Part 3:
I felt a pleasure feeling after taking the Vicodin. I grabbed the photos and stared at them for a while, then I put them in my pocket. I walked out the lounge and saw Susan sitting in the admin' looking at nothing.
"Hey"
She didn't answer, so I shook my hand in front of her, to make sure she was awake. She blinked and shook her head.
"What?"
"What were you thinking?"
"Uh... I'm so sad! I can't believe! I just lost my best friend!"
I could feel the pain she was feeling as much as I could see her eyes fill with tears. And quickly I began to feel mine too.
"You just lost a friend! What about me? I just lost my soulmate. The love of my life!", My voice got louder, almost yelling, "And I can't bring her back! I wanted to say 'I love you' and have her in my arms! How does it feel? How does it feel to have the person you're in love with gone?"
Susan took a moment to absorb this and then answered in a calm tone, despite of my anger.
"I don't know, John. I've never been through this before"
"Yeah, you don't!", I shouted, "Then don't come trying to help me because you don't know what it's like", I walked to her and said loudly, "You don't know what it's like"
I stormed out and left County. I sat in the bench in the ambulance bay to breathe and chill out.
"Any word on Pratt's thorachotomy?"
"I haven't heard"
"Do you wanna talk about it?"
"There's nothing to talk about"
"Oh no? It started after your assault?"
"I said I didn't wanna talk about it"
"No, you said there was nothing to talk about"
"Whatever. Carter, it's not what you think. I can handle this-"
"Relax, Abby. I'm not throwing the program at you; I'm just trying to help"
"Don't need any help"
"Six years, you know, you were sober for six years"
"Right. That was then. I'm a different person now. What, I'm not shooting up! I had a beer. I had a beer. Stop trying to make it such a big deal"
"It is a big deal. It's not about the beer you had yesterday, or the two that you're gonna want today or the six that you're going to want tomorrow..."
"It's under control"
"Oh, is it?"
"Yes, it is. And it's not a reaction, it's a decision. My decision"
I took a deep breath after heading home.