Never Ending by Betty Bokor
Sam/Daniel. Vala has a secret and Sam has promised to help her. This story tags Unending and is kind to Vala and all the other characters in general.
Spoilers: All seasons, including 10 to the end.
Disclaimer: The Stargate original characters belong to MGM/Showtime, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Film Corp. This was written strictly for the purpose of entertainment. No attempt at copyright infringement has been made.

Never Ending

Chapter 4

Sam started crying as soon as she heard him. She was definitely overwhelmed by the whole idea of being in love with her best friend and her best friend being in love with her. She knew it could have been worse; one of the two may have not had the same feelings, but it was still too much. "Would you stay here with me for a while?" She finally asked.

Daniel nodded and kept holding her until she calmed down. Then he brought her some comfortable clothes to go to bed and he let her go to sleep. He spent the whole night trying to figure out how they would work up this new facet of their relationship. Nevertheless, the following days did not match any of his thoughts. Sam constantly kept him at a safe distance and, excluding a few chaste kisses, he did not feel their relationship had changed at all. She insisted in keeping it all a secret, except from General Landry, whom she asked for sanction.

The first few weeks, Daniel understood. The revelation of her feelings had hit Sam hard and she needed time to get used to it, but, after a month, he started resenting her attitude. Because of the great love he had for her, he decided not to push her and, to avoid himself more suffering, he slowly started to drift away. He carefully planned his activities so that he would not have to share much time with her, unless necessary for their jobs, and he found new and improved excuses to be unavailable after work. Sam soon caught up and decided to face the problem. She walked to his office, determined to get him to agree to meet outside the mountain to discuss their relationship. She was surprised when he closed the door of the office, sat behind his desk, and declared it was as easy to do it right then, right there.

Sam was not ready for that and, when pressed to talk, she finally told Daniel that she thought it all had been a mistake and that she wanted to end it. She begged him to remain her friend and to go back to the easy relationship they had before Vala's intervention. She did not know what to expect, but she surely did not count on Daniel simply saying, "Okay."

He was clearly not going to discuss it any further, so she left his office with a thank you. She rapidly picked up her stuff and left the base for home. As soon as she was out of the base, she started crying. She did not understand how Daniel could be so indifferent about what had just happened. It reminded her of Pete the day she had broken off their engagement. They had not fought for her or gotten mad or begged for her to change her mind. They had both agreed with her as if they already knew what she was going to say and were simply expecting it. That was when it hit her. They were probably expecting it and they had already worked themselves up to accept it.

She could see how Pete would have imagined that she was not going to end up marrying him, but Daniel? She finally got home and started packing a small bag. She needed some time out and she also had to tie some loose ends. She finished packing, grabbed her cell phone, and called General Landry on her way out. Her superior officer was very understanding and allowed her to take the next day off.

Meanwhile, Daniel went about the rest of the day as if nothing had happened. He had been expecting to get to that point one way or another, so he had been preparing to put all his feelings away in some dark corner of his soul as he had done so many times before. It was not the first time he had lost someone he loved and, this time, at least Sam was still alive. He was relieved that it had been Sam herself who had brought it up and he made a firm resolution not to let it ruin his friendship with her. It would take a while to mend all the damage that had already been made, but with Sam soon going to Atlantis for a couple of months, he would have time to start healing.

When Sam did not show up for work the next day, he gathered all his strength and left a friendly message of concern on her answering machine. He worried about her, but figured she needed time off to reflect and recover. To avoid thinking of Sam as much as possible, he stayed working at the base until very late. When he finally made it home, well after midnight, he was surprised to see the lights on in his living room. He figured that if an intruder had been waiting for him, as it had happened many times since he joined the Program, he would not have turned the lights on. He cautiously approached one of the windows, trying to distinguish any out of place shape inside the room. When he realized that Sam was sitting in one of his armchairs, he was utterly surprised. He walked to the front door and opened it without too much noise. He immediately heard Sam's voice.

"Daniel?" she called from her seat.

"Yes, Sam, it's me," he answered as he walked toward the room where she was waiting for him.

