to give us a fighting chance in case the enemy manages to engage us before we are finished recovering. To get these things I have contacted Harvest base, requesting crews and ships. Kennae tells me that they have already replied to our request and will be providing what we need, including new interceptors they will send out as soon as possible."
"Pardon me lady-protector, but it seems to me that there is some risk to this strategy." R'kath spoke up. "With most of our military fighting up North, Harvest base is already undermanned. These reinforcements we have called could leave them vulnerable to attack. Having coordinated reinforcements leaves a trail, a trail that enemy intelligence might find despite our efforts to hide this information. If that happens and the enemy finds the location of Harvest base while we have just left them open… well…"
"That problem will only come into play if we lose, which I certainly don't intend to do. Harvest base is also very well fortified, they won't fall easily." Khagaan countered. "But you are right, it's a risk, a risk I believe we must take if we are to have any chance of winning."
Khagaan gave a sigh as she moved to the next topic: "This brings us to the second part of this briefing. The fact is that this situation has turned into a very high risk scenario. There is a very real chance that the Coalition force will succeed in defeating both carriers of our task force in this region of engagement, leaving their path open to enter Dhaigren. Captain-defender Arraesh and I have therefore prepared a contingency strategy should the worst come to pass."
Khagaan turned to Arraesh, who began to speak:
"Before this briefing began, we made certain calculations. Based on the detours and engagements the Kapisi has undergone, it is our conclusion that the enemy carrier is likely running low on certain perishable supplies like water, food and fuel, and will be requiring resupply fairly soon. Estimating the supply situation of the Sakala is more complicated, since we do not have full knowledge of their travel path, but odds are good that they too will wish to take on additional supplies before pressing forward to the final leg of their journey. With the Coalition supply lines hundreds of kilometers away, the only way they can bring in supplies in sufficiently large numbers is to airlift them with one or more of their landers."
Arraesh pointed to a region of the map illuminated on the table, zooming in on the location: "Obviously the enemy does not have an artificial airstrip this far behind our lines. There is, however, a natural formation that might serve their needs: the Khashar plateau, here, conveniently located along the shortest path between here and the entrance to Dhaigren. Before the enemy can reach the Khashar plateau, they must pass through the Garaaki highlands and the canyon known as the Whispering Gallery, both of which are excellent defensive locations for our side to hold. Our estimations are that unless this resupply effort can take place, one or both of the enemy carriers will be unable to complete their mission. We have therefore designed our contingency strategy around these estimations."
Khagaan spoke up next:
"Now that we're back in our own territories, we have been able to link ourselves back into our communications network. Consequently I have been in communication with our kiith-Sa, explaining our current situation and outlining our upcoming strategies. He has promised us two carriers of his elite battlegroup to join us in our efforts: the K'had Sunder and K'had Retribution. If the enemy manages to defeat us and the Renza, the responsibility to hold the Whispering Gallery will fall on them. Their mission will be to destroy the enemy carriers or hold them off so they cannot reach the Khashar plateau."
Khagaan took a pause before continuing:
"Just in case we will also be stationing additional forces on the Khashar plateau itself, with several AA assets available that will destroy the enemy landers if possible. If the enemy against all odds manages to take the plateau, significant reinforcements will be made available for a massive counterattack. Additionally I have ordered the Ashinta to quit their position in the Shining flats and rally with the rest of our forces in the Dhaigren region."
Jiire gave an impressed whistle. "Well, the Faagani are screwed." she said.
"I should certainly hope so." Khagaan replied. "The forces we have committed to this fight at least are more than enough to accomplish such a task. And we don't even have to beat them all the way. All that this gauntlet of forces has to do is deplete the enemy resources to such a point that accomplishing their primary objective becomes totally unfeasible."
"Of course if things had gone as we had planned thus far, we wouldn't even be in this situation." Harkath commented sourly.
Silence fell across the room, every eye directed at Harkath, who looked every inch like he had been caught saying something inappropriate.
