He's such a sad man. Well Atticus tried to help him, but he done got himself into a right bad fix... and that waddn't Atticus fault... No, it was not.. If anything it was his fault.. Getting himself into such a bad fix..

"Its not his fault you know."

He's still standing there . I don't know what 'e wants me to say to 'em.

"I said it wadd't Atticus's Fault, He tried, so shoo."

He's not listening to me. He's just standing there. I wish Atticus was here...

Jem?

"Jem! help Me get him out of here."

"out of where, scout? We're in his yard."

We were? I could of sworn... Where could i have sworn we were?...

"Jem! Where you Goin'?"

"Atticus is comming back from work."

I knew that. But it wasn't 5? The town bell wasn't ringing. Or Not that i could hear at least. it seamed i was only hearin' what i wanted to..

"JEM! get outta there!"

Jem was just standing there in the Radley yard! right next to the porch! i couldn't believe it.

"hush scout!"

"but Jem-"

Miss Maudie? Why i guess it wasn't boo Radley's house. But it looked just like his house. And that didn't explain why jem was waiting...who we're we waiting for again? Dill, maybe?

"Scout... its time..." miss Maudie was callin out from the Radley porch.

"Time for what Miss Maudie?"

"Miss Maudie, Scout?" maudie musta been closer than i thought she was.

"hmm... were you tryin to get a look at boo?"

"Scout.." someone was touching my shoulder, "its time to get up, hon."

The Scene of the Radley Yard was gone, along with Tom robinson, Miss Maudie, and Jem. All that i could see now was black.

The hand that was on my shoulder was not Miss Maudie's. It should have been Calpurnia's but it wasn't hers either. It was bigger. It was a mans hand.

"Atticus?"

"Yes Scout, now get up."

i opened my eyes slightly, and looked up. The sun was shinning though my window, and the glare from Atticus's glasses made squint my eyes shut again.

"Come on, baby, sit up."

I did what he told me and inched my way up first on my elbows, then my hands, Atticus's hand, still on my shoulder, guiding me up.

"Where's Cal?" i yawned, rubbing my eyes

Atticus sighed and walked over towards the window, and only when he reached it did he say, "She had a death in her family."

By this point, i had opened my eyes and was looking to my right up at my father who was looking at me, but not. It was like he was looking at my vague outline, not my eyes. I didn't like it.

"who died?" i asked after a while.

"her brother... you didn't know him." he said, looking me in the eyes again, which made me feel better.

"well, did you know 'em?"

Atticus sat down on the edge of my bed where my feet were now.

"Not too well. He worked on the janitorial staff at the courthouse. I said hello when i saw him.. thats all i knew of him."

I looked down at the blanket that was still over me. All the creases seemed to be headed in the same direction, towards Atticus.

"Well, how did-"

"ATTICUS," It was jem, yellin from down the hall. "I CAN'T FIND A SINGLE PRESSED SHIRT FOR- for school." he quieted his yelling when he reached my room.

Atticus looked down at his lap, then gave me a pat on my knee and got up and started walking towards jem at my door.

"Atticus," i said stopping him before he reached the doorway.

"What is it scout?" he asked, without facing me. Something he didn't normally do. I sensed something was wrong, but i choose not to bring it up.

"My dress isn't ready either."

He turned around towards my dresser next to the window. He took about three steps to reach it where it would normally take me 5 or 6 and opened the top drawer and pulled out a clean pair of underpants, one of my undershirts also clean and a slip for under my dress. He put these things on the foot of my bed, and then turned back around and then opened the middle drawer where he found all my overalls and shirts. He closed the middle drawer and opened the bottom drawer where he found three lonely dresses. One for church, One for Parties which was rarely used, unless aunt alexandra was having us over for christmas or easter dinner and one for school. Atticus took out the one for school and walked out of the room. Jem moved out of his way as he passed, and then followed him down the hall.