As soon as she saw him come in she said, "I'm sorry for not calling. I didn't know you'd work late or had something else after work. I let myself in with the key you gave me and, then, I must have fallen asleep waiting for you." She stood up and started picking up her coat and her handbag. "We can talk later, maybe tomorrow. I'm sorry," she added.

Daniel was still coming out of his surprise, but reacted just in time to stop her. "No, you don't have to leave. I had to work late, but we can talk now. I would have come earlier if I knew you were expecting me."

Sam looked doubtful for a minute. Finally she said, "Okay."

Daniel suggested going to the kitchen because he had not had dinner. He thought he would be preoccupied fixing something and that way we would avoid looking directly at Sam, as she said whatever it was that she needed to say.

She sat at the kitchen table and watched as Daniel got ingredients from the fridge and pantry and started cooking some kind of pasta. He was silent and she did not know how to start.

"I flew to Washington last night," she finally admitted.

Daniel stilled for a moment. Not in a million years would he have thought of that. She had gone to see Jack? Was that what she was trying to say? "Washington?" he asked, with genuine surprise in his voice.

"Yes. You said you had to make peace with Sha're and Vala. I have long ago gotten over Jonas and Pete, but I needed to see the General."

"The General, Sam? You flew to Washington to check on Jack's intentions toward a relationship with you and you still call him the General?"

His tone of voice had been almost unrecognizable to Sam. She could not decide if it was hurt or angry or a mix of both. "I wasn't checking on anything," she said softly. She was certain that Daniel had the right to feel hurt or very angry at how she had treated him in the last weeks. She knew the whole mess was her fault and that she would have to work hard to bring things back to, at least, where they were before their declarations of love.

Daniel turned to look at his food on the stove and she thought he scowled unconscientiously as he did.

"Do you want to hear this or would you like me to go? She asked softly.

Daniel did not turn to look at her, but answered in an even tone of voice, "No, go ahead. Tell me whatever it is that you came to tell me."

Sam stood and walked toward him until she was standing right behind him. He did not acknowledge her presence, and, though she badly wanted to reach out to him and touch him, she kept her hands by her side and began to talk. "I went there because I needed closure. You said there was something there between you and Vala, even if it never went beyond that blurry state, and I felt that the same happened between Jack and me. We never said anything; we never went beyond the looks and the smiles, but-"

"Would you have liked it to happen?" Daniel asked as he turned to put his food on the table, still not looking at her.

"I don't think it would have worked, Daniel. We all care too much about each other; Jack, you, even Teal'c, are too close to me. When I told you that I loved you, I wasn't lying, but I love them both, too."

"So, what you're saying is that if any of us reciprocated that feeling, it would have worked, but you'd preferred it to be Jack. That's why you had to check up on him first." He said it fast and he did not let her interrupt him. Then he sat down and waited for an answer he was certain to already know.

Sam sat facing him and simply said, "No."

"No?"

"No, Daniel. No. No matter how much I love all of you, it wouldn't have worked with anyone but you."

He sighed and shook his head in disbelief. It had clearly not worked between them.

Sam continued. "What I had to do in Washington was clear the air. I had to put things on the table and talk them out. I had to tell Jack what I felt all these years and especially how he made me feel. What I realized is that he made me feel that way because what we all went through together was completely out of the ordinary and he knew how to lead us through it. I love him for that. And I will always love the quiet strength of Teal'c, his courage, his loyalty, no matter what his past was. I talked to Jack and I also talked to Teal'c before coming here. I thanked them for what they mean in my life."

"So, you're going to thank me, too? You don't have to thank me, Sam. I did what I could when I could. I failed so many times… but I was trying. You don't owe me anything. We all did what we had to do for the team."

"There's more, Daniel. Let me say the rest."

"Fine. I'm not stopping you," he said and started eating his meal.

Sam clearly heard the pain in his voice this time. He was not mad at her; not even a little angry. He was just hurt. "You know what the problem is, Daniel? The physical part of this is. The physical attraction. There's none where Teal'c is concerned. He likes Ishta's type and I'm not anything like that. Then, there's Jack, and, yes, I have to admit it, I've felt attracted to him, but I can't get in a relationship with him because of that. I won't sit by the pond fishing for the rest of my life. It was cute for a weekend, with all of you there, but I want something different from life and he doesn't."

