Chapter 1

Marcus awoke in his chair on the bridge of the White Star with a shout. "It was only a nightmare," he thought for a moment. Then, the events of the past week came crashing down on him.

He wished the events in the dream weren't true, but they were all too real. They had won the battle against the Earth cruisers that were supplemented with Shadow technology, but the cost of that victory had been high. Many ships were destroyed including the one Susan and Marcus were on. Marcus had saved Susan by carrying her to an escape pod, but his efforts would only buy her a week, maybe ten days. Susan had suffered head trauma and massive internal injuries. The doctors tried, but there was nothing they could do.

The cuts and bruises that he suffered were fading, but that didn't matter because he could not feel them. The only thing Marcus felt was a bone-deep exhaustion. He constantly felt tired and cold as if he had aged a hundred years in less than a week.

In the medical bay, preparations were going on to send Susan to Babylon Five. The healers and doctors said there was nothing that they could do. Their defeatist attitude sickened and enraged Marcus. If they couldn't find a way to save her, he would. She was too strong and too important for him to let die. Like in the model he made for her, she was the center of his life, and he could not live without her.

Delenn and John were visiting Susan to thank her for her sacrifice and to say goodbye. Marcus had come too, but the thought of their impending separation was tearing him apart. He wished that he believed in souls and Heaven so they could be together in the afterlife, but they were fairy tales that made people feel better about death. This would be their final separation, unless a miracle occurred.

Delenn and John left, but Marcus lingered for a moment longer. He couldn't bring himself to say goodbye. He remembered how they worked together to find the First Ones during the Shadow War. They were like ants to the First Ones, but they managed to recruit them to their side and turn the tide in that war. If they could survive encounters with advanced races like these, it wasn't fair for her to end up being killed by her own people in a ship that was not much more advanced than the White Star. "The First Ones," Marcus whispered to himself, "maybe, they left behind some technology that could help us."

He softly kissed Susan as he left the medical bay. "This isn't goodbye. It's only see you later."

Marcus sat at the computer screen feeling the first real hope that he had felt for days. He hacked and sifted through hundreds of files until he had found the one that he was looking at. It was an execution machine that healed by transferring the life force of the condemned to a sick or injured person to save their life. "This is perfect," Marcus thought, "I'll sacrifice myself to save Susan. That way we can always be together because I will live on inside of her."

Marcus needed a way to get off of the ship and return to Babylon Five where Susan and the healing device were. He thought about trying to take command of the White Star, but he knew that the crew would not obey his orders to leave the fleet while John was in command.

Marcus decided to commandeer a shuttle because he knew that they could not stop the fleet in Earth space to retrieve one man who went AWOL. He placed a fake engineering request in the computer that authorized the shuttle to leave the ship for testing. He knew that this would not last long, but it would work well enough to get him off of the ship.

Luckily, stealing the shuttle went exactly as he planned. "Besides," he thought, "it's not like I'll live long enough to suffer the consequences." He meditated and prepared for his death to pass the time as the shuttle headed to the station.

Fifteen hours later, Marcus arrived at the station. John had alerted station security and Stephen to his plan while he was en route, but that didn't pose a problem for Marcus. He knocked out the security in the cargo bay with his Denn'bok and headed to the cargo bay where the healing device was stored. He dealt with the security guards there in a similar manner and brought device to Med-Lab.

Dealing with the security guards in Med-lab was slightly harder because he had to protect the healing device. John had ordered the guards to destroy the healing device if necessary. Marcus threw an empty jar into the Med-bay ahead of him to trick the guards into turning around to check out the source of the noise. While their backs were turned, Marcus knocked them out from behind.

Then, he brought the device over and hooked it up to himself and Susan. He laid his head on her chest and listened to her breath grow stronger. He felt himself growing weaker. He felt himself losing consciousness, but he fought to hold on. The only desire he had left was to look into her eyes for one last time. As he felt his eyes close for the final time, he whispered, "I love you."