So I think last chapter set a record for reviews. Equals Awesomeness! hehe

Chapter 10

A few weeks later

So Nathan and Rachel started going out. Three weeks, five days ago actually. Which makes it three weeks, seven days ago that Nathan last spent the night…in my room. It's only been like 12 hours since he last stayed the night; only he was in Rachel's room. It's been awhile since Nathan and I've even had a real conversation. It's only been 12 hours since he and Rachel have had sex.

It's only been 12 hours since I've thrown up.

Brooke is worried, and I don't blame her. In the last month or so, I've lost eight pounds. She thinks I'm too thin, and I can't help but agree. It's not like I don't eat; I eat like crazy. And it's not like I purposely throw up all the time. I'm not bulimic. I just haven't found a better way to deal with all this stress.

At least I don't cut my wrists, or some other emo shit like that.

Brooke always insists on girls' nights at least two times a week now. This includes hours of eating ice cream, watching movies, dancing, or whatever. It also means I can leave the house, binge on food, and not worry about seeing it again later on. Little by little, Brooke is making me fat. And for once, this is definitely a good thing.

It's not the most orthodox form of therapy, but hell, it definitely works the best.

My soccer coach is even getting worried. At our last game, she benched me halfway through the third quarter. Usually I play the entire time. I was persistent in telling her I was fine, but she said she didn't want me to fall and break in half. Geez woman, it isn't that serious. I've gained three pounds back. Brooke has even gotten around to picking on me about it nowadays, though I don't really mind. It means things are returning to normal, and that she doesn't have to worry about me so much.

"Hales, I swear. If you don't grow some meat on those pretty little bones of yours soon, I might not let you rejoin the squad. I don't want any rumors about an anorexic on our team. Bad public image." She teases.

I begin to pull a folder out of my locker, and out of the corner of my eye, I can see Nathan and Rachel walking down the hall hand-in-hand. At least they kept it civil in school; at home they fuck like a pair of wild rabbits. Have I mentioned the fact that I've stayed over at Brooke's house many times during the past couple of weeks? It's a good thing that Lucas understands. Well, he sort of does. It's not like he knows the whole story, he thinks I'm just easily disgusted by all the PDA.

Can you blame me? How would you feel first off, if your walls constantly shook, and the music you most heard was that of moans and mattresses? Yeah, disgusting. Now add in the factor that it's the guy I love and my sister? It's enough to make anyone go crazy.

It seems that Nathan and I are mutually avoiding eachother lately. Me for obvious reasons; it hurts too damn much to hear him talk about Rachel, plus soccer has kept me pretty busy. Him, well I haven't figured that one out yet, but he's also training for preseason, in the time not spent with Rachel.

Out of the corner of my eye I see them making out at her locker, which is only a few down from mine. "Thank God it's the end of the day." I think.

I sling my backpack over my shoulders and walk past them to Brooke's locker, which is a few past Rachel's. "Hey Haley." She says as I walk by. I turn around. Nathan's arms are holding onto her waist, and for a second it looks like he's avoiding my gaze. Talk about weird.

"What are your plans? Do we get the house alone again after school, or you actually gonna join us for once?" She teases, and I give a small smile. "Ohh sounds kinky." She says as an afterthought.

"You would know." I smirk. "Anyway, I think I'm gonna go to Brooke's. I'll be home around ten though probably." Nathan's eyes meet mine, and for a second I lose myself. His eyes aren't as inviting as they always used to be, which I can't blame him for, but that glimmer is still there, along with a slightly worried expression that appears as he looks me over. Rachel presently has her back turned and she's piling books into her bag, she doesn't notice the silent exchanges Nate and I share.

His eyes are definitely worried now. His face is confused too, this is the first time we've had any sort of contact in the past couple of weeks. He shoots me a look, mouthing the words, "Are you okay?" Usually these words would be taken as common courtesy, but Nathan is genuinely concerned. His eyes give him away every time.

I mouth back, "I'm fine." Automatically thinking he'll believe it, like he normally does nowadays. Surprisingly he shakes his head, not believing me for a second. "Yeah right." He mouths back, slightly pissed off now.

Now it's my turn to be confused. He went from worried to angry within ten seconds. I give him a questioning look. "Why are you lying?" He mouths, and, turns around to face Rachel, just as Brooke comes up to me. "Hey, ready?" She asks.

"Yeah." I say, and we begin to head down the hallway, I give Nathan a look as we walk past him. What the hell just happened?

