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Violet eyes. Dark dreams.

-

It felt nice, leaning against his chest. His arm was gently wrapped around her small shoulders in a comforting gesture. He was so warm, so cosy... Yes. She felt safe there, safe enough to let herself slowly nod off to sleep, without fear of nightmares or danger. She hadn't been this much at ease since... But no, she didn't want to think about that. All she wanted was to be able to pretend that had never happened, even if it was just for now. Being able to snuggle up to the man who would become her father helped. A small, earnest smile crept to her lips as her face relaxed, and her hold on Luna-P lessened. It wasn't long before she was dreaming of Family, Unicorns and Gardens... Of Happiness.

"Is she asleep?"

Mamoru nodded gently at his wife's question. He didn't want to disturb the child. It was strange how right it felt to let the little girl snuggle up against him like that. He felt filled with both a feeling of warmth and great protectiveness. Which made sense really. He couldn't help but feel protective of a girl in distress. It was still as much the case for Mamoru Chiba as it was for Prince Endymion in his former life.

"Like a little angel." he replied, brushing his fingers through the child's bleached bangs.

"One wouldn't think she could be such a demon when awake!" said Usagi pointedly. She put away the dish she had been drying (the meal had been less of a disaster then usual), before coming over to the living area to sit at Mamoru's other side.

"Tch, look who's talking," went her prince. She was quick to puff up in protest, until, that is, she realized he was smirking and taunting her. She swatted back at him.

"You should have seen what the little terror did to Ami's hair..."

Dring! Alert bells ringing! Usagi was going to start her umpteenth spiel about 'Chibi-Usa's evil deeds.' Quick, think of a distraction wonder boy.

"Ah, yes. How are Ami and the others doing? I'm afraid Motoki didn't have much time to inform me this morning."

Mamoru recalled Motoki's desperate attempts to keep up with the flow of customers. His wife's flowers were sure popular this time of year. The young man had had to flee before the temporary florist could even think of enrolling him as help. Not that he minded helping his pal out, but he had other urgent matters to attend to, including his own work, Chibi-Usagi's protection, and helping the Shittenou fight the new evil that was taking over the city of Tokyo.

And now Mamoru was crossing fingers in the hope that his distraction would work on his overly enthusiastic young wife. He didn't enjoy the tales of his little protégée's blunders as much as Usagi did in telling them. He knew that it wasn't because she was mean. One only needed to glimpse the admiring smiles that would sneak up in between the young woman's overly exaggerated scowls to understand that most of her irritation towards the girl was out of admiration and a little envy. Yes, Usagi was envious of Chibi-Usagi. The little girl had a focus and a toughness about her that Usagi never had. The fact that they seemed to share so much in common aside from that only accentuated this difference more. Although why Usagi felt the need to get worked up over this was beyond Mamoru's comprehension.

Aha! The distraction seemed to work, and Mamoru was spared a retelling of Little Usagi's 'sharp reaction' to Ami's pointing out her albinism by name.

"Makoto called," explained Usagi, while brushing back one of her pigtails.
"She only had a small bump on the head apparently, so they let her out fine, on the condition she paced herself. Minako's back on her feet and teasing her manager and bodyguards as good as ever."

The retired form of Sailor Moon had put up two fingers and was now pointing at a third, enumerating her friends' fortunes one at a time.
"Rei needs to stay in a little longer till they're confident her cold isn't going to develop into something serious. She's got some nasty burns that may take some time to heal, but I'm told she's already got most of her spunk back. As for Ami..."

Here, at her fourth digit, her eyes saddened.
"She's got something nasty to her leg that means she'll probably be unable to walk for the next three or four weeks. They'll be keeping her there at least another week, because it's most convenient for her and her mother. That and they're worried she might have damaged her "lungs" I think. She also has some burns, but they aren't as bad as Rei's so it should be fine. She doesn't remember what it is she's been doing these past three weeks but she doesn't seem to be fretting over it as much as the first time. At least that's what Makoto said."

And as if the worried look on her face hadn't been enough, Usagi put up her thumb and continued, a bitter tone in her voice.
"And while all the others have been hurt trying to protect me, here I am with barely a scratch, good old and useless me."

