sorry guys for not updating in so long...school has been so crazy!!
heres a nice long update to make up for it...so READ and REVIEW!!
Be prepared for angsty drama from now on hehe
Note: this includes a meraddison friendship...
It had been four months since they were married- since that oh so magical day.
Everything had been perfect: the reception in the beautiful seaside restaurant and the honeymoon in Bora-Bora.
Even until recently, everything was perfect. But now, Meredith wasn't so sure.
Ever since a couple months ago, Meredith had started getting sick. She had an almost constant fever and she was almost always exhausted-even more than usual.
Now, she felt burning hot as she tried to bolt to the bathroom to splash some cool water on her face. Instead she tripped and fell onto the hard, mahogany floor. It wasn't a big or painful fall or anything but when she got up off the floor, she noticed that there was a huge bruise on her kneecap, that hurt like crap. She winced in pain as she hobbled over to the sink and splashed some water on both her face and bruise.
She realized what this might mean. Before she thought, it was just the stress of being an intern but now- now…she knew something was wrong. Bruising this easily, well, it could mean a lot of things and Meredith knew all the possibilities. She realized she had no choice but to get a check-up.
Derek had been concerned for sometime now but she always assured him it was nothing. And now she thought, he might have been right. Derek had left very early for the hospital, for an emergency craniotomy.
So, Meredith got dressed and hopped in her jeep to go to Seattle Grace. She realized that she might as well do it there because everyone would find out eventually, anyways.
When she reached there, she sighed in relief as she found out that now since she was a resident, she didn't have anything scheduled for a couple of hours, giving her time to take the test. So, she paged the head of oncology who was a good friend of Derek's.
Finally she heard Dr. Peterson say cheerfully, "Meredith! Did you page me?"
"Yeah I did."
"Well, what can I do for you this morning?"
"Um…I need you to do me a favor." Meredith's voice betrayed her fear.
"Sure. What is it?"
"I need you to perform a blood and bone test on me."
"Ok...may I ask why?"
"Well it's just I may have something. I don't know what, but I need to be sure, you know."
"Absolutely. Are you free now?"
"Yeah I am."
"Ok. Let's get you checked up then."
Dr. Peterson performed the blood and bone test on Meredith, taking a sample of both her blood and her bone marrow. Now, all they had to do was wait for the results. They would have to wait a couple of hours.
For now, Meredith resumed her work. This morning, she was assisting on an interesting case with Derek. The teenage girl, named Juliet Johnson had hydroencephalus. They needed to drain the fluid quickly before it killed her. So, both of them prepped her for surgery and wheeled her into the OR.
Meredith had not told Derek about the test yet. She hadn't told anyone. She wanted to be sure of it before they found out.
Right when Derek was putting on his gloves to start the procedure, Dr. Peterson came in to the OR. The look that he had on his face told Meredith everything.
"Derek…"
"Hi Nathan! Um…is anything wrong?"
"I just need to speak to Meredith in private if that's ok."
"Of course." Derek then said to Meredith, "I'll see you later Mer." And he gave her a quick kiss on the cheek.
She smiled almost sadly at him in return and left with Dr. Peterson.
Neither of them said a word till they reached his office.
Meredith was the first to speak. "I guess it's cancer then right?' Her voice was slowly breaking and the sorrow in her voice was obvious.
Dr. Peterson looked at her sadly and said, "I'm so sorry Meredith. You have cancer in the form of AML."
"Acute Myeloid Leukemia?"
"Yes."
"What's my prognosis?"
He decided to tell her the whole truth since she was also a surgeon. "Well we looked at your cytogenetics and we determined that you are still in the intermediate stage, which means you have a 48 chance of a five-year survival rate and a 50 chance of relapsing with treatment."
"So what are my options?"
"Well, I'd like to start you immediately on chemotherapy."
Meredith gave a huge sigh. "Ok, yeah. I just….can we wait for a couple of hours because I need to tell Derek and my friends."
"That's fine. I'll be ready for your treatment then."
"Ok."
Meredith decided to wait by the board for Derek to finish his surgery, which would probably take another hour or so.
So she sat on the stairs, crying softly to herself.
When Derek came out of surgery, an hour later, and saw Meredith all hunched up and staring out into space, he knew immediately that there was something wrong.
Her face was paler than usual and she had a haunting, depressing look on her face. On top of that, she looked already completely exhausted.
He approached her carefully and said, "Meredith, sweetheart, what's wrong?"
She looked up and smiled sadly at him. "Derek I…we need to talk."
"Ok. Let's go into my office."
Once inside, Derek took Meredith in his arms and sat down with her on the couch, holding her tightly in his embrace.
As Derek brushed a few stray curls from her face, he once more said, "Meredith, tell me what's wrong."
Meredith took a deep breath and said, "Well you were right Derek."
"About what?"
"About me. You said that maybe I should get checked-up with my fever and exhaustion. See this morning, I woke up with a high fever again. So I tried to get cooled off in the bathroom when I slightly tripped and fell on the floor. I got this enormous, ugly bruise and so I realized that I had to get tests done."
Derek's expression changed to one of concern to one of fear in a matter of seconds.
"Well Nathan performed the test and we just got the results back."
"Meredith…" His tone was clearly fearful.
"Derek….I have AML- Acute Myeloid Leukemia." Meredith's voice was also breaking.
"No! NO! That can't be right. NO!" Derek was getting increasingly hysterical.
"Derek…It is….I have leukemia."
This time it was Derek who held on to Meredith and cried in sorrow, spilling tears in a frenzy.