As we ride to Brooke's in silence, I can't help but notice that even through all the distance between us nowadays, Nathan still knows me better than anyone.

Once we get to her house, we drop our bags and head into the kitchen. I'm in the middle of getting out my homework when the doorbell rings. "I'll get it!" I yell up to Brooke, who's in her room picking out a movie.

I open the door to see Lucas standing there. "Hey." He says awkwardly.

"Hey Luke. C'mon in."

"Are you stating tonight?" He asks suddenly.

"Nah. Just the day. Need something?" I ask worriedly.

"No, I was just gonna see if Brooke wanted to hang out." He says. "But I'll come back tomorrow or something." He turns around to leave.

"Lucas, wait. Come on in, I'm about to head out anyway." I say.

"Are you sure?" He asks.

"Positive." I nod my head in affirmation. It suddenly occurred to me that in the past few weeks that I'd been hanging out with Brooke, Lucas hadn't seen his girlfriend very often. Feeling guilty, I decide to let them be, maybe for a few days. Brooke had been there for me for too long, it's not fair to expect her to pick me off the floor all the time.

We head into the house and I grab my bag, just as Brooke comes down the stairs with a movie. "Hey Hales, is Dreamgirls oka-?" She asks, when she suddenly sees Lucas. "Hey!" She says happily, giving him a huge hug.

Lucas looks at me. "Just leaving?" He mouths, a smile on his face. I blush in response. Oops, caught in the act. I shrug.

"Hey Brooke, I think I'm gonna head out, give you and Boy toy some time together." I smile.

"Hey, it's no big deal, really." Lucas says, but I shake it off.

"Nah, it's cool." I reply.

I said goodbye to both, and headed for home. I'm glad they're together. They deserve eachother so much, and I can't help but feel slightly guilty for hindering it for the past few weeks.

Third person-Brooke's house.

After Haley left, Brooke gingerly kissed Lucas. He easily returned it before pulling away.

"Is Haley okay?" He asked her.

Brooke shrugged. "She'll be fine. She's just in a funk lately."

"Yeah…I noticed she's been over here a lot lately. Are she and Nathan okay? I haven't seen them together in awhile. Hell, I haven't even seen him in awhile. He's always with Rachel. He's actually really quiet lately, and pretty moody."

"Yeah. I hear ya. But she'll be fine. Now me, on the other hand…" She whispered huskily, "I've been very male-deprived lately." She says suggestively, and he merely grinned in response.

Haley's POV

Before I open the door to my house, I try to prepare myself for what I'm about to possibly walk into. It still hurts, like hell actually, but as long as Nathan's happy, I guess I am too.

Bullshit.

Whatever. I'll have to get over it eventually.

Upon entering my house, I'm utterly surprised. Instead of hearing the familiar moans coming from the general direction of her bedroom, I hear them shouting at eachother from the kitchen.

"Rachel, you're being ridiculous!"

"Ridiculous? How the fuck am I being ridiculous, Nathan? The fact that my former best friend was totally hitting on you today, and you just let her do it? That's so ridiculous!"

"She grabbed my hand, I didn't touch her! My god, get it through your head; I don't like Theresa! She annoys the shit out of me, okay?! I can't stand her!"

"Oh, so now you can't stand her?! Nice cover you lying bastard! And what about Bevin, I bet you'd screw her in a minute, wouldn't you?!"

"What the fuck are you on? I like you. Y-O-U! Jesus Christ Rachel, why can't you get that?"

"Oh please. You hardly touch me anymore! You're probably cheating on me right now!"

"Are you fucking serious? It's a never-ending thing with you! Why fuck someone else when I can have you anytime I want?"

"Anytime you want? ANY FUCKING TIME YOU WANT NATHAN? I'm not a fucking whore!"

"I didn't say that!"

"You implied it! Besides, you've probably cheated on me plenty of times since we've started dating!"

Seriously, did I just step into the twilight zone or something? I thought everything was fine between these two.

"When Rachel? I spend every fucking minute with you, apart from training for basketball!"

"Whatever Nathan. I'm so fucking sick of this sh-" She says walking out from the kitchen, and upon seeing me, she freezes for a sec.

"Haley, hey." She says, her voice a lot calmer now. Nathan follows a few steps behind her, wondering why she suddenly went quiet. He stops too. Rachel quickly slides her arm around his waist, and leans up and gives him a quick peck on the cheek.

Nathan looks beyond confused, and I must say I probably look the same.

"Weren't you going to Brooke's?" She asks tentatively.

