Brokenhearted
Chapter 2: Truth And Bitter Tears
He knocked on her door as soon as he had ascended the stairs. He waited patiently for her to open it but he was not prepared for the shock of the site that met him. She was pale and her face was streaked with tears. He reached a hand out to her but she withdrew into the apartment, allowing him to follow but keeping her distance from him. She sat on the couch and he sat beside her, keeping a full cushion between them. He noticed her gun lying on the coffee table "Liv," he whispered.
"I'm sorry," she responded "I just. He… and I couldn't…" she had to tell someone. She had to report it or he would hurt someone else. Now that Elliot was in the apartment with her, it didn't make what she had to do any easier.
"No, no," Elliot reassured softly "Don't apologize to me for anything," he reached out to take her hand but she folded her hands in her lap and shrank further into the couch "It was a boring night at home anyway," he joked, not wanting to tell her about the encounter in the parking garage only minutes before.
She turned to look at him and he saw that there was something in her gaze, a heartache that she had been trying to hide, for how long he wasn't sure but he could guess from what he knew so far that she had been trying to bury it since last night. Tears made fresh tracks down her cheeks. She knew she had to tell him. Just three simple words but God they were so hard to say. She took a deep breath "I was raped," after that statement, she collapsed to the couch, trying to stifle sobs that wracked her form.
"Shh," Elliot laid a hand carefully on her back and when she didn't shy away from it he rubbed slowly "It's okay," he whispered "It's gonna be okay," he picked her up in his arms and held her. He placed a finger under her chin and brought her gaze to meet his "I promise that we'll get the guy who did this."
"I'm sorry," she tore her gaze away instantly and tried to pull out of his arms "I should have been able to stop him," she couldn't stand this. She couldn't take it. She was a cop. This wasn't supposed to happen to her "I just… he was too strong and… I tried but…"
"Olivia," Elliot softly commanded her attention "Look at me." Reluctantly, her watery eyes found his. Elliot spoke firmly but gently at the same time "Listen to me. This is not your fault. You know that better than anyone."
"But-"
Olivia began to object but Elliot placed a finger over her lips "No," he told her. He was having a hard time keeping back his own tears. It broke his heart to see her this way and he knew that when he found the person who had done this to her, it would take half the NYPD to protect that slime from him. "You didn't ask for this," he fought the urge to just hold her to him.
"I stopped," she whispered "I stopped struggling after only a few minutes," the fact that she had given up the fight was almost as humiliating as the rape itself.
Elliot felt tears begin to burn his own eyes but he didn't make any attempt to hide them. He wouldn't look away from her; he didn't want to send the signal that anything that happened was her fault or that she should feel ashamed. He kept his gaze focused solely on her, reassuring her that he didn't think any less of her. He nearly choked on his next words "That probably saved your life," he whispered as a tear fell from his eye. He wished that she had told him about this when it happened. He wished he could have been there for her. He wanted to find the guy who did this and strangle him.
"I should probably give my formal statement down at the station," she sniffled as she ran the back of her hand across her eyes, trying to erase the evidence that she had been crying although from who she wasn't sure "I just wanted to let you know first so… I didn't want it to shock you too much," she looked away from him.
"Thank you for telling me," he told her with a hand on her shoulder "I'll drive you to the station," he whispered, knowing that the guy was still out there and worse, he had been at her building that very night. He wasn't going to let anything else happen to her if he could help it.
"There's something else," she admitted softly.
Elliot was afraid to ask. What more could have possibly happened to her? He removed his hand from her shoulder and instead wrapped his arm around her "Did something else happen?" he asked nervously.
She reached for the answering machine and skipped to the last message. She didn't want to hear it again and when she saw Elliot's reaction to it, she knew he didn't want to hear it at all. She took a deep shuddering breath and stood to her feet "Okay, let's go," she said hesitantly.
"Oh God," Elliot whispered. He stood with her and held her close "Oh my God," he didn't dare leave the apartment now without CSU already in the parking garage looking for evidence and the entire building surrounded by cops. The guy had been right there. He had been inches away from Elliot and he had gotten away. Not only that but he was threatening to come back. Elliot knew that the ones who threatened to come back rarely did but he had been in the garage and been witness to the fact that this one had indeed come back. He eased Olivia back to the couch "I'm gonna call the captain," he said, hoping that she wouldn't press him for the reason.