Mamoru wrapped his free arm around her shoulders in a reassuring squeeze, saying in a low yet definite voice that no, she wasn't useless. She merely shook her head and pulled out of her pocket the watch he'd bought her, way back before they had vanquished Queen Beryl and Metalia.

He knew it was the drawing of the Moon she was looking at. Of all her crew, she was the only one who had yet to transform once more. She felt just as useless as when Kuroki Mio had tried to sabotage their wedding by sending in clowns to steal everyone's energy. It had been a one-time-only stroke of luck that had enabled her to become Sailor Moon again, for the duration of that one battle. Even if it did happen again, as the others seemed to prove it could, what was there to prevent the tragedy of their teenage years from repeating itself? Having the strength of the silver crystal back for the length of one battle was okay, but having it at one's side on a near permanent basis...?
No wonder Usagi was feeling uneasy. She didn't like the idea of her friends' pain anymore than she liked that of sitting back and watching them fight, unable to assist them herself.

All Mamoru could do was pull her into a tighter embrace and hope he could protect her from her worries that way. It wasn't long before Usagi senior was also snuggled against his side, slowly drifting into sleep, as he too nodded off, his head leaning upon her own.

Kunzite and the others could manage without him for another hour or so anyway.

-

Dear Diary,

In the end, I didn't get to go to Professor Tomoe's stargazing session this week. Which is a pity since I had been looking forward to it.
The professor has been too busy in the past month to host it, and I can't help but have the feeling that there is something too fascinating to miss happening up there of late. The 'astronomy tower' at his home is one of the best places to observe the skies from within Tokyo, mostly thanks to the high-performance telescope he has there.

I called him to apologize for my absence. I had fallen asleep on the couch while heating some leftovers in the microwave. I hoped to have a quick meal and shower before heading out again, but obviously I must have been exhausted, since by the time I woke up, I was already over an hour late. I decided to forgo the outing altogether. The professor was very understanding though. He said he and the other astronomists and physicists there regretted my absence, but would be glad to fill me in on what I had missed tomorrow at work. I thanked him, even though I know their observations won't have the same impact on me as a direct view of the stars. Maybe I should try to book a session at the observatory in the mountains this week end... It can't hurt.

The Professor also thanked me for visiting his daughter for him this lunch time, despite my busy schedule. He knows how crucial the beginnings of a project can be, and has shown considerable interest in my theory and approach. Apparently he is researching something along similar lines. He got a surprise breakthrough in getting some crucial funding for his own project, which is the only reason why he asked of me such a favour.

Tomoe's daughter is at the hospital, getting some treatment for a rare respiratory disorder. She's been there for over a week, and the doctors wish to keep her in for another two. It must be rather difficult for the professor and her. I learnt from his colleagues that his wife died in a tragic accident some seven years ago, leaving him alone to care for her. Professor Tomoe hardly ever mentions her, or his private life. Everyone assumes it's because he wants to concentrate on his research. Therefore it was only normal for me to be surprised when he not only informed me of the situation, but asked if I could go and visit her in his stead.

"I've been visiting her every day during the lunch break since she's been in," he said. "However I suddenly have a meeting with the funds board today which I cannot miss or postpone. Hotaru will be disappointed that I cannot make it, but I would rather have her know than let her worry. Do understand that if circumstances were otherwise, I wouldn't dream of imposing such a chore on you, but..."
Those might not be his exact words, but the gist of it is there. I would have been hard pushed to refuse. I had gained a good head start on my project by then, and the opportunity to meet Tomoe's daughter was something my inquisitive mind could not say no to.

The hospital visit in itself was fairly strange.

I went there after having grabbed a bite to eat, rushing a little because I still wished to get a fair amount of work done in the afternoon. The Professor had told me Hotaru's room number, but I still managed to get lost in the maze that is that building. I bumped into someone while backtracking at what was probably a quick jog. It was a young woman, only a couple of years younger than me. For some reason I felt as though I should have known who she was. I could see pictures in my mind of her smiling, dancing, talking... But surely I would have remembered the name of someone as tall as she? I don't know that many Japanese women who top me in height after all. For a moment I thought I saw a flash of recognition flash in her eyes too, but I must have been mistaken, as she denied having met me before.

