Chapter Six

Lost in a Memory

Lily parked the Rebel in the shadows. She dismissed the distant howl of ghosts or demons that she heard, thinking herself oddly intoxicated. She climbed up the steps to the lower level entrance of the Sorcerer's Mansion as the moon rose in the night sky. She jiggled the handle just so to get in, amble down the long marble hallway in the dark, and then collapse in exhaustion by the warm fireplace in the den. "Mom, I'm home!" she called out.

"Hi, I'm right here my dear," Maleficent said, waking in her favorite easy chair in the shadowy corner. She had fallen asleep while reading a thick book on Arthurian legend. The mansion was full of books and magical items that deserved more research, one of the reasons that Maleficent had been squatting there for months, as she'd waited for Lily to return from the quest. That, and it was luxurious, secluded, everyone left it alone. She conjured and threw a fireball towards the white marble fireplace, to get the fire going again, and looked lovingly upon her rambunctious adult daughter who lay face down on a fur rug. "Were you out with Will?"

"No mom, remember I told you, we're just friends…" She rubbed her head, mussing up her hair. "There were a whole lot of guys at the bar, they were all ripping on royalty and -as much as they ripped on their king, they were trying to get me to say I would do something about it. And they were, like, making fun of me, too."

"Sounds like one of Regina's old tactics," Maleficent growled. "Trying to provoke you so that you'll transform and do something you regret! Like that time Regina cut your hand-!"

"Mom, I'm not... like that, now. I can control it a lot better…" Lily propped herself up on her elbows to face her, though her drooping eyelids and fuzzy drunken feeling would soon give way to sleep... She looked forward to dreams of flight, and of simple dinners with Will in Camelot. They had hardly gotten together since coming back to Storybrooke. Maybe all she would have now is dreams of the two of them…

"Still, I'm going to call on Regina in the morning," Maleficent said. "She may have been an enemy -or a friend - on your quest, who knows! But even with all the amnesia going around, I should be able to get something out of her. A motive, maybe, for provoking you. Crowd-stalking you. Yes, that's a real thing Lily! Maybe she wants someone killed without having to dirty her hands…"

Lily rolled onto her back, not yet ready to theorize what was going on. She wanted to spread her arms and think about the long afternoons in this mansion with Will, her mysterious, street smart stranger, and the day that he had held her arms as they were swept up in a storm. Up into a cyclone, up into the sky, spinning about and not letting go of each other.

They had landed in the forest clearing of another land, and as they had explored, he'd told her his story.

Longing to hear his voice again, Lily dragged herself up to her room and called his cell phone. "Hey, you're up! Where are you…?"

"Just... on a supply run. I've been hanging with Robin Hood and the fellas."

"Will, tell me again… about us," she said, drunkenly.

With a warm chuckle, he began, "Once upon a time... there was a thief named Will Scarlet... clever bloke! He traveled from the Enchanted Forest to a land unknown, with his first sweetheart Anastasia, for a chance at a new life -of freedom and love." Will loved telling oral histories, to whoever would listen. He found it easier to talk about himself in this detached way.

"Will and Anastasia found themselves in the topsy turvy world of Wonderland! There in Wonderland he was still a thief but at least he spent his days and nights with Anastasia. She was tempted... by comforts, luxury, power, fame, and magic -and she saw her life with Will was going nowhere.

"Anastasia... did horrible things to gain- magical powers, and the throne! But despite all that, Will still loved her.

"Years later... she could admit to herself she wasn't happy and- she again let Will into her life. He tried to remind her that she was a good person before she was ever a powerful person -and that good person only wanted attention and love -and for her, the ends did not always justify the means. The two fell in love all over again, and got married!"

Lily listened in awe. Rarely would anyone share the tender moments of their past with her- but Will would, whenever she asked.

"But Will was still a thief, always a thief," her friend went on, "and always a rolling stone. Anastasia was always a bit of an opportunist…. And Will was always a rambler. His curious nature... got him into an adventure that was more than he bargained for- and he traveled to another, different world, this time by accident.

"The adventuring young man stumbled through a portal, and before he knew it- he got away from Wonderland, and there was no way back! He lost Anastasia, but escaped his reputation, and his minor crimes that had kind of snowballed and followed him. In this new world, he kept running into old enemies, and new ones- for it was a place of many expatriates from the Enchanted Forest.

