#6: Savin' Me
Songfic time! I was listening to Nickelback today and thought this song connected quite well with Jack… and here it is. The song is "Savin' Me" from the album "All The Right Reasons". Oh, and this is pre-Utopia.
Disclaimer: Doctor Who not mine, Torchwood not mine, Nickelback not mine, Jack Harkness not mine. I think that covers it.
#6: Savin' Me
Prison gates won't open up for me
On these hands and knees I'm crawlin'
Oh, I reach for you
Well I'm terrified of these four walls
These iron bars can't hold my soul in
All I need is you
Come please I'm callin'
And oh I scream for you
Hurry I'm fallin', I'm fallin'
A hundred years, waiting. I've spent every waking moment wishing that I'd find him again, that he'd come back. And the nightmares, where I'm trapped somewhere, where I'm close to him but can never quite reach him.
When I started having that nightmare, I would wake up screaming. Crying his name – and sometimes her name – as if I could call them back just by saying their names. But I can't. She's dead and he's gone, and I'm all alone.
Show me what it's like
To be the last one standing
And teach me wrong from right
And I'll show you what I can be
Say it for me
Say it to me
And I'll leave this life behind me
Say it if it's worth saving me
A hundred years. I've seen so much… and I've lost so many friends. Every time I get close to someone… I watch them get older, and die, and all the time I still look the same as I did when I met them. And that's true of almost everyone I know.
Except him. He knows what it's like to be the last one left. The only one left. I don't know how he copes with it… if I find him again, I'll ask him how he does it. Assuming that he wants anything to do with me, of course.
Heaven's gates won't open up for me
With these broken wings I'm fallin'
And all I see is you
These city walls ain't got no love for me
I'm on the ledge of the eighteenth story
And oh I scream for you
Come please I'm callin'
And all I need from you
Hurry I'm fallin', I'm fallin'
The nightmares haven't come for years now. No, now I just see him. Every dream, every time I close my eyes, all I see is him. Sometimes I think I actually preferred the nightmares. Seeing him all the time hurts more than any nightmare ever could. When it gets too much I go out, into the city. Find a rooftop somewhere and just stand for a while. Watching the city from up there… it's calming. It reminds me that I have a purpose now.
All I need is you
Come please I'm callin'
And oh, I scream for you
Hurry I'm fallin', I'm fallin', I'm fallin'
But I need to see him again. I can pretend that I'm okay, and get on with my life, but it doesn't make the longing, the need, go away. If I don't find him soon, I don't know what will happen.