Awkward. It had been a while since I last had an impression of that kind. I think it is what my grandmother used to call my "spider sense tingling".
... She had lovely earrings though. The woman I mean, not grandmother. I think they were made from real rose buds. If ever I see her again, I'll be sure to inquire about them.

My encounter with Tomoe Hotaru was also quite peculiar.

When I got to her room, the first thing that struck me was how quiet it was. Most of the other rooms I had passed along the way had been filled with the chattering of sick children's friends and family, sometimes the blaring noise of a television. Even the quieter ones had at least had some sort of rustling or beeping noise.
Tomoe's room had been dead quiet. I was so relieved when I heard the sigh of the occupant dispel that disturbing impression.

Then I had another surprise. Stepping nervously into the room, trying hard not to show my unusual uneasiness, I came upon a teenage girl. For some reason I had expected the Professor's daughter to be as young as ten, a chubby face showing a similar cheery disposition to her father's.

Hotaru was nothing of the sort.

She looked as old as thirteen, although a glance at her health sheet (which some nurse must have carelessly left by her bedside) told me she was fourteen and a half. She seemed pretty small for her age... However, with her dark black hair falling like a velvet curtain around her face, her pale skin and unmoving gaze, she gave off the impression of a wisdom beyond her years.

She ignored my presence for what seemed like ages, staring at a book she had open on her lap, never moving to turn the page. It appeared to be some poem, even if I wasn't able to read it from where I stood. Why was she staring at it so? What was it about? If only I could remember the title of the book, maybe I could find it myself...
But no, I recall now. When at last I spoke her name in question, afraid of disturbing her yet unwilling to stand in silence much longer, she had closed the book. It had been an old book, the cover so worn and damaged that the title was no longer readable. I didn't have the sense to ask her about it then, and even if I had, would she have answered me honestly?

As if the closing of the book had suddenly freed her to pay attention to the world that surrounded her, she rose her head to acknowledge me, her tired face looking up at mine, as she asked her question in a soft voice.
"...Yes?"

I introduced myself, told her I was a colleague of her father's and explained that he had sent me, and why.

"He usually sends that other woman..." She remarked. The way she frowned, I could tell she didn't like that person, although I had no idea who it could be. She seemed to remember her manners though, and gave me a small, apologetic smile.

"It's nice to meet you, miss Meioh," she said. A hesitation, puzzled expression and then a question followed...
"I'm sorry if I met you before and forgot. You seem familiar, yet..."

I was surprised. I was sure that we hadn't met before, yet she and I both seemed to share a sense of having done so. I have often enough had the impression of knowing someone the moment I set eyes on them, but she was the first person to openly share that feeling. I smiled, not wanting to worry her, merely saying that no, I didn't think we had met.
"I see..." was all she replied.

A few minutes of silence passed, but for some reason I no longer felt ill at ease. I sat on the edge of her bed, smiling up at her. Slowly I could see a smile sneak its way onto her face. After another moment, a giggle made itself heard. I grinned before letting my own laugh come forth.
When at last her giggles subsided, she gave me a sad yet sweet smile.

"You're a strange person." It was said with good humour.
"I don't mind being strange," I answered. "Most scientists are, I hear." I winked.

She sighed. And then another strange thing happened. She frowned, but differently from before. Her eyes seemed to flicker for a second and I felt a chill run down my spine.
Maybe I had better change the subject.

"What's the food like here?" I asked, sitting on my hands. I was aware that teenagers were susceptible to mood swings, but this seemed a bit too sudden.

"It's terrible." Even her voice sounded icy. Maybe she had felt offended, thinking I had called her father strange? Now that I thought about it, Professor Tomoe did have some troubles a couple of years ago, with many scientists unwilling to work with him due to some sort of strange behaviour.

I was at a loss. I couldn't find anything to say. I was tempted to leave and return to my research, but I didn't want to leave this child, no, this teenager on such a bad note.

"What do you think of Time Travel, miss Meioh?" Hotaru asked me. She was smirking in a manner that looked both mocking and unnatural.

