A/N: Welcome back!!! Okay, I'm soooo sorry it took me so long to repost, but I was in NYC, so… yeah, I couldn't. I saw GREASE with Max Crumm and Laura Osnes, and IT WAS AMAZING!!!!! Sorry… anyway, here (finally) is the third installment of My Life as a Black, so sit back, relax, and enjoy!

Oh, also! I now have a c2!!! Yeah, it's called Guilty Pleasures, and it's an archive of all those stories that you shouldn't want to read, but you can't help but read them obsessively (i.e. smut, bondage, violence, pedophilia, etc.), so subscribe and enjoy!!!

I woke up rather reluctantly from a very pleasant dream.

:fade into dream:

Remus runs in between the trees, transparent ivory shirt and flowing black pants cascading behind him. His hair is caressing his face in a sort of twisted dance. I watch him run for a bit, his slim bare feet creating trails which entwine the trees like a gossamer string.

He looks back at me and smirks.

"Hello Sirius."

I stand there, dumbfounded. How did this perfect angel even know I existed?

He comes toward me, running ever faster by the second.

He stops right in front of me, his stormy eyes staring into my own chocolate colored ones.

"Run with me."

He takes my hand, his long, slender fingers knotted with mine, as my heart stops beating.

And I realize something:

I'm frickin' in love!

Then I'm jostled out of my reverie by none other than His Royal Sexiness.

"Wake up Pads. 'S time for Potions."

Does he always have to whisper so dreamily?

O, damn. No pun intended there. Sorry.

Anyway, why did he have to be so hot? And sweet, and hot, and loving, and hot, and compassionate, and hot, and clever, and, erm, did I mention hot?

"Moony, go the fuck away and leave me the hell alone."

Woah, did I just tell Remus to go the fuck away?

AND to leave me the hell alone?

Damn it!!!

I'm such a frickin' dickhead when I'm nervous….

O my shit!

I'm nervous when Remus is around!

DAMN IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"Fine, Pads. Sorry I disturbed you. Just reminding you, tonight we're all going to the Three Broomsticks for Valentine's Day, so bring Narcissa, 'kay?"

"No, wait Moons. I'm sorry, I'm just not a morning person…."

"I've noticed."

Then he smirked that awful, beautiful smirk of his.

O damn. The butterflies are back. Well, better fix this up.

I had always half-way told people what I was feeling by saying it in a dramatically sarcastic manner. Luckily, nobody had figured it out quite yet.

"Oh, Remus! It's because I love you! Oh, Remus, dahling!"

Then I fell into his arms, fake-sobbing as though I was in one of those muggle soap operas.

It felt so good.

:skip to the evening:

"Cissa! Come on, we're gonna be late!"

"Sirius! Where's my gift? It IS Valentine's Day, and I AM your girlfriend!"

"You know as well as I do that neither of us want that…."

"O shut up. Let's go, arsehole."

I walked with Narcissa to end of the road.

Narcissa is an… interesting… character.

This is the basic gist of Narcissa Black:

She's my girlfriend

Neither of us like each other at all

She's obsessed with money

She has a "secret" sexual affair with her sister, Bellatrix

She's a bitch on a stick

She's clingy as hell

Lucky me.

Anyway, we saw Moony, Prongs, and Wormtail at the start of the road. They were accompanied by their dates.

Moony was with Lily Evans, a red-haired Gryffindor who was exceptionally bright. And Prongs was obsessive about her. Kind of creepy, really. He had a frickin' picture of her hung up on the ceiling above his bed.

Prongs was with his "girlfriend," Calliope Erato. I guess the best way to describe her is y her nickname: Calliope Erotic. Yeah… she could give any guy a boner just by looking at him. She was a great singer, too. People swore she was half-siren.

Peter was with Frida Bulstrode, a Gryffindor. She kind of looked like a toad, to tell you the truth. But she wasn't NEARLY as bad as her sister, Satana Bulstrode. Not only did she look like a toad, but she was also a Slytherin! Ew.

"Hey Padfoot!"

"Oh god, Remus! Not those awful nicknames again!"

"Fine, Lily. Hello, Siri."

"Hey, Mooooony. How's it goin, Moooooony?"

"Ughh, you are such a nuisance Sirius. Why are you friends with him, Remus?"

Remus just sighed and bowed his head.

No! My poor Moonsy is unhappy! Padfoot to the rescue!!!

"Well, I guess I'm going to have to answer for him. Lily, it's fairly simply actually. It's because I'm so devastatingly sexy, nobody can really resist it."

"O, well I seem to be resisting just fine."

"My fault entirely. I forgot to mention: I have no power over unsexy people."

"How rude!"

"Well, let's get moving! We do have reservations, you know."

Thank you Moons. Once again, you save the day.

"Yeah! And Sirius promised me Firewhiskey!!!"

"I said only if you stop annoying me, Narcissa."

"Whatever, let's get moving."

Damn, this can't possibly go well….

A/N: Okay, so, this chapter sucked too, but NOBODY told me what they wanted! Except tehfanglyfish, and trust me, you will get your wish, just not quite yet. :wink: REVIEW AND TELL ME WHAT THE HELL YOU WANT, OTHERWISE I END UP WRITING MORE CHAPTERS LIKE THIS!!! Thanks!