"Uhh yeah. Change of plans." I say, and eye them curiously. "Are you guys okay?"

Rachel nods her head quickly. "We're fine. Lovers' quarrel, right baby?" She asks, looking up towards him. Nathan nods his head slowly, and diverts his eyes to the ground when Rachel turns away.

"Uhh okay. I'll be in my room if you need me." I say after a moment of silence.

"Yeah. I'm going for a run soon." Rachel says, completely ignoring Nathan. "Actually now." She says, looking at the clock on the wall. She leaves the house, still wearing jeans and a halter-top. Not exactly running clothes.

Nathan and I stand there for a second, rather awkwardly. Like I said, it's been awhile since we've even had a decent conversation.

"Want to talk about it?" I ask him.

"Not exactly." He answers. Giving me a once-over, he finally realizes what's different about me. Glancing at my frail body, he asks, "Want to talk about it?"

"Not exactly." I say, making eye contact, then quickly look down at the floor.

"We should." He says after a moment.

"What?"

"Talk about it."

"Ok…come on."

We walked up to my room; he's about three steps behind me.

I open the door and collapse on my bad. He just stands there rather uncomfortably.

"You can lay down you know. I won't bite." I joke, trying to ease the obvious tension.

"It's not your bite I'm afraid of." He admits, finally meeting my eye. "She already thinks I'm cheating on her with her friends. I don't need her thinking it about you too."

"It'll be fine, Nate. She knows us."

"Which 'us', Haley? The inseparable best friends or the distant acquaintances that can't even communicate without all the obvious tension?"

"What do you think we're doing right now? You'll be fine Nate, just sit down and relax for a minute."

"Easy for you to say. She doesn't chew your ass out 24/7." He admits, but sits down nonetheless.

24/7? Which means they've fought more than just this one occasion?

"What happened?" I ask him.

"She's thinks I'm cheating on her."

"Are you?"

"Of course not." He snaps, and then looks up guiltily. "Sorry."

"Don't worry about it."

"Look, You sure you want to hear this? I don't want to dump all my problems on you Hales, especially when you look like shit yourself."

"Thanks." I joke. "Then what do you call all those problems with your family? Pleasantries?"

Finally a laugh out of him. Slowly he begins to settle in, leaning back against the bed.

"I'm not cheating on her. I don't know what sparked it, but one day, she just asked me. I denied it, and she forgot about it. She asked me a few days later, and I denied it again. But she still thinks I'm hiding something from her, though I have no idea what."

"She's complicated Nathan. And she's scared, she likes you a lot."

"Yeah. But I can't help but think that every time she asks me, she's almost hoping I say yes. Almost to relieve her own guilt."

"You think she's cheating on you?"

"I don't know. I don't want to think about it." He answers truthfully.

"Are you guys really that dysfunctional?" I ask tentatively.

"No, we're worse than that."

"Then why keep at it?"

Nathan doesn't answer. Slowly, I get a sinking suspicion.

"Do you love her?" My breath catches in my throat as I ask him this, hoping I don't breakdown at his answer.

"Hell no." He answers, taking me by complete surprise. He's not lying. "I definitely don't love her Hales."

"Then why…?" I ask, as the familiar playfulness returns to his eyes. "Ewww. Nate, definitely don't want to think about that! Hearing it while you guys do it is bad enough!" By now he's smirking, and it's beginning to feel like the old times.

"I'm sorry Haley, but the sex is just that good."

I stifle a laugh. "It should be, you guys are the equivalent of eachother. It's like a match made in whore-heaven." I tease.

"Oh believe me…it's definitely heaven." He smirks, and I lightly shove him.

"I'm not surprised. You guys do it enough."

"Nah…not that often, lately anyway."

We return to silence, and for a minute I lay there just thinking. It still hurts to imagine the two of them having sex, but not nearly as much as it would if he actually loved her. The moment he said that, it was like an enormous weight had lifted off my shoulders.

"So what about you?" He asks.

"What about me?"

"What's with being the Nicole Richie look- a-like?"

"It's not that drastic Nate, I've just been under a lot of stress."

"Are you sure, you're not like, anorexic?"

"Pshh. God no!"

"Well that's good." He says. "What about bulimia?"

"Nathan, I solemnly swear I do not have an eating disorder!" I say through a laugh.

"Good." He says, slowly putting a hand on my waist, delicately running his fingers over my slightly visible ribs. "Because you're perfect just the way you are."

"Aww thanks Nate." I smile genuinely.

One of the rare times in the last three weeks and five days.