What I think of time travel? What a question to ask... My research and that of Professor Tomoe both deal with the possibility of extra-terrestrial life forms. It has nothing to do with the troubles of Space Time continuum.

How did she know that Time Travel...

--:--

Mamoru awoke with a start when he felt his mobile phone vibrate in his shirt pocket. Silently blessing whatever instinct had him put it in silent mode, he sat up gently to check whether or not the other two had awakened.
He need not have worried. Usagi was snoring away in her lovably cute fashion. As for Chibi Usagi, she had curled up against the arm of the sofa, her arms wrapped around her ball. He was free to stand up and see who was calling him.

"Hello? Chiba speaking."

"Master!"
It was Zoicite. Mamoru stood immediately alert. Zoicite wouldn't have called him master unless it had to do with the new villains in town, and needed to be dealt with urgently.

After a few questions and answers, such as where was Kunzite (who was usually the one to update him on the situation,) what had happened, where, who and what, Mamoru decided to give out his orders. "Okay, Zoicite. I'm coming over, I'll contact Jadeite. You try and get Kunzite to come around. Tell Nephrite to stand guard at the hospital, in case the enemy wants to trick us into leaving it unguarded."

As he said this, Mamoru was already grabbing his tuxedo suit from its niche under the counter separating the lounge from the kitchen area. With a small popping noise, he un-flattened his top hat and put it on the work surface as he slipped out of his casual attire. He was already in his tuxedo trousers and shirt when he heard Zoicite's response.

"Who'll protect the girls? Don't worry... Luna should be able to protect them long enough to call for Jupiter or Venus's help, but I think they'll be fine."

So long as the situation wasn't a distraction to hit them here... But Mamoru was willing to take the chance that if distraction there was, it was to target the hospital. He hung up and swiftly buttoned up his shirt.

Thinking of Luna, the moon cat had been acting a bit strange of late. She'd been spending a lot of the time sulking in corners, or on the roof, staring at the moon and the stars. Or what little one could see of the latter at least. Whenever Artemis was mentioned she'd either become grumpy or turn somewhat sarcastic.

Luna being sarcastic was a fairly scary sight, especially in her human form.

Mamoru suspected it had something to do with Chibi-Usa's Luna-P. One of Luna's most recurring complaints had been about it.
"What does the P stand for anyway? Pig? I think not..."
There was also the touchy subject of her human form. She didn't grow, always remaining the same eight year old child, much to some of her most frequent 'encounters' wonder. (Especially Usagi's brother.) Oh, she'd boast about how nifty it was being able to get away with things and ask for sweets, without the worry of growing up, only that of when she'd next sneeze... But Mamoru couldn't help but notice at times how she grow quiet after that, turning inwards with a melancholic sigh.

That wasn't all though. Mamoru could feel it. He might have known the moon cat the least, but he was certain something else was bothering her. He just had no idea what.

He sighed as he slipped on his cape, reaching out for his hat and putting it on his head with a flourish. The mask didn't take long to follow either.

"Why did you pick it up?" came a small voice.

Mamoru jumped, before turning to see Chibi-Usa, looking at him through sleep heavy eyes.

"What?" he asked.

"The Hat..." A yawn prevented her from finishing her sentence straight away. "You usually just make it fly onto your head."

"Really now?" The young man tried to hide his unease, as the little girl hummed confirmation.
"I guess I just felt like picking it up," he said, reaching over to ruffle her hair and cover the little girl with a blanket.
"Why don't you go back to sleep? Uncle Mamoru has something to take care of now..."

The girl's faint nod as she drifted back into the land of nod was enough to reassure him. He pulled another small blanket off the nearby sofa and covered his still sleeping wife as well.

After that he left the flat in silence, climbing to the roof to have a quick word with Luna before racing off to find his generals.
He couldn't help but wonder, as he travelled, about the nature of Chibi-Usa's remark...

--:--

Time travel has always been a secret dream of mine. For many reasons, really.

