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Thank you to my beta Trish! You are awesome!
AN: This chapter alternates between past and present. Parts in italics are flashbacks as it clearly states. The present sections are in Josh's POV. Please send feedback! And Enjoy!
Chapter 7
---Two days after the election---
Josh's POV
It has been two days since the election and we are still running at full force, which of course I love. The problem is Donna thought there would be some sort of break before we plunged ahead with the transition. When she found out there wouldn't be any break, she refused to slow down. I wanted her to take time off until the baby came, but she said I was not to be left to "my own devices" – her words. I wonder what she thinks I did before she came along.
However, Donna is Donna and when she puts her mind to something she doesn't step back. Speaking of backs, hers has been bothering her all day, more so as usual. She thinks I don't notice, but I can see how it is affecting her concentration. I asked her to take the day off but she thinks there is too much to do, which is true. There is a lot to do. Even I did not realize there would be this much craziness involved this early in the transition.
I look up, and outside my office, I can see Donna typing away at her desk. She pauses suddenly and there is this look of pain on her face, but as quick as it comes, it leaves her features and she continues with her work. If I didn't know any better, I would think she was having contractions. Nevertheless, it's too early for that and she would tell me if she was. Right? After all, I am her coach and I'm pretty sure that is something you would tell your coach.
She is filing now. She has a huge stack of files in her hands. She pauses again, but I can't see her face. Then I watch as the files drop to the floor and she doubles over in what I can only guess is pain. I am by her side within seconds.
"It's time, isn't it?"
"No, no Josh it's too early."
"Then what's going on Donna?" I am trying to keep my voice even but really, I am starting to get scared. She's right; it's too early. She's not due until January.
"It's probably just Braxton-Hicks, a false alarm."
No sooner are those words out of her mouth when her eyes widen and she looks down. I follow her eyes and notice the wet spot on the floor. Oh god…
"Donna?"
"Okay, we should go to the hospital now. Let me cancel your afternoon." She says it as if nothing just happened. She walks over to her desk and I follow.
"Donna? What just happened?"
"My water broke." She states matter-of-factly.
"Donna?"
"Josh?"
"Donna?! We need to go."
"I need to fix your schedule for the day first."
I look at her as if she has lost her mind and then I see Kathy walking by. "Kathy, I need you to cancel my day and let Sam, CJ, Toby, Leo, everyone know that Donna went into labor and I took her to the hospital."
"But Josh-" Donna starts to protest, but I cut her off with a look.
"Now!"
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---Immediately after chapter 6---
After Donna left to go home for the evening, Josh made his way to Toby's office. He thought CJ was probably going to be mad that she wasn't his first stop, but Josh felt that maybe Toby would better understand the situation Josh was in. He didn't know why, but he though that CJ might not be able to get past the press reaction to see the human side of the situation.
Josh knocked on the door waiting for Toby to respond. He walked into the office closing the door behind him. He made his way over to the visitor's chair and sat, not quite knowing how to start.
After a few moments of silence, Toby looked up from the report he was reading. "Do you need something Josh?"
"Umm, yeah. There's something I need to talk to you about and I realize I should probably be talking to CJ, but I thought you might be able to talk to her, so she doesn't freak out."
"What did you do?"
"What? I didn't do anything."
"Josh I don't have time for guessing games. What's going on?"
Josh took a deep breath before beginning his explanation. "Well, Donna asked me to do her a favor tonight and she's my friend so I agreed. She was worried and I'll admit I'm a little worried too about the press reaction, but she's my friend and I am going to do this for her."
"When do the Lamaze classes start?"
Josh was a little thrown. He didn't pretend to understand Toby, but he didn't think Toby knew about stuff like this.
"A couple of weeks. Her doctor wants her to start early."
"Is everything okay?"
"Yeah, it should be. She is just taking extra precautions."
"Well, it's going to be tricky but I'll talk to CJ, and we'll figure this out. You just be there for her. She needs a good friend right now."
Josh smiled at Toby. He knew that Toby would understand that this was not about the campaign or their jobs. This was about friendship. Even though CJ was a good friend, she sometimes had problems looking at situations without the press secretary-colored glasses.
"Thanks Toby. I owe you one." With that, Josh left Toby to his report and decided to take an early night. Maybe he would visit a friend.
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---Present Day---
"Josh, you need to calm down."
"No, I need to know how you are so calm."
"Everything is going to be okay. I just know it." I sneak a look at her as I drive at a relatively high speed. Maybe I should calm down. When I see her face, there is this beautiful smile. She has a wonderful smile. It was one of the first things I noticed that day she hired herself.
I nod slightly, turning back to the road, I slow down to make sure we get there in one piece.
