Off The Sidelines (c) Chibi Botan

Chapter 2

.

Blank.

Hiei's mind must have shut down for hours. There was nothing else he could think of.

"She knew?" He remembered Kurama looking shocked when he said that.

"Apparently, she does. She's the only one who can. The power of the Jagan is complicated." Not a word was shared between them after that.

None of them expected Yukina to know that she is constantly followed, that an invisible string connects her to someone who keeps watch over her, let alone know how to cut it. They have no clue if Yukina knows who was following her, and Hiei would like to think that she doesn't.

For all they know she could have just felt uneasy, maybe she thought someone with evil intentions was following her? Only Yukina can tell them, but Hiei is not willing to ask.

.

Looking Back...

It started out as curiosity, when the team arrived to save Yukina from Tarukane. Hiei arrived later than the two spirit detectives, and went straight to beat the man who held her captive for so many years.

She rushed up the small viewing room that overlooked the arena where Yusuke had fought the Toguro brothers to stop him. Yukina does not like violence, and though Tarukane has been cruel to her, she would not let anyone turn violent for her. He didn't notice her, and as she went near she saw the hatred on his face while he beat her captor. Gently, she touched his arm, stopping him from delivering a strong blow to Tarukane's face. He looked at her, the first time, and held her stare.

She cannot explain what she felt then. There was something in his eyes.. sorrow? longing? caring? tenderness? Up to now, she still doesn't know. But what was important then was that he listened to her. He let Tarukane go, only because she asked him to. He wasn't happy about it, obviously, but the murderous look about him had dissipated. He left soon after, and Yukina did not have the opportunity to speak to him.

It was Yusuke and Kazuma who accompanied her back to her homeland. She should be happy to go back, but she felt half-hearted about it. It felt like she left something important in Ningenkai... so much that she grabbed the next opportunity to return. She still can't forget that curious feeling regarding the fire demon, and it's a major reason she needed to go back.

Still, she was having second thoughts on going back to the human world... until she heard that there will be a tournament. Yukina knew that her brother would be there, for he was supposed to be a powerful youkai.

Rui told her before that twins are said to have strong bonds, and suspected that if she made contact with her brother, she would most likely feel a connection between them. Keeping faith on that theory, Yukina decided to watch the tournament, in hopes that she would find her brother there. If there was any chance to find her brother, Yukina would grab it, however dangerous it would be.

.

A Strange Feeling

When she finally arrived at the arena, the semi-finals of the Toguro tournament was almost over. So it was only during the Finals that Yukina saw Hiei fight. She knew that he was one of the strongest fighters, but she was still in awe when she saw him in battle against Bui.

And there was something on that battle that made her wonder.

When Hiei released the ultimate kokuryuha, Bui had managed to return it to him, and for a minute there, everyone thought it devoured Hiei alive. Why, just why, had her heart seemed to stop beating at that moment? Sure, Yukina cares for all the Tanteis. She owes them her freedom, but this... it's just different. It couldn't just be because he's one of her heroes...

She didn't have enough time to think this deeper, for Hiei suddenly reappeared to inform everyone he's alive, unharmed by it all. Instead of being hurt from the kokuryuha, Hiei absorbed its power, making him almost undefeatable. The battle ended soon after that, and everyone was amazed by Hiei's display of awesome power, but everything was a blur in Yukina's mind.

She has yet to understand the fear she felt with the prospect of not seeing him again, and now she wonders why his safety made her feel as if it was the most important thing in the world.

.

The final piece of the puzzle

Yusuke defeated Toguro, and the Urameshi Team is officially declared winner of the tournament. But they were not given a chance to rejoice. Sakyou has blown up the walls of the arena. The remaining audience immediately ran for safety, and the girls were advised to vacate the area.

But there was a problem: Keiko was in a state of shock and she can't seem to hear them. As Botan tried to wake her from this state, telling her they must leave, Yukina heard a familiar voice calling her name. It was Kuwabara, and Yukina started to run towards him to tell him what happened to Keiko.

Yukina barely noticed that the wall to her right gave in-- and suddenly, Hiei was there, keeping her out of danger. He was holding her, and though she briefly touched his arms when she stopped him from killing Tarukane, this was the first physical contact with him. That feeling-- the feeling of connection...

"Don't just stand there.. run away." It was Hiei, saying this in his usual distant voice.

Suddenly she can't hear the commotion the stampede has been making. Everyone's shouts seemed to fade in the dusts of the fallen debris. She barely noticed Kazuma's face, and was entirely unaware of the jealousy he openly displayed.

Yukina vaguely remembered whispering "okay" .. or "thank you" .. or maybe both to Hiei, but whenever she looks back on this scene, all she could remember for sure was that... this was the moment when she knew.

.

Desperate Measures

Yukina waited patiently for the day Hiei would confess to her that he knew he's the brother she's been searching for. At least, she felt certain that he knows her identity from the start. There was the momentary fear that he might hate her as much as he probably hates the rest of the Koorime race, but one look at him and she knew he cares about her as much as she cares for him.

It seemed though, that he is not going to do anything about it. And even as patient as anyone could be, Yukina felt anxious about it. She wanted so much to tell him how long she waited, searched, and dreamed to find him. But Hiei has made an invisible barrier around him and even as his twin, Yukina felt unsure how to act around him.

