CHAPTER 3

Harry awoke to warm rays of sunlight streaming in through the enchanted window in Severus's bed chamber, along with even warmer fingers dancing lightly across his chest. Winter had made way for Spring and with it came a heady dose of hope and hormones. Harry smiled and moaned softly, letting Severus know he was awake. Severus's fingers stilled, questioning.

"Don't stop on my account," Harry said around a yawn. "It's quite a nice way to wake up."

"I wouldn't know," a deep voice said next to him, fingers resuming their exploration.

Harry turned his eyes to meet the man's gaze. "We could change that, you know."

Severus looked uncertain and Harry caught Severus's hand in his, bringing it to his lips and kissing the man's fingertips.

"There's no hurry, Severus."

"If you want… I understand…" Severus stammered.

Harry lowered Severus's hand back to Harry's chest and reached out to put his fingers against Severus's lips. "Shhh… there's no rush. Honest. I am just happy to be here with you."

"Would you let me know if you weren't?" Severus asked.

"I let you know when I didn't like how you hogged all the covers, didn't I?" Harry teased.

"I wouldn't call pushing me out of bed 'letting me know' exactly."

Harry laughed. "I don't know, I thought it did the trick quite nicely. You haven't hogged the covers since."

Severus scowled then looked throughtful. "I wouldn't mind if you… touched me more," Severus admitted.

Harry grinned and reached out, running his fingers along the planes of Severus's face. Severus leaned into his touch. He'd been summoned four more times since that night. He'd returned, bruised and bloodied, and often suffering the after effects of the Cruciatus curse, but he hadn't been raped again since that night. That dubious 'honor' had fallen to other Death Eaters who had displeased their master.

Still, each time Severus returned, Harry found himself needing to make up ground with the man. Not that he minded so much. It hurt more to see Severus lose a piece of himself every time he had to bow down to that madman. Harry pushed those thoughts aside and rolled closer to Severus.

"I love the way your skin feels under my fingers," Harry murmured. He'd learned that Severus seemed more able to handle being touched if Harry talked while he did so. "And I love the way you lean into my touch."

Severus closed his eyes and murmured in approval.

Harry scooted a little closer. He slid his fingers into Severus's hair, which the man seemed to like most of all. "Your hair is softer than I ever imagined it would be. Nice and silky. I love sliding it between my fingers," Harry said, demonstrating what he meant.

"I like yours, too," Severus replied, raising a hand to card through Harry's hair as well.

Harry continued to stroke Severus's long black tresses as he said, "I like the feel of your breath on my lips. It's so warm and comforting."

Severus's eyes snapped open, as if unaware that Harry was so close.

"All right?" Harry asked, continuing to gently stroke the man's hair.

Severus swallowed, then nodded.

"Want me to back off?" Harry asked.

"No," Severus breathed. "Just give me a minute."

Harry closed his eyes and focused on the feel of Severus's hair sliding like water through his fingers, cool and soothing.

And then, oh… soft lips were touching his, tentatively exploring, and Harry opened his eyes, smiling. "You feel very nice," he whispered against Severus's lips, happy to see the nervousness ease in Severus's gaze. "I like the way you kiss me."

Harry eased onto his back, letting Severus's lips chase his. He wanted Severus to feel in control, wanted to let the man explore at his leisure.

And, much to Harry's surprise, Severus did.

It wasn't until that summer, after Severus had explored most of Harry's body with fingers and lips and tongue, that he allowed Harry to return the favor. Harry yearned to give Severus even half the pleasure the other man gave him, but Severus was skittish and far more comfortable pleasuring Harry than accepting pleasure himself.

Harry was careful to hide his frustration at this, not wanting to drive the man away or make him feel guilty. It was just that, as on the night Harry was determined to kiss Severus, Harry knew that Severus would love it. If only Severus would give Harry a chance.

That chance came, surprisingly, after a Death Eater meeting.

Harry was waiting up in bed, reading a book, when Severus stomped through the bedroom and into the bathroom, tearing off his robe and mask as he went.

"Severus?" Harry asked, getting up from bed.

"I'm fine," Severus called over his shoulder. "I just need to shower."

Harry bit back the questions he really wanted to ask: Are you injured? Are you really all right?

Severus stepped out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist, his hair still wet.

"Show me," Severus demanded, his eyes blazing.

Harry sat up and shifted to the edge of the bed, his feet now on the floor, not sure what Severus was on about.

"Show me," Severus said again, and this time, he let the towel fall from his hips to pool on the floor at his feet.

"Sev?" Harry questioned.

Severus stepped forward, practically shoving his groin in Harry's face. His fists were clenched at his sides, his eyes screwed shut. "Touch me. Suck me. Show me."

Harry caught his breath. He wanted to say, Are you sure?, but he knew that would be insulting to the man. Instead, he said, "Open your eyes. I want you to watch me." I want you to know it's me.

Severus gaze flashed to Harry's.

Harry lifted his hand and trailed his fingers along the front of Severus's hip. Severus wasn't hard yet but, at Harry's touch, his member twitched. Harry smiled and placed a soft kiss next to Severus's navel. Then he trailed several more kisses down Severus's abdomen, tracing the indentations of his hipbones with fingers and lips and tongue.