"Will found something to remind him of Anastasia everywhere he looked. He went to the library to be alone one day, and found a book -that had all the famous stories of Wonderland! Ah, one of these stories was about the Red Queen! A merciless young woman who had married for money and power. She had come to Wonderland striving for a lucky break, like her stepsister had had when she, happened to capture the heart of a prince- 'ats Cinderella- and she got everything any girl would want. This story about Princess Cinderella, and her wayward stepsister who became the Red Queen, was a story that left out Will Scarlet.

"He knew then -that he was stuck- in a world without magic-without his wife -and he lost the will to be a good example for her, or to try and steal the riches that would provide for them. That had been his reason all along." Will paused. When he had first told this story to Lily, he'd stopped a while to look at her, and in his eyes she'd seen the reason he didn't have the energy for a relationship with her.

He continued, "Will just wandered aimlessly in the woods, where he ran into a band of thieves that he had once known -and double-crossed. Somehow he was able to make amends with all these enemies, because they were as homesick for the Enchanted Forest as he was, as desperate for a familiar face. In their loneliness they found common ground.

"Will met someone else who was lonely, who frequented the library in search of adventure and resolution but- from a safe distance. The librarian, she knew all the happy endings of every story but hers. Belle. Belle was young and beautiful- but not as young, naive, and idealistic as she used to be. She saw in Will... a broken heart, like her own -she thought they could mend them together. He did his best to make her laugh and smile -he tried to have a normal romance. What they liked about each other was just the feeling of something new.

"To his horror, Will found out that Belle was still married- to an exile who wielded magic and power- even in a world without magic! This dark- hearted older man manipulated people into letting him back into the protected little town of Storybrooke. Belle had banished him, her own husband, to save the world from his increasing appetite for power, for spells and skills and treasures that could only be accumulated in this hidden little place called Storybrooke. But, despite her brave expulsion of the Dark One, he found a way back in, a way to trick her into giving him his power back.

"The Dark One returned... to mend his ailing heart, not with a relationship -but with a tremendous effort to rewrite history. With magic, he thought he could give himself, and every dark soul, a fresh start. A chance to switch lives with good people and totally forget the unfair past. So Belle's husband didn't try to win her back, but instead wished her and Will all the best. He knew it would not last between them anyway."

Lily had memorized this long story of his, couldn't help it, because no one had ever spoken to her so eloquently, intelligently and frankly. She wished she could articulate her own story as well. "Then what?" she encouraged him.

"Of course there were other forces at work in this strange town," he said, "some of them standing in the Dark One's way. He had always struggled to... travel through time and across realms. He needed help to rewrite his story, and cast himself as the noble bearer of light magic. But the old sorcerer had no experience with light magic -he had only been grasping at straws, ideas of its more ordinary forms: true love, selfless sacrifice, and also, the deepest waters of the subconscious...that flow between all the realms. The 'world without magic' still had the slightest traces of magic left in objects imbued with memories, and in other hidden corners. So the Dark One had to activate them, in Storybrooke.

"First, the Dark One captured the Author of magical stories, and gained his eager participation in his plan to turn the world upside down. Then he tried to steal a pen of power from other powerful people in Storybrooke, those who were constantly on guard against the darkness. He cornered Will Scarlet and roughed up the thief, enlisting his stealthy skills. He needed more than someone who could break into the mayor's office and snatch a locked box. He needed... a traveler's advice.

"Will was to tell about how he hopped realms- but he could not describe his recent journey from Wonderland to this land -it was an accident, it was all a blur. He had no details for the Dark One- and so he was lifted off his feet, cast down into the gutter, bleeding and useless. Awaiting the end... of this tangent of his story.

"The Author had waited on, eagerly, for inspiration, for a deliciously wicked and modern story, and no one in this town of enchanted expatriates had better inspiration than The Dark One. He had lived hundreds of years, he had died and been to the underworld and back, and now his misdeeds were catching up to him.

"Rumpelstiltskin lay on the floor of his store- panting, his left arm twitching and his heart beating irregularly behind his clenched hands. His last hope for his ailing, darkened heart was to start over, with complete, obliviating collective amnesia and a carefully set up life story. So The Author spun the Dark One's tale of heroes turned to villains and vice versa, binding everyone who had been born in the Enchanted Forest to a twisted storybook.

"Trapped in this storybook, the bravest souls were now living injured, defensive lives, and the criminals and misanthropes of their little world were now righteous, verging on victory."

Lily remembered following Will on winding trails, as they scouted around Camelot, and he had recited this tale. She appreciated his explanation of the time they were swept up in the Heroes and Villains realm of story.

"The Light One rode about the woods and countryside saving people from ogres! A knight, with no allegiance but to good!

"The witchy queen, Regina, lived here as a thieving nomad.