I was surprised that once we got to the hospital I didn't have to fill anything out. Donna informed me that she had pre-registered. The nurse took us to a room and told us Donna's doctor would be along shortly…
"Well, Donna. It looks like this baby is ready to come out."
Donna tries to smile through the contraction that is currently taking place. She's squeezing my hand rather hard. "It feels like it." I respond.
The doctor chuckles, "let's see how far along you are Donna."
"Everything's going to be okay right? I mean it's kind of early." Even with Donna's assurance, I can't help but ask the doctor.
"Well, it's earlier than I would like considering the history of this pregnancy. But it's not too early. And it looks like everything is progressing along nicely. I'll be back in a little bit. Relax, there's a while to go."
I let out the breath I had been holding.
"Calm down Josh. It's going to be okay. I told you that."
"Donna, how can you be so sure?"
She just looks at me with those big, beautiful, blue eyes. "You promised me it would be."
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---First Lamaze class- Two and a half months ago---
"So, that was Lamaze class. It was rather interesting don't you think? I probably could have lived without the video." Josh commented while sitting behind Donna, watching the other couples make their way out of the room. He grew a little concerned when Donna didn't make any motion to move or respond.
"Donna?"
"I can't."
"You can't what? Do you need help getting up? You're not that big yet."
"I can't."
"Well let me help you." Josh said still thinking she was talking about getting up. When he moved around in front of her, he realized it had nothing to do with that. Sitting there, Donna looked scared. He knelt down in front of her and put his hand under her chin, hoping to establish some eye contact.
"Donna, honey, look at me." He waited until she did to continue. "You can do this. I know you can, and when it is all done, you are going to be the best mother to this child. I know it looks hard, and I know it will hurt, but you're Donna. You left Dr. Freeride, went to New Hampshire, and helped to get a man elected president. You can do this."
Tears started rolling down Donna's cheeks as she thought more and more about giving birth and the video they just saw.
"I can't do this Josh. Did you see that video? I don't know how to do that and I don't know how to be a mother. I can't."
"Donna, you don't have to know how to give birth. It is going to come naturally to you. You will know what to do when that time comes. And being a mother, I have no doubts that you can do it. I promise you Donna, everything will be fine."
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---Present Day---
Donna has been in labor now for I don't know how long. It seems like we're getting there. Donna has been wanting to push, but they keep telling her to wait a few more minutes. She's been amazing just like I knew she would be. Though, on a number of occasions I have wanted to pass out, and I think my hand is broken. Nevertheless, I've gotten through it and here I am, as Donna's about to give birth.
"Josh?" I'm so focused on all the action that I don't look at her.
"You're doing great Donna; just remember to keep breathing, like we practiced." I go through the breathing motions, probably looking like an idiot.
"No, Josh, something doesn't feel right."
I look at her, and before I can say anything, the machines she is hooked up to start beeping wildly. "Doctor, what's going on?"
"Josh, I need you to wait outside."
I look back over at Donna and see that her eyes are closed.
"Donna? No doctor, I told her I would be here."
"Josh, I can't help her if you are here. You need to leave now."
I can't get anything else out before I am whisked out side by some rather large man-nurse. I don't know what to do. The women I love is lying there and something is wrong. I can't lose her, I just realized what she means to me. When I get to the waiting room, CJ is waiting there. Our friends have been taking turns waiting for news.
"She had the baby?!" CJ jumps up excitedly, but one look at me and she can see something is wrong.
"Josh? What happened?"
"I don't know. She said something didn't feel right and the machines started going off and then I got kicked out of the room." During my explanation, the tears start to fall and CJ wraps her arms around me in a hug.
"It'll be okay, Josh. She'll be okay." I wish I could believe her.
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---One Month Before---
"Tell me again how we got a Saturday afternoon off this close to the election?" Donna asked from the passenger seat. They were driving back to Josh's place after having found an apartment for Donna that afternoon.
"I'm not sure; the governor just declared it. I don't think he realizes he's not President yet."
"Well, thank you for spending it with me. I really like the place we found." She leaned over and placing a kiss on Josh's cheek.
Josh was a little flustered. He had been trying to avoid analyzing his feelings for his assistant and friend, but every time she touched him he couldn't help but think that he was in love.
The night went as he had expected. They ate some take-out, watched a movie and then fell asleep in his bed. But, unlike most nights when they had done this same thing, Josh turned on his side, head resting on his hand and watched as Donna slept. He admitted to himself that night that he was in love. It was the first time he ever felt so strongly for a woman. He also admitted that he loved this child. He couldn't wait to meet it. As he watched Donna, she rolled towards him and let out a sigh. Josh couldn't stop himself from placing a kiss on her lips. Part of him had hoped she would wake up and return the sentiment, but she didn't. He just laid there watching her, content, until he fell asleep, too.