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Casey flipped through the TV channels, finally settling on Conan O'Brien before leaning back on the couch. She took a long sip from the glass of wine in her hand before setting it back on the coffee table. She was trying to forget about work with no success. Mill was calling Elliot as a witness and Casey knew that Mill had some sort of devious plan to get his client off. She hated Mill.
A knock on her apartment door snapped her attention away from the TV. She stood up and walked to the door. She peered through the peephole but couldn't see anything "Who is it?" she asked.
"Your next door neighbor," a raspy voice answered.
Casey didn't know her neighbors all that well but she didn't think that this voice sounded like any of them. Still she couldn't be sure. She opened the door and looked out into the hallway. Before she could react, she was shoved back inside her apartment. She landed on her back and stared up at her assailant. He was tall and wore a ski mask. "What the hell," she said loudly.
The man pulled out a gun "Now, now councilor," he taunted as he bent down and knelt on top of her "I suggest you be quiet. I wouldn't want to have to put a bullet through that pretty little head of yours."
Casey froze as the man pinned her beneath his weight "No," she whispered.
"Oh yes," the man responded. Through the ski mask, Casey could see a horrifying smile of satisfaction on the man's face "I'm gonna enjoy this," he told her.
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Olivia stood behind Elliot, half hidden by his left shoulder as they walked to his car. She couldn't help feeling uneasy walking through the parking garage again but looking around she felt slightly better. The place was swarming with cops. CSU detectives were dusting for fingerprints although since it was a parking garage, there were bound to be a lot of fingerprints. Uniformed officers were canvassing the area looking for any sign of the man that Elliot had described: About six feet, gray sweats and a ski mask. Not a whole lot to go on but it was something.
Elliot opened the passenger side door of his car for Olivia. He saw how she was glancing fitfully in all directions and he placed a hand on her arm as he reassured her "He's not gonna get near you again."
"You can't be sure," she slid in to the car and fastened the seatbelt "He got close to you didn't he?"
Elliot had been forced to explain about his encounter in the garage while Olivia was standing right next to him and she was angry that he hadn't told her. In her mind, the special treatment had already begun. Elliot got in and started the car "It wasn't important," he protested.
"Not important?!" she was incredulous "Elliot he could have killed you! He knew you were there to see me! He knows that you're my partner! And to you, that's 'not important'?!"
"I didn't want to worry you," he mumbled.
"Too late," she countered at a more normal volume although her tone was still angry. She was worried. She couldn't stand it if Elliot died. She knew she couldn't get through this without him. She wasn't entirely sure that she could get through this with him but she knew that she would never make it without him.
"Look," he began "I was just… You don't need to…" nothing sounded right in his own mind. She was his partner and best friend. There was no excuse for keeping something from her, even if it had to do with her own rape case. She never liked it when he kept things from her and she always found out eventually, like tonight "I'm sorry," he said finally. He caught a glimpse of her in the rearview mirror and saw that there were fresh tears on her cheeks "Liv?" he asked, worriedly.
"Just…" she began "just… ask me first the next time you decide to almost get your head blown off," she tried to make light of the heavy, raging emotions in her heart at that moment.
"Deal," he agreed softly. Suddenly it occurred to him to ask a question that he hadn't asked earlier. The question was very uncomfortable but he knew he needed to ask for the sake of the case "Liv… last night… did you… I mean afterwards… did you go to the hospital?"
"Yeah," she answered softly, staring at her lap "Mercy General. They have the kit there."
"Munch and Fin can go pick it up and run it over to the lab," he told her as he pulled out his phone. He talked to Munch for a few minutes before hanging up. He turned to Olivia with a grave look on his face just as they pulled up in front of the precinct "They'll pick it up but it's gonna be a while," he told her, trying to stall for time. He knew she didn't want him to keep things from her but he really wished he could get away with not telling her this. But it was something that she would find out one way or another and it was better if she found out from him.
"What happened?" she picked up instantly on the fact that he was stalling and trying to keep something from her.
Elliot opened his door and stepped out "Let's head inside first," he wanted to delay the inevitable just a little longer.
Olivia got out and came around to his side of the car "Elliot," she whispered as she shivered from the night air "Tell me what happened," her voice was firm.
Elliot started to walk inside the precinct "I'll tell you," he said "I just want to get inside first."