"True enough. The enemy has done impressively well considering what they are up against, but Sajuuk willing we'll turn this around yet." Khagaan replied finally, keeping her tone friendly so as to diffuse the situation. Another commander might have interpreted Harkath's words as questioning her judgement, but Khagaan was fairly certain that her sensors officer had not intended insubordination. He was simply expressing his feelings. Harkath seemed very relieved that she had chosen not to take offense.
Arraesh cleared his throat before speaking:
"It should go without saying that the rest of the crew should be notified of our upcoming operations on a need to know basis, particularly in relation to the rather battered state our two fleets are in currently and how difficult our situation is at the moment. The command crew needed to know the full extent of the situation so they could plan ahead. Beyond that there is no need to distract the crew with news that is likely to affect their morale in a very negative way. So use very careful judgement in who you talk about what was discussed at this briefing."
A chorus of nods followed, a serious expression on the face of everyone attending.
"Well, there is a long way to go before we reach our destination, and very little to do before that." Khagaan said next. "I suggest that each of us takes the opportunity to relax when their duties permit, clear their head for the fights to come. When we reach Beladin I wish resourcing operations and rebuilding efforts to commence immediately. Please make all the necessary preparations to ensure that this is possible. Beyond that I have no further instructions until further notice."
With the meeting now concluded people began to stand up and leave. Only Khagaan and Arraesh remained seated. "Well, that went reasonably nicely." Arraesh said after the room had cleared, then standing up to take his leave as well.
"Captain-Defender." Khagaan called after him, and he stopped.
"I was wondering… well, it occurs to me that I haven't had the opportunity to make use of the dueling ring for some time, not since this mess started. As I said, we should all take some time off when possible. I would need a dueling partner and I was wondering if you could indulge me." She asked.
Arraesh smiled. "Of course, Khagaan. I'll meet up with you when I'm able. Wouldn't want to let you skills get too rusty, eh?"
"Hey now, who are you calling rusty? I hasn't been that long." Khaagaan protested in mock annoyance.
"Then consider it a challenge to prove me wrong." Arraesh said, before turning and exiting the room.
"Oh now you've done it. Challenge accepted. Then we shall see who is rusty." Khagaan said, smirking herself.
Sometime later the two of them were facing each other in the dueling ring, a space for crew recreational activities where they could practice the more traditional methods of kharakid warfare. The space was circular and largely unadorned save for the weapon racks. The floor was covered in a shallow layer of sand so as to invoke the feel of an actual battlefield.
For this occasion Khagaan was wearing heavy robes of white that reached down below her knees, the fabric thick enough to deflect blade strikes if need be. Her chest, shoulders and her legs below the knee were protected by traditional armor made of painted black scales. On her head she had a helmet with a face plate that left only her eyes and the upper half of her nose exposed. As her weapons she was wielding a curved saber and a Seejur shield with its trio of spikes on the outer rim of the shield. Arraesh was currently dressed in the same manner as Khagaan except for the fact that his garb was in contrasting colors to hers: Black robes and white scale armor. Arraesh was wielding his favorite weapon, the Jiifara: a staff roughly as tall as he was with a blade on either end.