"The wicked witch, Zelena, was confident and beautiful, dressing up for her wedding day with her loyal fiancé, Robin Hood, who was a reformed bandit.

"All of this, meanwhile… The Light One came home to Belle and their baby each night. and yet... he still was not completely...content. He felt, deep down, that there was more to his life. A terrible, repressed part, having something to do with his first son.

"Secretly, everyone felt that way and couldn't put their finger on it. In this reality, Will was rich! and reunited with Anastasia- for this storybook drew characters from different realms! -but, somethin' still worried him, in moments of silence. He and Anastasia were... wealthy courtiers from far away, benefactors who benevolently granted wishes and doled out monies to poor hopefuls, wherever they went. They rode around in a modest carriage and Anastasia charmed crowds with her warm smile and generosity. They handed out treasures from their foreign and almost forgotten land, that Will guarded from thieves and pirates.

" ...Only slightly, did she suspect, like a fleeting shadow in the wee waking hours, that -she had once been an evil Queen who manipulated the wishes granted by genies, instead of herself making people's wishes come true. Only vaguely, did Will suspect that there was, in his past, a long stretch of time when he- when Lord and Lady Scarlet were separated. The faint memories started to resurface…

"They started to resurface on the day that... one member of their community returned -the only one who hadn't been born in the Enchanted Forest and who didn't have a role in this new story. Henry. The next author!

"When the people were waking up to the falseness of their lives - more so the current heroes than the current villains who clung to their sense of loss and resentment. Henry battled the Author of Heroes and Villains, young as he was. That Author, Isaac, fought for the status quo, and his successor, Henry, the boy with the heart of the truest believer, fought for the world he alone could remember. A world in which almost everyone was -family, and the darkest souls were still growing closer to redemption. In the recesses of their minds, the people grew more uneasy-their past lives were dawning on them.

"On the day that Lily the fearsome knight was about to confront evil queen Snow White about her prison guard assignment, the day that Lord and Lady Scarlet were to attend the wedding of Robin Hood and the wicked witch, the day that Grumpy, head of the royal guard of dwarves, plotted to steal away the lovely nymph named Nova from her coven of chaste forest folk, the day that Princess Cinderella threatened to torture the townsfolk in a desperate search for her baby's unknown father, who had left only a shoe behind, this was the day of the final battle for this world. On this day the characters of this story all heard the whispers they'd been hearing from their dreams: that their world was not real.

"And then, the battle! No one watched -as the epic battle between surface-level solutions and authenticity was fought. No one saw the next Author, and his mothers from a past life, face down the so-called Light One and the Author of twisted tales.

"The Light One struck down the child author and his mother from a past life, the bandit Regina who had never had a chance to become- the evil Queen. But, with the blood of that unlikely savior, Henry was able to pen the line that wrapped up this story, and the ordinary magic of Regina's sacrifice proved as powerful as any magical ink. 'And the work of Isaac was undone,' Henry wrote, with that ink of blood.

"Then, In a flash, Will had remembered how he had traveled between realms before. When he'd stumbled from Wonderland to Storybrooke, someone had tampered with the storybook that held together his reality, and ripped out the pages that concerned him. He had been removed from Wonderland 's story and from Anastasia -then dropped in a place where stories are read, not lived.

"In a flash, Will was now torn from this Heroes and Villains story, from beautiful blonde Lady Anastasia Scarlet's side and dropped back in Storybrooke."

Lily and Will paused to wrap their heads around it all. "And here we are," Lily said dryly. Will had thought his rambling on would have had her snoring by now- but she was intently listening.

Will described his life after Heroes and Villains: "The young thief...blinked in the sun

… the sun filtered through a dusty window in the public library... as Will and Belle came to consciousness. They were sitting together behind a reference desk, holding hands. It was too painful then. They had just lived out alternate lives with their true loves, and then all those events were undone. Will had to know if these events were also erased forever. He took off towards another library -the magical keep of great import, hidden in the ultimate sorcerer's mansion on the hill. Belle understood. She left for the pawnshop she'd been tending in Mr. Gold's absence - looking for the man she'd missed all along.

"Mr. Gold lay there on the floor, clutching his heart. His plan was foiled, his end was near. The power to change stories was wrested from the mischievous Isaac by the noble Henry, who had always been prophesied to be Gold's undoing. Now after hundreds of years of dark magic, his personality was dying and the darkness was taking over. He didn't want Belle to watch. As a last ditch effort to save him, and save the town from The Dark One who would be unhinged from Mr. Gold's personality, Belle got the help of the ultimate sorcerer's apprentice. The apprentice, seeing the Dark One for once in a vulnerable state, used a most powerful wand he had inherited from The Sorcerer to draw the Dark One magic out of him.