Severus's breath hitched and his legs began to shake. The man reached out to hold onto one of the columns of the four-poster bed.

"Do you want to lie down?" Harry asked.

"No," Severus breathed. "Not yet."

Harry nodded and returned to his exploration. Severus was trembling, likely more with nerves than with need. But Harry planned to change that.

Gently he lifted Severus's half-erect member and guided it to his lips. He blew gently on it, before placing soft kisses along its length. As it grew, Harry traced the velvety texture with his tongue and drew soft fingers down the man's sides.

Severus's body was still rigid, tense, unsure.

Harry reached out and grasped Severus's free hand, placing it against his chest, over his heart, before slowly taking the tip of Severus's burgeoning erection into the warm wetness of his mouth.

Severus's breath caught but still the man held back, as if holding onto control would keep him safe.

"Relax, love, I won't hurt you," Harry breathed against Severus's hardening flesh. "I promise."

Severus let out a long breath as Harry drew his tongue along the length of Severus's erection.

Harry hummed his appreciation as he tasted Severus's spicy, warm flesh, reveling in its texture and scent, smiling as he elicited tiny sounds of pleasure from the anxious man.

"I love the way you taste," Harry murmured, sliding a hand down to cup Severus's bollocks. Severus stiffened at that, so Harry let go, sliding his hand to the man's thighs and stroking him there instead until he relaxed again.

Harry wrapped his hand around the base and guided Severus deep into his mouth. Severus let his head fall back as he bit back a moan, thrilling Harry to no end. Harry felt his own erection straining against his pants, but he ignored it.

Slowly, Harry dipped his tongue into Severus's slit, causing Severus to buck in surprise. Harry grinned, and did it again, tasting precum and moaning right along with Severus. Then Harry swirled his tongue around Severus's foreskin, sucking softly.

Harry felt the hand over his heart contract, nails digging mindlessly into Harry's chest. Harry hummed and slid Severus deeper into his mouth, sucking and savoring with every stroke of his tongue, his lips, his mouth.

"Harry…" Severus breathed, and this time, the word held wonder and need and trust.

Harry added another hand to Severus's shaft, encasing it fully as he slid Severus in and out, creating a rhythm that had Harry himself thrusting into thin air.

"Oh… Yes… Harry… YES!" Severus's hand slid from Harry's chest to his hair, fingers threaded into Harry's locks, holding on tight.

Encouraged, Harry took him deeper still, first sliding one hand over to Severus's hip, and then the other, steadying the man as Harry took Severus's whole length deep into his mouth all at once.

The hand wrapped in Harry's hair clenched convulsively as Severus's hips began to thrust. "Harry… I… I'm going to… I can't…"

Harry squeezed Severus's hips in reassurance, taking him as deep as he could, sucking harder, relishing the rocking of the man's hips.

Harry moaned against Severus's flesh, pulling Severus's hips toward him, encouraging him with sound and touch and acceptance, wanting more than anything for Severus to trust him, to let go.

And then Severus cried out, his body jerking spastically before he bucked once, twice, three times, his release finally bursting free.

Harry swallowed around his smile, taking every last drop from the man he loved, wringing every last sound of pleasure from the man's lips. He let Severus go soft in his mouth as Harry stroked Severus's sides and hips and legs, reassurance and adoration in every touch.

Finally, Harry let Severus's spent member fall between them as he wrapped his arms around Severus's waist and held him tight, and tighter still.

Severus still stood, one hand grasping the bedpost, the other on Harry's shoulder. His head was bowed, his legs shook, and his breathing was ragged.

Harry looked up, hoping that Severus could see the love shining in Harry's eyes for him. "Want to lie down?" Harry asked.

Severus nodded, side-stepped Harry, and collapsed face-down onto the bed, his legs hanging over the edge.

Harry chuckled as he crawled up alongside Severus and lay beside him, running his fingers along the dewy skin of older wizard's back.

When Severus finally turned his head to look at Harry, he looked chagrined. "Sorry," he mumbled, "I didn't mean to lose control like that."

"I'm glad you did," Harry said honestly. "I loved every minute of it." Harry brought his fingers to Severus's lips and traced them as he said, "You taste exquisite."

Severus looked startled. "I do?"

"You do," Harry assured him. He'd have offered to kiss Severus, to let Severus taste himself on Harry's tongue, but Harry didn't want to push it.

Harry slid a lock of hair out of Severus's eyes and said, sincerely, "Thank you."

Severus looked taken aback. "For what?"

"For letting me show you. I've wanted to for a long time, you know."

Severus glanced away.

Harry took him by the chin, pulling his gaze back. "Not for me, silly," he chided. "I wanted to do it for you. I wanted you to feel how amazing it can be."

"I… yes, I…" Severus stammered.

"Shhh," Harry said, placing his lips against Severus's and kissing gently, chastely. "You don't need to say anything. Not to me." Then he pulled Severus into his arms and held him, held him as tightly as Severus was suddenly holding on to him.

Harry placed a kiss atop Severus's head, holding him in his arms until Severus drifted off to sleep. Gently, Harry tugged the man up higher on the bed, fitting a pillow beneath his head and pulling the blankets and covers up over them both before drifting to sleep beside the man, a smile on Harry's lips.