Arresh wielded his weapon in a quick, spinning motion, the blades impacting against Khagaan's shield in with a monotonous clack-clack-clack sound. In the ancient days the Jiifara was meant to be wielded by the Kiith's best fighters after a charge broke the enemy lines to cut down opponents in quick succession so as to finish off the scattered foe. It was a vicious weapon, particularly when wielded with the skill of one like Arraesh. It was easy to lose to such a weapon. All it took was a moment's distraction, a moment spent out of its rhythm. But, as Khagaan had learned long ago, it was also a weapon designed for specific conditions. Its danger lay in its outer edge and speed created by continuous motion. If those advantages could be negated, if the rhythm of its attack could be interrupted…
Khagaan continued to move around the room, circling her opponent, all the while parrying furiously as Arraesh continued his assault, feeling sweat gather on her brow: Parry left-up-down-center-left! Right-left-right-left-left-center! Center-center-up-down-center! On and on his attack continued, never relenting, leaving only fractions of seconds to react to each blow. The duel continued in that fashion for awhile. Then Khagaan spotted her chance as another blow was coming towards her from her left. At the moment the blade of the Jiifara connected with her shield, landing between two spikes, she made a twisting motion with her shield arm and for a moment her opponent's weapon was trapped, pinned between the spikes. It was all the advantage that she needed. Before Arraesh could free himself and recover his position, she took a quick step forward, which brought her past the easy striking range of the Jiifara. Then, with somewhat exaggerated slowness, she brought the edge of her blade to rest against the side of Arraesh's throat. A brief pause followed, before Arraesh conceded defeat, dropping his weapon and raising up his hands, a smile on his lips.
"Well, it looks like two victories for you and two for me." He said, still smiling. "I think that would be a good score to suspend our contest amicably until the next opportunity to duel, don't you think?" he then asked.
"Yes, I suppose we must. Duty calls, as always." Khagaan agreed. "Still, a welcome distraction, as always, and I look forward to the next chance we get. It's so refreshing to practice with traditional weapons every now and then. Modern weapons can be so incredibly impersonal. Just press a button and POOF, something else gets vaporized fifteen kilometers away, you and your target likely never even seeing each other. I have a hard time believing that Sajuuk would have meant warfare to be such a soulless affair. You should be able to see and hear your opponent in my opinion, so you can measure their worth and that both sides can face each other with dignity."
"True enough. Still, I wouldn't pit modern and traditional weapons against each other." Arraesh replied.
"No one in their right minds would do that." Khagaan said, laughing. "Even the most traditional-minded of us has had to face facts long ago. There was a reason why we adapted our ways of war even though our kiith loathed to do so: It was the only way to stand up to the powers our enemies had harnessed. It was the only way to not be crushed with ease." she added with a more serious tone.
"Is something wrong? You seem troubled." Khagaan asked as they were putting away their equipment.
"Just dwelling on the big fight to come. It's going to be the decisive one isn't it?" Arraesh said.
Khagaan nodded. "Yeah, it is. For us at least. Win or lose, the next fight will decide how this whole thing will go down for this crew. I would be lying if I said I wasn't nervous, but I have faith in Sajuuk. He favors us in this war, and he will grant us the victory we need in the end, I'm certain of it."
"Can we really be so certain of that?" Arraesh asked. "I mean, the Faagani have achieved one outrageous military victory after another lately. It seems implausible that they could accomplish so much in defiance of Sajuuk's will. So can we really be certain their victories are not Sajuuk's will? Perhaps Sajuuk has changed his mind and he favors them now?"
Khagaan was quiet for a long time, considering Arraesh's words. "Be careful. Such notions border on heresy." she said in a serious tone before continuing: "I cannot deny that the Coalition forces have achieved some unexpected successes lately, but I believe that this is but a test. Sajuuk is giving the enemy some victories so we can show our loyalty to him. This way we can prove that we will not turn away from him and his teachings when we are challenged. I doubt his support for the Faagani will last overlong. No, Sajuuk is with us, as he has always been. How could it be otherwise? Why would he give us commandments to live by and then turn away from the one kiith that actually continues to obey them? That would make no sense."
"And how do we know that those commandments really came from him? Where is our proof of that? Can we even prove that he was real enough to be there to give them?" Arraesh asked, almost in challenge.
A shocked silence descended between them, with Khagaan unable to believe what she had just heard. Was this how bad things had gotten? Had things truly become so dire that thoughts such as this had been able to take hold? And to hear it from the mouth of one of her best friends no less.
"That… that actually is heresy." she said, her tone one of angered warning.