Olivia shrugged and followed him inside. They walked up to the squad room. Olivia headed for her desk but Elliot steered her in the direction of an interview room "Elliot," she protested.
He opened the door and motioned to one of the chairs "You're gonna want to be sitting down for this," he told her uneasily.
Olivia felt the knot in her stomach that had been there for a long time now grow even tighter. She nodded numbly and took a seat. She folded her hands on the table in front of her and looked up at Elliot as he took a seat across from her "What happened?" she repeated her earlier question.
Elliot took a deep breath "There was another attack."
"Oh my God," Olivia whispered. She was overcome with guilt "I should have reported it sooner."
"No," Elliot knew that she was blaming herself and he was doing everything he could to keep that from happening "This wasn't your fault Olivia."
"If I had said something," she suddenly found staring at her joined hands to be quite interesting "Who was the victim?" she asked.
"That's not important," Elliot tried to dismiss her question. This too would be something she would find out in time but if he could at least give her a few hours of bliss before it hit.
"It is to me," she countered "Tell me please?"
Elliot took a deep breath. He didn't want to be the barer of this news but he had very little choice. He could keep quiet and then Olivia would just read about it in the paper or hear about it from someone else. This case too would be highly publicized "Casey."
Olivia stood shakily to her feet "How could you not think that was important?" Elliot had to rush around to the other side of the table to steady Olivia when she nearly fell over "She's our friend Elliot," Olivia half sobbed half screamed.
"I know," Elliot held Olivia in his arms "I know but Liv, you need to be thinking about yourself right now and let the rest of us do the worrying about both you and Casey."
"Is she at least okay?" Olivia silently conceded knowing that Elliot was right but not wanting to admit it out loud.
Elliot took another deep breath "A security camera outside her building caught a guy in gray sweats and a ski mask," he pulled Olivia into a hug and ran his hand up and down her back as he sunk into the chair. This news had broken him as well and there was only so long that he could remain strong. He just hoped he could hold out a bit longer.
"That doesn't answer my question Elliot," Olivia's voice was muffled by Elliot's shoulder "Is she okay?"
"She's in a coma," Elliot answered as he lost his grip, holding onto Olivia for all he was worth.
"Oh God," Olivia whispered. She and Elliot cried in each other's embrace for an hour. This perp was escalating.
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Munch and Fin walked into Melinda Warner's office "Two rape kits," Munch said flatly, placing the items on Warner's desk.
Warner gave the two detectives a sad and knowing smile "I'll make this my top priority," she told them.
"Thanks," Fin muttered. He turned and left the room followed closely by his partner.
Warner watched them leave before turning her attention to the rape kits that they had delivered. She had never seen Munch and Fin so devoid of personality but she understood why.
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"I can't believe this is all happening," Olivia sat across from Elliot once again, running her finger around the rim of a paper cup of water "It just doesn't seem real."
Elliot nodded. He was feeling the same exact way "Are you sure you want to do this now?" he asked.
"The sooner the better remember," she smirked slightly "Get the details while they're still fresh in the victim's mind."
"Are you sure you want me to take your statement?" he asked. He would if she truly wanted him to but he wasn't sure and if she would rather give her statement to someone else he would understand. In fact, he would more than understand, he would be down right grateful not to have to know every last detail but he would do it if she wanted him to.
"No, its fine," she said noncommittally "I just want to get this over with."
"Okay," Elliot took out a pen and a notepad "Let me know if you need to stop."
"Elliot," she said sternly "I know the drill, okay?"
"Yeah, sorry," he muttered.
"Would it be easier for you if I gave my statement to someone else?" she asked.
"What?" he looked up from the pad of paper.
"Its just," she propped her cheek against her hand and stared her partner down as if nothing was out of the ordinary "You seem like you'd rather be anywhere else right now."
Elliot set his pen down and looked directly at Olivia "Well maybe a little but Olivia, this has nothing to do with me. If you feel more comfortable having me take your statement then I'm gonna take your statement."
"I'd rather not give it at all," Olivia muttered but she knew she couldn't do that. She thought about poor Casey and any other women that this bastard might victimize in the future. He was escalating and the next person who ran into him might not be lucky enough to be in a coma.
Elliot leaned forward and reached a hand across the table to Olivia who readily took it "Whenever you're ready," he whispered.
Olivia gave Elliot a barely noticeable smile before she took a deep breath. She shut her eyes against the memories "I pulled into the parking garage last night at around 1:30am."
