a/n: okay, so originally this chapter was going to be much longer, but I decided to split it in two. Which means the next chapter is already partially written. Of course, many of you are probably aghast at the fact that I'm updating this now, when I haven't for almost a complete YEAR. Surprises happen every day, people :)
Well, you may have thought that New Year's Eve would've been Severus's worst day that year, but if you did, you need to keep in mind that things could always get worse. Severus thought this highly likely, judging from an experienced stance. He was right.
A little after Christmas vaca, as Severus saw it written loads of times (though he didn't think 'vaca' was good for student vocab.) something bad happened. That bad thing was that Severus was being a ref. The worse-than-that-previously-mentioned-bad-thing was that Severus had put himself in this folly.
The aforementioned folly had taken place on a fine and unsuspecting Tuesday morn, whilst Severus was crunching on a dry piece of toast. Dumbledore had suggested that he kindly sit next to him at breakfast. Severus sensed something fishy coming, but couldn't do much about it.
"Severus, I would like to make a request which I am sure you will have no trouble carrying out," said Dumbledore. Severus knew that meant "Do whatever I want or I'll lower your pay to that of a peasant", so he put his toast down and stared at that man, trying to look eager. It didn't work.
"Now, as I'm sure you know, the big game for our new Gryffindor seeker is coming up."
Severus expected more to come, but when Dumbledore kept staring at him expectantly he decided it was time for an icebreaker.
"Gryffindor versus who?" he asked uninterestedly.
"Hufflepuff."
Severus choked on his toast and had to get emergency care. Unfortunately, Dumbledore followed him to the hospital wing where he pretended to be concerned before falling into a moment of silence. Severus knew he was getting ready to pop the big one. He wished he would hurry up before he blacked out.
"Severus, I would like you to act as referee for this next match." Dumbledore then blabbered on about how he wanted to make sure Potter-who-takes-too-much-maintenance didn't get jinxed again, and how he himself would not likely make it to the game because of some lousy lunch date.
Severus started to say that he didn't feel comfortable with this plan, and that he already knew who was causing the trouble anyway, so maybe these steps weren't completely necessary.
"Who was it Severus?" Dumbledore asked, with a twinkle in his eye.
"Quirrell," Severus said excitedly, then lowered his voice to a whisper. "I have sufficient reason to believe that he is after the Sorcerer's stone behind your back---
"Hmm, do you think so, Severus?" Dumbledore asked, not believing him. "Oops, look at the time! I have to go confer with Minerva, she'll be wondering where I am. Well, I had better go. Have fun with that refereeing job, it'll do you a world of good. Thank you for complying, Severus. I knew I could count on you."
And with that, he left the hospital wing in a rush of merriment.
"Here, let me take your temperature," Madame Pomfrey said randomly. Severus felt like an indentured servant.
That night, Severus revised his lesson plan to include approximately 3 lbs. of homework every night, which the exception of 6 lbs. on Friday. Then he took some Advil and had cold porridge for dinner.
Severus lay in bed for two hours, making snort sounds and rolling over repeatedly. Finally, he got up and made a caricature of Dumbledore to vent his frustration, and ended up falling asleep at his desk.