A/N: Chapter 5.

It's not that I don't like Edward, because I do; he's a good guy. It's just that he has a stick up his ass all the freaking time. The only time he doesn't seem pained to be around us is when he's around his freaking wife, as if her presence magically rips the pole from his rectum.

Have you ever been around someone who was just really condescending? Like everything you do is stupid or irrational, and they're the only mature human being in the world. And then after you finish embarrassing yourself, you just get awkward whenever you see this person, and you always watch what you say.

That's what it's like around Edward. He's a kill joy.

I've been living with the Cullens for a year now, roughly two years after I was bitten, but Edward and I have never had the opportunity to become close to one another. To be honest I don't want to bother, what with that attitude radiating off of him like heat.

"Good afternoon Sophia," he greets, shutting the door behind him.

Well it was a good afternoon. "Hey Edward."

"Just stopping by to check on you; see how you were doing."

"Thanks, I'm great. So if that's all --"

"I was worried, this being your first time out of the house and in a hospital no less. Sometimes Esme's decisions are rash, but what can you do. She has a good heart."

Maybe he won't stay for long? Oh, please go away. "Yeah," I say.

Edward takes a seat on one of the plush chairs in front of Carlisle's desk, and crosses his legs while simultaneously folding his hands together. His hands are smooth and white, save for the purple bruises under the skin, and look very slender and smooth. Emmett's hands, though just as smooth as Edward's, are a little more bulky. The same goes for Jasper. I wonder if my hands look the same.

Edward looks at me with a smile, though not a genuine one. It's more like an amused smirk, like he's testing my paitence with him. Again the uncomfortable feeling returns. I begin to fidget, twisting my fingers with my hands before dropping my gaze down on the desk. Edward doesn't say anything, but can feel him looking at me, waiting for me to say something.

Oh please go away. For the sake of my sanity. I think about spinning idly around in my chair until I want to puke. I also think about jumping out of the window behind the desk, and running as fast as my legs would allow me to until I hit the forest. I think about losing myself in the thick and misty woodlands of Forks. But the more I stay silent, the more I can feel his eyes upon me.

I should say something to break the silence. Maybe I should wait, see if he comes up with anything to talk about.

I slowly lift my lids to look up at Edward, but he's still sitting there with that amused and expectant face.

Damn. What do people talk about these days? I'll go with the weather. Everyone likes the weather.

"So," I say awkwardly, "... it's, uh... raining..."

The corner of Edward's mouth twitches. "As it does nearly every day."

"Right," I say. Well there goes the weather.

He's just a dude, Sophie. Dude, dude, dude, dude, dude. Dudey-dude.

He clears his throat.

"Do you like the rain?" I ask.

"It's necessary," he says, "but I prefer the tropics."

"Really?"

"Yes, South America. Mexico to be precise."

"I hear you're not supposed to drink the water."

He chuckles, a smooth but hearty one. "Lucky for me, I don't need to."

"Oh, right, being a ... vampire and all."

"And you?"

"Eh, I'm a history buff. I'd be happy as long as the place has a rich history, like Philadelphia, or the Vatican."

"I must admit that I quite like history," he says to me. "Everything's set in stone. It never changes. Like me."

I laugh.