I got up and walked out of my room, and across the hall to the washroom. I turned on the cold faucet and let the water flow between my fingers, before splashing it on my face. I little of it got on my bangs and around the neck of my nightshirt in the process. I put my hands up to the running water again, this time catching it with my cupped hands. I brought the water to my mouth and swished it around a few times. then i spit it back into the sink.

i turned to go out of the room. I yawned and put my hands up to my face, which obscured my vision and allowed me to stub my toe on the old iron that held the door open.

"AHH! Oww!" i yelled as i fell into the wall opposite me. I had turned so that i wouldn't fall face first, and instead, my right side took the punishment of my carelessness.

"Scout?!" Atticus yelled as he walked speedily toward me. He never ran, he said he was too old and he would make a fool of himself. He found me sitting on my behind clutching my right arm.

"Scout, what in the world?" he kneeled down to my level, and put his hands on my shoulder.

"I.. tripped. I'm fine, Atticus... Are you in your Pajamas?" My father was almost always up and dressed by an ungodly 6:30 am. But there he was in his sleeping clothes Most covered by his robe, of course.

Atticus gave me a pat on my shoulder and pushed himself back up onto his feet by means of his bent knee.

"Yes Scout, Calpurnia needed to leave almost right after you went to bed. My clothes haven't been ironed either. " It was strange how the house kind of shut down when Cal wasn't here.

"Now go get as dressed as you can for the time being... and set the table please."

Atticus Ironing?Cooking!? i had to see this. I ran to my room this time being more cautious and put on my clean underthings, and my slipwhich itself was like a dress, i didn't understand why i had to wear two.

I ran down the hall and into the dining room where i found Jem in his shorts and his school shirt, apparently waiting for his pants.

"Jem, Come in here." Atticus called from the kitchen.

Jem got up and we both raced to the swinging door and even though i got there first, he did call for Jem so i let him go in first. We found Atticus, Still in his Pajamas and robe, over the ironing board he had placed there, opposite the stove, where two cast iron skillets were over separate flames and melting squares of sweet, sliding, cooking butter.

"Here, Jem." Atticus handed Jem his pants and told him to finish getting dressed and for me to set the table like he asked. His voice sounded exhausted. i wondered if he slept last night.

I tried to do as he asked me. I climbed up on the counter under the cabinet with the day-to-day dishes in it. We never used the good china that lived in a cabinet with glass doors in the dining room. I reached up and gabbed three plates. Unfortunately, the third plate caught on to a fourth and it went flying to the floor. Atticus came close to jumping, but i would more describe it as a.. surprised twitch. He turned around and looked at the broken plate on the floor.

"I'm Sorry Atticus!" i said putting the other three plates on the counter, which i was still kneeling on.

He took off his glasses and rubbed his brow. "Its fine Honey, just forget it." He put his glasses back on and looked at me and my bare feet. He cautiously walked over even though he was wearing his slippers i think it was to not make more little pieces.

He picked me up and brought me over to the door where he put me down, reached back over to the counter grabbed the plates and grabbed three forks and three knives from the drawer beneath them. He handed me the plates and cutlery and went over to the stove where he poured a yellowish mucus-like liquid into the skillet on the stove. He must have sensed i was still there.

"Tell your brother to come in here please."

I walked into the dining room and put the plates on the table in their normal places. Jem walked in a few moments later, his hair combed, his shoes tied, and fastening his belt.

"Atticus needs you in the kitchen." i said. Jem Nodded and walked through the adjoining door, and as he opened it i could smell bacon cooking and here the crackle of the fat on the stove.

i sat there at my seat in the dinning room. I heard Attcus talking to Jem, Telling him to "clean that up please". I knew he was talking about the plate. I felt somewhat guilty for having Jem clean up my mess. I used this time to run and put on my socks and shoes.

When i got back in the living room, Jem was waiting with my dress.

"Here scout, now get dressed."

The swinging door was being held open by another old iron, and i could not see Atticus through the door frame.

"Where's Atticus?" i asked i said taking my dress.