"Oh come on, Khagaan! You can't tell me that you have never faced doubt! I know you too well! You're too smart not to ask questions, even if you somehow manage to find the right answers!" Arraesh exclaimed in response. After a pause to collect his thoughts, he continued: "All our lives, we have lived sure in our beliefs, sure that our way is the right one, sure that Sajuuk watches over us. Yet how do we know any of this? Sajuuk speaks to us no more than any other Kiith, all we have are the books passed to us from so long ago none of us have any chance of having witnessed the events described in those books. So how do we know that those books tell the truth? And in this war Sajuuk should have more cause than ever to interfere on behalf of his faithful. And yet he seems to be silent, no matter what course the war takes. Why?"
His eyes were wide, he was clearly as shocked by his own words as Khagaan was. And yet he could not stop himself, his thoughts spilling out of him in a cascade of words:
"Maybe it is as they say, that rather than acting directly, Sajuuk expresses his will in the actions he inspires in us who serve him, I don't know. That's the point isn't it? We can't know. We can only have faith. And yet… what if the Faagani are right? What if they've always been right and we have always been wrong? We have no proof either way. You can't stand there and tell me you have never asked these questions." he said, his voice gradually becoming almost pleading as he spoke. It was then that Khagaan understood that Arraesh was asking for her help, help to answer the questions he knew he should not ask, but that refused to leave him, depriving him from his peace of mind. He was asking for her to be the one truthspeaker he dared approach. He believed her faith was the stronger, strong enough to calm the storm within his soul where none other could. Yet he could not know what those very questioned caused to her in return.
Khagaan was quiet for a very long time. She knew that she should be angry, indignant at such a blatant display of heresy, a part of her even wanted to. It would be the simple thing to do. Yet she found herself unable to do so. Something in Arraesh's words touched something within her, reminding her of thoughts she had exiled so far from her mind that she could not even recall those thoughts with clarity, such was her conditioning to do so.
"You're right… I have had such moments of doubt… a few times in my life. Perhaps such thoughts are inevitable, I don't know." Khagaan said finally, bowing her head in a pained, shamed admission.
"But the terrible truth is that we have gone too far and done too much not to believe." She said with renewed determination, tears streaming from her eyes. "We have done terrible things, I and our kiith, all across the history we know. There has only ever been one way we have justified these things we do: our faith, our unconditional conviction that we obey the will of our creator, that the horrors we inflict serve a greater purpose. If Sajuuk turns out not to be real, then our justification is gone. Then we have been monsters the entire time. Worse, if we are wrong, then everything we know, everything we have believed, our entire history and everything we are and have been is a lie. Then everything about us has been for nothing. I would rather die a thousand painful deaths in the service of my faith and my kiith than let that ….void be our only legacy. I'll risk being deluded if the alternative is something that horrid, and I expect the same of any person that dares to claim to stand with me."
Arraesh did not respond immediately, being deep in thought, considering her words. Khagaan could not be entirely sure what effect her words had had, although Arraesh seemed somewhat less troubled than he had been a moment ago. Finally he took a deep breath to collect himself, and nodded gravely.
"Then that is how it must be. For all of us." He said, then made to leave.
"Arraesh." Khagaan called after him.
"It's best that we keep this conversation between each other. I know why you asked. I know that you are no heretic. You had a crisis of faith and you needed someone to solve it for you. I can understand that, and forgive unwise thoughts voiced during such a state of mind. Truthspeaker Deravis… won't be as understanding. He is a good man, a good Truthspeaker, but his faith is one of absolutes, a world of black and white. He has absolutely no sense for nuances in these matters. If he were to discover the subject of our conversation today, he will only react one way, and neither of us will like the results." Khagaan took a pause before continuing: "Also, preferably we will not need to discuss this subject ever again. Once was enough, hopefully for both of us."
Arraesh nodded again, this time to confirm his understanding and agreement. He then left, leaving Khagaan alone in her thoughts.
"Soon." she told herself. "Soon this will be over, one way or another, and then there will be no more doubts."
And nothing more to fear…