"It had never been done before - but then, no other Dark One had lived so long as to reach this crisis, and have their cruelties catch up with them. The apprentice was exhausted by the effort of wielding this wand to do what had never been done: draw out the Dark magic and leave a heart clean, pure, new, with a blank slate.

"And… the apprentice would lose his life to this effort of saving Mr. Gold, and then resisting becoming the new Dark One himself.

"The darkness, meanwhile, was not done, and it slithered swiftly through the sky in search of a host. It greedily would take Regina, one of the saviors who had been trying to overcome her tendency towards evil- instead it took the other savior, Emma. Emma threw herself in front of Regina as if it were her turn to make a sacrifice.

"See, Emma had not yet discovered her own propensity for evil because most of it was cast out of her long ago, before she was even born. If the Darkness had not thrust itself upon Emma, it would have gone on killing those with light magic- and next sought the girl whose soul was darkened back then: Lily. The woman named Lily was the sacrifice made for Emma's goodness, as a babe. This time Emma was sucked out of the world and into the Dark One cavern in the Enchanted Forest, taking the Darkness with her; last time the apprentice had made such a transfer, Lily had been sucked out of the Enchanted Forest, taking the darkest capacities of one unborn soul with her."

"How do you know all this?" Lily finally interrupted her friend with a question.

"Belle filled me in on some of it," Will had said quietly, "not long ago. We still talk. At least, I'd like to think we do. And some of this, I've pieced together through careful study of the Storybooks…"

Lily grew a little uncomfortable as her deeply thoughtful friend turned his focus to her. Usually he was curt and foul mouthed, but when he dived into a story, it was like he was artfully writing their memoirs. Lily wasn't ready for her own memoir.

"In Storybrooke, Maine," Will said, as the hour grew later and later, "Lily was just starting to get a new lease on life, after 29 hard years in the world without magic, without parents, without love, bearing the burden of two souls' capacity for selfishness and evil. She spent a lot of time at the bar. But one evening, she was drawn to the imposing, abandoned mansion on the hill at the edge of town, drawn to the false panel in the wall that led to a secret passage to a library full of powerful storybooks.

"After such a trip as-experiencing an alternate universe in which she was a knight, who could turn into a dragon, and then awaking from that story as though from a dream-Lily wanted answers. Just like Will, the wandering vagabond who thought he would squat there a while and stare up at the stacks. Blank books and half-written books and experimental writing in some, each of these storybooks a possible world of what could be, what could have been.

"Will of course wanted to commiserate with Belle, but really he envied her, because she was taking care of her true love. Though comatose, he was a blank page. Where was Will's blank page, for a new beginning with Anastasia? Somewhere she was missing him, somewhere she was trying to live a good life, even while having power and her red royal position and- well, her first husband dead, her second husband disappeared.

"In his loneliness, Will found that he could confide in Lily... and pore over these mysterious volumes of the Sorcerer with her. Every story had the balance of good and evil, and some variation of transformation or resurrection. Amid these cosmic themes people's lives were tossed about like bubbles on the waves - both Lily and Will were used in other people's stories, and it hadn't worked out for them.

"Lily sought a clue to who her dragon father was- Will sought love. He had once found a rough draft of Isaac's that had never come to be, an unfinished scrap of a story about the evil Queen abandoning her royal life to be set up with a new soul mate, and finding that soul connection with Robin Hood, a prince of thieves. Where was such a possibility for the Red Queen and her homeless, rambling husband? He found legends packed away in the dusty corners of the library that mentioned dragons of destiny, but where was the truth about Lily's father and her shape shifting mother, Maleficent?

"Will told his fellow researcher that this was the grand collection of a great sorcerer... who had prophecies and visions of dragons. This sorcerer saw the future of two warring kingdoms, Camelot and the heathen highlands, as a battle between a red dragon and a white dragon. They had this discussion after a long afternoon of reading, as Lily poured herself some whiskey. Maybe this sorcerer would know about the dragon she sought…"

"That brings us to the day we went to Camelot, Will," Lily said into the receiver that was covered with drool. She smiled. "I've been trying to piece together what's real from fairy tales for years. Ever since I was a teenager. Then when I found out I was really part of a fairy tale... well, let's just find Merlin and make sense of it all."