Daniel shrugged and kept eating, without looking at her. She would have felt offended by any one else doing that, but she knew how Daniel was and that he was only doing this to avoid showing his emotions.

"Then, Vala got in the middle and I realized how deep my feelings were for you. How much I wanted you to be with me and not with her. However, that's not enough either. Just because I'm jealous of her doesn't mean that I can make you happy. These last weeks I've struggled with that and I've been terrified that once we got together, it wouldn't be satisfying for either of us. I'm not sure that we're compatible that way. You're brilliant, caring, compassionate, and you're also gorgeous, but I'm don't know if you're my type or if I'm yours."

Daniel had stopped eating. He was stunned. He was not sure he knew even what she was talking about.

"You seem to favor petite women, dark haired ones-"

"You mean like Ke'ra or Sarah?" he asked sarcastically.

"No, I mean like Vala, and Sha're had dark hair-"

"Sha're was not petite."

She was about to interrupt again when he stopped her. "Sam, Sam. Listen to me. I would have never told you I was in love with you if I didn't feel attracted to you. It all comes together for me. I don't love you like a sister. I love you like a woman and I have no doubt that we could be happy, even physically, but if you don't feel it, you don't feel it. That's not something you can force. I understand it and if you don't see the chemistry between us, there's nothing else to discuss. I'm not mad, I'm not offended, and I told you before at the office, I will do my best to be your friend." He sighed and stood up. He picked up his plate and threw the rest of the food in the trashcan and started putting the dishes in the dishwasher.

Sam had remained seated, but she suddenly stood up and walked toward him. She stood very close to him and when he straightened up from the dishwasher, she took his face in her hands and kissed him. First, Daniel thought he ought to stop her, then he asked himself why not, and finally he kissed her back with all the passion he had been restraining during their weeks together. When they came apart to breath, Sam looked surprised.

"That was better than I thought it'd be," she said softly.

The comment did not make Daniel happy. "Great," he said with heavy sarcasm and walked toward the sink to pick up more dishes.

"No, Daniel, I mean it. Nobody had ever kissed me that way before."

He was about to say something like "No wonder you don't expect much of a relationship", but he put his hurt and irritation aside and opted for his second alternative. He put down the dishes and walked back to Sam. He looked intensely at her and then he kissed her again. In a few minutes they were making love on the kitchen counter. He had made love in crazy places before, but this was the one he would have never imagined. Sam seemed so enthralled by whatever he was doing, that he was not willing to risk moving to any other room and losing momentum. He had this one chance to prove to her that they had chemistry and that he could make her happy, even physically, as she had put it.

Sam's thoughts were not far behind. She had suddenly realized that all the other qualities she loved in Daniel were enough to make her happy, because he would have looked for and found a way to satisfy her physically if he had to, but he did not even need to try. He was definitely the most caring and most passionate lover she had ever had, in spite of the kitchen counter. Now, she wanted to show him that she could make him happy, too.

When they finally stopped and took a moment to breath again, Sam put her arms around Daniel's neck and brought him back closer to her. She had trouble bringing her breathing back to normal, but she wanted to say something to him. "You've proven me wrong once again, Dr. Jackson," she smiled. "I don't know why I was putting so much stock on this, but you've surely made it a moot point. I'm sorry if I seemed shallow. You're so good at everything you do, that I had no doubts about you, just about how we would work out together."

"So, you don't have any more doubts?" he whispered.

"None whatsoever," she answered with a smile.

"Would you mind if we move on to a less harsh surface?" he joked.

She shook her head playfully and smiled again. Daniel thought that if the last half hour was an indication of times to come, everything would be all right. As long as he had the patience to help Sam surmount her doubts about their relationship, they would ultimately make it. Besides, this kind of happiness was not something he had been used to in the past. It was worth any effort to maintain.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Any comments? Please, take a minute and give your opinion. It is very important for me to know what the readers think in order to decide how to continue a story or write the next one, or, if there is no interest, stop posting it here.