Manipulation and Mistakes

YAY for Friday afternoon! (in Australia) I hope you enjoy your weekend. Extra special thanks to Random Authoress and Nazgul Queen for reviewing. (I told you it was twisted and terrifying!)

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"I'm taking Gracie." He's pretending that the statement shouldn't bother me a bit. I choke on my coffee and slam the cup down on the table.

"What?" I ask, glancing quickly at Gracie, who's pretending not to notice my shock. James doesn't look up from his porridge. "Can we discuss this somewhere else?" I say dangerously and it's not really a question. He reluctantly puts down his spoon and follows me into the living room.

"You've already discussed this with her?" I try to keep the anger out of my voice, but it's hard.

'Elizabeth, this is non-negotiable." He says firmly, looking out the window and not at me. "Who would she stay with except for me?"

"I am her mother." I almost shout. I love her, despite the fact that I haven't cared for her much over the last 9 years. "I'm her only blood relative in this house." And it's true, though James doesn't like to hear it.

He flinches and turns around.

"Despite the fact that you are her mother, I wouldn't leave her in your care for anything." He snaps and this time I'm the one flinching. "You've never cared for her in your life."

"That's not true." I whisper, hurt more than I can possibly say.

"Elizabeth – " He tries to take back the words, but it's too late.

"Is that what you really think?" The hurt is vanishing, replaced quickly with burning anger. "Because I think you're too much of a coward to tell Gracie the truth about the trip you're going on."

"What truth?" He's panicking, catching my arm before I can burst out into the Breakfast room.

"That the purpose of the trip is to kill her father." I say. He opens his mouth to protest. "Her real father," I interrupt. He falls silent.

"Do you even know whether it's Sparrow or Turner?" He asks in a strange voice. I blush and turn away, because he's right, I don't know. He laughs bitterly.

"Elizabeth….?" I can hear the hesitation in his voice as his hand on my arm draws me closer. Suddenly I know that this is my chance to get where I want to go. I turn so our faces are only inches apart. He's still hesitating, so I lean closer to him and let my eyelids flutter shut. He closes his mouth over mine and for his sake I try very hard not to think of anyone else. Only the thought that I'm doing it for Jack and Gracie and him, keeps me from moving away or slapping him.

Eventually we have to take a breath and I move away, clenching my fist behind my back. My nails are digging into my palm so hard that I can feel the blood running down the back of my hand.

"Take me with you…" I plead manipulatively, looking at him through my long eyelashes. I feel like a bitch, but if it gets me where I have to be, then so be it.

In his head he's trying to justify taking me. I bet he's thinking about Beckett's letter. 'I would recommend that you do not take your wife on the voyage, I believe that she and Turner have some kind of history'. Some kind of history is an understatement.

"Please…" I move closer so my whole body is pressed up against his. That's all the persuasion he needs.

"Alright." He sounds reluctant, but his eyes don't look it. "We leave tomorrow, so you'd better start packing." He smiles as I whirl out the door, full of the childish energy I thought I'd long forgotten.

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"Aren't you happy, Mama?" Gracie smiles, bouncing up and down on her toes with nervous energy.

I smile for her, but my heart isn't in it. Seeing all these ships around me, gently bobbing in the waves, it's bringing back memories.

"You love him?"

His voice is painfully soft and at first I don't turn around.

I give an amused snort,

"Jack? Of course not," My tone is light-hearted, but my feelings anything but.

Jack's back, along with the Pearl, Barbossa's banished and Davy Jones is dead, Bootstrap has been rescued… The adventures are over. This should be the bit where Will declares everlasting love for me and kisses me to the light of the sinking sun.

But it's not going according to plan.

"Then why?" He persists.

"Why what?"

"Elizabeth…" His voice is soft and I can't quite tell if he says my name as curse or prayer. I turn to him, leaning up against the rail, and scrutinise his sad brown eyes, hoping they'll reveal the truth to me. They don't. "You frustrate me so, I can't tell if you truly mean anything any more. "He says.

He sighs and I can feel a cold feeling rising in the pit of my stomach. Why couldn't he just have abided by the plan, goddamnit?

"If you don't love him, then why were you with him last night?"

"Oh!" The sound inadvertently pops out of my mouth as I whirl away in horror, my cheeks flushing furiously. "That was a mistake…" My voice trembles.

"Elizabeth…" His hands are on my waist and he spins me around, his lips coming down unto mine with an undeniable passion. My heart races like nothing I've ever experienced before as he moves his mouth from my lips, only to whisper my name into my neck. An intense longing, a terrible shivery feeling to good for words steals over me as our bodies press closer.

"Will…" I find myself moaning his name like it will save me from drowning in the scary feeling that's threatening to submerge me…

"Mama?"

"Sorry, Gracie." I shake the memories from my head, snapping open my fan to hide the blush from Gracie's curious eyes. My fan is flapping jerkily by the time James greets us at the docks and prepares to escort us onto the new ship. The Endeavour, one of Beckett's finest.

By the look in my husband's eyes I can see he's already regretting this. I smile flirtatiously and flap my fan in his direction. He looks away quickly, uncomfortable with my open affection. A bright bloom of happiness bursts inside me as I step up on the ship, finally.

Gulls soar over my head, screeching their song to the wind. The wind tears at my constrained hair and I feel happiness steal over me like a thief in the night. I smile over my fan at James, who only frowns.

"Prepare to cast off!"

Gracie and I squeal in delight as the wind makes the sails billow and puff out. I grab her tiny waist, already firmly corseted and heft her up onto the rail. We watch as Port Royal shrinks into the distance, leaning over the rail dangerously. She flings her arms around my neck and presses a sticky kiss to my cheek.

"You're happy now, aren't you, Mama."

"Yes, yes I am." I smile at her, but I'm thinking of someone else. Someone I haven't been this close to in years.

She presses another kiss to my cheek and we lean there for a while. One of my legs is in the air, my skirts hitched up about my thighs, but I couldn't have cared less. James apparently didn't share my opinion.

"Elizabeth," He whispers into the back of my neck, leaning over us, making us look like the perfect happy family. "Have you any idea that the entire crew is enjoying a very nice view of your behind at the moment."

"James, I really don't give a damn."

"Elizabeth!" He snatches Gracie from my arms and passes her into the arms of a passing officer. "Be good for Lieutenant Andrews, Gracie." He grabs my wrist in an iron grip and heaves me back onto both my feet.

Once we are in the cabin he turns back to me, eyes flashing dangerously.

"You are my wife, Elizabeth, and I expect you to behave like it – "

"I'm not your anything!" I snap, watching as a quick flash of hurt replaces the anger in his eyes for a second, so quick I might have imagined it.

"You must behave proper, whether you like it or not."

"Proper, proper, proper!" I shriek, tears burning at my lashes. "Is that all life is for you? A chance to be proper? I'm tired of proper, James. Wait – Don't you dare lock me in here – James!"

But it's too late, I pound my fists against the hard wood but it doesn't give. Tears of self-pity slide down my cheeks and I brush them away angrily. It's not fair…

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