"Aye, maybe we did find Merlin… maybe we still have yet to find him," Will acknowledged. After having this discussion about how to find Merlin, over six weeks ago, the two of them had stepped outside, felt the winds of a cyclone tearing through the green ominous sky, and held each other, barely able to hunker down and not be blown away. It was definitely something summoned by magic. They had looked in each other's eyes and understood that a magical cyclone would take them to a world that had magic and this was as good a chance as any -they took their chances and ran towards the storm, letting themselves get swept up in a raging tornado. The tornado had lifted cars and buildings off the ground, carrying Granny's diner, a dog, two bikes, and two thieves hanging on to each other for dear life, up into the churning clouds and into a twisting portal to another realm. Lily and Will got where they wanted to be, quite by accident. They later set up camp in the Enchanted Forest, using wide fallen pine boughs and rock piles. They got their bearings atop a ridge, and looked out at a suspiciously shining castle.

Lily remembered seeing Camelot and then... then, just Emma's death. The quest had been taken from her mind - from everyone's. She was farther than ever from making sense of it all… Even with concern knit into her brow, she drifted to sleep.

On the other side of town, Belle Gold tried to get some rest in the large wooden house that had been hers and her husband's, in the large wooden bed that had been hers and his, kept up by memories that were hers and his. Rumpelstiltskin had convinced her, after hours of back and forth between them, to stay here alone for a while. She hadn't been able to get him to leave the shop, and she worried that now he never would. In a world with no more Dark One, Rumpel found reasons to be isolated and afraid.

A sliding sound - from somewhere on the first floor! Belle held her breath. Someone was here. Her body tensed and she forced it to move slowly toward her bedroom door. She hoped it was Rumpel- and that he'd changed his mind-that he was home to recuperate and make things right again! But if it wasn't him, she had to do something! No magic was handy to protect her, and she doubted the local sheriff was in a good state of mind to help her. Belle picked up a dusty cane of ebony to swing at any intruder, then tiptoed through the house. She looked around a corner, down the stairs- a window in the front hall was open! There was a man- trying to climb in the window!

She mustered her courage and flipped on the light.

"Will!"

"Belle!" He blinked in the light. "I'm so sorry, I didn't want to scare you! Just trying to leave as quiet as I could!"

"Just leaving? Oh, and with what?" She squinted -he had a full backpack on, and one leg in, one leg out. Apparently he was back to his thieving ways!

"Just some things I'll need. See I been checking in here since we got back from Camelot-"

"What? The place was locked up, security system was on! And this house is protected by old magic!" Belle came down the stairs, with cane still raised.

"Yeah… but remember you gave me the key? So I could come over any time?" Will got down from the window and held up a simple key ring with a brassy key on it she recognized. "And… I assume you don't want Mr. Gold to ever know that," he said. "So how 'bout he doesn't find out, and you forget I was here? Since I… didn't manage to slip out without waking ya."

Belle hadn't been asleep, but she was tired enough that her brain was foggy. "We… got back from Camelot…?"

"You forgot I ever went on that journey to Camelot, didn't you?" Will asked, cocking his head to the side.

"Huh- when did-? I'm not sure I ever knew, Will! My memories…" she looked down and rubbed her eyes. "There was a search party for Emma. If others came, who weren't in that search party in Granny's Diner… I just don't know."

He shrugged his indifference, and made for the front door. "If it's all the same to you, I'll just let myself out the door then."

"You could've asked! " She said, with an exasperated sigh. "You could have asked me, if you needed a place to stay or- if you needed money, or anything!"

"You were a little busy with him-and, I thought, it would be upsetting for you to see me, in the midst of everything. But if we're still- friends? After this..." He nodded towards the open window. "Well, maybe I'll ask. Next time I... need a book." He smirked as he looked back at her.

She let her guard down and smiled. "Still friends. And I'll still be tending the library. So... yes, I'd like that, ah... you know where to find me."

It was awkward between them. He left. Belle checked all the window fittings and locks, armed the security system again... and reflected on her relationship with Will for the first time in -it felt like a long time. He was scrubby on the outside, flippant and a little difficult at first... but inside he was a brilliant aspiring orator. She missed his tales from his many travels, his thoughtful inquiries about the lives of everyone else in town, and the way he would practice telling a story to her over and over, never writing it down. He had said that he valued memorizing things so that they would be attached to a person, and not just lifeless words on a page detached from intent and interpretation. Better for words to be attached to a person than a person attached to, and controlled by, words. Belle still found that idea of his especially poignant, having lived as a storybook dictated. She sat up in the dark master bedroom alone, thinking of the all- too -brief relationships in her life. First promised to Gaston, then to Rumpelstiltskin, then dating Will. There had hardly been a time in her adult life when she considered herself single- and now, it felt so strange to face a future in which she might actually be alone.