"He's in the washroom, scout, get dressed."

I ran to the nearest bedroom Atticus's and quickly slipped my dress over my head, struggling with the arm holes. Eventually i pulled it down in its place. It was still warm from the iron. Not to mention loose around the middle. I turned to leave when i found Atticus entering the room. He had on his shirt tucked in and his pants on attached to his suspenders which were normally hid by his vest. He looked down at me and then waked over to his closet.

"Breakfast is ready. Go on in, i'll be a moment." he said putting on his vest.

"I need help tyin and buttinin my dress... Cal always does it for me." i said looking at the back of his vest, which was softer than the front, and had a silky shine to it.

He walked over towards me, and opened the drawer of his nightstand , took out his most prized possession that was inscribed with a simple 'to Atticus, my beloved husband', and placed it on his bed. Then he kneeled down to my level, and told me to turn around. I could feel him buttoning the dress rather awkwardly. I remembered the time I fell into the creek once with my clothes on. Jem was with me and he helped me out. My shirt and overalls were soaked, so he let me borrow his shirt. I had a hard time with the buttons, because this was the first time i realized that mens shirts or boys shirts in jem's case button different than girls blouses. I remembered feeling embarrassed walking home in just a shirt and underwear. But Jem reassured me that it looked so big on me it looked like a dress. Which didn't bring the comfort i think he was trying to give.

"do you want a bow?" he asked taking both pieces of the ribbon-like fabric.

"I guess." I didn't want a bow. I didn't want a dress.

He tied the bow and stood up.

"Go on in and eat your breakfast before it cools."

I ran out of his room and into the dinning room where i found Jem already sitting and eating his breakfast. Bacon and Eggs. I found out later it was one of the few things Atticus could make himself. It surprisingly wasn't bad although the eggs were somewhat dry. Atticus came i moments later, completely dressed aside for his jacket which he flung over his shoulder.

I felt guilty about having started my breakfast before Atticus was even at the table. We were always taught to wait until everyone was served before starting. I could tell Jem felt guilty too because he stopped shoveling his breakfast when our father walked in.

Atticus put his jacket on the back of his chair and sat down. Normalcy was reinstated. Somewhat. He served himself and started to eat without saying a word to us.

There was silence. We didn't talk much and breakfast, but i can't ever remember the table ever being this silent. I prayed someone would break the silence. And i prayed it wouldn't have to be me. Atticus coughed into his napkin, then held in clenched in his hand on the table.

"Cal, could-" he stopped himself when he realized his mistake. It was very queer not having Cal around the house. It took me about as long as Atticus to realize. How quickly we forget.

"Do you need something, Atticus?" Jem spoke up, but quietly.

"Nothing Jem... I think you and Scout better finish up," he said taking out his pocket watch to glance at briefly. "Its almost time for school."

We took our last bites of crunchy bacon, and our last sips of cool milk, and we grabbed our books we had thrown in the corner of the room. After Jem scooped his up he ran out of the room. I almost did the same, and then i remembered. I ran up to Atticus, and gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek. He only half hugged me back.

"bye." i said to him and ran towards the door.

"Good bye, scout." i heard faintly as i entered the kitchen.

I ran out the kitchen and tried to catch up with Jem.

"Jem Wait up!" i sort of yelled. He stopped briefly.

"Well, come on now scout!" he yelled back waiting impatiently, motioning me forward with his hand.

"I'm commin'" i said as i caught up with him.

"What do you think is wrong with Atticus?" i asked expecting back a ' your too young, scout' or a 'i'll explain it later, scout'. But i received an answer i didn't expect.

"I don't know, scout." This was a first. Even if he didn't know the answer i suspected he would say one of his excuses anyway. "You think its about Cals brother?" he asked me.

"i.. don't think so.. Atticus said he didn't know em too well.." i said trying to recall the fuzzy events of the morning.

Jem didn't say anything else. Neither did I.

We walked to class in silence, lost in our thoughts.