And so she waited, until... That day, when Genkai told her that they were opening a portal to Makai. Yusuke, Kurama and Hiei are joining the Makai tournament, and in a few hours they will leave. The Toguro tournament may have been intense, but the Makai tournament would be something more dangerous. For what is at stake is the rulership of all Makai, and definitely every living youkai would want a chance on this.

There is no doubt that Hiei will give everything for it. Watching him, Yukina realized something. His was the look of someone who has nothing in life to motivate him, someone who is not afraid to leave this world, someone who has no one to live for. Yukina is hurt by this, but she tried to keep her pain hidden.

In any battle like this, there are only two outcomes-- to win or to lose. If Hiei won, he would stay in Makai for a very long time (maybe forever?) and if he lost... he might never come back. It seems that Hiei is content with the fact that she is safe, and maybe he doesn't feel the need to stay. Yukina doesn't want to think of these, but the fear is too much to bear. She cannot just keep on waiting.

She had to give Hiei a reason to come back, before it's too late...

.

The tear gems

Just before he stepped into the portal leading to Makai, Yukina made Hiei promise to find her brother for her. She needed to lie, to pretend she doesn't know, but then, she wasn't entirely lying. She wants him to decide when he comes back. And she asked him to tell her brother that she is waiting for him.

She handed him the Hiruseki from their mother, the only thing Hina has left for each of them. Yukina wanted to know where his tear gem is, but there was no way she could ask him. As she expected, he was surprised; the stone is far too important to entrust to someone who is supposedly a stranger.

She reasoned that he has to look for an identical stone, but in truth, she just wanted him to keep it, knowing that as long as he has the stone, he will always feel the need to return for her. A constant reminder that he is not alone, his twin sister is in Ningenkai waiting for him.

When he finally accepted it, Yukina felt the weight on her heart lift. He will return. It was an opportunity for him to tell her the truth. Now Yukina can only pray that when he comes back, he would finally be ready to tell her.

.

A Reason To Return

And he came back, unharmed. He met with her in front of Genkai's temple. Much to her despair, he only came to return the Hiruseki necklace to her.

"Your brother... I did not find him. He's probably dead."

Don't wait for me, I cannot be the brother you are looking for. This, Yukina knew, is what he meant.

Yukina's eyes clouded with unshed tears. No, she would not cry in front of him. She looked at him, a solemn look masking her pain.

She refused to accept the necklace. "You can keep it, you deserve it more than anyone." And she walked past him, not oblivious to the shock on his face.

Genkai, the only witness to this, chose that time to announce her presence. As Yukina walked farther from Hiei, she heard Genkai, in a disapproving tone, tell him, "Yukina's not the child you think she is."

She continued to walk, until she cannot hear them anymore. If Hiei gave a response to that, she wouldn't know.

I cannot accept the necklace, Hiei. For as long as you keep it, you will have a reason to return to me.

.

Why?

Yukina tried to think of the reasons why her brother does not acknowledge her. By the time they reached home, she had listed several possible reasons, and thinks some of it might be true.

And there is still the fact that she doesn't know what his life had been like after he was thrown from the floating island of the Koorime.

Maybe it was severe tiredom, that she fell asleep as soon as her body hit the bed. Her mind however, was not ready to lift her worries to unconsciousness-- even on her sleep, the reason on the top of her list kept nagging her.

Deep in her heart, Yukina fears that it is her weakness that keeps him from telling her. Hiei, whether he admits it or not, has a protective nature, and the kind of life he lives is one where he, as well as anyone close to him, is in constant danger.

Being a non-fighter definitely doesn't help.

And so when an offer to be trained as fighters was presented to them, it was not so hard for Yukina and Keiko to accept.

.

Just Before Dawn...

Looking out the window, a woman lit another cigarette stick, her thoughts on her brother who, like her, cannot sleep.

At the next door room, his brother is sitting on the floor, holding his pet, talking to it as though it can tell him what is happening.

Just a few feet away is the room of the girl, the reason of his worry. She was asleep, but we see a worried look on her face.

On the roof, directly on top of her bedroom, her brother is gazing at the sky, but keeping alert of his surroundings, trying to feel her presence.

With the same determination to keep vigil, a teenage boy stood just in front of his girlfriend's window, making sure she stays there.

Inside, his girlfriend slept, still holding the photo frame she's been staring at the whole night.

In the nearby district, a former thief was in deep thought, going over the past few days in his mind to scrutinize the situation with narrowed eyes.

At the spirit realm, a girl stayed up all night worrying for her friends, resisting the urge to visit them at a very early hour.

.

Thank you for reading!

Note that the last line, "In the nearby district..." is not mine. Fire in the Hole wrote it for me, because I went totally blank thinking of what Kurama might be doing at the last section. (So this is the end of my career as a KB writer and I haven't even started^-^) Alex, thank you so much! For everything.

I enjoyed writing this one most, because I've been wanting to write this for so long. Originally meant for a one-shot, but I found a place for it on this fic. Don't you just love the twins? I do, so much. They're just awesome... and sad. I've always wondered if Yukina ever knew about Hiei. After watching their special episode on Eizou Hakusho (which is where the scene, A Reason to Return came from - I basically just inserted the last line), I just felt that she actually does. And this came up. I hope you like it. Next up is Keiko and Yusuke. That would be a lot later though, because I have three chapters for Past Life waiting to be finished.

~ Justine / Chibi Botan

PS: I cheated-- I was scanning the manga while writing this. I had to make sure the details are right, like, when and where exactly did the twins have an interaction? Or at least appeared on the same scene. Things like that. I hope I got them right. If not, please tell me.