All my thanks to my faithful readers/reviewers, and to any new people, HI! So here is the next chapter, and you had to know that what you will read was coming. (You'll see)

Disclaimer: I don't own anything related to Mass Effect. And if I did, why would I write this story?

Chapter 6:

They Don't Train For This

Joker crouched behind the crate; his hands were shaking as he gripped his new pistol. Jesus, this is crazy. But I ain't got a choice. Joker waited, as heavy metallic footsteps grew louder as the geth stalker got closer. The pilot gulped in a steadying breath, and slid across the metallic floor out from his hiding place. The stalker hesitated to register this new situation, and that was Joker needed. Fifteen shots rang out in quick succession and landed into the flashlight head of their target. Bingo. Relieved, Joker stood over his fallen enemy in victory.

"Simulation complete. Calculating grade…calculations complete. The grade received is an A."

"Booyah!" shouted Joker, raising his pistol into the air.

"Yeah, yeah," rumbled Wrex from the simulation computer. "Next time, I'll raise the difficulty."

"Bring it on big man," challenged the pilot.

"Enough," came Laura's voice from the elevator as the doors opened. "Somebody needs to pilot this ship to wherever I want to go," she said in a mock pout.

"Commander," said Ashley, looking up from her rifle maintenance. "You should be happy that Joker could complete up to level ten in only his second day of walking."

"Yes, his accuracy is quite impressive despite his lack of training," assessed Garrus. "In fact, I bet he could come out on a mission with us."

Joker raised an eyebrow, and looked towards his Commander. Currently, Laura's right thumb and finger supported her chin while her left arm supported her right elbow. "Perhaps, but it will have to be on a planet where we can actually dock and not one of those missions that Hackett keeps giving us."

"I'd be honored ma'am"

Wrex snorted, and shut down the simulation computer. Finished, Joker accompanied Shepard to the elevator. As Laura hit the button for the second level, Joker leaned against the sidewall rail and waited for the slow ascension to begin. "Damn elevator," mumbled Joker, kicking at the floor.

"Oh, don't know, there are some uses for a slow elevator," said Laura.

"Obviously not to get anywhere quickly."

"No, definitely not. However, it can be useful to clear your thoughts amongst other things," she said, sitting next to him.

"Such as?" Joker queried, as the elevator slowly stopped.

"This," she replied, quickly planting a kiss on her pilot's face as the doors opened.

Thoroughly shocked, Joker sat dumbfounded against the elevator wall as Laura scampered away to other parts of the ship. Wow.

Wow? How about hell yeah?

Right! Hell Yeah!

Joker took a deep breath and stepped out from the elevator. After quickly ascending the stairs to the top level, Joker settled into his chair and warmed up the Normandy. With all systems in working order, Laura arrived to request her next location. "And the winner is?" queried the pilot.

"The winning planet is Noveria. We've had reports that Matriarch Benezia has been spotted on that planet," replied Laura.

"I've heard that uh, shady things happen there. All in the name of, you know, good business," said Joker with a shrug.

"Luckily, I don't have to put up with their bullshit," stated Laura, crossing her arms. "Spectres don't have to put up with all their military red tape."

"So Commander," began Joker. "Can I really come along?"

"Come along?" queried Laura. "No. You can participate, and you can take part in this mission, but you can't 'come along' like an observer. But yes, you will be accompanying me and Liara."

"Liara? Because Benezia is her mother?"

"She wants to come, and yes, I believe she should."

"Okay Commander, I'll contact you and Liara in about…seventeen hours," said Joker as he examined his console, and plotted the course.

"Seventeen hours? You have to stay in that chair for seventeen hours?" Laura asked incredulously.

"Well Commander, as you know, most of our trips were considerably short, and getting anywhere used to take almost as long as the trip itself," explained Joker. "But what will you do Commander? Dream about your sexy pilot, and giving more kisses in the elevator?"

"If you weren't so close to being right Joker, I would have had your ass," teased Laura.

Joker finished with his console and stood from his chair, "Close Commander?"

Laura looked behind her left shoulder, and then her right to make sure nobody was listening in. She leaned in, and whispered into Joker's ear, "Why dream, when you can actually do it?" Laura pulled away, and winked at her pilot. She then turned around and sauntered away from the cockpit.

As Joker watched her go, he smiled triumphantly. Why aren't you following her?

Give her some space, you know, I don't want to crowd her like a dog begging for attention.

