... Uh, hello? I'm still surprised that I have stalkers... So uh, thanks?
Urahara's mouth worked but no sound came out.
"Uh... um... How old are you, Yuzu-chan?"
Karin kicks the soccer ball into Urahara's head.
"You really are a pedo! Back off, freak!"
"B- But I was just asking! How am I supposed to know what gifts to tell Jinta to get her if I don't know how old she is?"
"Get this through your head, you creepy bastard! NOBODY'S DATING YUZU!"
Yuzu has tuned out the argument, as she does most arguments in the Kurosaki household.
"Here's your hat, Urahara-san."
"Oh, thank you. So-?"
"I'm 10, Urahara-san."
"... Oh thank god..."
"What was that you pervert?!"
"N- NOTHING!!"
Urahara felt relief flood him. Pregnant looks only worked if the target had gone through puberty at some point. Not even Karin's kicks to his head could dim the warm feeli-
"YEEOWWWW!!"
"K- Karin-chan. That was really low..."
"The pervert deserved it!"
"Uh, I think we should get going..."
"Wait!"
Jinta quickly fills a bag to overflowing with a lot more snacks than 500 yen would ever buy.
"Here ya go! Uh, come back again! But not you."
"Like hell I'd ever come by a dump like this."
"IT'S NOT A DUMP!"
Urahara was very glad his gaze would still let him have kids. And he wondered how long it would be before he could mo-
"Tenshu! Are you alright?"
"Ah... I'm ok, Tessai. I'm just laying down..."
"From your posture and painful expression, I deduce that your manly gonads have been injured! I have just the thing to cure you of this pain!"
And to those of you who thought I'd make Yuzu or Karin pregnant, WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU?! Good God!