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She parked her car and stepped out. Her mind was perhaps too focused on her upcoming testimony that she didn't hear the man sneak up from behind her. All she could think about were those two little kids. The next thing she knew, there was a hand over her mouth and another around her waist. Her first instinct was to fight back. She struck out with one arm but hit nothing. The next thing she knew, her face was pressed into the far wall of the parking garage. She could feel the barrel of a gun pressed firmly into the base of her skull.
"Do what I say," a low, raspy, almost inhuman voice told her "I wouldn't want to have to put a bullet in that pretty little head of yours."
Olivia's mind raced. She had to get out of this somehow. With one hand she reached back and tried to push him off balance but it didn't work. She heard him curse and cock the hammer of the gun. She shut her eyes tight, preparing for her death. She knew she had caused it. Instead the man simply pistol whipped her across the back before returning the barrel of the gun to the base of her skull.
"I'm not gonna warn you again bitch," he hissed, pressing his full weight against her. His free hand moved to the button of her jeans and he pushed them down in one fluid motion. Her panties soon joined her jeans around her ankles.
As he moved inside her, she had the thought that it would be much better to be dead than to be living through this nightmare.
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Olivia stopped, withdrawing her hand from Elliot's and looking down "I should have been able to stop him," she whispered as tears burned her eyes.
Elliot quickly finished taking his notes and crossed to the other side of the room. He knelt beside her chair and took her hand into his once again "Liv," he softly commanded her attention. When she looked at him he continued "You aren't super woman. You did all you could have done in that situation," he couldn't believe how close he had come to losing her and the thought made tears come to his own eyes "You survived."
"Yeah," Olivia said bitterly "Do you know how hollow all of those words sound from the other side of the 'situation'?" she collapsed off the chair and into Elliot's waiting embrace.
"I'm so sorry," Elliot whispered into her hair. He felt guilty that he wasn't there to stop this from happening to her "I wish…" he trailed off.
"Yeah," Olivia murmured "I know," what had happened had happened and now she had to deal with it.
They sat together like that for some time before they finally pulled apart. Elliot cleared his throat "Do you want me to take you home?" he didn't like the idea of her going back to her apartment with that guy still out there and having threatened to come back for her.
Olivia cleared her throat and wiped her eyes. If she stayed at the station, that bastard would have gotten her to back down. There was no choice in her mind "Yeah," she said softly, standing to her feet.
"You're sure?" Elliot asked, hoping that she would change her mind.
She seriously considered changing her mind at that moment but she just couldn't do it "If I let him control my life," she told Elliot "He wins. I'm not gonna let that happen."
"This isn't about winning Olivia," Elliot tried to keep the frustration he was feeling out of his tone "It's never about winning."
"It's always about winning," she walked out of the interview room and waited for him to follow. She had to regain herself, no matter what had happened to her, she wouldn't let her rape define who she was. Of course that was easier said than done.
The ride back to her building was quiet, Neither one said so much as a word until Elliot parked on the street in front of the building; the garage had long since been vacated by the CSU team and Elliot didn't really want to go back in there. He was just as shaken by this guy as Olivia was. He walked her up to her apartment and went inside with her. Then and only then did he break the silence "Are you going to be all right?"
She nodded. Then she noticed the light on her answering machine flashing. She had a new message. She pointed to the machine "Elliot," she said softly.
Elliot walked over to the machine and pushed the button as soon as the voice on the tape began, he felt a chill run down his spine. He reached for Olivia and pulled her onto the couch with him. He held her close "It's gonna be okay," he whispered over and over again to reassure himself as well as her.
"It's sweet how your partner takes care of you," the man didn't even bother with a greeting "Just remember, he can't protect you all the time."
Like hell I can't, Elliot thought angrily.
"I wonder," the man mused "What would you do without him Olivia? What do you say we find out huh?"
No! Olivia thought frantically as her grip on Elliot increased noticeably.
"Oh," the man added as if he had just thought of something "If Casey ever wakes up again, tell her I say hi."
Both Elliot and Olivia shivered at this. The man was openly taking responsibility for the attack on Casey. Elliot pulled out his cell phone "I'm gonna call TARU and have them analyze this," he said.
Olivia nodded "Good idea."
The message was still playing "I'll be seeing both of you sooner than you think. Bye."