A/N: I can't exactly figure out how to describe this chapter to you. It's slightly leaning towards Cam/Wilson right now. I'm not sure how far I'm letting that one ride out though. I came up with this chapter after having minimal sleep for 2 days, so forgive me if it shows. I rather like this chapter though. Someone said that it is simply irritating and makes fics suck when writers give their characters Eating Disorders or make them Self Injure. I believe that it doesn't. I believe that this fic gets a lot out of me that's been insidefor a long time. I'd like your opinions on sucky or not as far as giving them angstful things to do. Thanks as always for reading. I'm open to suggestion as to where people would like to see this go.

Cameron paced the floor of her apartment after having kicked House out. How could he manage to say the most aweful things at exactly the wrong time?

"He Knows!" Cameron thought "I'm transparent, dirty, weak. He can see what happened...what I let happen. Everyone will always see it on me. Dirty...worthless...slut..."

All of a sudden, the mental noise stoped. Cmaeron was no longer mentally berating herself. A warm sensation brought her out of her stunned reverie. As she drifted into reality she saw it. There was blood falling from her arms and legs; a razorblade was in her right hand.

"Oh god.." she moaned quietly.

It had been at least ten years since she had been this out of control. There was such a helpless feeling that accompanied the blood raining into the sink. It had been as if she'd blacked out. While she had been mentally attacking herself, Allison's body went on auto-pilot. The only way to stop the raging mental storm had been to inflict physical pain. While she stared at the hypnotic blood flow, Cameron mused over the fact that it had been many many year since she had allowed herself such a breakdown. As a doctor she should have known from her psych rotation that it was bound to come up eventually. There is only so long you can supress things before they come to the surface...in one way or another.

Allison staunched the blood flow and examined the wounds. Four of them would need a few stitches. She chose to bandage them tonight and wait until tomorow to seek out Wilson's help. No matter how alone she felt, Wilson was always there.

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At least once a week, Cameron and Wilson got together at her home to watch movies and just hang out. Neither would consider this dating. It was simply two friends having a good time togehter.

As Cameron had pointed out a few weeks previous "If this is dating, you and House have been going steady for over twenty years"

Wilson had looked thoughtful at this and given her a grin, "Don't ruin this by making me feel like I'm cheating on House!"

One night, they had been stretched out on the couch. They had just finished watching Donnie Darko. Cameron had been in a thougful reverie trying to figure if this movie had truly sucked or if it had deeper meaning. She was stunned when Wilson had spoke.

"Ally?"

She sat up to look at him "Yeah James?"

"What's Wrong? Please, don't lie to me. I know something's going on with you."

All Allison had thought to do was cuddle up next to him and simply reply "No..I'm ok."

Wilson had never brought anything serious up to her again. He had grown accustomed to her scars. At home, Cameron was comfortable. She wore tank tops that exposed the white scars on her upper arms. He never asked her to explain and she never offered. She showed him she trusted him solely by allowing him to see those scars. They had been such a private thing to her for so long. The only people she allowed into her world had been her husband, and now Wilson. There had been others that saw the scars, but none that she had purposefuly allowed to see them.

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Cameron slept fitfully that night occasionaly debating calling Wilson. Her arm throbbed and she took several Ibuprofen. It was a night from Hell. When she woke from her few moments of sleep she felt like a zombie. She staggered to the bathroom and looked in the mirror to confirm that not only did she look like the walking dead, but she could also portray them in a horror movie. She applied her make up and sought to pull off something resembling "normal".

Once dressed, Cameron dialed Wilson.

One ring - "What should I say to him? What's he going to say to me?" She thought.

Two rings - her thought process was cut into by Wlison answering his phone.

"Hello?"

"Hi James. It's Allison"

"Oh! Good morning. What's up?" He responded trying to think why Allison was calling him before work. It had never been uncommon for her to call him after work to get a drink. But, why before? Something had to be wrong.

"Could you meet me in the clinic in a half hour? I need a medical favor." She said sweetly to him.

"Consult?" Wilson was in full doctor mode now.

"Not really. Just be there?" There was a tiny bit of pleading in her voice. She needed him to be there for more than the medical reasons...she needed her friend.

"Ok Ally. See you there." His voice was reassuring letting her know that indeed her friend would be there to help no matter what the problem.

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Twenty minutes later Cameron paced the clinic. To her, pacing was an easy way to burn calories and clear her mind. The former wasn't strictly neccessary, but she did indeed need to straighten out in her mind what to tell Wilson and what to keep hidden.

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Wilson pulled up to the hospital with a lot on his mind.

"What could Cameron want from me?" he pondered. Then he recalled the scars on her arms. "Oh no...she couldnt have. Not again. Those were old. At least ten years old. No, that can't be why. Perhaps she needs someone to draw blood for a test. What type of test though?"

His mind raced with all the different possibilities. As he entered the clinic he saw Cameron pacing with a look of concern and confusion on her face. Apparently he wasn't the only one deep in thought over this.

He approached her nervously. "Cameron?"

"Oh wilson. You're here" She tried to play it off nonchalantly. She still hadn't figured out what to tell him.

Cameron directed him to Exam Room Three. She locked the door and closed the blinds.

It was official, Wilson was beyond confused. Did Cameron want him to play doctor and help her, or did she want the two of them to play doctor together?

"So, what's going on here?" He asked trying to get a feel for the situation.

"Umm...I need your help. But...please, don't ask any questions. I'm not going to answer them. Not here and not now. At least...maybe later. I'm not sure. But please, just don't ask me to explain them to you?" She was babbling with fear.

"Ally, calm down. I'll help you whatever it is, and, you only have to tell me what's strictly medically neccessary. Ok?"

Cameron was visibly shaking. She couldnt' remember when she got reduced to an angst ridden teenager sitting in a doctor's office praying he didn't say the wrong thing. When had she allowed her life to get this far out of control?

"I never dealt with it" She silently admitted to herself. She knew that she needed to confront her past...just now was not an option to do it.

Her eyes filled with tears as she slipped her arms out of her sweatshirt.

Wilson stifled a gasp when he saw the damage she had inflicted on herself. He had to approach this from a clinical perspective. There were several cuts in need of stitches and the rest of them could stand to be cleaned and bandaged. He sighed deeply before saying anything.

"Ok Cameron. We'll need to get these sorted out pretty soon then. You may need to call in and tell them you'll be late into work." He mentally kicked himself for reverting to addressing her by her last name. She needed comfort right now, not some cold clinical approach.

Cameron did as told retrieving her cell phone from her bag and placing a quick call into the diagnostics lounge.

"James...I..." she began

"Allison, you don't have to explain it to me." he said with a tinge of sadness in his voice. "I'm not going to tell anyone what you did, don't worry."

"And when you want to talk...you know where I am..." he silently added to himself.