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---Present Day---
I enter the hospital chapel and sit down in the back. I know, I'm Jewish and I don't really go to temple, but for some reason this is where I have to be. I haven't heard anything about Donna. I needed to pray, to talk to God. I figure Christian or Jewish, it's the same God. I look around at the other people sitting there, I briefly wonder why they are here, but that thought brings me back to Donna.
I can't do anything else for her but pray, so silently that's what I begin to do,
"Blessed are You, Lord, our God, King of the Universe…" I stop there because I don't really know what I am doing. I don't know if there is a formal prayer or blessing for something like this. It's a shame that I let my faith get so far away from me. But there has to be something I can say. Maybe if I just explain how I feel.
"God, I know it only seems like I pray to you when I need something. But I need something now. I need for Donna and her baby to be okay. I don't know what I can offer you or what I can say here but I know that I won't be okay if something happens to either one of them. Donna, she's never done anything wrong. She is a good person and she won't be okay if something happens to her child. I won't be okay if something happens to her or this child. I promise you lord, if you let them live and be okay, I'll try harder to be a better person. I'll do anything for them and I'll keep them safe. Please, just let me have that chance."
I just sit there afterwards, I don't know for how long, before I get up and return to the waiting room.
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---Three months ago---
"Josh?" Donna called from her desk but quickly getting up and moving into his office.
She wasn't sure at first. It was like a flutter in her stomach, but then she felt it again, only a little stronger. She realized it was the baby kicking and got so excited. Her first thought was to share it with Josh. As she entered his office, he was about to hurry out to her.
"Donna? What's wrong?" He said, worry in his eyes.
"Nothing. Give me your hand."
"Are you asking me to marry you Donna because I think that it should be done properly, with a ring and you down on one knee."
"Okay, I need you to stop being you and give me your hand." She laughed
He smiled at her and did as she asked. Donna took his had and laid it on the lower part of her belly where she was feeling the movement. The baby kicked again under his hand and Josh jumped back.
"Woah! What was that?"
Donna smiled at him. "It was the baby, Josh. The baby kicked."
Josh was instantly enthralled and placed both hands back on her belly. "Is this the first time?"
"Yeah. The first time I have felt it at least."
"Wow." Josh said and Donna could see that he was already bonding with her child.
"Yeah."
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---Present Day---
I'm only in the waiting room a few minutes, alone, when the doctor comes in. I can feel myself getting more and more nervous. It's been a long time. That could mean that there were a lot of complications. What if Donna is not okay? What if the baby didn't make it?
"Josh?"
"Yes Doctor?"
"The baby is fine." I release the breath that I was holding. Thank you, God.
"And Donna?"
"Well, there were unforeseen complications and she lost a lot of blood. We were able to control it and she is stabilized and should be awake shortly. She's going to be perfectly fine. We however are not able to tell how the complications may further affect her reproductive options."
"What does that mean?"
"It's unlikely, Josh, that she will be able to have anymore children."
She's can't have more children? I don't know how Donna is going to feel about that. But the baby is good and Donna will be okay. Right? "So, Donna is going to be okay?"
"Yes, Josh she should be a hundred percent in a couple of days." Thank you, God.
"Thank you Doctor."
"I'll leave you be, but I'll come back in about an hour. You should be able to see Donna and the baby then."
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---Election Day---
It had been a hectic day. Josh and Donna were running around trying to take care of last minute interviews, and trying to get lawyers in the right states and updating all the numbers.
It was late in the evening. They were in the middle of analyzing numbers when Donna interrupted Josh.
"Josh? Tell me everything is going to be okay."
"Donna, do you see these numbers! We're going to win this and you and I will be working in the White House."
"No, Josh. With the baby. Tell me everything is going to be okay with the baby."
Josh was a little thrown. He thought she had gotten over this fear with that first Lamaze class. He moved around his desk next to her and pulled her into a hug.
"Everything is going to be fine. This baby and you are going to be perfect. I know it."
They stayed in their embrace even as the people outside his office erupted into cheers as Governor Bartlet was declared the next President of the United States.
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---Present Day---
I quietly walk into the room. The doctor had come to get me and said that I could go see Donna now. When I open the door, my heart swells with the sight that is in front of me. Donna is sitting up with her child in her arms. So lost in its eyes, she doesn't even notice me until I sit next to her on the bed. I put my arm around her and lean over her shoulder.
"She's beautiful."
"Katherine." Donna says quietly, "Katherine Marie."
I can't help thinking 'Katherine Marie Lyman,' before I have to remind myself that she is not mine. That thought causes a pain in my chest.
"Katherine Marie Moss." Donna repeats a little louder.
I look up from Katherine to her mom, who even after everything looks beautiful and happy. "It's perfect."
TBC