When did you get so smooth?

Beats me.

You got ten seconds before I mentally kick your ass.

That makes no sense.

Neither does standing around as the Commander gets away.

Right, leaving now.

You better.

Joker swiftly hit the autopilot button and threw his hat in his chair. The pilot got down the stairs in time to hear Laura's conversation with Kaidan. "You plan on taking Liara?" asked the Lieutenant.

"Yes actually. Why Kaidan? Do you have an interest in her?" Laura queried back.

"She's cute, if you like the bookish type," responded Alenko, rubbing the back of his neck nervously.

"And do you?"

Kaidan visibly blushed under the orange lights, "Yeah, I do. What about you and Joker?"

"I'm a Spectre," teased Laura. "That's classified."

Both Joker and Kaidan snorted, "Right Commander," said Alenko as he walked to the medical bay presumably to see Liara.

Laura turned from watching Kaidan leave, to the stairs, "You coming Joker?"

Embarrassed, Joker could only respond, "Yes ma'am."

The two settled into Laura's room in the dim light. "So what do you want to do for the next," Laura paused to check her watch. "Sixteen and a half hours?"

Joker ran a hand through his short brown hair and chuckled, "Something tells me the answer isn't make furious love to the pilot."

Laura pleased Joker's ears with her laugh, "As great as that would be, and trust me Joker, it will be great, but not now."

"Will be? I like the sound of that Commander," said Joker, leaning back in the chair.

"Calm your hormones flyboy."

"Flyboy? I haven't been called that since my first day out of flight school. So what do you want to do?" continued Joker.

"I thought I would really annoy you and play cards. You know, that whole Joker thing," said Laura nonchalantly.

"Got a particular game in mind?" asked the pilot, brushing off the cliché joke.

"Damn, thought that would get you," Laura replied with a fake frown. "How about fifty two pickup?" said the Commander, tossing the pile in Joker's face.

The pilot laughed heartily as he caught a large portion of tee ck and threw it back at his Commander. "I'm under attack!"

The two continued the shameless flirting game, until they were both red in the face and out of breath. The bombardments ended the two began cleaning up the cards strewn about the room. Joker had his hands on two cards that were on the floor, when Laura's hands grasped the cards as well. Joker looked up at Laura and smiled at his Commander, causing her to blush. Joker took Shepard's hand in his other, and kissed each of her delicate but strong fingers. Soft, strong, and tasty.

Both Joker and Shepard pulled each other closer, and dropped the two cards they held. Joker slowly met his lips with Laura's and enjoyed his first real kiss with Commander Laura Shepard. The two slowly pulled away must to each other's dissatisfaction. Laura spoke first, "Wow. Uh…that was amazing. And as much as I would like to stay, I have other things to attend to."

"Damn other things," muttered Joker. "Well I should let you get to it." Joker picked up the two cards and slowly rose to his feet. Joker looked at the two cards, and could not help but laugh. "I think I'll keep this one, and you can keep the other," said Joker as he tucked one card into his breast pocket, and placed the other on the table. Joker chuckled as he walked out the sliding door, leaving Shepard to watch him leave with an eyebrow arched.

As Shepard made her rounds around the Normandy, Joker returned to his chair in the cockpit still laughing. It was not until later that Laura once again came to the cockpit to seek refuge in Joker's company. As she settled into the copilot's chair, Laura took out the card that Joker had left her from her breast pocket. "Care to explain?" she inquired playfully.

"It's very simple," explained Joker. "What is you card?"

"The joker card," stated Laura, showing her pilot the card. "And yours?"

"A queen," he responded. "Queen of Hearts to be exact."

"I think I'm starting to get the picture," hesitated Shepard.

"Let me help you Commander," said Joker turning to Laura. "Your card is me, and mine is you. I plan on keeping this card in my shirt pocket over my heart for the sole purpose of being cliché."

"That's sweet," said Laura, as she kissed Joker before she left the cockpit.

"You know Commander, we still have another five hours left. We could-"

"In your dreams Joker," said Shepard over her shoulder, waving her hand.

Damn.

Relax, you got the girl.

So true.

Mental high five!

All right, focus on what's next. You are actually going to have to go out on Noveria and fight.

Right. Crap.

So chapter 6 is out, and i didn't think i could get an entire chapter out without getting to another planet. Hoped you loved it, and even if you didn't let me know by reviewing!