As a child I'd daydream a lot about what life might have been like twenty years, two hundred years, even two millennia ago. I'd wonder about when the important discoveries had been made, how the great heroes of our past might have seen themselves. Sometimes I'd even try and imagine what the future would be like. My favourite imaginings would be of buildings made of transparent crystal, acting like prisms and refracting light through all the shades of the rainbow. It wouldn't be a perfect world, of course... There's nothing interesting in a world without some form of danger at bay.

When I grew a little older, another secret dream would add itself to these. If I could time travel, maybe I could go back in time and find my father. Maybe I could stop terrible things from happening if I saw them coming long enough in advance... Maybe I could have saved my grandmother from that storm.
But I soon discarded that idea. What would be the point in changing the past, since it was what made the present and the future? However much it hurts, the past shouldn't be discarded.

When I acquired my degree, it had been very tempting to specialize in the study of space time continuum... I hadn't mentioned the idea to anyone, save perhaps my boyfriend at the time, but I had kept my ears and eyes open, eager to hear of any theory or discovery that would encourage me in that direction. However I had found a deeper calling in the study of the skies. The thought of life out there had been just as thrilling...

But that didn't tell me why the child had felt the urge to ask me about it.

"I..." It had been so long since I had tried to vocalize any thoughts on the subject. "I think it's a fascinating idea."
What else could I say? How could I expect a fourteen year old to relate to theories she'd probably never heard of, to understand the equations that excited me so when I found some new paper on the subject.

"Just an idea, eh?" Hotaru's expression seemed to have reverted to something less disturbing. I noticed another flash of violet in her eyes, as she continued, her voice less acid, less cold. "I wonder what it would feel like, to travel through time."

I could only give her a sad smile, having wondered that myself without ever finding a satisfying answer.
"Only time can tell."
Which also reminded me that my lunch hour was pretty much over and I should start heading back to the laboratory. Even if I did have a head start, time was still precious.

"Anything you wish me to tell your father?" I asked as I stood up. "I'm afraid I can't chat much longer."

A warm smile came across her face, making her look more human and alive then she had during the whole conversation.
"Just tell him not to worry too much about me. I'm fine."

"Will do!" I said, saluting as one of my friends used to during high school.
The lack of response as I headed to the door made me stop though, and look back at her.
I could see her reaching for her throat, her face turning purple as she opened her mouth without any sound coming out. I rushed to her side, anxious to see whether or not she was alright... But of course she wasn't, I hit the buzzer for a nurse with my hand as I caught her shoulder.

It was strange how she looked up at me then. There she was, having a fit, looking at me as though it were only normal that she couldn't even hear her own breaths, her eyes dark and withdrawn. I had a vision then. A vision that came back in my dreams when I slept just now. I left when the nurse and doctor arrived, assuring me that they knew what to do, that the fit would be over any minute... But in my vision it was her who asked me to leave, to be 'careful.'

I sighed as I put my pen down, taking a break from my writing. I like keeping a diary. It's one of the best ways I've found to organize my thoughts, to take stock of my day, or days, as sometimes happens when I haven't had the time to write.

But those dreams...

I shook my head, took a sip of my hot drink, and set back to writing.

I got a letter from Michiru today. Or more specifically a post card. She's having an exhibition of new paintings apparently, and would love if I could meet up with her there.

I grinned as I looked at the card once more. Michiru had always been gifted in painting, but her inspiration for the medium was always so fickle that she had chosen to focus on music instead. It was nice to know she had found some time to paint these last few months. If the card was anything to go by, the exhibition promised to be stunning.
It would also be nice to catch up on each others lives again. We write to each other often enough, but we haven't really gotten together since the end of high school.

She was in my dreams too.

... I didn't have the courage to write the dreams down though. I signed and dated my entry, before heading over to sit at my window. I didn't feel like sewing tonight. The dreams were still too vivid in my memory.

Dreams of an adult Hotaru fighting off a dark mountain of shadow, telling me to go away before I got hurt... Dreams of silence, darkness, mourning ... Dreams in which Michiru would see right through me, would hide in depths I could not reach. Dreams of crystal kingdoms laid to ruin, of a planet void of life... of a light coming to claim my loneliness.

I hugged my knees and thought of my past.

-

tbc...

Thanks to Astarael for Beta-reading!