After a few minutes of shared tears, Derek whispered, "What's the prognosis?"
"I have a 48 survival rate and a 50 chance of relapse…I have to start intensive chemo immediately."
Derek just nodded numbly.
"Derek please…don't do this. I can beat this. But I need you by my side. Don't give up on me now- on us now, please." Her voice teetered on the brink of cracking.
Derek said nothing and he simply got up and left the room, slamming the door behind him, leaving Meredith all alone, tears rolling down her face.
Ten minutes later, Addison was walking towards Derek's office, intending to get him to look at one of her cases.
When she opened the door, she felt her heart drop to her stomach. Even though they had all been through it and she was still Satan in some ways, Meredith and her had grown to be good friends, over time. So, seeing Meredith curled up and in unrelenting tears, broke her heart. She walked towards the couch and sat down, next to Meredith.
Meredith finally noticed her presence as she jumped up and finally chocked back a response. "Addie!"
"Mer…what's wrong?"
"Oh nothing! Nothing's wrong. Everything's fine!"
"Seriously Meredith….you know I know you better than that. What's wrong?"
Meredith sighed in defeat. "Addie…promise me you won't react like Derek did."
"Which was?..."
"Well he stormed out." Meredith's voice betrayed the sadness in her.
"I promise Meredith that I'll do no such thing but listen and help you in anyway I can."
Meredith smiled gratefully at Addie as she took a deep breath and for the second time that day, sadly said, "Addie, I'm sick.."
"What do you mean, sick? Like I have a cold kind of sick or..."
"No….I've been pretty sick lately. Non-stop fevers and constant fatigue. I just thought it was stress or something- the life of an intern, right?" She paused and gave a bitter laugh. "Well, this morning as I was going to the bathroom, I sort of tripped and fell. When I got up I had this huge bruise on my knee."
"Oh my god.." Addie started to realize.
"Yeah so I came in today and took a bone and blood test. I just got the results back."
"Meredith…no…" Tears started to silently spill from her eyes.
"I have AML…acute myeloid leukemia…" She trailed off as reality hit her again, and both of them started to cry.
Meredith finally said, "But I have a 48 survival rate…and I start intensive chemo immediately." Meredith was trying to be positive.
"Mer."
"Yeah?"
"I just want you to know two things. First, I will always be here for you every step of the way. Second, I don't want you to worry about Derek, ok? Just give him time. He loves you and he will support you like he always has but he needs to time to process this."
"Thank you Addie. It means a lot to me that you care."
The two women exchanged sisterly hugs.
Addison cautiously said, "Meredith, I hate to bother you with this now, but I think you should notify the Chief before you do anything else."
"Yeah, you're right. I'll go now."
She stood up and said after a short pause, "Do I look ok?"
Addison amused, said, "Yeah, Mer, you look ok."
Meredith did notice her tone. "Well sorry Miss Gucci and Prada…but I don't want to look like shit in front of the Chief."
At this, Addison couldn't help laughing, and soon, Meredith did too.
"I'm serious Addie!" Meredith couldn't keep a straight face.
"Oh, me too! You have no idea…." Addie was laughing her head off.
"Yeah right!" After a pause Meredith said, "Ok, seriously I have to go see the Chief now. Thanks for cheering me up Addie! You're one of the best, you know."
"No problem, Mer. I'm always going to be here for you even in all my satanic Gucci and Prada glory."
The two smiled at each other and Meredith left for the chief.
"Is the Chief in Patricia?"
"Oh go right ahead, Meredith."
"Thanks."
So, Meredith walked in to the Chief's office. He looked up immediately.
"Meredith! What can I do for you today?"
"Um…we need to talk Chief."
"Sure. Sit down." The Chief said as he gestured to the chair in front of his desk.
"What do you want to talk about?"
"Well…this isn't easy for me to say…but I'm just going to say it." So she took a deep breath and said, "Chief, I have AML- acute myeloid leukemia."
"Oh Meredith…." The Chief was acutely shocked.
"Yeah, I just wanted to tell you before…you know the rumor mill did." She gave a sad smile.
"What's the prognosis?" The chief was trying to be strong but Meredith could see that he was clearly breaking down, when she saw tears glistening in his eyes.
"I have a 48 chance of a five-year survival rate and a 50 chance of relapsing with treatment. I've already talked to Dr. Peterson about it since he did my tests and well I'm going to start intensive chemo immediately."
Suddenly, the Chief grabbed Meredith's hands and said with complete sincerity. "I will always be here for you Meredith. I know I'm not your father, but I really do care about you. I believe in you and your strength, and I know you will beat this."
Meredith gave a true smile in return. "Thank you Chief. It means so much that you care."
"Have you told Derek yet?" He asked gently.
Meredith nodded in return and said, "He took it hard…He kind of left, but I know he just needs some time right? He will be here right?" Sobs started wracking through her body.
The Chief immediately got up off his chair, walked over to Meredith and wrapped her petite frame in his strong arms.
"Listen to me, Meredith! I know Derek and I know that he loves you with all his heart. He will always be there for you. He just needs a little time, so that he can figure out how to support you ok? But he will be here, I promise you."
Meredith smiled gratefully up at him and said, "I know he will."
After a few seconds, she added, "I'm going to go talk to the others, just let them know."
"Go ahead."
"One more thing Chief. I don't want much special treatment. If I get sick then fine, but I don't want to be treated like someone who's already dying."
"I understand Meredith."
Meredith got up, and opened the door to the hallway, as she gave him one last small smile and then left to find her friends.
so what did you guys think???? R&R