Chapter 14; epilogue; The heroes of Beladin

Havaath walked through the corridors of the supercarrier Hand of Sajuuk. He passed by several members of the crew. Some were carrying on as usual, still unaware of recent things that had transpired. The expressions and manner of others revealed that they already knew what the current situation was. Sooner or later the entire ship and the rest of the Kiith would know the facts as well, there was simply no way around that. He walked briskly, until he reached the personal quarters of the Kiith–Sa. After identifying himself with the guard on duty he knocked on the door, and upon hearing the voice of K'had, he entered. He found K'had sitting before the symbol of Sajuuk, likely in meditation. "Honored Kiith-Sa, I have news regarding the war. Havaath spoke to him. "It…you might not…" he then stammered, unsure how to word himself.

"Bad news I presume. Speak up then. There is no escaping Sajuuk's truths, even the unpleasant ones." K'had spoke, without turning to face Havaath.

Havaath gave a nod and a sigh to collect his thoughts. "A great battle took place in the dune sea of Beladin. It seems that the enemy carriers Kapisi and Sakala proved too much for or forces. I'm…afraid that the command carrier Ashoka and the fleet that accompanied it were lost in their entirety. Lady-Protector Khagaan…did not survive. I am extremely sorry, my Kiith-Sa.

K'had did not respond, he simply bowed his head, and remained silent.

"My lord?" Havaath asked cautiously after a long, uncomfortable silence.

"My Sajuuk accept her soul, and the souls of all the heroes of Beladin" K'had said quietly. In that moment he sounded old, like he had the weight of several thousand years on his shoulders. "Do we know how she died?" he asked next.

Havaath shook his head: "We are not certain at this point, but we suspect it was a reactor meltdown of her carrier. It would have been quick, almost instantaneous. I don't know if that helps."

"Death is still death, nothing changes that, but I am relieved that she did not suffer, and I thank you for your compassion."

A long silence followed as Havaath considered how to continue. "There are other news as well." He said finally. "It seems that the offensive against the north is faltering. There are just too many Northerners, and we had to pull away too many forces to chase the enemy expedition force."

"hmmh…dammit." K'had sighed.

"We…our commanders wish to know what we should do next?" Havaath asked. "The enemy may have captured information referring to Harvest base from the database of the Ashoka. If so the enemy is likely to take the opportunity to engage our resource operations there. I have taken the liberty to advice our defenders at this location of this possible threat. Next the enemy is likely to move to try and break through our defenses in the Garaaki highlands and the Whispering Gallery. Our forces will attempt to stop them there. Should we order our unengaged forces to join them? With our flagship and our remaining fleet we should be able to…"

"No." K'had interrupted. Havaath paused, momentarily confused.

"Khagaan has given us the location of Khar-Toba. It is there that we shall find our destiny, where this war can be ended. It is to this place that we shall go with all due haste. And if the enemy survives everything else and is bold enough to follow us, it is there that we shall vanquish them. My daughter has given us the chance we need even in her defeat, and I will not squander it. Too much is at stake." K'had explained with a stern voice that spoke of absolute commitment.

Havaath swallowed and nodded: "I shall relay your orders forward, my lord. Sajuuk's will be done."

Havaath was about to leave, but then paused as he remembered something: "There is one other matter my lord. It seems that our prisoner, Jacob S'jet has managed to escape."

"Escaped? How did he manage such a thing?" K'had asked.

"It seems that he had managed to acquire control of our systems at the base he was held without us getting wind of it. He caused a major disturbance of our security network and slipped away during the chaos. It seems whatever he did also damaged the communication systems of the base, which is why we didn't get word of this until now." Havaath explained. "At this time we are uncertain what information or equipment he might have with him." he then added.

"Does he have a vehicle?" K'had asked next.

"Not to our knowledge my lord. Had he tried to get one he would have likely been caught in the attempt." Havaath answered, shaking his head.

"Then I suspect the matter if of little significance. He was being held literally in the middle of nowhere. He will not survive long unassisted. I doubt he will be able to accomplish much with the time he has left. Still, an unfortunate incident. We might have been able to extract useful information from him given more time. Let us focus on the more immediate matter at hand."

"Very well my lord, I shall see that your orders are carried out." Havaath answered. K'had simply nodded. Sensing that his kiith-Sa still had more to say, so he stood in place, waiting.

"I lost both my daughters to this war." K'had said suddenly, sounding older than he ever had. "Khagaan at Beladin, and of Kristaan we have not heard anything since her unit disappeared, so I have to assume that she too is dead. They were the only thing left of their mother, the woman that I loved. I am alone in the world now, an old man without an heir to name my own. Such dark days. At times like this it is hard to understand Sajuuk's grand designs, even for me."

Havaath listened with an expression of sympathy, but said nothing. He had never seen his Sa like this, not once in the time he had been in his service.

"All I have left now is the path Sajuuk has set before me, the destiny that he has shown me. It is the only way to make any of this suffering worth something, the only way to set any of this right. So we must see this through, no matter the cost. Failure is not an option, not this time."

Havaath nodded severely: "I understand. We shall see it done, may Sajuuk watch over our efforts. I shall notify you the moment our fleet is ready to mobilize. It may take some time however."

"I understand. Now leave me in my thoughts. And tell the others that I do not wish to be disturbed. I require some time alone." K'had replied.

Havaath gave a quick bow and made his way out through the door. He knew why K'had wanted to be alone, even if his Sa never said it. Publically, in front of his people, he had to be strong, cold even. He had to be this way because his people looked upon him and drew their inspiration directly from him. The distress of their Kiith-Sa would become their own, to the detriment of all. Because of this weakness of any kind could not be shown, not even the kind that would normally be expected of a normal human being. It was a terrible thing, this curse of leaders that did not even allow them to be truly human.

Havaath knew that K'had had asked to be alone so he could mourn, away from prying eyes.

So he could cry.

Later, somewhere else…

Nathan S'jet sighed tiredly as he lowered another report from his hands. For several hours now he had been working, sorting out the various records recovered from the wreckage of the Ashoka, searching for bits of useful intelligence. The captain had requested a report by tomorrow morning, and Nathan had no intentions to disappoint. Already he had determined the existence of a Gaalsien military base located somewhere close by, a little more effort and he might be able to discover its precise location as well. The data was only partially available, having been destroyed or deliberately erased. What remained was for the most part heavily encrypted. Nonetheless he was certain get enough results to construct a coherent report with useable intelligence. Despite this he was not even halfway through the various records he had in front of him. Already he could guess that he would have to work through the night to get the report to the level of thoroughness he would be happy to present to the captain and in time for tomorrow. He picked up the next data slate he was to look over, then paused when he realized that this one was somewhat different from the rest. This one was smaller, and where the official data slates typically were decorated only with the Gaalsien insignia, this one had additional decorations of brass filigree lining its outer edges. It had the look of a personal data recorder, perhaps a digital diary or a notebook. Briefly Nathan considered putting the device aside for later. There really were other items of intel to go through, important ones that could contain who knows how many important pieces of information vital to the continuation of their mission. He pressed the button to replay the last recording on the device. And so a woman's voice began to speak:

"Personal log, Lady-Protector Khagaan, defense carrier Ashoka. This…this might be the last entry in this journal, depending how things go tomorrow. These last few days have been so straining, and so many casualties have been sustained that I cannot be certain of the outcome. I suppose that if all goes for the better I will delete this entry, wouldn't be first time that has happened. If all does not go well and this recording actually survives then I suppose it's probably a damn northerner listening to this, in which case good for you, I guess you finally managed to get the better of me. I could tell you that you are making a terrible mistake, one that will inevitably doom the people of this planet, but I know you would simply ignore me. I could tell you that others will find the strength to stand against you, but you must know that much already. Whatever else you are, you are not that kind of stupid. By the way if you are looking for intel on this log I'm afraid I must disappoint you, I know better than to blather sensitive information into a personal recording device. Information I cannot give, but bear with me. If you have a moment of patience to spare I might have some reminiscence to share, one warrior to another. Perhaps you will even find a kernel of wisdom that will have value to you. Let's see, what might interest you?"

There was a pause as the speaker considered how to continue. Nathan could not bring himself to shut off the recording.

"It occurs to me that tomorrow this war will be more or less over for me and my crew, either because we will have won and my kiith-Sa will have a clear path to the First City or… well you know. To know such a thing makes me wonder to wonder about what was everything for, why the war happened, what were the reasons it had to be? It occurs to me that this war was first and foremost about convictions. We had ours through our faith, and while I do not pretend to understand the logic of your judgements even on my best days, I know that you too had your own convictions, something that drove you through all this suffering. I don't think you would have been able to do what you have if you did not have something like that. I suspect that in your minds, you must be thinking that you are doing the right thing, even if I and my kiith disagree. My people have certainly challenged you enough that you cannot pretend ignorance of our warnings, even if that was how you started. You can only dismiss them, and to do that there must be something else that drives you, even if it's only arrogance. I have seen how brave you can be at your best, and I have hard time believing that simple arrogance could inspire so much. Even if arrogance lies at the heart of your action, I believe that for some of you at least there must also be something more. I suppose that on some level it is unfortunate that our convictions brought us to blows, but that was how it had to be. The things you have done, they create a risk we cannot tolerate."

Another pause followed as the speaker on the recorder considered her next words.

"I also realize that you seem to have enjoyed unexpected successes in your efforts. Oddly enough Sajuuk seems to favor your arm in this. It is difficult to understand why Sajuuk would allow this. His grand design is often too difficult to understand at times like this. At the moment the standing opinion is that Sajuuk has chosen to test us, to see if we stand by his teachings even faced with great adversity. Despite this, I find that I cannot help but wonder. Could there be more to this, some other reason why Sajuuk would favor you so? I truly cannot say. There are so many things about Sajuuks will we could never understand in a million years of meditation. So I guess you get to congratulate yourself a second time: You have caused me a crisis of faith. I only hope that whoever wins, whoever ends up being right, things will work out for our people, all of our people. I don't want the people of Kharak to die. Even you northerners cannot want that. I trust in Sajuuk to have forged the true path for us all to follow, even if that path turns out to be yours. And if it is yours, then I suppose I forgive you for your actions. All I would ask you in return would be that you forgive me for the deeds that I have done and that you take a moment, however brief it may be, to consider the possibility that my Kiith might be right, at least partially. I beg you to consider the possible consequences if my people are in the right."

Thinking that the woman speaking had finished talking, Nathan raised his finger over the button to turn off the device, only to hear her voice speak up one last time:

"Oh, and one more thing. Be careful around the Siidim. You have no love for us but even you have to admit that we at least are sincere in our convictions and intent. The Siidim have no such graces. They are the undisputed masters of pride and deceit. Their arrogance once made them think themselves better than all the rest of us. Whatever they may claim now that madness has never left them, it has merely been hidden. You may think them your allies, but I have no doubt in my mind that they will betray you the moment it becomes advantageous to them. Their kin have no honor, so there is nothing that would stay their hand. So do not turn your back on them, lest you want their knife to be sunk in it. Consider this a warning offered in good faith, one warrior to another.

I…guess it is all there is to say. May Sajuuk forge for you the righteous path to walk and illuminate it for you to follow. Goodbye."

The recording ended, leaving Nathan pondering about the significance of what had been said. Eventually he went back to work, but even then he could not fully shake the feeling of significance in the words he had heard her speak.